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Sirens sounding. Cue bad 80s pop music. Cameras at the ready. Bring up the lights. Enter stage left, host with a bad haircut and too much fake tan. 3, 2, 1 ACTION.

“Aaaaaaaand welcome to the Mamamia Open Post of the Week. Step on up and play the game. Post your comment and see what happens next”. Okay, so you’re not going to win a new car but we promise it’ll still be fun.

Open Post is a weekly Mamamia tradition, where we turn our desks around and let you take total control of the keyboard. This is your chance to talk about, well, whatever you like. It’s less about the post and ALL about the comments.

Today we are trying something new and we’re bringing you an Open Post gallery with a difference. Here is a look back at the week that was through Twitter, Instagram and all things social media:

This happened.

 

On My Mind (OMM) this week: is romance. Or more precisely, lack of romance.

Now I’m probably not going to reach my target audience with this message but to any of the men who ARE reading this: get your shit together. Seriously. I am over the “do you feel like getting a drink, you know, after work or something?,” and the “so whaddya feel like doing?” and the “Let’s pencil in 7pm but I might have to work late”. No. No. No.

Gentlemen, THIS is a date:

 

That.

Magic carpets, starlit skies, flying ponies, tigers and turbans. You don’t have to be a prince (although I’m not ruling princes out, any single princes should feel free to call the Mamamia offices and ask for Jamila)…You just have to bring it.

Us girls, we want a good date. And given that we’ve just spent approximately two hours waxing and plucking and moisturising and tanning and bronzing and styling hair and putting on make-up and trying out multiple outfits – I think we deserve one.

Best date I’ve ever been on: he picked me up, we went to the art gallery and then to the fish market and sat on the grass outside, eating everything we’d just bought and drinking cheap wine. It wasn’t expensive, it wasn’t fancy – but it required a bit of effort and it made me feel special.

Okay, rant over. Almost.

Because last night I was walking home from the bus stop with one of my housemates and a homeless guy approached us. We both presumed he was asking for spare change but then he said “I don’t want money but you sir, should be carrying her bags.” Bam. Just like that. (Disclaimer: my housemates are both lovely blokes and offer to carry my bags all the time.)

Now I know that’s chivalry rather than romance but you know what? Homeless guy has restored my faith in male-kind this week and the rest of you men, could learn a thing or two.

Mamamia is looking for community moderators:

Do you enjoy being a part of the Mamamia community? Are you one of our regular readers and commenters? Then we would love to have you play a bigger role and become a part of our team.

As the site continues to grow, we’ve decided we need some community moderators to help us keep the friendly vibe that we’ve always worked so hard to maintain.

If you’re interested, please let us know by commenting on this post and we’ll be in touch soon.

What’s on your mind this week?

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Comments

Comment Guidelines : Imagine you’re at a dinner party. Different opinions are welcome but keep it respectful or the host will show you the door. We have zero tolerance for any abuse of our writers, our editorial team or other commenters. So if you’re rude, mean-spirited, snarky, aggressive, defamatory or bitchy, your comment will be deleted (so will any replies to the original comment – so don’t bother arguing with rude people, instead just hit the ‘alert moderator’ button).
And if you’re offensive, you’ll be blacklisted and all your comments will go directly to spam. Remember what Fonzie was like? Cool. That’s how we’re going to be – cool. Have fun and thanks for adding to the conversation…

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415 Comments so far

  1. tesla energy from air

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  2. Anonymous

    Yay google is my world beater aided me to locate this outstanding website! . {tory burch outlet store|tory burch outlet|tory burch

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  3. Kris2040

    Hey guys, I’ll stick my hand up to mod. I was actually half seriously thinking about it last week anyway!

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  4. Carly Findlay

    I’m in London at the moment and loving it! Though travelling alone and soon to be moving into a hotel for a week. Travelling alone is a bit lonely so if there are any Aussies (or anyone really) who wants to catch up that’d be great. Drop me a line through my blog. http://CarlyFindlay.blogspot.com

    I have seen lots of cool stuff so far – my favourite has been Camden and The Changing of the Guard at Buckingham Palace

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  5. Jo

    So…I was wondering if anyone knows how to lose weight post baby…I have been trying and failing for three years now. Sometimes I almost feel like it is impossible, but all the time I see people who do it, so I don’t really see why I can’t. Just wondering if anyone has wise advice?

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  6. 19 8 1 14 5

    I have only one thing to say this week.

    Chemo sucks.

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    • Haven Maven

      :( *hugs and virtual cupcakes*

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    • Louisec

      It must be awful, really hope you start feeling better soon xxx

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  7. MelB

    This site has been my companion for over 2 years now and I would be thrilled to have the chance to contribute as a community moderator.

    I learned about this site after reading Mia’s book and since then I’ve been a regular reader and have introduced many friends who are now also daily readers.

    Keeping my fingers crossed to be able to help out the site.

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  8. casey

    Everyone loves the idea of being a community moderator! (Including me).

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  9. 19 8 1 14 5

    I wonder what would happen if this was in Melbourne…

    http://www.news.com.au/world/town-designates-tricky-men-only-parking-spots/story-fndir2ev-1226424129250

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  10. Brittney

    Hi Mamamia, Im interested in being a community Moderator

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  11. Dolly Levi

    Does anyone have a good recipe for a sponge cake?
    My brothers birthday is coming up and there are a lot of recipes online… Anyone made one that turned out really well and could recommend a recipe?

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  12. katherine anne

    OMM: Loving Mamamia this week. A great mix of stories that have kept me glued to my screen since Mia’s porn article on Sunday.

    Keep up the good work!

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  13. londoneye

    OMM: The source of many Mamamia posts is now quoting Mia :-)

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2171541/Teen-sparks-controversy-wins-modelling-contest-aged-just-THIRTEEN.html

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  14. OssieLeo

    Best: I have a really nice team at work now which makes a huge difference.
    Best: my friend made me licorice ice cream and it is Devine :)
    Worst: my middle boy has mild Aspergers which effects him socially and he doesn’t really have any friends. They had a class rep election at his class and he was the only child that didn’t get a vote :( he came home quite sad and told me that he wishes he was born ‘normal’. My heart broke just a little as he is coming to an age where he is starting to understand that he is a bit different than others. I told him how proud I am that he put himself out there and that he is normal, just a different normal and that he is special but since he has gone to bed, I have been sitting here crying and just want to shelter him and take the pain away. He is such a beautiful boy. I know it’s not the end of the world and that there are people out there going through worse but… He is my baby and our and his life is hard enough as it is. Ok rant over.. Off to have ice cream x

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    • Bel

      Just read your post and was simply compelled to reply, I’m not sure how old your son is, but I’m thinking upper primary if you mentioned class elections, prob for student rep council or the like…. Anyways… I digress, I’m a mum of 4, and our eldest has aspergers as well. Oh the primary years are tough and high school in some ways even tougher, but when puberty rears it’s ugly head those years are tough enough but add this “invisible disorder” to the mix and it’s challenging beyond belief. But the reason for my post is this, you get through, he will too, there will be many more bumps along the way, but between the two of u you will find your best way, be there to advocate, encourage and help him learn step by step what others take for granted. As they get older, graduate from high school it does get easier, as they start to mix with young adults they are much more accepted, kids an ve really tough, but adults understand it takes lots of different people to make the world spin, his “differences” won’t be as noticeable, as they move into a more eclectic multicultural environment like uni or tafe. As a mum of a child with aspergers we do more than our fair share of crying, and it’s usually after a challenging day once they are tucked up into bed, we go to bed and fall apart in the dark. You sound like a lovely mum who cares deeply for her boy, and he is lucky to have you in his corner. Don’t let the haters get u down, and don’t sweat the small stuff, just focus on what’s I important to him. No, he might not get voted sports captain, or win a popularity contest at school, but he might just make an awesome chess team member, or captain of the mathletics team. Find his strength and you’ll find yours. Much luck to u both

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  15. Anonymous

    I agree with you Jamila and at 23 experience exactly the same things! There is a serious lack of romance! It is soo flattering when a man actually puts effort into planning a proper date & makes an effort with his appearance etc instead of just a last minute ‘wanna hang out later?’

    OMM: I have been struggling with depression/anxiety issues for a long long time now. I have gone to see loads of people and currently seeing a GP and about to start seeing a psychologist and start a DBT group program. These are all positives but the anxiety/depression is so overwhelming that I don’t really have a life right now!
    Currently my days consist of waking late, walking my dog, going to cafes, spending loads of time on the internet, watching tv shows and basically creating errands to do. I live with my mum so see her everyday and talk to my father and grandma but that’s really it. There are some friends I could try to reach out to but I avoid that for fear of nothing to talk about and not feeling connected. I often feel worse after trying to socialise or go out somewhere as I experience high anxiety and cannot enjoy myself or connect. I feel quite trapped in this world because I worry I am not well enough to work or go back to uni. It is so lonely and boring though and I have moments of horrific despair thinking nothing will ever get better. I find it hard to imagine a future and my life.
    Has anyone else experienced anything similar and come out of it?

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    • Anon

      Oh you poor little darling.Reading this was like looking back at myself 30 years ago. I won’t tell you what I did because I did things wrong.You seem to be headed in the right direction. It’s great that you are planning counseling & group.Make sure you like your therapist,keep looking until you find one you feel comfortable with. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and once I took these measures I could function normally and went on to marry and have children.I applaud you for taking the positive steps that you have and please don’t give up.I know you can be well.Lots of love your way

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      • Louisec

        What a lovely reply..just hearing from someone helps so much and your reply was just wonderful. I hope it helps her and am sure it will xx

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  16. Anon for this...

    Hi ya :)
    OMM is that fact there are just 4 more days to get through before school goes back…4…count em slowly!
    My little thing thats been bugging me though for these school hols is…(believe it or not the actual children!) but a couple of friends I feel have been using my generosity to their advantage. Quick background: I am a single mum, I have an 8 yr. old son and a 3 yr old girl. I am on a single parent pension, still going through financial settlement with my ex. i.e.: I aint flush with money. I am however not working and can get by at the moment with the child support etc. Its better right now for me to stay home with my daughter til she is in school, financially and emotionally for me.
    I digress, my point is that I have two friends…both of whom are single mums with sons of their own (school age) same as my son. They are both working jobs and since school hols came up and I am at home I made an offer to both of them separately that I could look after their sons if they needed it as for both of them if they didn’t work, they didn’t get paid. This has happened in previous school hols also. Ive offered, and they’ve accepted graciously. I indicated a day or so “if they got stuck” would be cool. I”ve had both of them for 8 days of 10 so far…. :(
    My beef is that Ive got an inkling that I’m never really going to get “paid back” for this…I feel quite mean even saying it on here. But if it were me I’d be so freaking gracious, I’d be offering sleepovers on my days off to the mum who’d been looking after them.
    I mean I’ve fed and watered these other mums kids for days. They don’t even turn up with a packet of biccies in the morning! Id at least pick up a pizza on my way back for dinner for everyone at the “minding persons” house. maybe thats just me?!? I mean I’m saving them much more money than the cost of a pack of biccies or pizza but its the gesture and the appreciation right?? Not to mention the ramshackle my house is in. The forstfew days I was all, screechy and OCD..shoes off in the house!! Now week 2 I’m slumped in the couch just happy they shut the actual door on their way back in.
    I don’t even know what to say…I’m really disappointed in my two friends and do feel a bit used, especially now this is the second lot of school hols its happened :(

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    • Josie

      You have got every right to feel extremely peeved. It costs money to have additional children in your home, by you having the children you are saving their mums the cost of holiday childcare. The very least that they can do is give you some money to help with the food costs or send food with the kids. Hell they should be paying you to look after their kids.

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    • Anonymous

      That’s not fair at all. When I drop either of my children off anywhere I send them with a packed lunch box + money for activities in case the family is doing something. And even then I try to repay the favor in some way.

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    • stacey87

      Wow, I can totally understand where you are coming from, I would be pretty upset if this happened to me! I am a single parent with a three year old daughter, and I work part time. On occasion when her daycare is shut for any reason, I need to find other care (for the four hours I work). Usually I have friends or my family who offer to help, and on these occasions I ALWAYS pack a full lunch, plus any spending money, plus a minimum of $50 as a small thanks (which my mum usually refuses, insisting a coffee will be fine).

      Anyway, my point is, that your friends should be showing a lot more gratitude than they are, let alone not taking advantage of your offer in the first place. The honest thing to do would be to confront them and say something like “next school holidays I will be able to mind the kids for only one or two days as I feel you have taken advantage of the friendship and my generousity” etc.

      Or you could subtly say that the school holidays always seem to run your budget to the maximum, and you are always exhausted, even though you aren’t too sure why.. and see your friends reaction. Maybe they are too busy or focussing on other things to really realise that in fact you DO mind…or maybe they will be shifty and nothing will change, in which case you may be better off finding other people to spend your time with, and maintaining the kids’ friendships in a fair, mutual meet up kind of environment.

      Whatever works, sometimes small comments like that might be enough for your friends to realise..

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    • Perthite

      Why not charge a day rate? It will still be cheaper for them than formal care and there’s an upside for you.

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  17. Anonymous

    Chivalry isn’t entirely dead although I mostly find it in older men. On Anzac Day I stopped by Cols to get some groceries. On the way back to the car, there was a huge fight going on outside in the car park between about 20 guys. This older man (I’d say at least in his 70′s, maybe older. He was on two walking sticks) stopped me and warned me about the fight. He said that I could stay with him and he would walk me to my car if I wanted and he would protect me, it was so sweet! Men who were much younger were just walking past me, didn’t even warn me.
    warn me let alone offer to “protect me”

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  18. Sally

    Hi MM,

    I use an iPhone and for ages now I haven’t been able to view your gallery properly. Sometimes, like today, there’s no Gallery link to click on? And often when there is, it doesn’t display the comments that go along with the pics. Please looking at fixing it as I love flipping through them, especially each week’s Open Post. Love it!

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  19. karli

    Hi … I am interested in moderating …. :-)

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  20. Emma

    Completely unrelated, but what happened to Rick? I haven’t seen any of his posts in a while.

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    • Rick Morton

      I just popped on to flick through the gallery of my former teamsters and looky what I find! I decided to head back to my journalism roots, just started this week as a news hound with The Australian. Already hit the ground running!

      I miss this lot oodles, the friendly faces in the office and the readers!

      xxx

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      • Olympia

        Still missing you here Rick. It’s just not the same any more without your unique take on life in general. Congratulations on the new job anyway. All the best.

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      • Emma

        Congrats Rick, thanks for your reply.

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      • londoneye

        Read your article on Darrel Lea on the Australian online today :-)

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      • Bunny

        Congratulations, Rick, what an awesome appointment for you!

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  21. AnotherMelB

    Hi Jamila
    I would like to send a little wave about the community moderator opportunity. I’ve read every comment on every post since 2008, I may as well make myself useful while I do it :) Hope to hear from you…
    Best, MelB

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  22. Jack

    I love MM, it is a great site with diverse perspectives.

    BUT I am over the trashy/tabloid headlines

    “I’m Catholic and I’m Ashamed”

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  23. Mimi

    Happy hump day!

    Been a great week started with payrise and bonus! Totally unexpected n feel really proud of myself! Will be putting it towards trip to brasil :) …had today off to visit my dear old granny it was a great day sunshine n lots of cups of tea!

    OMM: miss my mummy so much! She is home from Europe in 2 weeks! Not long now!

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  24. fifi-lulu

    OMM: I’m organising my mother’s 70th birthday party while she is overseas on holiday with my father.

    A friend of hers calls to RSVP and tells me ‘I miss your Mum, I drive pass her house all the time. I miss our coffee and chats. I am really sad that she’s not here’. So very touching coming from someone in her late 70s who has known my Mum since she was 24.

    I miss my Mum too! Less than 3 weeks to go.

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  25. sad

    On my mind….

    The death of a relative – sudden, accidental, tragic.
    A man in is late 30s who leaves behind a wife and 2 little boys.
    It could so easily have happened to any of us.

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  26. maggie

    I don’t think the responsibility of an amazing date should be always on the guys anymore. 21st century, I am sure they like to be surprised and spoilt too. Look at wedding proposes and SATD’s. Times are changing!

    I do this more for my BF than he does for me, its the person that I am, and he isn’t that guy. But he far for makes up for it in other aspects.

    He loves when I spoil him, and gets all shy and it’s cute. But his support and love for me makes up for the lack of romance :)

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  27. Alley Cat

    Jamila, totally hear you re: the date thing. BUT, I’m bloody confused.
    I was wooed to the extreme, beautifully planned dates etc. and then after about 6 weeks the guy disappears of the face off the earth, messages me a week later and tells me he feels like a “coward” for not telling me the truth that his ex gf is back in his life. Cheers, buddy. Hope that one worked out for you. Why can’t you just be honest with me to begin with? Why can’t you just CALL ME or arrange a coffee? This text message business – BULLS***.

    THEN there was the guy who took me on a nice date, and proceeded to message me the next day telling me how nice it was. Then he said “what exciting dates do you have planned for me?” HUH?!? I was still digesting last night’s dinner you bought me! Needless to say I forgot to write back to that message.

    Far out. Get it together, men of Australia. I’m not interested now until someone walks up to me, tells me he wants to take me out and then does it. No weird questions, no ex girlfriends still in the picture, don’t give me an opportunity to pay. Just let me enjoy myself. If it all goes well God help me cause I’ll probably be cleaning your toilet and making your dinner for the rest of my life.

    PHEW. Rant over.

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  28. cher

    So excited! Found a real live bookshop today while I was in a different part of town waiting to pick up my kids from a holiday activity. It was incredible! Bought 3 books then went back an hour later and bought another one. And, the place was full of people, browsing and buying. I’m ready to move in!

    My local shopping centre is huge but only has one soul-less little bookshop in the whole centre :(

    Had a moment of hope today that the world won’t end, there will still be bookshops to browse in :)

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  29. Cordeline

    Where do the ‘like’ buttons keep going? On this particular post I can see them on Page 1 but not on Page 2. And on others I can’t see them at all…

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  30. Xanthe

    Can anybody tell me why it is that gyms will NOT tell you the membership fee?
    They hum and hah and offer options and extras and make my head hurt.
    Were gym owners used-car salesmen in previous lives…?
    What’s wrong with an upfront fee which entitles you to this, and this, and this? And you can opt for the extras?
    And why don’t they want to take cash?
    Mystified.

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    • Lolly

      I recommend you go to an independent gym, we’ve found with the several we have belonged to that they are more than happy to tell us the price upfront and text us special offers when our membership is up for annual renewal as well. Also there are no ‘sales consultants’ there to try and fleece you!

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      • Xanthe

        Huh. Independent gyms here are the same as the franchises. Won’t be upfront, and don’t want to take cash.
        Thanks for the reply, though, Lolly

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        • Anonymous

          Try Jetts. And there’s no lock in contract

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    • elle

      Where do you live? I HATE gyms like that and avoid at all costs. It is all part of the manipulating sales techniques but shits me so much. Community run gyms are way cheaper, upfront and no bullshit. In Sydney YMCA Gyms are great (Ian Thorpe Aquatic Centre & Cook & Phillip)

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    • Bunny

      Xanthe, I’m a member of a gym run by my local council, and they’ve always told me up front the cost to join for a year or to pay monthly. Does you local town or shire council have any facilities that would suit your needs?

      I’ve previously inquired into 24 hour gyms like Jetts, Anytime Fitness and Snap and they’ve also told me the cost to join on a monthly basis.

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    • Kris2040

      I’ve joined gyms about 5 times now, I’ve never paid a joining fee. They often have them but always have promotions where they’re waiving the joining fee, or if you have a friend who’s a member and they refer you, there’s no joining fee. You just need to keep an eye out and jump!

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  31. Mandy

    Thank you for not having a post about Lara Bingle’s television show. It seems like the ‘backlash’ from last week was taken on board. Great to know!

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    • elle

      I really missed the Lara Bingle post! They made me laugh so much!

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  32. call me cynical

    modzilla`s? eeekkkkk

    Good luck with that!

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    • Jackson

      I too am a bit concerned about getting volunteers to be moderators.
      It seems a bit like censorship and that is not a path that should be considered here.
      I hope that there are some safe guards put in place to ensure no one becomes “trigger”happy.
      Perhaps the usual alert moderator button and then 2-3 mods have to agree to delete??
      Or What about a vote system where a comment can get thumbs up or down/ If a comment gets a certain amount of thumbs down then someone can moderate and decide if it needs deletion.
      I just think this will be open to abuse but I do understand that the MM team can’t be everywhere all the time.
      I am a bit curious though, whenever this is bought up Mia and the team are always quick to point out that there are not many problems here and they only delete a handful of comments, if this is the case, why the need for more moderation??

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      • Cold

        I think it’s because the site is growing. Most of the questionable comments occur after usual working hours, that’s when the trolls appear as well. Censorship isn’t always a bad thing when you look at some of the stuff that’s been posted here. Besides, it’s not a democracy, it’s Mia’s website. We’re all just guests!

        I think the mods would have to be established site members & people with a good track record of posting.

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      • Natalia

        Hey Jackson,
        Trust me – there will be no censorship! We are still figuring out details but it will just be another way of making sure we are across comments on every post. While we do only have to delete a handful of comments, we still read every comment just so we know what people are discussing, etc. Hope that makes sense.

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      • Mia

        Jackson – moderators won’t be able to delete, just provide some front-of-house hospitality, have a quiet word when things need to be cooled down and alert us if there are comments that require our attention.

        Why do we need them?
        Because we’re posting more times a day than ever, there are more comments than ever, we’re also trying to service instagram, I have ivillage.com.au to oversee and there are only so many hours in the day……

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        • Jackson

          Fair enough Mia.

          I did say that I understand that you and your staff can’t be everywhere at once. I just remembered reading on a few occasions it being said that you don’t really have to delete many comments and I wondered why more moderators might now be needed. I am glad to hear that the mods will not be able to delete at will.

          By the way, love all the extra posts each day and I do appreciate the effort involved in getting this site to us each day.
          Thanks!!

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        • princesstan

          As someone who has moderated on a volunteer basis for an international artists official website I can tell you that the first thing that needs to be done is registered members comments only. Once you enforce that half your issues will be solved.

          And for those wanting to volunteer, it’s hard work!

          Best of luck!

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        • Anonymous

          Couldn’t you pay people to do that? Forgive my bluntness but it seems a bit stingy to get volunteers to do it. And the alert moderator thing is already available to everyone?

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      • Petal

        I think the thumbs down button is a great idea!

        Just noticed as soon as I signed in, the ‘like’ button for all posts disappeared. Now can’t ‘like’ anything.

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        • Anonymous

          I think thumbs down button is not a good idea. Not to sound like a hippie but it adds a negative vibe. People can already disagree with comments by writing something.

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          • Charlotte

            Yes and people who disagree with an opinion will use thumbs down not just if something is inappropriate.

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            • Jules

              I don’t know. I visit a site that has a thumbs up and down option and it’s actually quite interesting to see the balance of ‘thumbs up’ v ‘thumbs down’. I don’t see it as negative, it’s more realistic in a way – and the good comments almost always get a fair ratio of ‘ups’ : ‘downs’.

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  33. kirsten

    OMM: Bullying and accusations on here about bullying and people being nasty to one another.
    Not agreeing with someone is not bullying nor is expressing my opinion about something that I believe in.
    Making a comment or statement which other people think has been ‘done to death’ is not bullying.
    Clicking on like to a comment that disagrees with the comment above isn’t bullying either.
    I don’t think most people on here are rude or inappropriate or attacking others when they disagree and I enjoy a debate and being given other points of view. I’ve actually had my eyes opened to things I’d never thought of as a result of considered arguments. However, some people seem to have their radars up for any reason to be offended.
    It will be interesting to see what your moderators consider bullying on this site.

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    • cmx

      I agree for the most part. But, I do find some people on here – not many, but some, purposely antagonistic, and seem to be trying to get a rise out of others. Now, it could just be how I’m reading it – it can be hard to convey tone in writing.

      I too enjoy a debate, if we all had the same opinions life would be very boring! It’s good to get a different viewpoint too, something you may not have considered.

      However I am a firm believer in “treat people as you wish to be treated”. Tact and manners go a long way in life.

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  34. Rabbitsal

    Me, me, me pls!!! I’m on mat leave so have plenty of time to help out. And I bake! haha…. oh pls let it be me!

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  35. OW

    I am a “long-time listener” but first time poster and I would LOVE to be a moderator for MM.

    I work in comms, but perhaps more interestingly I am a chivalrous bloke… SO much so that I agonise over whether I’m being gentlemanly or kind-hearted pretty much every day.

    Is it naff to walk on the curb side of your fiancee? Or is it just the right thing to do? These are the struggles I deal with every day. (life is tough) I also know all the lyrics to “whole new world”…

    Let me know if I can help.

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    • mg

      See girls, the chivalrous ones always get snatched up…

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  36. Lulu

    “As the site continues to grow, we’ve decided we need some community moderators to help us keep the friendly vibe that we’ve always worked so hard to maintain.”

    My unsolicited advice: restricting comments to registered members would probably reduce the need for moderators a little.

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    • MissV

      I agree Lulu,
      it’s usually the people who hide behind the variations of ‘anon’ or change their name every time they come on here who are quite rude. Having a name that others can identify you with makes you think about what you are writing and how it comes across.

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  37. lozzie

    Took a day of annual leave today to celebrate my birthday.
    Its an absolutely gorgeous sunny day in Sydney. Went to a lovely cafe with beach views for a delicious lunch and then moved on to a neighbouring cafe for yummy dessert & dessert wine.
    Feeling very relaxed.
    Out to dinner with the family tonight.
    Having a great day.
    Hope everyone else is too.

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  38. Veggiegirl

    Best: Thinking I was recovering well from a rectopexy 3 weeks ago.
    Worst: the out of this world excruciating pain in my stomach last night indicating I’m nowhere near out of the woods yet. I honestly thought I was going to vomit, pass out or die from the pain :-/
    Omm: why I had this problem in the first place as I’m only 23, never had kids or internal trauma, eat a “health freak diet”, but still have been struggling with this since I was 18 when I first developed chronic fatigue. I know I should be so thankful to have a loving family, a roof over my head, but I feel like I’ve lost my youth to this, and have just tried so hard to obtain good health while others my age go out, get drunk, eat shit and are perfectly healthy. Oh well. C’est la vie!

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    • Louisec

      Very sorry to hear you have been so ill. What is a rectopexy? What is causing your problem?

      Don’t worry, it will catch up with them in the future, you can’t sustain that lifestyle. I became very very ill when I was about 32 and it was terrible, but I’m glad it happened then when I was young as you do recover quicker. Really hope you feel better soon xxx

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      • Veggiegirl

        Thank you so much Louisec, I really appreciate your reply. I love this community and how supportive it can be. I hope you are in great health these days :) The op was to try and repair an internal large intestine prolapse. I’m not really sure why it developed to be honest. A possible collagen problem was talked about a bit but te surgeon didn’t really give me a lot of information to go with.
        Thanks again for your kind words. I was feeling really down and youve made me smile. I’d hug you if I could!

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        • Louisec

          Hey Veggie Girl, it’s awful when you’re seriously ill and everyone elses life just goes on. But know that this will pass and you will be better soon – the sooner the better!

          i know what it’s like when you’re stuck at home ill and you worry, worry that you’re never going to get better, worried that your friends may forget you, worried that life will pass you by. But just know that you will be ok. Soon.

          There’s lots of support on here, we all have our challenges that’s for sure! Hugs to you and kisses from my furry girls xx

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  39. oopsyboops

    Well being wooed is nice, but it doesn’t have to be over the top. I remember how husband used to (still does on occassion) open the car door for me. That was nice. And it must have worked, as yesterday was our 13th wedding anniversary! But now we have a nice companionship love. We don’t need to show off our love in flashy ways, it just is. I don’t need trinkets or flowers. Just knowing he is there for me is enough :)

    And I’m interested in being a moderator too :)

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  40. Cinnamon

    Ok I can’t see the like button anymore… I could 2 mins ago!

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  41. Cinnamon

    OMM today is the amount of food wastage that happens at work. I work part-time at a store that holds cooking classes and today it just really hit me how much food is wasted in the classes! For every class that is held we have to put on a snack tray for the students for them to nibble on if they want to during the class, basically whatever is left on the tray at the end is tossed (today a whole bunch of bread and grapes – still perfectly good) and basically any food they make if it is not eaten at the end by one of us who work there that is also tossed as well. I’m talking about perfectly good food! Unfortunately it just seems like others that work there don’t really care and are happy just to toss things. Today for example the class was a knife skills class where the students learn the correct techniques of using different knives etc and they made a simple soup and fruit salad, well half the soup ended up getting thrown out as well as a perfectly good fruit salad!

    I mean uhhhh it is so frustrating to see that happen! But what to do about it? I follow this girl on instagram who does this thing where she writes down what food has been wasted at her house each week and sticks it on her fridge. I think that is a great idea and having something like that in writing really makes you realise how much food is actually wasted.

    The other thing OMM is my big fat lip! oh yeh I got whacked in the mouth with a paella pan in class today! Of course it was an accident – wrong place at the wrong time but man it hurt and now it’s just super annoying and swollen :( not to mention hard to eat! Hopefully the swelling will go down soon! Glad my teeth were ok.

    Also been playing cat and mouse with my mum lately, each time she calls I end up missing her calls and vice versa, finally got to speak to her for a bit after work!

    Ok it’s 1.30am here so hopefully my posts makes sense….

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    • oddsocks

      Any homeless shelters nearby that you could donate the food too? Or a local church that could hook you up with families that could use a random grocery boost now and then?

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      • Cinnamon

        I was thinking that…I’m sure there are places that could use the food but the company I work for is fairly big do I’d have to go through a few people to even get the idea on board. Worth a shot though I guess!

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    • oopsyboops

      Is there anywhere like food harvest over there? There must be some charities that could take the food. Or even a local orphange or something lol. I know when I worked at the drug and alcohol rehab we used to go down to the local bakery at closing time and they would give us any leftover stock. It was great. Maybe connect with a local church even, they might have some ideas? Or take it home yourself? Not sure what the food laws are like over there though.

      Ouch to your lip.

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      • Cinnamon

        We have been told we are not allowed to take any food home with us do there goes that idea. Also Im not sure what organisations are out there that deal with this kind of thing but will look into it for sure!

        Thanks re my lip!

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    • Jess88

      Hi cinnamon
      Could you maybe approach your boss about having a feed the needy organization come to your work a few afternoons a week to collect the excess food? I used to work for a donut shop in a shopping complex that also housed a Brumbys bakery, every Monday, Wednesday and Friday someone from a homeless organization would stop by and collect any unsold produce from the donut shop and the bakery, I thought it was a great idea.

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      • Cinnamon

        Hey Jess88 that sounds like a good idea I will have a talk with the store manager but will have to find an organisation first. Thanks

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        • jess88

          Snap! Looks like four of us suggested pretty much the same thing to you instantaneously! Thanks for taking the time to reply to each of our suggestions :)

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          • Cinnamon

            Hey jess88 not a problem and thanks again for your suggestion!

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    • sundress

      Could you talk to your boss about donating the food? Do you have a service like Ozharvest in your area?

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      • Cinnamon

        I’m sure there is something similar here just don’t know about it yet will have to do some research on this! Thanks :)

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    • Rach the Muso

      Wastage in this country appalls me, in all forms. They think it is weird not to have your air con/heat on all the time. They wash dishes by running them under the tap and scrubbing. They serve meals that are so big most people can’t finish them. I’m not surprised your colleagues don’t really notice, because it seems to me to be normal here…and it shouldn’t be!

      It would be wonderful if your workplace could donate the food, but in the country that made litigation an art form, I can imagine just how many hoops you would need to jump through. Worth giving it a go, though!

      Hope your weather has cooled off like it has in IL. 30°C and sunny today. Beautiful!

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      • Cinnamon

        I know Rach you are so right re the wastage here! I mean they don’t even air dry their clothes and run dryers all the time too! We have been told we ate not allowed to hang our clothes out to dry even though we have the room for it and it’s bloody hot outside! It was around 28 here today was actually a nice day it’s been pretty hot!

        I have a feeling I’m going to have to push to get something like this done but it will be worth it if it works out!

        Uhhhh anyway im off to bed I can’t keep my eyes open any more lol!

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        • Essie

          Why are you not allowed to hang your clothes out? That’s bananas! Good luck with your food wastage issue – hopefully all that food will find a way to people who really need it!

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          • Cinnamon

            Hey Essie… sorry for the late reply (time difference!). I know it is crazy when we first moved here our apartment had NO room for drying clothes outside (no balcony etc) so we were forced to use a dryer ALL the time… I was so not used to that. Now we have moved to a place that has a big terrace out front were you can easily dry your clothes outside BUT the management say it will ruin the look of the place if we hang our clothes out to dry!

            I have seriously not seen any clothes lines outside since moving here it’s like people think it is the weirdest thing to do! Plus it is much much cheaper to run a dryer here than it is back home so I think people just don’t see what the problem is.

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            • Jules

              I was told once that having a clothes dryer there is a bit of status symbol and that hanging clothes out signals to everyone that you’re too poor to afford one.

              Not sure if it’s the case anymore but might explain it. Sounds hideous to me, clothes dried on a line are SO much nicer.

              Having said that, some Body Corporates here in Oz do forbid clothes lines to be see from the street as it looks untidy.

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  42. merindakennedy

    I read almost all the posts most days, and I am interested in the moderator role.

    In regards to romance, I got a facebook message from a guy I dated but hadn’t heard from in a months (he went AWOL after about 4 dates and it was never found out what happened). Anyway, he messages me out of the blue asking how I am and what I’ve been doing. Reply that I’m surprised he is contacting me, as I’d assumed he wasn’t interested as it has been so much time. Said that wasn’t the case and he was interested.

    Anyway… let him know that I wasn’t keen on catching up as I am not a fan of people that run hot and cold. Writes back saying he was just saying hello and being friendly… WTF?! Glad I got out of that one! Douche bag.

    Positive – got a date next week. Guy is nice, articulate & hot. Fingers crossed.
    OMM – Europe is less than three weeks away. GET ME OVER THERE ALREADY!

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    • Louisec

      Lucky escape from that one!

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  43. FNQGirl

    I would love to be a community moderator. I’m a huge fan of Mamamamia, I have some writing experience and I’m available during the day..and evening too!

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  44. ameliastclair

    Currently in Pokhara, Nepal volunteering in one of the hospitals over here – under-resourced is an understatement! Will take some snaps of the NICU and Labour wards tomorrow and post a few. Oh. My . Gravy.

    On a positive note, the locals are so lovely and nothing is too much trouble. Feeling really lucky to be spending a month in this beautiful country :) x

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  45. Dee of Adelaide

    Call for help MM crowd…

    My sister got the internet at home yesterday (I KNOW! I got it at home 15 years ago and she is 30 and got it at home after using it at the library for years)

    So I’m sitting her baby sitting Little Lad and his birthday twin cousin whilst the big kids are at the movies and am setting up her bookmarks today.

    What sites should I put in? (if MM will let people recommend)

    She is a SAHM and her interests are parenting, parenting boys, shabby chic furniture type things, celebrity/trashy mags, shopping (and yes, we are nothing alike and she is my bestie :-)

    Where sould I be sending her?

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    • Laws for Clouds

      My favourite blogger who covers almost all those things is Girls Gone Child.

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      • KJ

        She’s my favourite too. Beautiful writing and photos
        I’ve got a bit of a girl-crush, if I’m honest ;)

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      • Cinnamon

        I don’t even have kids and I read her blog all the time and follow her on instagram like crazy lol

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    • girly

      Ebay
      MM (of course)

      Is she a bookworm? If so:
      Booktopia.com

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    • Essie

      people, babble, tlc parentables, etsy, pinterest.

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    • Scarlet

      Young House Love will change her life :) Great site about home decorating & families

      Girls Gone Child is also fab

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    • Louisec

      Just found out about this fantastic blog by a single mother – it’s fantastic http://bumpyroadtobubba.com/

      Pinterest.com she would love, it’s fantastic. And taste.com.au for recipes.

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    • Happymum

      http://www.lilyfieldlife.com/

      for shabby chic style furniture – great blog, lovely lady!

      Pinterest, Houzz, Mamamia (of course).

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    • DMS

      another good site is ‘The Mum Network’. It’s witty, blunt, and a bit tongue in cheek at times. A good read tho.

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  46. Louisec

    Great story about the homeless man! Homeless people are just normal people like us but they’ve had a major misfortune or illness befall them.

    I’ve been thinking so much about my life…… I seem to have been aimless the past few years since I lost my home and my little soul mate…. It’s time to get focused and back to it, I’m so lucky that I have a great profession and have achieved considerable success.

    The main thing that has lead me to this is reading the most fantastic blog I’ve ever read – Bumpy Road to Bubba – which I (of course) found out about on here. It’s written by a really wonderful woman, single mother with two furr kids and the most beautiful baby girl.

    You have to get on there and read it – it’s funny, sad, beautifully written, and inspiring. http://bumpyroadtobubba.com/

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  47. kto

    OMG pick me, pick me! I’m not a huge commenter but read seriously EVERY story on my beloved Mamamia and would love to find out more about being a community moderator!

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  48. ameliastclair

    I’d love to be considered as a community moderator xx

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  49. Anna

    I’d like to be a community moderator!

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  50. Spoonerist

    I would love some wedding advice…

    My fiance and I are starting to plan our wedding and because big formal affairs aren’t our thing, we’re looking at having a big backyard party with lots of friends, family and fairy lights. We’re keeping everything casual and don’t want to spend heaps of money on all those extras that blow out the budget.

    We don’t need a photographer to take a zillion photos of every moment – all we want is someone good with a camera to take some nice shots of us for an hour or so between the ceremony and reception, then give us the files on a thumb drive. I work with a couple of photographers (who are going to be invited to the wedding anyway) and would like to ask them, but don’t want to put them on the spot.

    Does anyone else have experience with this? How much did your wedding photographer cost you? Is it okay to ask co-workers for a quote for their professional services, hoping the amount will be small or even free? Any advice/info appreciated!

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    • Jackson

      Spoonerist,
      A lot of photographers are reluctant to photograph friends weddings, especially if that is not where they specialise. Imagine being the friend that does not deliver your dream photos.
      But, perhaps you could explain your situation to one of them and ask if they could do it as their gift to you, instead of getting a present for you.

      Also most people have fairly good digital cameras now days, tell all guests to snap away and have a computer set up somewhere at the reception and ask guest to download any photos they take before the end of the night. I am sure there will be some friends with a good eye and you will get some great shots.

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      • Spoonerist

        Jackson that hadn’t occured to me re lack of dream photos. That would be an awkward conversation :/

        Love the idea about setting up a computer – will definitely do that!

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    • Cinnamon

      Oh man we had the WORST experience with our photographer and videographer! I would say shop around and find something that suits you… also what about having some of those polaroid cameras at your wedding and having your guests snap some candid photos throughout the night?

      All I can say is spending money does not equal good photos/video :|

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      • Spoonerist

        Oh no Cinnamon what happened?

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        • Cinnamon

          Longgg story and it’s nearly 2am here so I’m off to bed but I’ll send you a reply tomorrow and tell you what happened!

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        • Cinnamon

          Hey Spoonerist… ok where to begin! Well first of all let’s talk about our videographer… my husband had the brilliant idea of giving the job to one of his colleagues who does film making on the side.. to his credit he has actually produced some great short films and has won a few awards BUT he had never done wedding videos. We had gone to see one place before my husband offered the job to him but the video we saw at this place we so ridiculous, this couple’s video they showed us had ‘sex shooter’ as it’s background song!

          Anyway husband convinced me that this guy could do it for half the price of what others would have charged us… so we paid him half the money up front and said we would pay the rest when we got the video. Over 2 years later and we are still waiting…

          Now to the photography. We went and saw 3 places before deciding on the one we went with, maybe we should have seen more but I just didn’t want to get confused so we decided to just see a few and go from there. Ended up going with a big company that has 6 photographers working with them… this was another mistake I think. If I could go back I would go with a smaller company with just 1 or 2 photographers working there.

          Anyway so we went to see this company and saw some of their example wedding albums which was all good except of course we didn’t know which one of their photographers had done the work. Plus we were limited on who was available to do our wedding so had to go with the photographer they gave us. Met up with the guy (one guy doing the photos) and well he seemed like he knew what we wanted on our day so we agreed.

          So day of the wedding…. he was meant to go to husband first and take a few quick candid shots before coming to photograph myself and bridesmaids etc gettting ready. Well he spent so much time over with my husband that he didn’t even end up getting to me! So I only have a few shots taken by my sis of me getting ready.

          Then we had to all go to my parents house for the Persian ceremony before heading to the Church. I had explained to the photographer what things to focus on at the ceremony since it’s something new for him. Well he basically just ended up doing his own thing and saying he wanted it to be ‘candid’ and took photos of things that didn’t even matter! After the ceremony my parents had some food for the guests to eat and what does the photographer do… he takes photos of people mid eating with their mouths open/full! Just crazy!

          Anyway so before we headed off to the Church we went to get some photos taken in the city. This time he focused so much on me individually that my husband has hardly any shots of himself on his own/with groomsmen and we hardly have any shots together! Oh and the photographer was so obsessed with my veil that he kept making me cover my face with it and at one point it was so windy I wanted to take it off but he was like no leave it on so in half my pics I’m holding onto my veil with dear life!

          Omg anyway so we get to the church (we had 2 cars – one for groom and groomsmen and one for bride bridesmaids) so we are having the church ceremony and walk out and see that our car (bride’s) has been broken into! my sister had left her purse in there so she ran to find out what happened and well you know how most people take photos outside of the church after they get married well that didn’t happen for us either… the photographer literally ran to the car and started taking photos of the broken window instead of taking photos of us! I mean I was worried about what happened with the car too but other people were handling it and didn’t want to stress us out so this idiot just made it worse!

          Anyway you get the point… the kicker then came when they sent us the photos to choose from. I think we had over 1000 photos or more (can’t remember exactly) but I’d say out of that 1000 only about 100 were remotely useable! I mean they sent us the photos of people with food in their mouths and mid eating, one of my uncle after the ceremony at my parent’s house slumped on the couch lol! Oh and not to mention the broken car window photos! I lost my shit at them over the phone and say why would you think I’d want this in my wedding album! and her reply was “it was part of the memory of the day” WTF!

          Anyway after finally choosing the somewhat decent photos we waited on their proposal for the wedding album layout…. I think my 3 year old niece could have done a better job! It was just ridiculousI didn’t know whether to laugh or cry! Luckily husband is great creatively and HE stayed up night after night working on the layout of the album…. so we paid them for something husband did himself!

          We ended up getting our album a year after the wedding and now it’s on the other side of the world sitting in my parent’s house…. Uhhh so yeh not the best outcome but in the end thanks to husband the album did look pretty good. Just a shame that we didn’t get to capture all that we wanted to on the day!

          Sorry for the extra long reply!

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          • Spoonerist

            Omg Cinnamon that is extreme. That guy sounds soooo unprofessional! What a pity!
            And that videographer sounds like a total slacker. How uncomfortable.
            But thank you for sharing your story – all knowledge is power, including the what-not-do-do and who-not-to-hire!

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    • Lolly

      As someone who does cakes for friends celebrations I am usually happy (for a good friend) to make their cake in lieu of giving a gift. If someone who is an acquaintance or a work colleague I don’t mind them asking me for a quote for a cake but I feel awkward about setting a price as I find people are expecting me to charge practically nothing for my time because they know me. I’m not willing though to give up a day and a half of my time (more if it’s a big wedding cake!) though for loose change for someone I’m not close to, fancy decorated cakes take a big chunk of time to do. However, if you are only expecting them to take the photos for an hour, they will be at the event anyway and hand them over without the need to do any touch ups etc. then I think it’s ok to ask if they are willing to do it and if they are friends with you I’d imagine they wouldn’t charge much, if anything.

      I agree with Jackson though that for weddings the pressure is huge to get these things perfect as you don’t want to let your friend down on their special day! For that reason wedding cakes are reserved only for my very, very best friends!

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      • Spoonerist

        Thanks for your reply Lolly – good to get the perspective of someone who does this sort of thing.

        I wouldn’t need them to do any touch ups so it really would be an hour. And my fiance and I are pretty casual so hopefully wouldn’t get hung up on getting ‘perfect’ pictures – I just want a few with us and my family in good lighting and without our heads chopped off!

        I’m guite good friends with one of the work photographers so might just level with her and ask for a quote. I’m definitely happy to spend a token amount of $100 or so – I just don’t want to end up spending hundreds.

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    • oddsocks

      I have a few friends who are hoby photographers but are actually pretty good. Many of them LOVE it and have more equipment and passion than professional photographers. They are also keen for any chance to practice their skills. My friend loves a forum called DSLRusers (google that) and you could potentially start a post on their asking if anyone would like to practice their skills on your wedding for free/small amount. Obviously it’s a gamble, but it could work out!

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      • Spoonerist

        Great idea Oddsocks – I’ll definitely look into it.

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