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Screen shot 2012 01 18 at 10.20.45 AM1 380x507 Open post of the week (Jan 18)

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Hi Honey, I’m ho-ome. Back in the office after three weeks holiday and life is good. Did you get a break? We were away at the beach with friends down the road and I knew I was relaxed when on about day 2 or 3, I completely lost track of time and days of the week.  That, to me, is the definition of holiday.

The kids took a little longer to slide into holiday mode. My 6yo daughter – on the second day when I suggested we go to the beach was perplexed.

“AGAIN? But we’ve already BEEN to the beach!”

We had to work a little on expectations. I’m not one for lots of outings and adventures on holidays. I’m one for lots of time at home and mellowing out at the beach. But the ages of our kids (3, 6 & 14) worked particularly well this year – probably because everyone could independently operate an iPad. Helpful when Mummy is engrossed in How To Be A Woman by Caitlin Moran which has changed and crystalised the way I think about too many things to list in one post.

caitrina moran Open post of the week (Jan 18)

How To Be a Woman

I got to the end of this book and went straight back to the beginning. I’m now reading it for the 3rd time. Soon, I will know it by heart. Run don’t walk if you haven’t read it already. It’s FUNNY and smart and should be compulsory reading for anyone with a vagina.

It’s my third day back in the office and I’m easing the transition from play to work by dressing in beach-mode. This is confusing my brain a wee bit but proving wildly entertaining for the MM Team who are amused by the brightly coloured parrot who is sitting at my desk, trying to remember how to multitask (you can see some examples in the MM Weekly gallery at the bottom of this post).

I’m quite enjoying not being able to do so many things at once. This go-slow brain thing is working for me, to be honest. I have no idea how I used to manage having 15 applications open on my desktop, toggling between 10 different website tabs and twitter and the back and front ends of MM.

How did I do that again? Oh well, it’s gone now. I’ll just focus on getting through the day without an afternoon nap.

One of my favourite things to do is paint my kids’ toenails – my daughter AND my son. Why the hell not? I’m a bit in love with this hilarious concept of male nail polish. Or Mail-Polish as it’s called.

alphanail Open post of the week (Jan 18)

Alphanail

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Nail polish brand Alphanail has launched a range that’s just for males, with the tag line “Designed for men. Worn by warriors.”

The range features metallics, blacks and greys with names such as Cocaine, Gasoline and Burnin’ Rubber, and come as a click pen applicator so men don’t have to deal with “dainty little brushes and girly nail polish containers”.

Those at Alphanail reckon men will appear more masculine wearing ‘nail armour’ and even be more attractive to women. They also believe that “no self respecting man should ever have to buy cotton balls”, so they also sell nail-polish removing wipes in a manly, gun-metal tin.

And from the ridiculous to the sublime, check out this stunning album created by Josh and his sister Grace, which they originally uploaded here. It’s self-explanatory, really. Have a look…

 

And finally, take a look at what’s been happening around the office this week…

The editorial team got together for another photo. Not as much tilted head this time. Always a good thing.

What’s on your mind?

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239 Comments so far

  1. GD Star Rating
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    LM

    Mia, I’ve checked back a few times and unless I’ve missed it, you haven’t responded to a few questions regarding the labels in the outfit above. Feel a bit disappointed really…….

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      Mia

      Sorry – past couple of days been nuts. Read the “I’m moving” post from today for details about THAT.
      Will get to it now!

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    Eloise

    Hi all. I need to choose a book for our book group’s next round. We have had some very heavy and kinda depressing books lately … any suggestions as to what I can suggest that would actually be a bit uplifting??

    Thanks!!

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      Mia

      Catilin MOran’s How To Be A Woman.
      It’s hilarious but SMART and will give you SOOOOOO much to talk about.

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    Anonymous

    Mia, you don’t look very happy with that smoothie. So, why do you have it??

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      Mia

      Usually I love it. But that day I put too much kale in it and it tasted like carpet.

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    vness

    Lovin’ the bright wardrobe Mia!

    Also read your article on Borneo in Open Road the other day, sounds like a great place to visit and loved the pic of you with your kaftan, gorgeous!

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    prettygeeky

    Hi Mia, just wondering what container you keep your green smoothies in? I have had trouble finding one I am happy with.

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      Mia

      My sister-in-law Nicky got me the one in this photo. And I got another one at a health food store. They’re both insulated. Helps.

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    ParisChic

    Does anyone have any experience with Camper shoes?
    I’m usually a size 39 and bought some boots. They feel too tight (ie I want more room to wriggle my toes – not length-wise) but they are beautiful and I love them and I don’t want to take them back. Could the leather give?? There is not a size 40 in France, England or Spain left so it’s tight boots or no boots.

    Also I joined the 12wbt. Let’s see what happens!

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      Anonymous

      They should stretch :)

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      rainbow

      wear them around the house with thick socks on and they will stretch out.

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    Anonymous

    My 22 year old sister is struggling with severe anxiety/depression and is now quite suicidal. We are wondering if a hospital stay might help her? We live in the Southern Highlands so it would need to be a hospital either in Sydney or Canberra. Can anyone recommend a good private hospital that might be able to help her? Or is it better for her to avoid hospital and stay with us?

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      rainbow

      i don’t know your area at all but could you take her an emergency department where she could at least be assessed?

      is she medicated? if not get her into her GP ASAP.

      good-luck and take care of yourself too x

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      chef

      First stop needs to be your/her GP. If the situation is very urgent, your best bet is local hospital emergency room or CAT (crisis assessment team). You will get nowhere without a referral from someone. You will need to be very persistent because the whole mental health system is horribly inadequate and understaffed. I wish you the best in this difficult situation.

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      Sparrow

      As others have suggested, she will need to see a GP or a psychiatrist for a referral to a private hospital, but I can recommend the excellent St John of God in Burwood. http://www.sjog.org.au/hospitals/burwood.aspx They deal especially well with anxiety and depression. Wishing her all the best – it’s a frightening time for everyone, but please do remind her that although she feels terrible at the moment, she will recover and get back to normal soon.

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        Anonymous

        Yes I have heard good things about St John of God – there are a few I think? My mum used to work there

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        Anonymous

        Thankyou for all your replies! :)

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    katiegirl

    Where are Mias fabulous shoes from – the ones worn on Today?

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      Mia

      Annoyingly – they’re from a little boutique in Terrigal on the central coast. They cost $40 and have no label!

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    missneriss

    My mum is not far from landing in Amsterdam as I write this. Couple of hours and I get to give her a giant hug, I can’t wait.

    It’s her first time outside Australia and bless her heart she’s flying alone, via Dubai, to Amsterdam, without a cigarette for a full day and she’s terrified of flying. I couldn’t be more proud of her. It’s one of the biggest steps she has ever taken in her entire life.

    She’ll be here for three and a half months and will be with me when I give birth in a couple of weeks (couple of weeks! OMG how exciting!) and afterwards. It will be lovely of course, but she likes a good argument. And by argument I mean self righteous, finger-pointing fight. And it doesn’t really help that I won’t fight back… I’m hoping that throwing a grandchild into the mix will make things a little easier on us both.

    My poor husband, having to live with his MIL for such a long time. The man is my hero.

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      JanelleC68

      Oh missneriss, have an awesome time with your Mum, and best of luck for the birth. I hope your baby is healthy, and a good sleeper is a total bonus.

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      Susan As Well

      Your mum sounds wonderful getting on that plane to be with you!

      Am really looking forward to your baby coming too and only a couple of weeks to go so lots of luck and don’t forget to breathe x

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      chef

      Couple of weeks! Such an exciting time. Looking forward to reading your news. Give your mum a big kiss and a cigarette (not necessarily in that order). x

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    eternally

    Hope I’m not too late & some people are still around…
    My friend wants games at her baby shower. I didn’t have any at mine.
    Need some ideas, preferably nothing gross (like eating peanut butter out of a nappy)

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      missneriss

      That’s a real game? Gross! My baby shower is at the weekend, I’ll puke if they try to get me to do that!

      Isn’t there some game where you have to multitask? Like change a nappy while on the phone and cooking dinner (can you tell I’ve never been to a baby shower)?

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      Rabbitsal

      Ask everyone to bring a pic of themselves as a baby, put them up on the wall next to a list of guests & you have to match guest names to the baby pic. Another good one is baby themed trivia: biggest baby ever born, most children born to one woman, name all Brangelina’s kids etc.

      have fun!

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      aleous

      I have my baby shower coming up in a couple of weeks and my mother-in-law is planning LOTS of games. Here’s a few of the ones I can think of…..

      * Celebrity baby/child name game – have a list of about 20 or so celebrities and everyone has to name their kids and the person who gets the most right answers wins (eg: With Brad and Angelina there’s already 6 kids names to guess right there).

      * A guessing competition is always nice and easy – for a baby shower you could fill up a big baby bottle with jelly babies and everyone guesses how many are in there and the one who guesses the closest number wins a prize (usually the jar/bottle full of lollies). They sell large baby bottles that are actually money boxes at The Reject Shop and other cheapie shops.

      * Who’s baby is born first – for this one you need tiny baby dolls (available on ebay) and you freeze them into ice cubes. Everyone has one in their drink and the person who’s baby is ‘born’ (comes out of the ice cube) first is the winner.

      If you do a quick search of ebay for baby shower games there’s quite a few things you can buy like baby bingo and tickets for a lucky door prize.

      Also the Reject Shop sell a lot of things for baby showers at quite reasonable prices – from the invitations, to props for games, to banners and balloons for decorations on the day.

      I hope that helps =)

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      eternally

      Thanks heaps for the suggestions, will use them.

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      Rach

      Freeze jelly babies in glasses of water and the first person to ‘give birth’ ie have the ice melt and get their baby out wins a prize. Quite amusing to see the methods people will use to give birth. No technology allowed to help (microwave)

      Guess the girth of the mums belly – cut some wool to the length you reckon is the size of the mum’s belly

      Not eating the peanut butter out of the nappy, but melt different chocolate bars in the nappy and you have to guess which kind of chocolate.

      I got these off the net when I did my friend’s shower. There are heaps more suggestions online.

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    Bel

    Black is my colour choice for fashion. Would I be able to work at MM.

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    essessesse

    Nail varnish for men? Dearie me.

    I had a lovely holiday and was distressed to return to work. I loved the whole not knowing what day of the week it was thing. I decided after Christmas that I was getting lardy and as a result have have five – yes five – trips to my new personal trainer in the last two weeks. I am in a world of pain but I’m sure things will get better.

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    georgiepie

    love josh and grace – made me a little teary! hahaha lana and lucy, I feel your pain. family likes the air con on full, but it is directly above my study desk…brrrrrrr.

    OMM- bought a kindle and I LOVE IT. BEST THING IN THE WORLD! I just bought about 30 classic books, all for free! and 15 trashy chick lit. That’s already validated the $130 I spent on the kindle itself. brb, off to devour novel after novel

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    Anonymous

    Josh and Grace are fantastic – well done!

    OMM – third day back at work after three weeks holiday and really tough to get into it (especially the work wardrobe, wish I could do holiday clothes for the office..). But sun is shining and only two days until the weekend so overall life is pretty great!

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    Tessy

    I don’t know if anyone else may agree with me, but I feel like I am seeing a lot of old posts being re-hashed but with different titles. I open it up and then find I’m reading something I’ve read before. Also would like to see a bit more diversity in posts, I know MM caters to many but I feel that I can’t read another “body image, vaccination, motherhood” without feeling like it was just in yesterdays top stories. Don’t get me wrong I love MM, but I feel like I miss some good stories because they don’t stay up on the home page long enough.

    Other than that, just moved to Perth from Melb and loving the hot weather!

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    maybedaisy

    Had to share this with everyone, care of the Princes Freeway.

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      Joanne

      Oh dear.

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      MissT

      Hilarious!

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      Kate

      The irony of placement…

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      JMUM

      LOL! I see those billboards every day on the way to pick up my daughter from my mother in laws house. I was just saying to my husband last week, that I think Daddy is at Spearmint Rhino.

      How silly is that positioning?

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      MissV

      hehe I’ve driven past a couple of times in the past week and it still makes me giggle!

  17. GD Star Rating
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    Anonymous

    I’m 25 and I definitely don’t want kids (don’t tell me I will change my mind, it’s offensive) and I want to find someone who would consider letting me go through with getting sterilised but don’t know where to start looking

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      essessesse

      You will not find it easy because of your age and because you do not have children. I wouldn’t tell you that you will change your mind but I will tell you that the reason doctors are reluctant to perform sterilisations on young childless women – and those with children – is that so many of them do change their minds. Reversal is not guaranteed.

      If I were you my first step would be an appointment with my GP, then ask for a referral to a counsellor or psychologist. That way you can talk over your decision with them and maybe ask them for a letter of support. This shows that you’re serious.

      Good luck.

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      Anonymous

      I also won’t tell you to change your mind about this … but it never hurts to keep your options open. There are plenty of ways to prevent pregnancies that aren’t permanent and you should definitely discuss those with your doctor.

      My sister also swore she would never have children. Got married at 26 and one of the conditions he had to accept was that she would not have kids. Now, at 40, she’s pregnant and very happy to be.

      You just don’t know where life might lead you. Good luck wherever that may be!

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      genna

      I have no personal experience in this, but I reckon you might find it rather difficult. I’d do what essessesse suggested.

      After my mum had her third child she wanted her tubes tied. Numerous doctors refused to do it. They said she was too young to make such a huge decision (she was 28…). They also said she would need ‘permission’ from her husband… This was in 1991…

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      rainbow

      i would start with a family planning clinic. start with a long term contraceptive like an IUD, that means you won’t fall pregnant, then wait out til you reach what is considered the appropriate age, whatever that may be.

      i think going on official record somewhere is important.

      good-luck. i think some people just know.

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    Clare M

    What’s so hilarious about a company that names its product cocaine?

    Do I just have my cranky pants on? Seems poor taste to me.

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    Sally

    Hey everyone, I have a quick question: when getting the medicare covered psychology sessions, do you have to have a GP refer you with a disorder? Or can you go straight to the psych, have them diagnose you and then get the sessions covered? Thanks :)

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      Donna M

      You have to have a mental health assesment done by a dr qualified to do so. Think they all can but at my dr surgery they had a dr who specialised in these assesments. It has to done thru the dr first to get the referral and the medicare code so it can be claimed accordingly. You usually get between 8-12 sessions heavily subsidised for a 12 month period but I also think you may be able to have that reviewed for further sessions. This is how I remeber it being anyway.

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        Donna M

        forgot to mention, the medicare code is put through the medicare database so it is all there in the system when you claim. Its not just a matter of having the paperwork. i think people may have tried to rort the system and that is why it is all done internally now.

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      Anonymous

      Need a GP to set up a mental health care plan and send that with a referral to the psychologist before you can claim.

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        Sally

        Ok thanks very much :)

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      Astrid

      Hi,
      GP first & then they refer you to the psych.
      Lots of paperwork needed by Medicare and the GP needs to complete this before referring so you get the rebate.

      Good luck :)

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      Anon for this

      Check with your GP about what is current…. but I know a couple of years ago when I sought help through this system my GP advised me against as it becomes recorded against you in a register that has the potential to be used by health insurance/life insurance companies etc in the future. It is not what it is supposed to be used for but she warned me of the possibilities.

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        Neola

        whoah – that’s terrible if that’s the case!

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    Jane

    How GREAT is that Josh and Grace video!

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    Valentina

    I bought the Caitlin Moran book after reading your recommendation, and read it in a day! It’s brilliant. So many ver important topics covered in an extremely witty way. The words sing off the page. I’ll re read it, once my children are interested in the iPad again! Thanks Mia.

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    oliveblanche

    OMM: my little nephews ages 7 and 8 seem to be growing up so so fast! They are very cute boys and are going to be total heartbreakers when they grow up. The 7 yr old is already chatting up girls. He is very very charming- it’s adorable and terrifying. The 8 yr old is already very good looking and it is scary to see the amount of girls that flock around him but is a bit shy around them. They seem so much older than I was at that age. I have been getting as many cuddles as possible because soon they won’t want to hang around there boring Aunt. ;p I just wish they would stay little innocent boys for as long as they can and not hurry to grow up. Ah I’m only their aunt so imagine how their mum feels! She and I joke that they are going to have to continue to believe in Santa as to not ruin our Xmas! Ok kinda joke ;)  

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    Jen

    Omm At work at the moment, trying hard not to hand in my resignation. I work in child care, love the children, but the internal politics are driving me insane.

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      Joanne

      Unfortunately working with so many other women (and occasionally men) this often happens in early education… but there are brilliant staff teams out there!! If it’s something you can do, then resign. Work casually for a while within a few different organisations and see which services you like best, and why you like them. Then, when you apply for your next job you’ll know what things you’re looking for. Good luck!!

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    Also Anon

    I need the MM help too…
    OMM – Babies and how to get one to start growing in my belly.
    We have been trying for 5 months now. Anyone got any advice? I know its not that long on the TTC “journey” and I know some people try for years, but Im just wondering if we should amp up our approach to it all yet?
    If so what’s the first step? Getting Mr AA’s sperm tested? Where? (Im in Syd, and we only have basic private health insurance). Do I just send him to the GP and get a referral?
    And for me? Any tips from people who needed a little helping hand? I know we could easily have nothing wrong, but it starts to eat away at you every month. Im sure some people can relate.
    In every way I seem health enough (healthy BMI, non smoker etc) and Im 31…
    Any wisdom from the MMers is much appreciated!

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      Anonymous

      First of all don’t stress! 5 months is not long at all! I would suggest making an appointment with your GP and discussing..but these things have helped me..
      Seeing a naturopath..I recommend..http://www.tonicaustralia.com.au
      Acupuncture http://www.acupunctureivf.com.au/

      Staying calm, trying not to think too much about it and having fun trying to conceive

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      Bryter

      My advice is to take charge of your fertility and know when you’re ovulating. Buy Clearblue ovulation sticks with the happy face. We had been “trying” for a year, but it wasn’t until I used the sticks that I discovered that I’d been ovulating much later in my cycle. So we’d been having sex at the wrong time for a year. Once we knew my ovulation day (happy face!), we had sex a few times for the next 48 hours. We could also then have a better idea of when I’d be ovulating for the next six months (use an online ovulation calculator for this – just know your cycle length, etc). On our third month of using the sticks, I fell pregnant. They’ve also worked for many friends of mine.

      In addition to this, send your hubby to the GP for a sperm test. And visit your OB for an ultrasound to check you are ovulating, don’t have cysts, etc.

      Good luck!

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      LBD

      hi, it is hard when you are trying and its not happening, many of us have been there. I used an ovulation test kit to help me work out my cycle better and it must have worked because after 6 months or trying we got pregnant the next month. It works by telling you when exactly you are ovulating, just a pee stick like a pregnancy test but you pee on it every day around when you think you are due to ovulate & it identifies for you when exactly you are. All the info says women ovulate on day 14 of their cycle (that is day 14 after your period begins) but for me it was day 21 as in fact I had a 5 week cycle, not a 4 week one. You can simple buy the kits from the chemist. Give it a go, worth a try I would suggest.
      Good luck.
      From this Mum of 2 little people who are my world and often the terrorists of my sleep, or lack of it!

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      Lu

      How well do you know your cycle? Its important to know exactly when you’re ovulating and that is determined by how long your cycle is. Get a book on it, that helped me. The guide is you ovulate 14 days before your period, so if you have a longer than usual cycle you will likely be ovulating later than you think you are. I thought it was 14 days after the end not 14 days before the start, which is tricky because if you are irregular you may not know until after its happened so start charting. Once I sorted that out it happened quickly.

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        Also Anon

        Thanks guys….

        I have done some Ovulation tests, and my cycle is super regular so Im pretty sure we are getting it on, so to speak, at the right time.
        I know I sound a bit paranoid but its hard not to be. Esp as all I hear are stories of people getting pregnant first go. Good to know not everyone falls the moment they think about having a baby.
        If it doesnt happen this month Ill send Mr AA to the GP and go from there.

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          Me

          It took us six months first go – I was so over all the usual things that I went with a friends recommendation of sex everyday, same time, missionary position, for 12 days from day 9…nearly killed us out of boredom, but worked! With #2, three months of ‘trying’ with no success, I said bugger this and we still the 12 day straight thing again…worked and am due in 7 weeks!!! Good luck…bodies are weird, sometimes we are not textbook. I still think I ovulate late in my cycle but when I did the sticks I was all over the place so they didn’t work for us…

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            Jo

            I am not able to conceive naturally and had 2 miscarriages on IVF before joining the adoption waitlist. My advice is to see your HP and both of you get checked out ASAP. I was told earlier detection of the problems I didn’t know I had would have increased the success of IVF.

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      Mama carol

      I can recommend acupuncture, which along with the Chinese herbs they give you, can change your life! I had two healthy kids then a miscarriage and couldn’t fall pregnant at all. Within weeks of acupuncture and herbs I fell pregnant with my daughter. Also try not to stress or try too hard – each of my 3 successful pregnancies were at times I didn’t think it would happen (read: doing it just for fun). Best of luck!!

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      Anonymous

      Acupuncture definitely worked for us! We had our first child no problem, then could not get pregnant, did tests, I had PCOS and he a low sperm count…booked in for ivf and did acupuncture while waiting, was pregnant within 2 weeks…! Also used the ovulation tests and had masses of sex over two days when ovulating. Try this link http://www.pregnancy-tests.com.au/ for good quality but very reasonable packs of ovulation tests. Good luck!

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      rainbow

      read about vaginal mucous, sorry if TMI.

      this worked for me. cheaper than ov sticks!

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      feistyangel

      I have no tips as we are TTC (trying to conceive) as well. But with your health insurance there is a 12month waiting period with all health insurers if you want to be able to claim for any pregnancy related services or if you do need medical help to get pregnant. Just something to keep in mind.

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    Anon for this one!

    Hey everyone!
    I could really use your advice! How long would you say is too long for a one yr old to go with out a bath? I ask this cos I know someone who doesn’t bathe their one yr old daughter often. She is in the same grubby singlet she was in on Sunday. The kid is so sweet and lovely. I just feel she isn’t getting what she deserves. To be clean and smell nice. I worry that she is going to get rejected because she smells and that she is going to get bad nappy rash from not being washed. I honestly have no idea what to do. I mean is it even my place to say anything or express concern? I know she is fed well and has all her other needs met. Well mostly. She is desperate for a friend and is put in front of the tv all day. It would be nice to see her parents buy her shoes and let her play in the yard or do some activities with her. I know I may come across as extremely judgmental and I am not a parent so I can only go off what I know other parents do. And the ones that I know bathe their kids every night, don’t keep them cooped up all day inside, get them involved in play groups or kindy or organize play dates. I’m not going to say how I know any of this stuff for the same reason I am anon for this. I’m really conflicted! Any suggestions???!! Thanks everyone! And please do tell me if I’m being over the top or interfering cos I am so confused!

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      Anonymous

      No, you’re not over the top or interfering.

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      marijana

      I almost had to cry when I read this. Just makes me feel very sad to hear that some kids seem to not get enough attention or seem neglected. Ok I don’t know the full story, and also I have no idea what I would do if I would notice something like that.

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      Anonymous

      Hi, after reading your post i do not think you are over reacting. I am a social worker and work directly with families whose children may be at risk of neglect or abuse. If you don’t feel confident in addressing your concerns directly with the family you could look at contacting local family/welfare services to seek some advice. It might be appropriate to refer the family to a service who could help address the specific parenting issues. The wellbeing of the child is paramount!!

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      Nora

      I’d say bathing once a day is standard in most households. It sound’s like your friend may have some parenting issues to deal with.

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      carolinehutchison

      not your place to say anything. What you can do though is offer to babysit. for the parents, it would give them a break and you could do fun things with her like give her a bath and read her a story or even take her to the park.

      You don’t know whatt’s going on behind those doors so offering to help is the best thing you can do for her and her parents.

      BTW one year olds are pretty grubby, it may be a clean one every day.

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        Nora

        See I kind of feel the “not your place to say anything” response is exactly how children at risk remain so. May I ask why you feel it’s best ignored?

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          carolinehutchison

          Nora I didn’t say ignore, I said help. We don’t know the circumstances of this family, and this site is very much about not judging others, but seeking to understand. If the author offers to help the family by giving the girl some attention and the parents a break, the mother may choose to open up and share some of her worries.

          Marching in and saying she feels the child is at risk or that the author is concerned is likely to antagonise the parents and they will feel judged.

          Clearly the author has seen the child twice this week, so i assume sees them reasonably often, and an offer to take her to the park or to babysit could make a difference to the family in a nice way, not a judgy way.

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            rainbow

            great advice! offering to help will also allow you to make a more educated assessment. a grotty kid in a loving home is better than a clean on in an unloved home

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      Katyberry

      I guess it’s a pattern of behaviour that you are looking at, but I am pretty slack at bathing my girls. A couple of times a week. I’m also pretty crap at brushing hair. Although they do change their clothes. And I don’t think anyone is going to argue that my children aren’t well taken care of as a result.

      Bathing, in and of itself, I don’t think would be a very good indicator of the care the children are getting. More concerning would be getting out and about and doing things like interacting with other children (they really don’t make “friends” at that age), playing at a playground, expressing themselves through art.

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        Sydgrl

        sorry but bathing them a couple of times a week is not good enough. I think most people would definitely say that they’re being neglected. People feel awful, especially in this weather, if they don’t bath/shower at least once a day. Let alone the smell. Children and adults feel infinitely better having a bath/shower. And what does it take, 10 minutes a day to bath them?!

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          Emmeline

          I agree. A couple of times a week is not enough. I have a friend who bathes her 16mth old boy twice a day which I sometimes think is an overkill but once a day is the minimum.

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          JosieY

          Both my kids bathe on average three times a week. They are fine. Just saying!

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          eternally

          Only bathing every second day was recommended by our MCHN for dry skin. More bathing strips away the natural oils. I think it depends on the individual kid, and in itself is not worth judging over. If part of a pattern of broader concerns, maybe.

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          Tripitaka

          Some children hate baths so much that anything more than a couple of times a week becomes incredibly stressful for the parents as well as the children.

          My kids at the moment have a bath usually once a day, but there have been periods in both their lives when it has been less than this, as sometimes the pros just don’t outway the cons. Clean hands, faces and bottoms are very important, but all this can be done without an actual bath/shower.

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          rainbow

          i don’t agree. we have weeks where we are very slack with bathing. they get bathed of course but if we come home late after being out at a party then we don’t rush home to throw them in the bath. in winter when they don’t sweat and their feet don’t touch the ground we are also the same.

          i think it could be worse living in households where certain things MUST happen, for sometimes no reason eg. a daily bath!

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        carolinehutchison

        Katyberry nothing wrong with bathing your girls a couple of times a week. Kids get their bottoms wiped at nappy change time, and their hands and faces washed during the day. Those who are so focussed on how often other people’s children are bathed need better things to do!

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      Laws for Clouds

      If you can get a close look at the clothes, look at the singlet. Is it grubby or are they stains? Baby food is pretty hard to get out. How do the parents seem? Maybe mum is pregnant again or someone is sick? Playgroups are often shut down over summer, did they go before?

      The big question is, how long has it been going on? A few weeks, wait until things go back to normal in February and see if the kid gets out and about, if she doesn’t, I think there’s concern.

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      Louisec

      I think it’s great that you are concerned – so many, too many, people put their heads in the sand. We all have to look out for children that may be neglected, pets too. Or else who is going to help them?

      If you are close to the parents discuss it with the mother. Tell her you’re concerned.

      You are doing the right thing, I wish more people would be like this it would really make a difference. Children need our protection.

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    Profiterole

    I made me a Tumblr. It has one picture of my lovely doggie.
    I am a bit excited to document the progress of my basil seedlings, on the interwebs.
    Gosh my world is so exciting!

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    Tea

    OMM (please excuse superficial-ness of this post): I recently had a pedicure while on holidays in Asia and I am addicted. I don’t want to paint my own toes!! Can anyone recommend a cheap salon in inner-Sydney? I’m terrified of contracting some incurable fungus and this fear is currently outweighing my refusal to paint my own toes :P

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      elle

      I am addicted to pedicures & manicures! AVOID any of the cheap Vietnamese salons (american nails, california nails, professionail etc). Had SO many bad experiences and they pay their staff appallingly..

      These places are great..

      Sayoko Shizu at John Azzi opp Westfield CBD
      0432420044 http://www.wix.com/sayokoshizu/1#!

      Express Beauty Bar in Grace Hotel CBD
      (02) 9299 9414

      Endota Spa Martin Place (more $$$) (02) 9231 6556

      Nail Boutique Le M Dymocks Building CBD (02) 9232 0092

      Nails Nails in Rozelle 02 9810 6329

      Nature’s Energy Glebe 02 9555 5533

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      Mrs H

      DONT DO IT -PAINT YOUR OWN TOES!!!
      I used to go to those places (cheap main/pedi) all the time, and started to get disgusting peely and itchy skin on my toes and feet.
      My doctor said that since these places have become common, she has seen an increase in fungal foot infections which beggars belief.
      I had my last one about 12 months ago, and looked around at the LACK OF HYGENIC STANDARDS – and it made my gag and vow never to do it again.
      There were people with infected toes and feet, and the workers would just use razors and pokey kind of steel things, and then just put them in a jar, and use them on the next person – without even wiping them at all.
      I had acrylic nails for 3 years, (infils every 3 weeks) so I went to many many of these nail bars and they are all the same.
      AVOID AT ALL COSTS – bend down and paint your own nails and save yourself, at a minimum a disgustingly gross fungal infection – at worst, the loss of a nail..eerrggghhhh

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    MissT

    Spent most of today convinced it was Thursday. So upset.

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      Profiterole

      What!? It isn’t?

      Oh no….

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        Rach

        Ha, it’s still Tuesday here!

        Bah, humbug.

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          N

          Yep we are living in the past Rach lol!

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    sarah

    Beautiful gallery..

    OMM
    Really struggling this week and need some support/advice!
    i suffer with anxiety/depression issues and have been particularly bad of late since uni finished in late November. Have been living with mum at home but she is now moving for her new job and wants me to find a place to live independently as she says its too stressful living with me. I am incredibly anxious about this as I am already struggling to cope and just don’t think I could manage living alone. I was hoping I could stay with my father until I felt strong enough to move out but his new wife says she couldnt possibly cope with me staying longer than 2 weeks and she ‘might get stressed and ill being around someone with depression’. I am hurt and angry at my father that he accepts this when I desperately need his support and feel that his wife is incredibly selfish and obviously does not care about me. So I am faced with being homeless from this weekend, have been having panic attacks daily, crying constantly and seriously thinking whats the point and having serious suicidal thoughts. I keep thinking whats the point of living when my parents do not seem to really love me and support me and be there for me no matter what? I feel so abandoned and hurt that my father would want to be married to someone like that and why he doesnt prioritise his children & be there for me when I so desperately need him..

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      melissasavage

      Oh Sarah, that’s really rough. Do you have a friend you can crash with for a while? I would also get in touch with the accommodation office at your uni to see what’s available and maybe try to hook up with some housemates. There may even be some residence accommodation if you are lucky. While you are doing that get to the doctor and your psych as soon as possible to help you through.

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      Tea

      Hi Sarah,

      I’m so sorry to hear what you have been going through. Housing issues are so awful and I can’t imagine dealing with that on top of anxiety and depression. Perhaps you could try sitting down with your father (with a psychologist?) to talk to him about how you are feeling and why you need his support? Or ask your mum to chat to him about your situation if that’s an option? I completely understand why you feel so abandoned and the behaviour of his wife is awful. If that doesn’t work you could try contacting your school or university’s counselling and housing services. They help out people in your position all the time and I’m sure that they would have plenty of resources at their fingertips to help you find a place. You could also try Kids Help Line.

      All the best xoxo

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      JosieY

      You poor thing. I would suggest you go find a bulkbilling GP and get a referral for counseling. Then you could try centrelink for help with accommodation. Unfortunately nothing can help you with killer bitch step mum. xxx

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      Louisec

      Hey Sarah, where are you now? This is a terrible time for you so take a deep breath and let’s get you some help ok? Yes it is awful that your parents are not supporting you but like all parents they’re doing the best they can. You need some good support now.

      Can you please let me know which city you live in? My email is Loumelc@hotmail.com.

      It will be ok, we will sort something out for you.

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        sarah

        Thankyou for all your replies! I am currently in Canberra. My mum is moving to Sydney. I am so grateful for your kind replies!

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          Louisec

          Sarah, when is your mum leaving? Do you have a doctor? Does he/she have you on depression medication? If not do you have a doctor you can go to? Can you let me know all these things.

          How old are you too?

          Then we can get better organised. L x

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            sarah

            thank you for your support! my mum is moving tomorrow argh! i am 21 and have been on antidepressants for years. my dad said i can stay for 2 weeks and i am really anxious about everything but maybe if i take it day by day? i am going to the doctor as soon as i can. just have a lot of anger at father’s wife and hate that right now i don’t seem to have any options but to stay there temporarily. I just struggle to stay hopeful when I’m so hurt by my parent’s actions. today i had a particually hard moment where i was in the car with my dad and he was screaming at me saying how rude and abusive and ungrateful i was that i expressed i was afraid and upset that i couldn’t live with him and that it was so conditional. It was so so awful, he was saying ‘you just want me to destroy my marriage dont you? that would make you happy!’ and ‘you just want the world to do exactly what you want!’ etc I got so upset, was crying etc because I don’t feel like I want too much. I just want love and support from my parents and a home where I can belong. Anyway I don’t know.

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              Louisec

              You’re going through a lot, and I’m not a professional, but it seems as though the antidepressants you’re on aren’t working so you need to get to a doctor and have them reviewed. But it may just be the rough time you’re having, a doctor will know.

              So you’re still at uni? If so I gather you can’t afford to pay much rent. Would you feel comfortable living in a share situation with maybe some nice girls your age?

              If so you could spend the two weeks at your dads looking for a good share house. It would be great to have a nice home of your own with some friends.

              WHen I was going thru really rough time, which included being homeless, I kept telling myself it’s going to be ok, this is only temporary. Please try to do this and practice staying calm it is possible. It sounds as though it’s better for you to find a nice share home than live at your dads. Maybe once you’ve moved in somewhere take a break from him for a while and focus on your own life.

              Let me know re the above. L xxx

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              Louisec

              Sarah, are you back at uni this year? Is there accommodation at the uni?

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              sarah

              thank-you Louisec! i really appreciate the support! im now at dad’s and its uncomfortable/awkward with his wife but dad has taken 2 weeks off work to help me find somewhere to live so I guess I will take it day by day and try to be positive!

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        Beka

        This in itself is why I love this website. Asking for help and it is given. Sarah I’m sorry your family doesn’t seem to be there for you when you need them most. I’m in western Australia but sending you heaps of well wishes and happy thoughts that things work out.

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      flyaway kite

      Hi Sarah
      Sounds like you’re in a pretty shitty spot.
      Housing problems + family problems can definitely constitute a mini breakdown, no doubt about it. Remember that you’re not alone- you’re not the first nor the last to be in this hole. When I opened up to my friends about an issue similar to this I was quite surprised at how downright supportive they were (I honestly thought that they wouldn’t have a clue!)
      Anyway…
      If it’s looking really desperate maybe try to take a birds eye view of the situation and see what practical things you can to to make things better.
      I’d suggest having a look at Gumtree, there’s usually pretty cheap n cheerful accommodation available there.

      You never know, this could be a blessing in disguise?
      Good luck.

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    Anonymous

    OMM: Ithaca Creek state school vs. Oakleigh state school. Any advice / opinions Brisbane people? My son will be going into year 2. We live just down the street from Oakleigh but we really, really liked Ithaca when we went for an interview. But we’re not sure if the inconvenience of the daily commute (15 mins each way) outweighs that. Help!

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      Rick Morton

      I used to work for Education in Queensland and Ithaca is a brilliant school!

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      Me Myself I

      I drive my son to school 20 mins each way as it is the best boys school in this city. You do what you have to do to get them the best education and buses aren’t an option as we aren’t on a bus route.

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      katehunter

      I live halfway between those schools and have friends with kids at both schools. Not a bad word about either. My advice? Go the closest option. We are blessed with lots of great schools in a very small area aren’t we?

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      Bunny

      Anonymous, I don’t have kids, but when I was in high school, my 3 siblings and I went to one outside our catchment area because of its reputation.

      A girl I had gone to the local primary school with also attended, so her dad used to drive us all in the morning (it was a 10-minute trip) and mum would pick us up in the afternoon and drop our friend off on the way.

      Sharing the drop-off/pick-up might be something you could consider once your son has made some friends and you get to know the parents.

      We did try public transport for a week but the bus journey was an hour by the time it got to our house!

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    kate

    I am wishing I had somewhere fun to go to work today – looking at your photos. If I have to cut up one more watermelon or make another toasted sandwich or vacuum up crumbs one more time I’m going to scream.
    It was fun for awhile – but – over it
    Welcome back Mia

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    MissV

    I wish i could dress really fun for work but unfortunately i can not :(

    Love the Josh and Grace photos. It saddens me that in this day and age we still need things like that to show that those with disabilities are still human and are just the same as “normal” people.

    OMM: I’ve been really quite lonely lately. My boyfriend works 7 days a week at the moment so i don’t have anyone to spend my weekends with (during the day) if my friends are busy with their own plans. At first it was fine but it’s been 3 months now and i’m quite lonely.

    xxxmissvxxx.wordpress.com

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    An Idle Dad

    I have a penis. Would that book interest me, or bore me shitless?

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      Susan As Well

      Hahaha … Read it and see how your penis responds?

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      rainbow

      i bet your wife would love you even more if you did.

      it is an awesome read, she is an amazing writer, i think you would enjoy it.

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      melissasavage

      I think you would enjoy it. It’s very funny and doesn’t take more than a few hours to read.

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      Mia

      Your penis would laugh and laugh. Caitlin Moran is one funnnyyyy writer.

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    LJ

    OMM – It was 25 years ago today that my beloved dad passed away. Miss him more now than ever.

    OMM – My dearest mum has just been diagnosed with aggressive lung cancer.

    Life is just a bit crap basically…… :(

    But Josh and Grace’s gallery made me smile :)

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      vegas

      So sorry to hear that LJ, sending love and strength for you and your Mum.

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      Haven Maven

      Awww LJ. Shitty day. Hugs. Hoping for the best for your mum.

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      LJ

      Thanks for the hugs uys – needed it. Feel better today xx

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    ingy

    It’s the first time I’ve seen Josh and Grace’s gallery and I thought it was wonderful.

    OMM this week is posture. I am generally quite good but when I sit down to do paperwork I find that I can slouch a little. I keep reminding myself and I am getting better but it is hard to break a bad habit. I will get there though I am sure!

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      picardie.girl

      I have postural problems when sitting too! It’s taking a long time to turn around. I have to be vigilant though as it causes (and has caused) all sorts of trouble long-term. Habits can be hard to break!

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      MissT

      I’m bollocks with my posture! I’ve been thinking of getting one of those back braces to help me sit/stand up straight. My chiropractor said it wouldn’t hurt, but might not help.

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      Susan As Well

      Best thing I found for better sitting posture at the computer was using a footrest that puts your thighs at a 90 degree angle to your torso. My back seems to fall into a naturally straight position with the lumbar curve nicely supported by a rolled up towel. You can buy adjustable footrests or use a pile of old textbooks, No more backache … aaaaaah

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    N

    Btw those teas look amazing! I love the packaging! Im sure they taste great too :)

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    Ruby

    Fashion question! Mia, this morning on the Today Show you had on a bracelet that looks like it is made from woven ribbons? I love it! Where did you find it?

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    iamevilcupcake

    About a week ago, I finally admitted out loud to myself, that I’m actually lonely. It’s really weird, when I’m home I’m fine. But when I’m at work, knowing I’m going home to no one make me sad.

    So many people ask me if I get lonely and I always say no. But it’s a big fat lie. But I can’t bear the thought of what people would say if I say I am.

    This has nothing to do with the loss of my husband and everything do with the fact I deserve a good man who actually treats me well and loves me.

    I have a lot of love to give :)

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      Haven Maven

      Nawww. Hugs to you, lil cake chick xxx

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      MissT

      You do deserve a good man! I have faith you’ll find the right one :) In the mean time, you can always hang out with me. I am on your way home after all ;)

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      ossie

      Thank you for writing this. I feel the same way. what is sadder is that I actually have two little boys that I adore and love with all my heart to go home to but I feel so very lonely.

      I hope your loneliness will end soon X

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      roserusso

      You can bug me all you like on twitter :) xxx

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      Louisec

      I know I sound like a broken record but get Louise Hay’s book, You can Heal Your life, it’s amazing. And don’t just read it but do the exercises consistently

      I learnt very recently that I can’t just stay miserable – I have to work on myself to get better. Someone I totally respect and admire told me to get Louise Hay’s book and boy am I indebted to her!

      In 1.5 months my life has totally turned around, it’s fantastic. AFter three years of absolute hell and unhappiness.

      Love has even come to me, a really lovely good man. I have so much more work to do, it doesn’t stop. you need to work on yourself and your life before you can be with a man.

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    Alexia

    I didn’t notice Josh has down syndrome until photo 7- when the caption reads ‘I have down syndrome’.

    All I saw was a regular, happy brother and sister.

    Isn’t that how it should be?

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      Sarah B

      Amen. That’s the beauty of it and it’s shown in every photograph.

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    Kathy

    I love that slideshow the brother and sister made together!

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    whippersnapper

    Mia, that smoothie looks absolutely repulsive, it’s brown, yeuch!

    I’m currently sitting at my desk with my shoes off and my foot propped up on an archive box with an old file in it because I have totally wounded my foot. Cut it on a protuding piece of something in the garbage bag while I was taking the bin up last night!

    Lucky Mr W cleaned it all up and bandaged it up for me. It is so freaking sore! Just on the side of the foot near my little toe too, a bit slash, yikes it hurts! Feeling sorry for myself. On the plus side, don’t need to make excuses for the gym!!

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      picardie.girl

      Eeep! Give it a day and if it doesn’t feel better, get thee to a medic! Also, when was your last tetanus shot?

      Poor thing.

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        whippersnapper

        I totally will. Had a tetanus shot last year so I was allowed to go and help out with the floods. Detachable princess told me on Twitter I should go today to the doc and I’m thinking about it. See how I feel abit later on!

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          picardie.girl

          At the very least, they might be able to give you some stronger painkillers! :)

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    Rach

    While I endure a Midwest US winter (which is one of the mildest on record :0 the Aussie brought the heat with her!) it makes me happy and wistful at the same time to see dresses and skirts and bright colours. It is -5°C right now with a wind chill of -12°C. Most days I look at the pretty section of my wardrobe a little sadly.

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      N

      Rach I’m in the mid-west too! Which part of the mid west are you in?

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        Rach

        I’m in central Illinois. 2 hours from Chicago, which makes me happy. :)

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          N

          Nice! I love Chicago! We drove up there in July and stayed a few days, so much fun! I’m in Michigan, so it’s about a 3-4 hr drive but definitely looking to come back soon!

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          whippersnapper

          I’m going to Chicago in April! So excited. Really want to see the dinosaurs at the museum!

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            Rach

            Whippersnapper, if you are remotely interested in history, get yourself to the Chicago History Museum as well. Fascinating! Even my husband has become a lot more interested and aware since visiting.

            And make sure you take time out to walk. Everywhere. Chicago is a very walkable city, and it’s so pretty, which is easy to miss in a car. And April is a gorgeous time of the year.

            Have fun! I am heading up for a day trip in April as well and I am looking forward to just walking. :)

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    Tara Mahoney

    Ok, I’m on the hunt for a new necklace for my birthday, and I’m loving the one Mia is wearing in the first pic in the gallery, the one with the light blue cardi. Anyone know where I can find it??

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      Mia

      There are a few different ones – some from tree of life. Start there!

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    lani93

    Can’t telll Mia went to Byron Bay! Haha. Love that bag!

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    choc chip cookie

    I think you guys need to do what magazines do, and that is list what the model in the photo is wearing.. :)

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    Ericka

    I was wondering why it is that Australian singers, songwriters and musicians are not supported by the Australian media (tv, radio, newspapers, magazines). We see so much about overseas artists which is fine but I think the Australian media needs to get behind our Australian artists so that they don’t have to go overseas to make a name for themselves. What does everyone think? What can we as individuals do to make this happen?
    @Mamamia – What are your thoughts and suggestions on this?

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    Alexa

    Welcome home Mia, happy new year to you, glad your back we missed you and your posts.

    4 migraines in 2 weeks, over it.

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      Mia

      Do you get blind spots before the migraine hits? I have two naprogesic and it helps masssively. Hugs.

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    monique

    First things first, Mia, tell me where you got those amazing shoes so I can buy them now!!! It’s so hard to find really pretty flats and they are amazing. Also loving the colourful outfits! P.s. Glad to have you back.

    Now for updating the rest of you. I’m doing OK. I’m still very upset, but I went a few days without crying so that’s a start. My best friend loaned me “Textbook Romance” and I’m currently going through it and it’s been helping. “It’s Called A Break Up Because It’s Broken” also came in the mail today, so after Textbook, that’s where I’ll be headed. I’m trying (and hopefully succeeding) to not let this situation get me down. I still miss him every second of every day but I’m currently trying to focus on me. I need to learn to love myself again before anyone else can. If we’re meant to be together, he will come back to me someday and if not, well there will be someone else.

    On a side note, I just finished reading “We Need To Talk About Kevin” and OMG I don’t remember the last time I was so engrossed by a book. I couldn’t stop sharing bits of it with my family, pretty sure my sister just wanted me to shut up and the ending! WOW! I really want to see the movie but it’s not showing in Newcastle any more :(

    http://moniquefischle.wordpress.com/

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      chef

      Glad to hear you are doing ok Monique. Hang in there. It’s a journey, and the only way through it is through it. x

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        monique

        Thanks chef! I’m hanging in there, barely, but still alive and kicking!

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      AJ

      Where abouts in Newcastle do you live? I’m from Newcastle too =)

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        monique

        Hey AJ, I’m in the Maryland/Wallsend area, so a bit on the outskirts! Where are you?

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      JosieY

      Monique it is so good to hear you starting to sound better. You have lots of friends here rooting for you – you are a champ!

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        monique

        Thanks Josie. I’m still hurting and missing him but I don’t want this to ruin my life. I want him to regret his decision, not be glad he left because I’m emotionally unstable. Just clearing up that I’m not doing this to get him back, just that’s what I’m going for. I’m still hoping he’ll come back to me someday but I figure if that ever did happen, it would be a very long time from now and I won’t just sit by the phone waiting for him to call.

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          roserusso

          What is for you, won’t go by you.

          xxx

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            monique

            True, that’s what I’m trying to remember. My background on my phone is the awesome kiss scene in The Notebook to remind me that true love exists and it will find me someday whether its in the form of him or someone else!

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          Susan As Well

          You’re in my thoughts Monique. I like your courage and your honesty x

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            monique

            Thanks Susan! Glad you think I’m courageous. I don’t feel it often.

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      Mia

      Monique! Shoes are from a little place in Terrigal on the central coast and have no label!
      Hugs for your heart.
      x

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    N

    Wow the photos of Josh and Grace are amazing :) I’ve met and worked with people with down syndrome (and other disabilities) and have found them to always be do gentle and loving. They show you their true feelings (referring to the ones I worked with).

    Also Mia loving all your outfits! Being winter here in North America it’s nice to see these images and be transported back home to Australia :)

    OMM- having a baby and being overseas without family or friends. I turned 30 a couple of months ago and since then I have really been thinking of when is the right time to have a baby. Given that we just moved here I’m not sure if now is the best time. Currently we are here on a 2 year visa which needs to be renewed in 2013 and what we will do from there I’m not sure, at the moment job opportunities for my husband are low in Australia with more of the work being here or Europe. I just don’t want to wait too long to fall pregnant but not having family here is hard! I wonder if I should just stop thinking about it until our visa needs renewing and we decide what we will do! Does anyone have experience in moving to a new country and having a baby?

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      Rach

      N, I am in a similar situation to you. I turn 30 later this year, and I am starting to feel the baby pressure (self-inflicted and age-related) and general cluckiness. However, we are on a study visa in the US and not really earning much. So we’re kind of forced to wait.

      My husband would love to consider his options in terms of what to do after the degree, but by then I will be almost 31 (and I refuse to have a baby without the assistance of family around). Even once we return home i will have to wait 12 months before trying because of health insurance (it’s on hold but we never had maternity), and besides, I’m going to have to work hard when we get home to make up some of the lost ground in terms of savings and the extra mortgage we took out to make it here.

      To compound matters, I have endometriosis, and my gynae said to go back if we try for three months and we haven’t conceived, then I will need surgery. So in addition to the general lateness (well, in my mind it’s late) of trying, there may be fertility issues to deal with. It stresses me more than I can say, and the stress has only got worse since we got here. I wish we could do both, but health care here is out of reach, especially on student insurance, so I guess I have no choice but to wait!

      If you have good insurance and can build a good support network around you, you are probably in a better situation than I in that you have an income. It has certainly been done many times before, but without family around, I would not beat around the bush if I needed help for anything, no matter how small.

      Sorry I couldn’t help, but it makes me feel a little more assured knowing there is someone in the world feeling just like me! :)

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        N

        Hi Rach,

        Thanks for your response, as you said it’s nice to know I’m not the only one in the world going through this, even though it kinda sux for both of us! My husband is working full-time here and I was working 2 part time jobs, gone down to 1 now (3 days a week) but am def looking into full-time work. We do have health insurance through his company and I’m added on top of that, but not sure that it covers maternity etc. Plus from what I know you need to have worked in a place for one year to get maternity leave and here it’s not like Oz where you get 1 year, it’s more like 3 months or something! And yes I also cancelled all my health cover etc in Oz before I came here.

        Sorry to read about your health issues though, I know that can make the situation even more stressful. I don’t know I think at this point I need to focus on gaining full-time employment and go from there.

        Best of luck!

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          Bryter

          I am an expat on my second country in less than three years and am currently eight months pregnant. My advice is to take out maternity coverage now (or check your current policy – and their list of direct billing hospitals and exactly what’s covered and what’s not – i.e. you’re covered up to 25,000 for all maternity costs including newborn care from birth, not aged 30 days).

          Pretty much all policies I’ve researched have a 12 to 15-month waiting period to delivery. But some had a 12-month waiting period to conception. Meaning it was 12+9 months until you’d likely have a baby. Not counting trying to conceive (this alone took us 15 months). So 12+9+15 = 36 months. Long story short: I am much older than I ever anticipated with my first baby due to these bloody waiting periods.

          If you think you are going to be moving companies or countries, take out a policy that is portable and it can then move with you. I did this and it has been a godsend. Check first which countries are covered and if premiums increase or decrease based on zoning (mine increased. Lucky me!) The premiums are high, but it’s still far, far cheaper than paying for the delivery (and all the pre-natal care and visits) later on.

          Best of all, I didn’t have to reset on my waiting periods. Believe me, this has happened to quite a few expat friends of mine. For example, the same company my husband works for has a different insurance supplier than our first posting. If I had not had my own portable worldwide policy, we would have had to reset the policy and begin from scratch with waiting periods.

          As for waiting to have a baby with family around, I understand. But I would argue that if you have insurance coverage and a supportive partner, it shouldn’t stop you from trying to conceive now, not when your ducks are all in a row (as trying to conceive can and does take time). One option then is to be pregnant overseas and then move home to deliver. Or as I’m doing – stay put and pay for ongoing help in lieu of family. I’ve booked in a lactation consultant for home visits, I will increase my cleaner’s hours so I can focus on my baby instead of housework, I’ve contacted the local La Leche league for support, joined local expat groups, will rely on friends, started a mother’s group, etc, etc. In many ways, it will be better than family.

          Of course everyone’s experience and circumstances are different, but I hope this advice helps.

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      whippersnapper

      Mr W’s mum had their youngest child living overseas – in the Netherlands!

      It was all completely fine, the only thing that bothers her is that he has a certificate of citizenship by naturalisation and I think she wanted him to have a birth certificate from Australia, even though he wasn’t born here?!

      US health system (if you have good insurance) is apparently pretty good too. While the state of it for the lower socio economic group is pretty bad, apparently, for those who have decent health insurance, it is pretty good.

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        N

        Thanks for that, as I mentioned above I’m not sure that the health insurance we have now covers maternity etc, but will have to find out.

        I always thought my children would be born in Australia, so it makes me a little sad to think they might not be, but I guess you can’t plan for everything!

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          missneriss

          Definitely check out the policy paid for by the company. If you’re ready, don’t wait. I always wanted to have my baby at home in Australia, but I’m in Holland and almost ready to drop and the care is outstanding.

          Who knows, maybe you’ll be lucky like me and have a family member come stay with you for a while, giving you that extra support.

          I’m not regretting having my baby overseas for one second (even though I’d like more than three months maternity leave!).

          Good luck with your decision N, you’ll make the right one for you.

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        Bryter

        That’s not the case now. I’m having a baby overseas in 6 weeks, but my child will have Australian citizenship from birth – not by naturalisation. Yes, the birth certificate will be foreign, but he/she will be considered an Australian citizen and have an Aussie passport within a month of being born.

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      Laws for Clouds

      I left Australia when I was pregnant with my second and I loved the freedom. No one knows you so they don’t interfere.

      However, you will need to outsource some support (nannies for date night and dental appointments etc) and you may find the logistics of working and getting child care difficult. I gave up work for a variety of reasons but a big part of it was that I didn’t have anyone who I wanted to leave a small baby with.

      Hope this helps x

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    psyv

    I love love love Vanessa’s dress! Where did she get it I wonder…