I sat through the trial of my baby's killer.

By CASEY VEAL

In April this year, a Supreme Court jury in Victoria found 19-year-old Harley Hicks guilty of entering the home of Casey Veal at Long Gully in Victoria in the early hours of June 15, 2012, and beating her son Zayden to death with a makeshift baton. Hicks was high on the drug ice when he murdered the 10 month old boy.

In sentencing Hicks to life imprisonment, Victorian Supreme Court Justice Stephen Kaye described the killing as a “totally and utterly evil crime”.

Here Casey shares in her own words what it was like to sit through the trial and how she has found some hope in the midst of such tragedy.

Now I will read the jury’s verdict … “Guilty.”

A day I had waited for with a torn heart, a day I had feared would never come. A day I can finally say that we helped deliver justice for Zayden. A day that finally came on the 9th of April 2014

For 34 days I had sat through court – some days fully; some days for only half. A few days I just couldn’t face that monster [Hicks] or the anxiety that followed. Overall, it was a long emotionally draining ordeal.

I heard every piece of evidence: all of the injuries my son suffered (which a lifelong forensic pathologist delivered with deep anguish), the evidence of health professionals and the evidence of Harley Hicks’ associates and family.

Most were talking about my son as a piece of evidence, a job that they each had to cover.

How could I blame them for such emotional detachment? But knowing this rationally didn’t stop the pain I felt each moment.

I knew that justice through the legal system could never bring my baby boy back, as much as I silently hoped and prayed that maybe, just maybe, they could find a way.

But again rationality told me that could not happen. Life in jail was the most I could hope for.

During sentencing Judge Kaye used words like “indescribable”, “ruthless”, “beyond human recognition” to describe how he felt at seeing and hearing in detail about Zayden’s death. Just like most of us, he was absolutely appalled at Hicks’ complete lack of remorse.

Not one drop of remorse could be seen in Hicks’ eyes. Not one facial muscle showed any regret, only sulking and sadness at being caught. Not once was there any indication that my son’s life mattered!

This a personal nightmare that I will live with for the rest of my life. Never will the answers I want be given to me.

The only one who knows these answers refuses to even acknowledge his actions.

In order to brighten my memories and to allow some sun to shine through my storms of grief, we will be holding a memorial market for Zayden.

This day will be held in Zayden’s honour, filled with joy fun and laughter. It will be a day for everyone to share and create happy memories while helping us raise money to help build Where Angels Play, a playground to be located here in Bendigo.

It will ba a place of peace and remembrance, where all bereaved families can remember their angels who were lost too soon. But most important of all it will be a place where my son Xavier will have a happy place to remember his brother forever. Zayden’s aunty, father and step-mother have been meeting with the local council to make sure this dream can become a reality.

I couldn’t be prouder for this to be built in Zayden’s memory.

Please help me share Zayden’s legacy by visiting “Zayden’s Army” on Facebook for information of the many amazing things on offer at the market to be held 5 October 2014 in Bendigo.

 

You can visit the Facebook page for the fundraiser by clicking here.

You can also buy a t-shirt in Zayden’s memory here.