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by JAMILA RIZVI
It’s been a whirlwind week. So much so that I’ve hardly had time to catch my breath before being hit in the face with the realisation that it’s Friday already and that means it’s cocktail time (huzzah!)
As we tie up all the loose ends at work and start getting psyched for the weekend – it’s time for you to tell us what you’ve been up to. How was your week? We want to know it all: The good, the bad and the ugly…
BEST: The highlight of my week is shamelessly cosmetic but I am standing by it. And that was Zoe Foster’s post about how to get perfectly tousled, messy looking, effortless chic hair. Having tried to achieve this sans advice for, oh I don’t know, EVER and failing miserably, I had basically given up – I was destined for a life of GHD straightened hair (and burnt ears, something I manage to do more often than I care to admit).
You see, whenever I try doing anything with my hair that involves product, I tend to bite off more than I can chew; literally putting litres of mousse and hairspray and serum and volumiser and whatever else into my hair until I have no choice but to wash it and start again.
But with Zoe’s expert advice, I finally managed to get it right and was pretty damn proud of myself. There has since been a disgusting amount of self congratulation and back patting from me on my sea-salty sprayed hair ever since. Thanks Zo!
WORST: A few weeks ago, Mamamia received an email from a woman called Emma, who had just moved to Sydney with her young family and was feeling kind of lonely. We asked Emma if she’d consider writing a post about how she felt and what she came up with was quite lovely – but the post really got me down.
I’m new to Sydney myself and instantly felt for Emma and sympathised with what she’s going through. Having tackled two new cities in less that 12 months now, it can be a pretty isolating experience when the initial adrenalin rush of moving wears off.
I’m trying to accept the fact that my friends and family are no longer all in the same place and probably never will be again. With my closest friends spread out all over Australia and my incomparable best mate, moving to London for 18 months TOMORROW (I’m not ready to deal with that one just yet) – I’m starting to really hang out for that line in “I Still Call Australia Home” when all of the ships come back to the shore.
What was your best and worst of the week? What’s on your mind?
Comments
298 Comments so far
I like the idea of being you. People love to hear about you, your story, what
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Hey guys, Jamila, Natalia – see the above “You Might Also Like” which lists the Best & Worst of the Weeks x 4 – can you please please put the dates on them????
We’ve asked a few times now as like to go back & update on previous but soooo much easier if their dates are there.
Thanks!
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My best is that I’m now OS with my beautiful ex and I couldn’t be happier. So in love with him and in the most beautiful place in the world. I’m travelling for the next few months but can’t wait to get back together with him officially when I’m back in Australia. Yippee indeed!
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Hey has anyone done weightwatchers lately? I desperately need to lose weight but I’ve been to WW before and was really disappointed. ANy suggestions would be really appreciated.
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Best: Just came back from my honeymoon in Hawaii.The best part of the trip for me was when we met another Aussie couple who were celebrating their 40th anniversary.
This amazing man and woman have 3 children, 8 grandchildren and survived a combined 3 bouts of cancer (he had two different cancers in his 20s, she just got the news she beat breast cancer before they left for their holiday).
Being a newlywed I was curious and asked them what their secret was. She said that not a single day went by in their 40 years without him making her feel like the most beautiful woman on earth (he chimed in saying “she does have a great bum”). And he said that no matter how down he ever gets, whenever she walks into the room he reminds himself to stop sooking and realises how lucky he is to have her.
Talking with these two amazing people who have really seen it all together, the highest of highs as well as the lowest of lows, has made me so excited to get started on spending my life with my husband.
Worst: This senseless evil tragedy that happened in the US. It’s beyond me to understand how someone can just kill innocent people like that.
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Best: A bloke at work (59 yo truck driver) was found on the floor of the crib room at about 4.30 on friday with stomach pain, sweating and looking like crap. The boys called me to have a look at him and for some reason I thought he may be having a bit of a heart problem. Called the ambulance and they identified a bit of a discrepancy on his ECG. Being a tough truckie he didn’t want to go to hospital as he was feeling better. So I had to make him go (he called me 9 kinds of bastard for it), so off he went to hospital.
This morning I’ve heard that he did have a mild myocardial infarction (heart attack) and he’s got arteries as clogged at the M4 freeway on a friday night. So I’m quite happy with my decision to make him go to hospital.
Worst: After dealing with the man above, and calling his wife etc to give her the good news, I missed chemo last night. So I have to go this afternoon.
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Nice work standing your ground, Seaghan! It’s bloody hard getting people to get medical help when they need it sometimes, isn’t it?
Hope chemo’s not too crappy this arvo.
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I had to be a bit of a bastard, told him that since the ambo’s had identified a problem on his ECG he’d have to get a clearance from a doctor to come back to work. The reality is that I can’t do that, but he’s a big tough bushy who’d probably not been to a doctor since he was smacked on the arse when he was born.
I bluffed him enough though, and I don’t mind being abused in situations like that when I’m right.
The man drives a truck, that fully laden weighs more than 80 tonnes, if he has a problem while driving that he could kill or hurt any number of people, as well as himself.
Gotta be cruel to be kind sometimes.
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Worst:
1: son crashed car on Friday 13th, single vehicle accident. Due to his age and value of vehicle it was only insured for 3rd party, fire & theft. 2nd accident by a male family member in a month. The fallout has affected the whole week.
2: we have agreed to loan him money for a cheap replacement car. I have access to his bank account, so I know I can get the money back, but it still sucks.
Best: he’s ok. Only had mild whiplash. He’s also finally seen his dr again after 3 years gap for his anxiety and ADHD and has started meds again. I’m not thrilled about the meds, but if it helps him I’m all for it.
OMM: we’ve sorted the car mess out finally and can get back to “normal” again, whatever that is.
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I did have a win this week, not child related. I found paperwork that showed I did not owe my employer money, even though they’d sent me a letter informing me that I did. I have notified them about this and will just wait for them to get back to me, but it could be a couple of years.
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Faybian, your son is alive, money is nothing compareed to the alternative.
Penny to a pound you work in the Queensland health system!!
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Lol. How ever did you guess???
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and yes, you’re exactly right. I could have been doing a funeral instead of worrying about money
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hi Faybian, I hope your sons’ whiplash gets better and everything works out with the car situation. My oldest son is a red p plater, and I worry about him constantly when he leaves. He thinks he’s the best driver around.
I also wanted to mention, that I have stopped judging pregnant women smoking. I noticed that you commented on one of my comments about not judging the woman on the plane with a crying baby, and you said , we all know what judging does, or something like that. I don’t know if you noticed that I responded to you and said, you’re right , It’s not helpful and it’s really none of my business. I just wanted to thank you for making me realise that. sometimes I see things very black and white, and it sometimes just takes one person to say hang on a minute, look at it this way. so for what its worth, Thankyou. ( I don’t know why but it’s just been playing on my mind). hope everything goes well with the pay situation too. Although The QLD health payroll system is a joke,, I must add. Have a great week next week.
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Hi everyone:
WORST: A playground fight, whilst I was on playground duty, which resulted in a 13 year old girl being badly assaulted. The worst of this was the mob of Year 8 kids who surrounded the girls, egging on the perpetrator, chanting and obviously enjoying every minute of the spectacle. There were 80-100 of them and my desperate attempts to break it up, I made no difference. It was like I wasn’t even there.
What is happening in this society/country that KIDS can obtain excitment and enjoyment from someone who was cowering in a corner like a beaten dog? I was sick to my stomach, disgusted with their diabolical behaviour and have spent the last two days trying to process it all.
I read an interesting article about kids and self-esteem. There are now far too many of them with this puffed-up sense of themselves as a result of school policy and parenting manuals telling all of us that kids need their self-esteem. What they really need is resilience, collaboration, integrity, self-discipline and EMPATHY. Who in that mob had empathy for that poor girl? From my perspective – which was in the middle of it all – none of them did.
It was a traumatic experience which I hope I never see again.
BEST: Only 9 weeks until I go to Italy and hanging in there until that plane takes off. Bring it on faster, please.
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That is just awful, Kathy. How scary for that poor girl
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Oh Kathy thats terrible, I hope you and the girl recover from this awful situation quickly.
I know a few children who are battling emotional/psychological problems at the moment. These are the sort of kids who cry when they dont win a race or when they lose a game of soccer. Instead of telling them to toughen up and get over it, mum will always console them with presents or complain to the school about how unfair it was for their child etc etc. And I agree with you, I think these kids problems have been created or at least exaggerated by the participation award and ribbons for coming last mentality that schools have now. They have been shielded from reality and told they’re wonderful at everything even when its obvious they’re bloody slow swimmers.
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Yes anon – the ‘every child gets a trophy ‘ thing is just a small part of an enormous issue – life isn’t fine and dandy all the time – and kids need help to realize this.
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I wasn’t planning on writing my best and worst for this week but something happened here today which was just awful!
There was a shooting in Colorado, I’m sure the news back home has shown it as well. Just horrible! And sadly will not be the last time something like this happens!
Best – Possible changes coming up in the future… will have to wait to see what happens but am trying to stay positive!
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Oh that is certainly my worst too especially when I have close friends living in Denver, brings it even closer to home. I almost cried watching the news earlier this evening. Please everyone, be sure that those you care about and cherish know it xx
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I just want to know how many more times does something like this need to happen before something is done about it! I’ve been living in the U.S for over a year now and nearly everyone I speak to thinks/has no issue with people having guns. They think it’s strange that in Australia it isn’t a common thing… well yeh then things like this happen and will continue to happen!
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I have not lived in US, but know many Americans and they see it as their right to bear arms to protect themsleves and like you said have no issue with people owning guns… Ice T was interviewed on British TV tonight in relation to something else but was asked his thoughts and said something along the lines of guns are our last line of defence against traitors….. There are so many questions to be answered.
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Protect themselves from what!…. as long as the laws here stay the same this kind of thing will continue to happen.
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I agree, they don’t seem to see that their fellow countrymen may just be the biggest threat to them…..
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You’re right Cinnamon that’s so so so sad. So bad. Such a huge problem over there….
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It is very sad phoodie… I wonder how many more times this has to happen before they learn a lesson!
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The problem is its written in their constitution that they can “bear arms” and the gun lobby is very powerful in America, so it would be an extremely brave politician to bring that to the senate/public for a referendum vote.
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True but something has to be done otherwise this will just continue.
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Have been following it. Can you imagine how terrifying it would be to be stuck in a movie theatre with a shooter? You couldn’t get out or hide….
When on earth will America stop people from owning guns??????
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Best: cuddles from my little boy. Watching him start to dance along with Play School and In the Night Garden. Watching this tiny baby grow into the little man before me now has been the most incredile journey, and I cannot wait to see what the next 18 months bring. Having a child is really the most precious experience and I feel so honoured to be this little boy’s Mum.
Best #2: I get another baby boy in 6 weeks (or so). How lucky am I?? Woohoo!!!!!!
Worst: Leg cramps. Nausea. Insomnia. Fatigue. Heartburn. Fluid retention. Braxton Hicks. Food aversions. Pelvic pain. I am incredibly grateful to be pregnant again. But these last weeks of pregnancy are becoming increasingly difficult, and I am running the gammut of awful prego symptoms. I cannot wait to have this baby in my arms.
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OMM: How to move past making a bad decision? I made a poor parenting choice this week, and while there were no bad repercussions, I am feeling awful. Sick to my stomach, can’t believe I would do that awful. I’m trying to accept it was a bad choice, to learn from it and to move on, but it’s the moving on bit where I’m stuck. I feel like a really bad mum, and think other people think it too.
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I’m not a parent, but you sound exactly like me! Beating myself up about all the mistakes I make… even the little ones, weeks later.
But anyway. Seriously, you do not have guide book for life. You just make the best decisions with the information you have at the time. Do you really expect that every single one of those will be perfect? Of course not. Do you think that all the people who you think would “judge you” have made perfect decisions? No way!
Now, with the benefit of hindsight maybe your action wasn’t the best. But you weren’t to know that at the time. So there’s no point beating yourself up about it, because you see the problem with different eyes than you did back then, and it’s not like you can change the consequences! Just minimise the harm, learn from it and move on.
Like I said – I’m not a parent. But man it killed me when I was a teenager that my parents didn’t own up to their “bad calls” even when I could see both I and they knew it. So depending on your kid’s age, maybe it’s time to be honest
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Best: I just submitted an application (5 days early – go me!) for a job that I really really really want. I have the support of my current manager, and am just so pumped for this.
Best: am going to Melbourne on Sunday to see my sister before going to a training course that I’m looking forward to on Mon/Tue.
Worst: I *know* I can do this job, but on paper I look a bit underqualified.
Worst: I am dreading leaving my boys for the 3 days I’m away. I do it again the following week. I hate leaving them – I miss them so much, and they get very stressed – as does poor hubby.
OMM: our youngest (3 next week) is going through an incredibly defiant patch at the moment. He’s refusing to go along with almost everything. It’s very wearying. We had a heart to heart tonight (well, as much as you can with a 3yo) so it will be interesting to see if anything changes.
OMM: just how much I want this job I applied for. Crossing everything.
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Good luck. Fingers crossed for you.
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New best: I posted already but I have a new best.
This is it: Today I kept the internet on all day & popped back to it every so often to read articles & comment on people’s responses etc. I have a small child & don’t normally do this. And I had a ball. I had some of the most interesting conversations I’ve had in ages about all kinds of topics.
I had to challenge my views & re-read comments to check for perceived sarcasm – it is seriously hard to tell sometimes & every time that I gave the Mamamia community the benefit of the doubt & responded as if no harm was meant, I found kindness & understanding come back. I was truly impressed after some of the stuff I’ve read in the last month or two.
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Best: kids back to school after school holidays. Which allowed for A lovely catch up with an old friend over tea and scones in a tiny unknown gorgeous coffee shop. Worse: without doubt the funeral of that innocent boy Thomas Kelly there would not be a mum amongst us who has waved their 18 Yr old son off for a night out, hoping they would be safe until they returned. His family are in my prayers
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Just wanted to post a bit of lightness.
Been really enjoying Mamma Mia lately. Spending lots of time on the computer in the eve reading everyone posts.
As a result my husband asked me this week if I was having an online affair!!
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If I had a “Like” button, I would!
I plan to meet up with some other Mamamia members in a few weeks and need to work out how to explain to my husband that I’m meeting up with a group of people I have only ever met on the Internet. I don’t think he’ll understand…..
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How awesome are you guys! I met up with Emma (of the “I need adult friends” story a few days back) with some of the MM crew this week and it was so much fun meeting her in person. I can highly recommend this internet friend-dating.
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BEST: London. I love living here.
WORST: London. You’re exhausting and seriously hard work sometimes.
xxx
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Oh I totally understand your best and worst
Also wish this rain and grey skies would stop, is worse summer I have had in over 8 years here in London Town. That said I can see things getting much brighter in the next week with the Olympics 
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Lucky you guys… wish I could be there for the Olympics!
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Me too! I like to try and help out those with problems and they do intrigue me.
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I posted this earlier today but not sure where it went? Anyway..
Best: Enrolled in the STEPS program at uni to refresh myself after finishing Year 12 in 1997, 15 years ago! Quite scared but excited at the same time. Do any mummies out there have any advice for studying while living with small people (3 and 22mths). Do-able?
Worst: Stinky washing machine (FWP, I know, I know) after our recent wet weather. I locked damp dirty clothes in there ready to wash the next day and now, even after several loads, it is still stinky. Life could be worse I know.
OMM: After making decision above (see Best) it means we will not be having a third child now. It was either have #3 and continue in baby land or move on with study/work/big people things. After seeing a friend today with a newborn I hope this decision doesn’t come back to haunt me.
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Not a lot of advice re studying with littlies. I am 2.5 years into 3 years of a diploma and a bit over it. It’s difficult at times, but I know it will all be worth it in the end. I just have to stick it out. I use daycare and make sure I study all day when Mr3 is there. I also have a friend doing the same diploma so we make sure we get together once a week leading up to exams to study together. Even if we’re doing different subjects, it’s very motivating when you have some else expecting you there to study.
And a tiny splash of eucalyptus oil in with your next few washes should get the stale smell out of your washing machine.
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Thank you becauseimthemum. I’m scared now that I have read your reply because a 3 year Diploma is different to a part time degree which will take eight years! (Four full time). Mmmm, maybe I should put some more thought into this.
Also – BIG apologies if I have this wrong but did you write a comment ages ago (can’t remember what post it was on) about your husband needing to lose weight? Was that you? Just wondering how things are going with that?
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Yeah, that was me. He’s doing ok. He hasn’t really lost any kilos, but has certainly lost centimetres. He’s been seeing a personal trainer twice a week since February and he is much fitter. If he would only watch what he ate then he would have lost 20kg by now. But he’s also recovering from a brain tumour so I need to remember to be patient. He will lose weight when he’s ready…… Thanks for remembering
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Me again. Maybe your study would be easier if it was part time over 8 years? I am doing my diploma self-paced through OTEN/Seek and I think it’s the self-paced part that is making it difficult. When I lose my study mojo, there is no one expecting me to turn up for lectures, no one really cares whether I hand an assignment in on time, there is no timetable to stick to. I’m also currently doing subjects that I have no interest in and that I know that even if I do use it later in life, then I won’t need to know it all in my head like I do now for an exam. I will look it up and follow the notes. But I need to finish these subjects to complete the diploma. That’s why I’m finding my study tough. Maybe you need to talk to other mum/students who are at uni about whether to do it full time or part time?
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Also, I used to have a very strict routine for my day and would set aside 2 hours 6 nights a week to study once my kids were in bed. That way I kept on top of it.
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I have a 5 year old and a 1 year old. It took me 6 years to do a three year degree, which I’ve just fnished. (i work part time as well). I’m going to start a grad. Dip. next year. Bically, take your time, don’t be afaid of dropping back to less subjects when circumstances dictate, and do assignments in advance so you have wriggle room if something comes up. I love studying, good luck!
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Hi Emmeline,
I’m in first year of a 4 year degree myself. I am lucky enough to qualify for JET childcare assistance – do you think you could get that or any other type of subsidy?
After consultation with the course co-ords and student service advisor at uni, I started off full time load, but crappy timetabling (an 8.30 – 4.30 day) which didn’t work out with day care meant that I had to drop a subject (luckily it’s not a prerequisite and I can do it any time during the degree when I can fit it in). I also let myself fail a subject (we both got sick and some other stuff happened) but I can do it over summer anyway, so I’ll still be on track.
I suggest talking to your course’s co-ordinators and see what they suggest.
I purposely made my days not have a lot of classes in them so that it’s like going to work – with a toddler it’s hard to do work and look after them and do other stuff. If you can organise that, it’s helpful. Then any work you can do at home is for stuff like assignments or that you couldn’t do at uni,
So much stuff is online now too, so it’s possible to miss the odd lecture. Make sure the faculty and co-ordinators are aware of what you’re doing and that you might need consideration for tutorial/lab times and the like.
What uni are you going to be at? There may well be someone here who can help you out.
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Oh and a great help for connecting and community is your Uni Mature Aged Students Club, Have a look around on Facebook for groups that your uni has and join them.
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Hey there Kris
I’m actually going to have to do part time AND by distance as the closest campus is 1.5hrs drive south of me (Central Queensland Uni)……..
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Wow, good luck! I couldn’t do it. I am too lazy – need to go in to classes!
It would still definitely be worth getting in touch with the people I suggested, though. I’m sure they have helped people in your situation before and will have some great tips for you.
What is the “STEPS” program? Getting you into writing for uni level stuff and that kind of thing? Lots of my friends went through UOW college last year to get into their course. I’ve done uni before and got in on my application letter and 20 year old HSC, but I think it would have helped doing the college course beforehand as I’ve had to get help for new ways of doing things that just weren’t around when I was at uni previously!
If they have a decent sized external/distance student body, chances are their support systems are pretty good too.
My cousin is doing a course through UNE with a 3 year old and almost 1 year old, I’ll try and ask her!
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I’ve been horrendously sick with morning sickness for 32 weeks. I kept hoping it would end but with only 8 weeks to go I doubt it will. My poor toddler and husband. So over being sick and all I can think about is not bring pregnant.
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Oh Wendy
Thoughts are with you…..
My sickness w #2 only lasted a couple of months and even though it was bad (hospital etc) it was brief! However, at about 35 weeks I became really sick w bronchialitis and it was SOOOOOO HARD dealing w 1) being that sick 2) being pregnant at same time 3) having to care for 17 month old at same time!
I FEEL FOR YOU!
It will be over soon….. I wish a fast fast fast 8 weeks for you.
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I’m feeling really lonely too and was thinking about Emmas post today. how she’s a mother and finding it hard to find new friends. And Jamila I’ve moved soooo many times over the past few years including one ill fated move to the country.
It’s funny as I always meet really nice mums with babies and toddlers but they are married and have their own lives…. It seems like everyone is married or partnered up and most with children. They are so lucky.
I know that feeling lonely is just a phase and I tell myself that all the time. But it’s hard. I’m trying to not let it get me down and not to feel sorry for myself and slump. But right now I’m spending every day and night alone which is tough.
But there are great people out there and I know I’ll make new friends soon. Hope everyone is well x
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I hear you, Louisec. There’s a Brisbane dinner being organised for interested people if you are in Brisbane. Are you a single mum? I’m not but have some lonely days too.
Being a mum is hard work. How old are your kid/s?
I hope you find some new friends soon. Hang in there xx
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Hello Hellopetal, thankyou for your lovely reply. sadly, very sadly I dont’ have children, God I wish. I do however have the two most beautiful special little furry girls. They really are beautiful and I am so lucky.
But I do wish I had a baby, that’s just not going to happen sadly.
I’m in Sydney and I think there are a couple of people organising a get together. Thank you for your kind words, very very appreciated.
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Sorry, I missed the subtext in your post, Louisec. Being lonely is very human & seems to be more so these days. More busy busy, less true connection.
I find that even married with kids don’t always have time for other people that are married with kids too. Being lonely is human. Have you tried any groups locally? Craft or book groups, indoor netball or dance classes? Libraries always have noticeboards & our city council prints a What’s On guide to classes & meetings. Sometimes when you pursue an interest you enjoy, the friends that like it too find you.
Best of luck
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Is there? I’m in Brissie too. Do you have any details?
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Helen is organising it. She’s left her contact details over in Emma’s post last week about Making Friends As An Adult. Come along and join us!
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Hey Louise! Sorry to hear you are feeling lonely
I am in Sydney too so hopefully there will be a meet up soon!
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THat wld be great Elle, someone is organising I will find out and let you know xx
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Im interested in the Sydney catchup aswell!
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Worst- 8 month old teething with really bad fevers and sleepless nights (poor little man and not so fun for pregnant mummy!)
Best- not matter how tired you are iin the morning how can you not smile at their beautiful face waiting for you!!
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Best… Nothing unfortunately.
Worst… Going into hospital to be induced only for the midwife not being able to find our little man’s heartbeat. I then had to give birth to my beautiful silent baby. In an instant my husbands and my heart broke.
RIP Patrick James, mummy and daddy love u very much and miss u everyday xx
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Sending you love and hugs xxx
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Sally,
Please know that all the arms of every woman who has lost a baby – and plenty of others besides – are holding you up.
Love to you and your family and beautiful little Patrick. Xxxxxz
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My heart goes out to you, your husband & families. I can only imagine what you are & will go through. Big hugs through the ether xx
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I’m terribly sorry for the loss of your little boy Patrick.
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Oh, so so sorry.
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Sally Sally Sally. My heart breaks for you. Nothing anyone can do or say will take your pain away. I wish you peace and comfort as you weather this storm xxx
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I am so very sorry Sally. Much love to you and your husband. Patrick is a beautiful name.
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Patrick James, what a lovely name for your son.
You must be in a world of pain.
My thoughts are with you & your hubby xxxxx
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Rest in peace Patrick James. Sending love, hugs & comfort to your mummy & daddy. Words are never enough at times like this but I hope you are feeling the support of all those around you Xxx
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Sally I am crying.
I am so, so, SO sorry for your loss. I’m so sorry for your loss.
What a beautiful name for your beautiful baby.
May he rest peacefully.
Sending all my strength to you and your husband.
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How devastating for you and your husband. I am very sorry for the loss of your beautiful son.xx
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Sending you love, hugs and lots and lots of strength at this sad time.
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Patrick your star is shining brightly in heaven tonight though you are missed and loved here on earth.
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so so so sorry.
lean on those you love.
RIP baby Patrick James
xxxxxx
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Oh Sally, from the mother of one Patrick James to another, I am so truly sorry for your loss. There are no words that can ever be written that would be enough right now so instead please know that there are so many of us who are sending love and support and peace and strength and light as you embark on this journey. The opposite to the one of your dreams. Tonight I am holding you in my thoughts. With so much love to you and your family. Sarah x
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omg I am so sorry. ARe you ok? Everything I think of saying sounds silly.
Of course your’e not ok. I just hope so much that you have support and good family and friends xxx
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I’m so sorry. Beautiful name x
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Oh you poor darlings. How truly awful. My heart is bleeding for you and your forever baby.
There is a beautiful song by Sinead O’Connor called One More Day. You can find it via YouTube. I listened to it endlessly after my own loss. I’ll listen to it again in memory of your little PJ.
Bless
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So so sorry Sally. Hoping you have people to take care of you. Just hold on.
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Thank u everyone for your kind words and support. We are going ok I.guess just doesnt seem real at all. Xx
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Oh Sally. I am so sorry. Words escape me. I do hope you’re looking after yourself. Lots and lots of love. Xx
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It may just be a little help but we are all here for you when you need to talk, cry, anything. I know that there are women on here who’ve been through similar terrible experiences who can help. We’re all naturally so sorry and worried xxxx
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How utterly horrific
So So Sorry for your devastating loss Sally.
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I have no words
Thinking of you and your husband xx
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I am so very sorry for your loss… RIP to your dear little boy
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So very sorry for you. Take care of yourselves.
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Sally, I am crying for you. If you need support and feel like talking please know we are here to listen xox
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So sorry to hear of your tragic news. My thoughts are with you xx
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Best.. finally going in to hospital to be induced, my little man was 10 days over.
Worst… Finding out my little man’s heart wasn’t beating, then had to give birth to him. At that moment my husband and my heart broke. RIP little Patrick James. Mummy and Daddy will love u forever xx
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I am so so sorry for your loss. RIP little Patrick James.
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Oh my gosh, Sally, I am so sorry to hear that. So, so sorry. You will be in my thoughts – I am sending you a big hug.
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I am so sorry Sally.
Sending you a big virtual hug xxx
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Oh my God, hearing that is the worst part of my week now too. I’m so sorry. RIP little baby Patrick James.
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Best: Still running. I’m making slow progress but it is getting easier so hoping to keep doing more each week.
Worst: The ATO entered completely random figures for my income so now Centrelink wants me to repay thousands of dollars in family benefits. Argh! The ATO have admitted their error, have no idea how it happened, and will fix it – in a month. The irony is that we had overestimated our income so we were actually owed money! I guess we’ll get it – in a month or so!
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F*** the ATO Cher! I called weeks after submitting my tax return to check on the progress and they informed me that they had no record of receiving it. Said I may have to wait up to 52 days for processing. Then a few days later – out of the blue – they deposited my tax return into my account. Don’t count on it but they are so F****** up your return might turn up sooner than later. Fingers crossed. Good luck.
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Amazing, aren’t they? I think the hardest thing is trying to find anybody there who actually knows what has happened. They had already sent me the tax statement with the correct figures a week before this mess, but then when I rang, they insisted they hadn’t received my tax return at all!!! WTF!
I shall take heart with your story Loulee and will assume that I will have this fixed before the month is up! Hope you bought something nice with your return
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Best 1: I’m back at the gym! I had to wait 3 months after having my girl as I had a c-section but I’m sooo loving being back.
Best 2: My tiny girl is all smiles and giggles, so lush! My big girl is sleeping sooo well (and my tiny girl not so well but lets focus on the positive!)
Worst: This damn flu! So awful this season. Go away, I’ve had it for weeks, which brings me to best number 3
Best 3: Although I’ve been really ill with the flu, both my girls seem to have somehow avoids it (touch wood!) and haven’t been sick for ages.
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Really? That made me laugh for some reason. I’m the opposite, I come on here loving reading peoples bests!
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Best
Back at work and eating notmally after 2 days of feeling extremely unwell with a virus!
Worst
Moved to a town called Bunbury for work for a few months….what to do on a weekend here? Quite worried about the loneliness factor
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Bunners! Whereabouts are you from originally, Zara? I’m from Sydney originally, and now living in Margaret River…(near Bunbury!). It’s pretty quiet down here and takes a while to get used to (well, it did for me). I haven’t been to Bunbury much, but you should definitely come down this way for a visit – beautiful beaches, countryside and lots of wineries!
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Oh your post made me a little homesick! Some suggestions – take a day trip to busselton, go down to the beach and go for a walk along the jetty (or catch the train out to the end) then go to The Goose for a coffee or wine or lunch! Head to Dunsborough and google map Meelup Beach and Bunker Bay, 2 of the most beautiful beaches. Take a book and relax or go to Bunker Beach Cafe. Margaret River is also lovely for fossiking and exploring and it’s just a lovely area for touring, lots of side roads, wineries etc. the Margaret river chocolate company is also great to visit!
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Can one of the MM team please delete this? It’s obviously a troll and not necessary at all
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Yuck
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Any solicitors out there have any career advice for a disillusioned private practitioner? This is my worst. Not having a good time at the moment, at all.
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I am not sure if this is an option for you… But I left practicing law behind after 4 years in private practice (including a stint with one of Australia’s biggest firms) and have not looked back! There are many other jobs where legal minds come in handy!
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Oh I am always SO relieved to read stories like yours….I do know that there are plenty of jobs that your legal skills will come in handy, but I’m just at a loss as to what!
I’m not in corporate law, so I’ve no interested in moving into an ASX or banking or anything like that…I’ve done primarily commercial litigation with some insurance work. I’ve been in private practice for 4 years (including my articles), but been a solicitor for only 2.5 years…
do you mind helping me by telling me what you do now and how you got there? I’d really appreciate the input. I’m just a little lost right now!
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Best: Having the day off work!
Worst: spending said day doing dull things like car services. And why are car tyres so expensive? I drive a small city car not a race car!
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Best: things are coming along in leaps and bounds. An extra stressful situation has resolved itself, and I am doing so much better in every way. Now able to cope much better with the other stresses I’m dealing with.
Best #2: Exercise! I went to the gym last night for the first time in ages. I ran like a demon and was stunned at how good it felt. The person next to me even complimented me! Bit odd but it made me smile.
Best #3: Relationship goodness. We’ve just hit a sweet spot again. Others in a long-term relationship will understand how that feels – like bliss.
Best #4: I am currently wearing a pair of jeans that used to belong to my sister (who was much smaller than me and whom I could never imagine being the same size as). 2 months ago I couldn’t get them on. Woo hoo!
Worst: not today. I’ve got my happy face on today, Larry!
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How sad
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Best: Catching up with an acquaintance tonight who is turning into a proper friend.. yay!
Worst: I’ve smoked more and gone to the gym less this week so I feel gross.
OMM: Our company has just bought in a new performance review and it’s so patronising and condescending. The expectations of me are so low that I wonder sometimes why I bother going to as much effort as I do when it’s not expected for me and there are no real gains for doing it. Seems quite demotivating rather than having the opposite effect.
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Love it when acquaintances become closer friends. Have fun!
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Best = New car – YAY !
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What kind of car? I am about to start looking around and I’m pretty sure I will stick with the brand I have, but it’s nice to know what else is around.
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Best- having a week off work, sleeping ten hrs a night and a couple of nanna naps a day! Going back to work on Monday will be tough!
Worst- off work sick with tonsillitis so too tired and sick to do anything. Going to try a little run/walk this evening and some yoga on the weekend…. hopefully don’t cough up a lung.
OMM- our seemingly selfish society. Monday (I think!) night on TV was either The Shire (which I know has been thrashed to bits), vs Four Corners (about Jessie who adopted a young Afghan refugee, and yes I know that’s been covered too). Four Corners was followed by a piece on how drug smugglers in Pakistan (I think it was Pakistan!) were taking the locals children as payment as the government had destroyed thier opium crops. It made me feel so guilty sitting in my comfy lounge room drinking wine and wondering what on earth can be done to solve these third world problems.
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The children are being kidnapped by drug gangs in Afghanistan. It’s heartbreaking.
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Best: deciding to drop my law degree for the time being, in favour of finishing my arts degree this year, and getting into the media/communications/publishing industry. After studying law for 3.5 years, its big decision, but now that I’ve made it everything feels a bit more positive. On that note – anything going at MM?!
Worst: still upset about my relationship that ended a month ago.
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QUICK! Internship applications close…. today! http://www.mamamia.com.au/social/were-looking-for-interns/
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Best: Husband turns in his final essay for summer school tomorrow. He really looks to me for support when completing his work, and we haven’t had a break from schoolwork in so long I am just OVER it! Anyway, this is supposed to be a best! No more assignments for 6 weeks!
Worst: Pulling serious hours in the band library, plus we had a concert tonight and I am playing in a musical which is every night for a week. I like what I am doing…but I need seriously need a break! Would like a chance to be me and do me things for awhile.
OMM: Midwest weather. Gahhh! So unpredictable and extreme. We are getting into the crazy humid months. Give me Perth 42°C and dry over Illinois 32°C with 98% humidity.
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Yayyy to finishing school! Booo to too many hours at work! I’ve had more hours at work lately as well which is good in a way but also bad! Meanwhile it rained nearly all day yesterday here! Today wasn’t too bad around 28. Weekend is going to get warmer!
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Best: my sister had her first baby! A gorgeous little girl! She had an induction (after transferring care from homebirth midwives to hospital when there were placental and amniotic fluid related complications) and she had her baby in under two hours. She pushed for only nine minutes for crying out loud! So exciting, and so terrific to attend. Her private midwife was with her and was so terrific. Hospital midwives and doctors also really great. No tearing, no bleeding, she was able to leave the hospital and go back home five hours after the baby was born. Everyone losing their collective minds.
Other Best: I’m one of two candidates being considered for a six month contract position. I’ve been having sporadic work for the last year and have been having financial trouble, so I’m really, really hoping that I get this job. Pay is good, hours are good, and since the longest period I’ve had work for in the last year is five weeks, having something for six months would be such a load off my mind. Crossing my fingers, toes, legs and arms for luck.
Worst (and I’m really scraping the bottom of the barrel for this!): I had to be the official photographer for the birth, since it was so fast the designated person was unable to get there. For the record, I hate photographs, both being in them and taking them, probably as a result of growing up in a family of photographers. So pleased that I managed to do an okay job and figure out how to use my sister’s $12,000 camera on the spot, but some lovely photographs came out of it that my sister was really pleased with. But if that’s the price that I had to pay for the privilege of attending the birth of my first niece, then I’m more than willing to pay it.
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Congratulations Aunty!
I just had a quick look on open post to see if you had an update! So glad it all went well despite the change of plans, but that’s the way it is with kids, the best laid plans and all that!
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Oh, thank you so much! Yeah, my sister was pretty upset that she was going to have to go through an induction, even though it was absolutely agreed that she’d moved out of the normal pregnancy and into a higher risk one. But on the day, we went and did all the natural induction things (nipple stimulation, sex (although I clearly wasn’t involved in that bit), acupuncture, castor oil, walks etc.) and there’s no doubt that it all helped speed things along to the point where she only had a prostaglandin gel, no drip or anything. We’re all so pleased that it went so well when I know from experience what a rough trot inductions can be. Also really glad that all the midwives and doctors at the hospital were really compassionate and understanding of how big a mental transition she’d had to go through.
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I’m glad all went well with the birth. I remember reading that you were disappointed for your sister not getting to have her home birth. It sounds like there wasn’t too much medical intervention which I’m sure is what sister was aiming for.
Good luck on the job front!
Btw, this is the first comment/reply I have made on mm, it feels good!
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Oh yay! Glad the birth went well!
Good luck with the job.
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Best: Watch Batman (The Dark Knight Returns) last night Gold Class with my boyfriend because he was so excited about seeing it.
It was such a freaking good movie, I loved it. Even though its very ‘actiony’, not usually my cup of tea, I totally loved it and really hope the ending has paved the way to a next exciting movie.
Also the boyfriend was very happy with me for buying the surprise tickets, and it was his first time gold class so he was stoked with getting food ordered and bought out at different intervals!
Worst: Enraptured with the Rayney case here in Perth and feeling sorry for the two young girls, who are flanking their Dad to court each morning but will be taking the witness stand over the next few weeks. What must they have been told/feel?
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Worst: Cold sore. No need to say more …
Best: (and it’s a bit sad, but … ) Have just finished doing the annual payroll tax for 3 states, and it wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be (the last part could explain my worst of the week!)
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Hi Robsmc,
Not sure if you already use it, but if you don’t Lysine is the BEST for cold sores. It is an amino acid that helps with symptoms and prevention. I always used to get them, but since taking lysine I have had very few!
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Thanks Kittykatkate!
My sister used to take it for years. I don’t get many once a year or eighteen months, maybe.. I happened to be at the GP for something else and she said I can now get Ezovir (famciclovir) over the counter now. A 3 tab dose, that if you take at the onset of the first tingle, it can stop them coming up. It used to be prescription.
They’re horrid things and should be outlawed!
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Oh I didn’t know that! I had two weeks ago and it is still lingering! (even with the lysine). I find that I know how a reaction to things like zovirax but that propovir (a beeswax thing) helps but will go and try this table next time! THanks
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Hi Guys
For any Brisbane MMers, I thought I’d let you know that Mamamia’s own Kate Hunter is launching the final book in the Mosquito Advertising series tomorrow. The launch is free and anyone can attend. So if you’re at a loose end tomorrow afternoon, grab your kids (or just go alone) and support Kate. She’d love to see you there. Details are here: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Mosquito-Advertising/251629449552
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hi bec,
what age are the books targeted to?
and where are all your books available?
thanks
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Hi Book Fan
Okay, Kate’s books are for kids aged 8-14 (the stories are about a gang of 14 year olds … but they’re age appropriate for 8 and up). And let me tell you — KATE’S BOOKS ARE BRILLIANT.
That’s how I met Kate. She sent me the first chapter and asked for some writing advice. They’re like Famous Five for the new generation. So I can’t recommend them highly enough.
As for me … my books are available on Booktopia. The most popular one is The Girl Most Likely (the main character is 27 … so it may appeal most to readers under 35). My other books are for teenagers (two fiction and one non-fiction).
Here’s a link to Booktopia where you can buy The Girl Most Likely http://www.booktopia.com.au/the-girl-most-likely/prod9780702233456.html
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Dropping in. Thanks Bec! Bookfan, the kids in my books are 13 so the stories are generally enjoyed by kids from about 10 years old. Bec and I share the same publisher, UQP – I believe Bec’s books will be on sale at my launch tomorrow.
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Hi Kate, can my 10 year old read it? he is an avid reader and quite mature for his age?
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Oh for sure! My boy is 11 and he and most of his mates have read them. Nothing confronting – just fun ‘advertising adventures’ (have I invented a new genre?) You should be able to get them from Booktopia.com.au – start with the first, Mosquito Advertising The Parfizz Pitch
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Good luck with the book launch Kate. Hope to get there after a few hours of fun at Downey Park.
My daughter has read the first one.
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Hey Kate,
I just bought my boy “The parfizz pitch” for his 10th birthday. I ordered it yesterday, and can’t wait for him to give me his verdict!
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If I’m feeling better I’m keen to get there. My Miss9 would love this kind of writing. She is a girl who wishes she wasn’t, so trying to find books for her without pink fairies or giggling girls on the cover is difficult. Go Kate!
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I was (am) a bit of a tomboy and these was the sort of books I’d have liked as a kid. I hope you can come – if you make it – be sure to say hi!
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Will do
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My worst of the week has been our kitchen renovations. We have been caught up in the voluntary administration of Kitchen Connection. They ripped our old one out on 04/07 and then told us the next day that delivery of the kitchen will be TBA. We have finally got a date of 15/08. So, it looks like another 4-6 weeks (on top of the 2 passed) to be without a kitchen…!
Basically, because they have gone into adminstration, we have lost any rights as a customer. It has turned into a huge nightmare!
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We recently redid our kitchen. It went smoothly and we were only without a kitchen for a couple of weeks. It was still a nightmare. I can imagine how awful this must be… Really hope it all gets sorted as quick as it can.
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Oh no! I do feel for you! Our laundry renovations have hit a snag – dodgy renovators 16 years ago put some sort of substandard underpinnings under the floor and we only found out now. Cue: extra $$ and forms to be filled out and sanctioned by our local council = delay, delay, delay without washing machine.
At least we know it will happen, though – just not quite sure when.
All the best to you in sorting it out.
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Did you know that you can buy some fantastic kitchens on Ebay? Some of them are basically new and others just a couple of years old. It’s easy to get them put in too – I did that with my last house.
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Best – 2 birthdays in our house this week. Love birthdays.
Worst – cannot get myself to bed before 11pm and our littlest rabbit in our house has started waking for a 4am feed, or a 3am gigglefest for 2 hours and I’m just way.too.tired.
OMM: Two biggish things – and this may be TMI but I had a baby 5 months ago and I stopped BF the first week in June and I haven’t had a period since. I have taken the pill you take while breastfeeding religiously but I kinda thought it would be back by now and I might burst into tears at the thought of accidently falling pregnant.
My other OMM is life plans – I feel like I’m the only person who doesn’t have a “this is what I want to be” idea. I have no idea. I have finished my child bearing(god I hope I’ve finished) and need to work out where to go next but I absolutely don’t have a career that I have always doggedly followed or desperately wanted. Does that make me totally odd?? I didn’t finish school and say “I’m going to be a doctor/vet/teacher/soccer play” I just found a job that I had skills for and I enjoyed, it lead me from one job to the next and then I had kids. I uprooted my family 2 years ago for me to do a job I thought was my ‘perfect job’ and turns out it wasn’t so perfect for me so … now I’m a bit lost… how does one find what they want to do? Or do I need to do some serious soul searching. Someone said this week I need to work out what makes me happy – and I felt like it was a cop out when I said “really, having a happy family and healthy kids makes me happy” …
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“having a happy family and healthy kids makes me happy” is not a cop out at all.
Im not career driven, i dont want to make lots of money. I want to support my husbands career, and I dont want anyone else raising my babies, thats my job. I want a happy family and healthy kids. That will makes me happy. That’s all I want in my life!!
Not a cop out!
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THANK YOU! I seriously was beginning to think it was only me!
After I say that I get the “but there must be SOMETHING you’re passionate about …?”
There probably is, but be buggered if I can work it out or be passionate enough about it to put everything else aside …
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You’re welcome!!
You clearly are passionate about something…your family! That’s all I want to be passionate about, for now!!
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So true! There is so much pressure to have a ‘big dream’ to pursue. I have no idea what I want beyond happy family life.
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It’s ok to have simple dreams. In many cases, that’s better as it’s more attainable.
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I think about what it is to be a wife and a mother as a life and career if you like. My question is (for myself), when the kids are doing their thing as teenagers or adults and my husband is working, what am I doing? What am I? What is my life? And I don’t know.
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Liz, I don’t think that you’re odd at all, in fact I’d say there’s lots of us about who are just like you! I had a career break to have kids and have gone back to work 3 days a week. It’s in an industry I worked previously, and I enjoy it, but I don’t feel the need to “build my career”. I enjoy going to work and then coming home and being with my family, which, like you, is the most important bit!
The simple stuff is the most important I reckon!
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Best: One of my clients is going to be on a panel at the Melbourne Writers Festival. Her first book was published earlier this year. So pleased for her!
Worst: Another interview for a fun job which I thought went ok; another ‘No thanks’. All you have to be is second on the day.
OMM: Good luck to all you other job hunters out there!
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Best- spent a lovely few days in Melbourne with a friend last weekend and completed the 10k RunMelbourne in 65 mins, 40 secs… about 3 mins better than my previous 10k time! Decided to take this week off for a mid-year break- it’s been great to not have to do the daily grind and just cruise along, exercising, visiting friends, getting tax stuff sorted and meeting the brand new baby girl of some dear friends.
(
Worst- feel like a bad ‘mother’ because I’ve just discovered my gorgeous puppy dog has fleas!! I treat him every month but they still got him
Happy weekend to all MMErs!
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Congrats on the run!!!
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Thanks Jamila!
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Bestest best best: I became a Mumma for the second time! He was a week overdue (which I know isn’t much in the scheme of things) but I managed to go into labour naturally avoiding an induction.
So I’m exhausted, delirious and completely utterly happy.
Worst: None!
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Congratulations!! What a beautiful time for you!
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Well done! Lovely news.
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Best 1#: the MM community. One Wednesday’s post I told how my uncle gave me crap about my weight (I am 10-14 depending on the branding of clothing). You guys were awesome at cheering me up and I am feel a little more self love than I did at the beginning of the week
Best 2#: To help along that process I chased in my birthday present from my Besites, which was a spa mani and pedi. I got to use Shellac polish for the first time and I think it looks amazing.
Best 3#: Good friends wedding tomorrow! Cant wait to celebrate with them!
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*cashed in my voucher/birthday present
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Oh beautiful nails! Do you mind me asking what the name of the lighter colour is? I love it.
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Thank you!
You can see the list of colours here:
http://www.shellacme.com.au/colour-chart/
I am wearing Strawberry Smoothie and Rose Bud.
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Love the feature nail!
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Best way to go when you cant choose between two colours!
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Best: My geraniums have started flowering! And the ones that I bought already flowering in pots are looking glorious in the sunshine with lots more new flowers in hot pinks & white with a pale pink centre all planted in the same terracotta pots. Very cheery. My chrysanthenums that I pruned after flowering are re-flowering! I love the internet for gardening info & its working.
Next best: I received in the mail a wooden coffee cup holder that I made in high school & gave to my dad. He passed away last year & my sister sent it to me from his things.
Best best: Emma’s wonderful post about ‘Making Friends as an Adult’ seems to have spurred some people out of the woodwork. I am excited about meeting up with some Mamamia readers in Brisbane. And I have also tried a few things like visiting a different local park with my daughter & we’re going to try a new playgroup too.
Worst: A couple of 4am wake-ups this week from daughter. She slept through last night, yay, so I did too. But it made our 10th wedding anniversary long weekend celebration feel a like it dissipated away quicker when you’re overtired with an overtired child.
Other worst: Bloody bush turkey got to one of the strawberry plants before I could chicken wire them for safety. I thought the possums would be more of a problem but with the rain this week we found a bush turkey sitting on our balcony railing (they don’t normally come in our yard, just tear up outside the fence) & I reckon he sat there surveying the yard for snack-worthy spots to dig. Cheeky fellow!
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There is a Sydney gathering??
Best – I’m well, I’m happy, my kids are lovely and I’m about to book a trip for the two little ones and I to go see the big one in Brisvegas.
I also had a nice coffee date last night. I do SO well when I’m bloody ambivalent about men
Worst: One of my buddies broke up with his girl last week. I let him know that she had done something not very appropriate or considerate of his feelings and he talked with her about it and she admitted she didn’t love him
. Now it seems she’s already moved on within the week. So I hate that he feels shite, and I’m hoping he and I can hang out and listen to some live music this week. Isn’t it funny how you never fancy your mates 
Have a great weekend, MMers xx
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Haven, I said I wold organise a Sydney gathering but only one person responded! Is someone else planning one because I’m in!
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I’d love to come! Sorry I didn’t see anything about it. I know a couple other Sydney people who wld love to come too.
great idea! x
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I’d come too
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Mee too
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