By AMY STOCKWELL
Mamamia’s editor, Jamila Rizvi wrote on Friday that she is sick of hearing that ‘30 is the new 20’. Jam is concerned about her mates who are wasting their 20s by working in dead-end jobs and dating dud partners (Hi, everyone!).
Jam dropped some truth bombs on her friends whose motivation is on the fritz: “Dismissing your entire 20s as just good fun doesn’t make you a successful, happy or fulfilled 30 year old. It makes you a lazy, lonely and confused 30 year old who is wondering where the hell the last decade went.”
This question of whether your 20s are the most important period in your life or a dumping ground for all of your worst impulses was the theme of a TED Talk by clinical psychologist Dr Meg Jay, who “specialises in twenty-somethings” in her psychology practice.
Dr Jay (and Jamila) want 20-somethings to straighten up and fly right and stop wasting their “defining decade of adulthood”. Have a little ambition kids!
In her TED Talk, Dr Jay wants to tell all 20-somethings three things. Firstly, don’t waste your 20s having an identity crisis. Build your “identity capital” and do something that adds value to your career. Secondly, abandon your “urban tribe” (your friends). They won’t get you anywhere. Instead, use your “weak ties” (your networks) to get a job. Third and finally, you can and should choose your family. Be “as intentional with love as you are with work”. Marry someone who is good for you and be resolute about it.
Top Comments
I agree with the author, I did the " right " things in my 20s.. I travelled to the uk, but while there worked and improved my career. I stayed with the same man whom I met at university. And moved down under, got married etc. however te marriage did not work, and there were no babies. Now at 39 I'm wishing I had more time single in my twenties, so I might have recognised a good v bad relationship. I made most career progression in my thirties, and changed slightly sideways a few years ago. I think yes people need to think about work etc, in their twenties but there is nothing wrong with trying a few things out.
Wow, what a delightfully smart and thoughtful piece. I'd love to see more confident, sassy writing like this on Mamamia. GIVE THIS WOMAN A REGULAR COLUMN!