by EDEN RILEY
I cannot believe how common plastic surgery has become.
I see such young women getting their noses, lips, breasts done. I want to sit down with them as they wait in the waiting rooms, tell them that as soon as they start messing with their face, they’ll bypass their twenties because they instantly look thirty-five.
Instead, I have made this video. Take a look:
There’s such a fear around looking our age…
I watched an old, white-haired woman crossing the road yesterday and thought of the secrets and wisdom she would have. Yet she’s mainly invisible, in the world.
I want middle-aged women to stop feeling like they are getting ugly, and I want young women to stop feeling like they need to get surgery to keep up.
And I want all of us to start respecting our elders more. Not sure if all that’s going to happen but at least I can make a few people think a bit!
Plastic surgery is dangerous because it’s a slippery slope. The normalisation of it all is abhorrent. This is not normal.
Women should not have to feel the need to get major operations requiring painful recovery, all in the name of “beauty.”
As for labiaplasty … genital mutilation is alive and well, being performed in surgeries all across Australia.
I made this video because we all need to laugh more … especially at the things that are utterly ridiculous to begin with. I am going to be ageing disgracefully, and I get the feeling a lot of my female comrades will be right there alongside me.
We need to claim our bodies back. They’re ours. And they’re amazing.
(And no, I didn’t actually eat the chicken.)
Eden Riley has been blogging for five and a half years. Her blog, Edenland was named Best Australian Blog 2012 this year. She is a trained copywriter in the 90′s and now writes freelance pieces and blogs from her home in the Blue Mountains.
You can follow her on Twitter @EdenLand
Do you feel pressure to look younger? Conform to some ideal of what beautiful is?
Comments
84 Comments so far
I have always thought about having a breast enhancement, I’m barely an A cup. Once I felt mature enough and my body had done the wonderful job of producing our children, my A cup is now probably a bit saggy too. The thing that stopped my fom havng my breasts ‘ fixed up’ was having a daughter. It’s quite likely she will have my body shape, I want her to grow up knowing big boobs is not necessary to having a happy and fulfilled life.
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that’s a cracker! I can’t believe you didn’t flinch when those fillets went in your bra – cold not?!
As a teen I suffered extreme embarrassment for odd boobs – one a b one a good c – finally had one enlarged and felt fantastic – seriously.
I do dye my hair – that’s as far as I’m going though.
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Funny but it isn’t as black and white as that. Some people need plastic surgery for physcological reasons. I do agree that it shouldn’t be normalised for any reason and that this is a worrying trend amongst young people. I also think that we should have more respect for meat and where it comes from.
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I snorted till I cried. And then threw up.
This video did more for my abs than any plastic surgeon could do – Thanks Eden.
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Eden I love you! This was awesome
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I dunno, I thought the chicken fillets were pretty fetching
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I honestly didn’t realise how screwed up my mindset was until I saw this and read the comments. I have only just turned 21 and have been considering plastic surgery for a while (3 years). Liposculpture, breast lift, tummy tuck. I should just be grateful that I’m healthy and all my parts are working as normal! Funny how society’s views sneak up on you.
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LAURA.
You. I did this video for you.
I bet your body parts are fricking fabulous. All of them.
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I’ll NEED a breast-lift when I’m older as big boobs = saggysaggysaggy. :’( That or a reduction.
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Just saying… I would have eaten the chicken.
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Totally eaten the chicken!
I am so with you Eden. Not that I’m against all plastic surgery of course. I’m 42 and one day last year I woke up with a wattle – that bit of saggy skin under the chin. If I had the money I would do something (very subtle) about that.
About young women getting stuff like collagen and botox etc…you all look the same and you all look older. Also women who are older who get it just look old and ‘done’.
I read a book recently – The Stone Gods by Jeanette Winterson. It’s set in a dystopian future where people can set their Genetic Age. So everyone (apart from a small minority) is beautiful and buff 25 year olds….So where to from there? Women start to set their age earlier and earlier and earlier…
Sometimes I wonder if this is where we’re heading…
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Wow Mandy – that book sounds amazing! I’m intrigued at the “small minority” who aren’t all buff and 25, think I might have to read it!
I never knew that saggy bit of skin was called a wattle! I just call it my turkey neck.
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Hi Eden , Yes it’s a great book and Jeanette Winterson is one of my favourite writers! So funny but poignant too. It’s been a few years since I’ve read it but I remember a character who is the hottest star of the moment. She’s 40 with the body of a 12, year old. The book is really out there as you may have gathered but incredibly insightful.
Re: Wattle. I remember it from Ally Mcbeal. There was a guy who found them sexy. gobble, gobble, gobble!
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By the end of this clip I felt inspired, optimistic, and slightly hungry.
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Bahaha, love it I think we are related Eden, Im 47 flat chested rough as and love it and as a not very popular teen or young adult am now as a middle aged feral a man magnet Ha, I really wish i could give all of you unhappy girls a big cuddle, love yourself totally and without any ifs or buts it is not a practice run kids this is it so please be kind to your selves.
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“Be kind. Everybody you meet is fighting some sort of battle”. How true Eden. And it is quite often very well hidden, especially with humour and ballsy self confidence. Great take on the normalisation of cosmeic surgery (although i’m not adverse to a jab or two to be totally honest!) I hope you win your battle.
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Love this Eden! And so glad Mamamia took this on so that people who are yet unaware of your blog can be exposed to the awesomeness that your readers know and love.
)
(PS – you should have had Eminem’s ‘Lose Yourself’ playing in the background
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I don’t believe that it should be ‘normalised’ to the extent that it is today for minor insecurities, however I do think it has a place in society (esp for reconstructive surgery or if you have serious issues/problems with your body). Also I dont agree with comparing labiaplasty with genital mutilation, because of genital mutilation happens to girls who have not given their consent and can phyisically impare them (to the point that they cannot have children in some cases). But yes I do agree that ageing should be a privalege afforded to the lucky (many people unfortunately don’t make it).
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I can just not think of a better way to sum up this whole situation. The whole acceptance and “normalisation” beggars belief. I am a saggy baggy elephant but I make the most of what I have got. Too busy going places and having fun than looking in the mirror.
SING IT SISTER!
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Loved the tongue in cheek video!. I’m only in my early 30′s so my view could change but I am really not keen on going down the plastic surgery route, I havn’t seen many examples of people who look better after it. Much prefer to put my dough to living life.
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You rock my boat Eden Riley … but you know that. Having said that I will never look at a tray of chicken breasts the same way again. I think it’s thighs from now on in our stir fries!
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As a mother of two who is rushing speedily up on 40, I totally get the urge to ‘have a little work done.’ I hate my yellowy teeth that show up all nasty in my non-airbrushed photos, and those vertical lines etching themselves ever deeper into the space between my eyebrows. Sometimes I pull the loose skin on my forehead up toward my scalp and think “I wonder how much it would cost to…”
And I’m a natural girl at heart. I’ve never even dyed my hair. So if I’m feeling this way, other women must be too. As my grandmother always said, “I know that ageing happens. I just didn’t think it would happen to ME.”
But whenever I start thinking this way, I remind myself how much better it would be to save those bucks, or throw them on my mortgage, so that I can be debt-free a little bit faster and then rock the rest of my life by traveling around the world, seeing and doing amazing things. Who the flip cares if I have lines on my face if I’m an interesting person with an interesting life?! There are people in the world who can’t even feed themselves, let alone worry about a few yellowy teeth or some cellulite lovehandles.
Whenever I start winding myself up on my imperfections, I find a little perspective helps bring me back down to earth. Thanks for being so courageous Eden. The world needs more funny reminders that injecting yourself with collagen and botulism poison and silicone is NOT NORMAL!!
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Thanks Eden. Very courageous of you! As a mother of two who is rushing speedily up on 40, I totally get the urge to ‘have a little work done.’ I hate my yellowy teeth that show up all nasty in my non-airbrushed photos, and those vertical lines etching themselves ever deeper into the space between my eyebrows. Sometimes I pull the loose skin on my forehead up toward my scalp and think “I wonder how much it would cost to…”
And I’m a natural girl at heart. I’ve never even dyed my hair. So if I’m feeling this way, other women must be too. As my grandmother always said, “I know that ageing happens. I just didn’t think it would happen to ME.”
But whenever I start thinking this way, I remind myself how much better it would be to save those bucks, or throw them on my mortgage, so that I can be debt-free a little bit faster and then rock the rest of my life by traveling around the world, seeing and doing amazing things. Who the flip cares if I have lines on my face if I’m an interesting person with an interesting life?! There are people in the world who can’t even feed themselves, let alone worry about a few yellowy teeth or some cellulite lovehandles.
Whenever I start winding myself up on my imperfections, I find a little perspective helps bring me back down to earth.
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As a mother of two who is rushing speedily up on 40, I totally get the urge to ‘have a little work done’. I hate my yellowy teeth that show up all nasty in my non-airbrushed photos. I dislike those two vertical lines that seem to be etching themselves deeper and deeper between my eyebrows. I sometimes pull the loose skin on my forehead up toward my scalp and imagine … what if. I’m a natural girl at heart. I’ve never even coloured my hair. So if I am feeling this impulse, I can totally appreciate that other women are too.
But seriously. Is it really worth shelling out all those bucks just to get a momentary “boost” in the form of a collagen injection or facial paralysis. You can’t stall the inevitable. My grandmother always said, “I know ageing happens, I just thought it would make an exception — for me.”
Wouldn’t it be better to save those bucks, put them in savings, or on your mortgage, and get yourself debt-free a little bit faster, so that you can travel the world, do and see amazing things? Or spend some time volunteering for people who can’t even feed themselves, let alone worry about a few premature wrinkles? Whenever I find myself starting to fret about how my age is catching up to me (often after looking at too many “women’s magazines” not incidentally), I find that a little perspective helps bring me down to earth.
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I personally am really looking forward to “aging gracefully” – bring on the compressed powder so you get that powdery, wrinkly, nanna skin, flowy brightly coloured Mu Mu dresses, those one piece bathers that are almost shorts with the pointy boobs, and getting my hair died light purple. (I am not being sarcastic BTW.)
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That was hilarious!! Thank you so much for that, great bod by the way
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LOVE you Eden! Love!
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This has made my day Eden
Can I ask are you related to Gina Riley??
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Ha – no I’m not. Love her!
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I know this article is tongue-in-cheek, but referring to labiaplasty as ‘genital mutilation’ is quite insulting.
Labiaplasty is a legitimate surgical procedure; genital mutilation is something altogether different.
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Labiaplasty = cutting bits off women’s genitals
Genital mutilation = cutting bits off women’s genitals
I think calling labiaplasty a legitimate surgical procedure is what’s insulting.
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There are some legitimate reasons for having labiaplasty, it’s not always so that women can have ‘prettier’ vulvas. Some women have a labia minora that protrudes enough to cause a lot of pain / get caught in underwear / be painful during sex. I doubt those women get it done because they want to look like a porn star.
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Agreed, Zepgirl.
It’s generally accepted that women who have undergone a mastectomy are entitled to breast reconstruction, but somehow we still view surgical correction for congenital abnormalities of the vagina as taboo!
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grrr my comments are disappearing again… Agree totally Zepgirl! ALSO genital mutilation is often done without the consent of the child (and they definately don’t know of it implications) and can can cause wide spread physical damage (e.g. a woman may not be able to have a child because of the way she is stitched up etc) and abnormalities, while labiaplasty does cause physical harm (I’m sure that there are risks, but the adult woman is accepting of these for VARIOUS reasons). Do I agree that our culture is becoming obsessed with our looks and vanity? Of course, but I don’t think its right to generalise about these issues and compare the two, that’s just ridiculous and closed minded.
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I think the fact that you think labiaplasty ISN’T a legitimate surgical procedure, is very close minded of you and shows how little you know on the subject.
There are MANY reasons why someone may have one, here’s just a small bit of reading for you –
“Labiaplasty corrections include clinical presentations of congenital defects and congenital abnormalities, such as vaginal atresia (absent vaginal passage), Müllerian agenesis (malformed uterus and fallopian tubes), intersex conditions (male and female sexual characteristics in a person), etc.; and the exterior cosmetic refinement of the vulvo-vaginal complex, to repair the tearing and stretching of the labia minora caused by the mechanical stresses of childbirth, accident, and age.”
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I think the fact that you think labiaplasty ISN’T a legitimate surgical procedure, is very close mind of you and shows how little you know on the subject.
There are MANY reasons why someone may have one, here’s just a small bit of reading for you –
“Labiaplasty corrections include clinical presentations of congenital defects and congenital abnormalities, such as vaginal atresia (absent vaginal passage), Müllerian agenesis (malformed uterus and fallopian tubes), intersex conditions (male and female sexual characteristics in a person), etc.; and the exterior cosmetic refinement of the vulvo-vaginal complex, to repair the tearing and stretching of the labia minora caused by the mechanical stresses of childbirth, accident, and age.”
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Very well done!
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laughed my ass off.you are one funny lady.
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Love your work Eden x
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That didnt make me cheer or laugh, its just a woman making fun of other women. Trying to make women who choose to enhance their appearance feel bad about themselves. Why would that make me cheer?
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I’m poking fun at the culture existing in Australia today with young women who think that getting their lips and breast augmented is just another beauty routine. It’s a dangerous and insidious mentality.
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For someone who is trying to say we should all accept ourselves as we are, you certainly don’t seem to ‘accept’ women who choose to have some work done!
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No. She’s not having a go at you (or me). She’s having a go at a culture that makes us think that injecting ourselves with plastic will make us happier and more deserving of love. A subtle but important distinction I think.
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Well said. That feeling of wanting/needing to have work done isn’t a choice – it’s something learned from the media and other sources. It’s sad that women feel they need to ‘choose’ have this done to look pretty!
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Hahaha love it! Thanks for a morning giggle with some great depth
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That video is good fun! Great start to my morning.
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Classic, I`m writing up my grocery list now “chicken fillets” Seriously though, I`m 51 and I like growing older, I`ve had my younger years, I feel good on the inside, if people don`t like what they see “tough”
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YES Bundyjacs. Power to you.
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Screw it, I’m staying natural. Maybe I’ll be an exotic beauty when I grow old because I haven’t had surgery and ‘done’ faces will be generic and boring.
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So many older women who have had surgery look downright creepy!
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Love. This. Maybe I should drop by the grocery store and pick up some boobs on the way home…
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Everyone praising this video, yet so many women yesterday said they would give their CHILDREN plastic surgery to make them FIT IN with the other kids.
Basically telling their children that they are imperfect and need fixing.
Sticking out ears, flat chests, bumpy noses – we need to stop recognising these things as FAULTS and see them simply as the variety of life.
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As a male I can say definitively that those women are stuffed in the head and need to reassess their priorities before they do even more serious damage to their children. This is a new form of Munchausen’s by Proxy and it is both dangerous and stupid.
How have we become like this?
Women used to blame men for making them feel imperfect but it has gone way beyond that. Men just want someone they can talk to, and who looks after herself. But that does not include filler, Botox, or labiaplasty, the very thought of which makes the skin crawl.
Reality check please. I’d prefer a natural beauty who ages gracefully to a plumped, primped Barbie doll any day. Women need to stop looking for models of beauty in magazines that are only designed to make them feel bad about themselves. Because it works every time.
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All good points, but the reality is – nobody wants to be bullied for having dumbo-the-elephant ears. Would you?
If you have never had an outrageously embarrassing feature on your face, then you cannot know how disastrous it is for self-esteem.
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Shouldn’t we concentrate on bringing up our children not to bully those who look different (especially as everyone except identical twins do look different?) rather than on changing us to look all the same? Isn’t bullying always the bully’s fault, not the fault of the person who is being bullied?
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While I think the premise of the vlog is great, it has to be said, not everyone thinks their bodies are amazing.
Mine has failed me horribly, in many ways & subsequently I dislike it very much, I can’t see any positives, the negatives far outweigh them.
I have no issue with aging, am happy to look my age but I doubt I will ever feel “womanly”, no matter beautiful.
I envy you Eden & every woman like you. You don’t know how lucky you are to be able to love your amazing body.
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If Only, thank you for your comment. Made me think, and I like that.
What you can’t see in the video … is that I’m currently going through some of the blackest depression of my life. I guess that’s partly why I did it, to have some fun. My issues are all invisible to the eye. I envy people who appear to have their life together, who know the trick of doing things.
Yes I can have fun and take my top off and not care, but I have a lot of other things I have to deal with.
Guess it’s like that saying – Be kind, everybody you meet is fighting some kind of battle.
Love, and peace to you xx
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Oh Eden, that’s so well said. You can only see the outside of me. Isn’t that the truth! No-one knows our insides except us. More power to you, lady, for this kind of “lighten & brighten” the load of wear & despair…..I’m 62 and cannot believe it but gee I’ve had some amazing life experiences along with the ones no-one wants but hey I’m here, I can laugh and cry & finally I now have NO MORE DYED hair. Grey baby, grey! D xx
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If Only – learning to accept our bodies can be a life-long process for many of us. My body has caused me no end of angst – but the point is, as I see it, that a quick fix through plastic surgery & the like doesn’t make us better people. I view life as a process of personal growth and this means coming to terms with what we don’t like about ourselves. Otherwise life is meaningless and shallow…
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Ha ha! Oh Eden, you’re a scream!
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You have great breasts. Which supermarket do you go to?
(Loved it, babe. Very real. Very true.)
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I know a very attractive 38yo woman who I see from time to time at parties etc…
I saw her a few weeks ago at a mutual friends birthday dinner and was shocked by her appearance. She had that obvious swollen/puffy look around her eyes and cheeks that lets everyone know that she’s had some sort of work done. And obviously she was trying to look younger or smoother skin or whatever. All it has done is make her look older, as she now looks like a woman in her late 40′s or 50′s trying to look younger.
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I totally agree. I know several women who are starting to get that ‘puffy’ look… also the ‘frozen top lip’ look and the ‘expressionless forehead/eyes’ look…. even if it does iron out a few of the wrinkles it immediately makes them look older as they get that ‘older woman trying to look younger’ look about them. It looks sad and a bit pitiful.
I might add that it is the same for men too… hair plugs, botox and wearing hoodies over 50 can make men seem older and a bit pathetic as well.
Age gracefully people!
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In some ways, I’m looking forward to aging. I plan on being a Senior Hippizen and that does not involve cosmetic surgery.
http://mum-abulous.com/2012/08/31/a-senior-hippizen/
Love Mumabulous
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Wow! Eden looks great for a 40 year old who has had two children.
Love her take on cosmetic surgery.
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Hey, thank you Anna!
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Just brilliant! A very refreshing style.
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LOVE Eden. Her writing leaves you breathless and her videos are hysterical.
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Breath of fresh air.
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lol this is funny!
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What is wrong with looking 35? I am 35 and I look great. But you are right, Eden, the normalisation of cosmetic surgery is quite awful along with all this airbrushing bollocks. The best we can do is always be happy with our own bodies (there is some part we love, concentrate on that) and show a pride in ourselves and hopefully that will show our daughters that beauty comes from confidence, not a nip and tuck. Like Germaine Greer said (I paraphrase), ‘love your arse’
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there is nothing wrong with looking 35… when you’re 35. Go you!
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Oh, nothing wrong with looking 35 AT ALL. At all … I just meant that plastic surgery instantly ages twenty-year old faces. Is that you in the photo?! Amazing!
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You’re just divine my darling!!!
Love your work
Rx
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I wonder how the stir fry turned out. Now I know exactly what I need to do to feel validated in this world.
Eden keeping it real – love it.
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That was great.
So dry, though, I know some dingbats will take it literally.
I recently found myself in a Facebook fight when one of my young, male cousins suggested all women with small tits should get a boob job. Sadly, all the girls agreed with him! I got in there and said NO. Then some of my male friends said NO. But the girls ganged up on me, called me names and suggested my straight male friends must be homosexual. I couldn’t believe it. Here I was trying to defend the girls – telling them they’re beautiful as they are – and they were the ones persecuting themselves! I gave up.
I can understand a completely flat-chested woman wanting to get some reasonably-sized mounds on her cheat. Beyond that, I think it’s ridiculous. Nothing wrong with little, perky boobs – they’re fabulous. I have big boobs and I spend most of my time trying to minimize them. They can very easily make you look fat.
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lol wow I was nodding and agreeing until ‘they can very easily make you look fat’…. God forbid someone look a bit fat.
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There’s nothing wrong with looking fat but, personally, I don’t want to look fat – and my large breasts have a tendency to do that sometimes. It’s one of the drawbacks of having big boobs that, sometimes, small-breasted women don’t realise.
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Yes, absolutely agree.
I’ve experienced having all sizes of boobs. I was a flat-chested teen who longed for boobs, then I got medium-sized boobs in my twenties when I went on the pill. Now I’m a breastfeeding mum my boobs are huge – and I hate them! (To be clear: love what they do, hate how they look.) They definitely do tend to make me look even bigger than I currently am. And they totally get in my way – it’s bloody annoying!
I’d love to magically have my mid-sized boobs back again – or even my little teenage ones. At least they were cute & perky…
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As some one with big boobs & small everywhere else it is very hard to feel good in what your wearing when you need to get a size 18 to fit the boobs in but the rest of my size 10 body is swamped by the tents I’m wearing.
You can still look & dress well if your large but I am out of proprtion and all I want is to be able to wear dresses and tshirts without looking like an oompaloompa
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I agree with yourself and Yeah! I have this issue too.
To fit my chest, the rest is baggy and VERY unflattering most of the time *sigh*
I have already decided to have a reduction after I have kids, as a gift to myself. The back pain also isn’t worth it!
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Couldn’t agree more. Small boobs are great! Sexy dresses without a bra and there are plenty of guys who like skinny girls – I married one. Every shape, colour, size can be gorgeous – whether short, tall, blonde, brunette, big boobs or little ones. But I know many women who can’t see that we’re not living in a one size fits all world . Love what you’ve got …
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I hope they were free range chicken breasts
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