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A few weeks ago, my mother was mauled by a dog. She has only just been released from hospital after having a four-hour operation including skin grafts. The dog that attacked her was a dog she had met many times before. This time, she reached out to pat it and, for some unknown reason, the dog didn’t like the cut of her jib. It got a hold of her left hand and didn’t let go. For minutes that surely felt like hours.
The daughter of the owner of the dog came to see my mum in hospital. To assure her they would ‘keep the dog out back’ from now on.
To be frank, I am so over so many dog owners.
Currently living in the English countryside, we are in dog central. Everyone here seems to have a dog (or two, or three) – mostly very healthy-looking black Labs who get a good amount of exercise. They’re beautiful animals and my kids have had great fun with them. My daughter spent a good hour in the park after a snowfall one day throwing snowballs for one of them to catch and both parties had the time of their lives. I have no issue with this. The owner was there, I was there, the owner asked if it was okay if she took her dog off its lead, assured me it had been around children all its life, and I’d said yes. Over the years, I’ve met many dog owners like this – respectful of my, and my children’s, personal space and welfare and of the law.
My problem is with the other dog owners. Over the past eight years (since my first child was born), I have had dog owners, strangers to us, coerce my children over towards them to pat their dog when I have already told my kids not to (‘But he loves children!’). I have had family members let large dogs, unaccustomed to small children, into the same room as my kids when I’ve specifically asked they be kept apart (‘It’s not fair that he has to stay outside!’). I have had a barking dog chase my kids across a children’s park (‘He loves to run!’). I have had a dog nip my son on the ankle (‘He didn’t pat him right!’). And then, just yesterday, again at the park, I had a German Shepherd who weighed more than me jump up on my chest and steal my daughter’s gloves from my hands (‘He’s only playing!’). Knowing what had just happened to their grandmother, my kids were so freaked out they wouldn’t come down from the top of the climbing frame until the dog had retreated from sight.
What truly amazes me is that if I had turned around yesterday and told this dog owner that her 70kg dog should be on a lead in a children’s playground, I would have been the psycho.
So, look, it’s nice that you have a dog. Yes, I’m sure he, or she, is adorable, obedient, great with kids, would never bite anyone and loves your family very, very much.
But that’s what the owners of the dog that mauled my mother would have said too.
It’s your choice to have a dog. Love it. Enjoy it. But keep it responsibly. Just don’t expect me to love it too.
Allison Rushby is the Australian author of 11 novels in the genres of women’s fiction and young adult fiction. She is writing a travel memoir and blogging here. You can often find her procrastinating on Twitter here.
Are you a dog owner? How do you feel about other people’s dogs?
Comments
377 Comments so far
So, do dog owners have to have dogs on a leash unless it is a designated dog park/beach?
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Absolutely, that’s the law.
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OMG. Wow. That is not happening much where I live unfortunately. How do you ask someone who has let their aggressive dog breed off a leash at a children’s park, to leash it? I guess if they have let it off the leash in the first place, they have not a care in the world about the law, or anybody/anything else. Then what?
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It depends on the Council.
Our local council requires dogs on leads at all times unless designated dog park (which are listed on their website). The next Council to our south allows dogs off lead anywhere so long as they are in ‘control’ of the owner. I think more councils are moving (or have moved) towards dogs on leads at all times
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Thank-you!
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Haven’t read the 187 comments – but I worry about dogs (as a non-dog owner) – mostly when they aren’t on leashes when they are out and about (I’m not talking about designated leash-free zones). I don’t care how friendly/wonderful/innocent someone thinks their dog is – unless they are in a private house or in a designated leash-free zone, they should be on leashes. I’ll take responsibility if I every bring my child into a leash free zone or my child pets a strange dog (or familiar dog) but I find it completely unacceptable where the law requires a dog to be on a leash for the owner to decide their dog is above the law FOR ANY REASON.
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I just did a whole course of dog school.. We were taught you can never trust a dog alone with a child. Even your own dog. They are an animal after all and you can’t trust what they ‘might’ do… children should never put their hand out to pat a dog they should let the dog come to them sniff the back of their hand.. blah blah. but I can’t believe people put so much trust in their own dog.. You just can’t..
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I hear you Allison. Dogs can be great, but owners can be really irresponsible. Its not OK to let your dog bark all night irritating the whole street. Its not OK to
let your dog jump all over people. Amazes me that people are quite happy to let their dog be a nuisance and then say “oh he’s so cute”. And that’s before we even get to dangerous scenarios. I like dogs, I don’t like irresponsible dog-owners who are too busy treating their dogs like surrogate babies to train them properly.
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And some people are so dumb. When people come up to me, or their children walk up to me and my dog, I say: “No! Stay Back! He will bite you!” , and hold my hand up in the classic Stop or Stay Away pose.
and yet people STILL keep walking towards us!
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Sure people should listen if you’re saying “stop he bites”, but why on earth doesn’t your dog wear a muzzle if you know he bites? This is a disater waiting to happen and its not enough to say “I told you so” after some child has been mauled.
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Will your dog bite anybody walking by or just people who try to pat it? I’m not sure how I’d feel if I was walking down the street in one direction and a person walking with their dog towards me from the other direction gestured and spoke to me like that? I’d be thinking maybe your dog needed to be muzzled in public.
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I have a very small dog, who is very afraid of small children and at times yes bites. When people come up to pat her I explain she isn’t friendly and please don’t pat her, this doesn’t stop people though. Then it becomes my fault when she bites. My dog is fine if you she’s on a lead and won’t bite if you just walk past or stop and chat, however people insist on patting her, I don’t get it, even though she’s cute please don’t approach! She’s scared and I’d really prefer everyone is safe.
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I agree with soooo many of the comment below. I have a sweetheart of a dog (Cav x Bichon cannot recommend them highly enough!!!) and I’m slightly embarrassed to admit he is my baby, my partner and I do tend to sook over him an unreasonable amount. As a result thought he loves people and he adores children. He’s a bit weird around babies so as a result I don’t let him near them. As a puppy, children made him very over-excited so he has been trained to sit a soon as anyone comes near him as a precaution.
The biggest problem is parents who think it’s ok to use my dog as their child’s first introduction to a dog without asking me. He hasn’t ever bitten anyone but I can’t guarantee that he never will so please please please ask before you pat him or any other dog.
The same applies with dog owners. When he was very small he was repeatedly nipped around the face by a black sausage dog, the owner kept saying that’s just how dogs play (after owning dogs/being around them since I was born I know this NOT acceptable play). Because of this he is scared of black dogs when he first meets them. He is much better now but previously if on ran at him he would freak out an jump into my arms. If he had a more aggressive personality he would have attacked them. But because I know this he is kept away from dark coloured dogs unless they are introduced by the owner, I just can’t guarantee his response.
I believe very strongly there are no dangerous dogs, just dangerous owners. Just like there are no dangerous cars, just dangerous drivers. If you are going to get a highly strung dog you need to undergo the training with your dog to control them.
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No annoying kids, just arrogant self-entitled parents
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“I believe very strongly there are no dangerous dogs, just dangerous owners.”
if you’d ever been attacked by a pitt bull, i feel you’d see it differently…
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Have you been attacked by a Pitt Bull, Shanny? You’ve got more chance of being in a car accident than being mauled by a Pitt Bull – they just have a bad name because of the few cases we’ve seen on the news. Most people wouldn’t even be able to recognise a Pitt Bull….quite often Staffies and Bull Terriers are mistaken for Pitt Bulls. Even the photos on the news are usually not the right breed….they’re most often a mix of breeds and in the hands of idiots who think it is cool to have a guard dog and shove them in the backyard with no interraction with humans/dogs (except in a cage fight). The hospitals would see more cases of Chihuahua bites than Pitt Bull bites. Alot of it comes down to the environment the dog is raised in. Socialisation is very important for dogs no matter what breed. And that is the responsibility of the owner.
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Good comment Anon. ‘Pitt bull’ has become the default breed to blame when people dont know what sort of dog was involved in something bad.
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you’re right, it was a bull terrier. my bad.
) i think it would have caused less lasting damage…
anyhoo, you may be right about the chiuhahas, but if one rushed myself, my leashed dog, children, neighbour and his bichon frise in a park and tried to rip the bichon to shreds (thank the fates he got to the dog first
i’m a big doggie fan btw
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No worries Shanny, I getcha. Hope the Bichon got out ok
Scares me when the dog owners aren’t around – you literally have no idea what the dog is capable of. I’d much rather deal with a dog owner over a dog that is roaming around on its own. At least they can try and restrain the dog if things go pear shaped.
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My daughter’s bestie (as a teenager) had a purebred pit bull who was quite placid, but my god he was a good guard dog. He nearly cleared a six foot fence to try to get at the pool maintenance man when it was just my daughter, her friend and the dog at home. They didn’t train him to be a guard dog either.
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I can totally appreciate your comment, however my concern with dogs like Pitbulls, Staffies etc they have a jaw that locks and it is near impossible to unlock once they bite into something. My concern is yes if a small terrier attacked you would have injuries however if a Pitbull bit a small child you have great difficultly in getting the dog to let go.
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God I hate this argument “The hospitals would see more cases of Chihuahua bites than Pitt Bull bites.”
Yes but a chihuahua can’t KILL you, you can fight off a chihuahua. When a pit bull gets its powerful jaws on you, you don’t stand a chance – that is the difference.
Pug owner
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Oh wow, this is an issue that is such a deep and abiding bugbear for me. I have a lot to say, but will try and keep it short!
This article has seen an outpouring of good dog-owners, describing the various ways in which they and their dog/s are good. That’s what articles like this tend to do – draw out those who are already doing the right thing. I can tell you right now that no one from my suburb has commented on here And unfortunately, I don’t think those who need to hear the message will be reading. But good on you for writing this Allison, hopefully it will encourage a few irresponsible dog-owners to shape up! Btw, hubby and I were amazed at the level of dog-ownership in the UK – dogs in the pubs, including when food was being served, golden labs tearing their hotel room apart while their owners were downstairs breakfasting…amazing!
There is so much “deed not breed”, “blame the owner not the dog” rhetoric around at the moment. It drives me nuts, because the biggest problem we have with dogs in our area is that the owners (and these dogs do have owners) are nowhere to be seen. It’s very hard to have a constructive conversation with the owner when you only have the vaguest idea of the dog’s address (other than my frontyard). It’s really rare to see a dog on a lead in our area, even though all public footpaths require dogs to be leashed, and all childrens’ playground require that dogs are kept at least 10m away from playing children. I’ve seen it all. Cars banking up while the owner let his 3 unleashed dogs dawdle across the road, including one who was so ancient and asthmatic he had to stop for a rest halfway across. Chased down the hill (pushing baby in pram) by a big (but probably friendly?) husky…who it turns out has a history of getting loose. An owner very carefully constructing a little cairn of bark chips over his dog’s poo in someone’s garden, rather than just pick it up. Walking around the corner smack-bang into a giant mastiff-looking beast who had just escaped from his yard. At least 3 dogs in our street who regular wander around, unleashed, no owner in sight, lying in the road and crapping on everything. Owners who think I’m nuts because I give their unleashed dogs a wide berth when out pushing the pram – “Don’t be scared! He won’t bite!”
The best? My then 17-month old daughter being rushed by a dog at our very own front door after we arrived home one day. Our city has a general “no front fence” policy, which doesn’t help matters. And we live in a “nice” suburb! I’ll never forget her scream – and she will never need to be taught not to approach a dog, because she learnt the hard way. My son may be a different story however
I used to love dogs, used to continually pester my parents for a new one after our dog died when I was 6, used to walk dogs regularly for the RSPCA…but in all honesty, the experiences I’ve had while out walking with my tiny, vulnerable, toothless (human) babies, my feelings have changed.
Hmmm, this actually sounds a lot more negative towards dogs than I intended it to be…but I get the sense from a lot of the responsible dog-owning posters that there’s a level of disbelief that so many dog owners are irresponsible, so just wanted to chare some of my experiences.
And as as a final plea to other commentators – please, please, please stop likening children to dogs!
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We’ve recently put in a complaint to our Council about the number of dogs that are going around loose, and they just wrote back saying they only have one patrol and he doesn’t work on weekends. Huh?? So basically, they don’t care.
As a jogger I often get chased by dogs which sh*ts me, especially if they become a trip hazard. or are hell bent on nipping at my ankles, and actually this week we’ve been looking after a friend’s dog (whole story in itself but won’t go there), and whenever we’ve taken it for walks we’ve noticed all these other loose dogs that come and attack. Surprised more people with babies or toddlers don’t complain as it’s a much worse worry for them.
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A short length of flexible piping is easy and light to carry. A whack with the piping will sting the attacking dog but not harm her/him permanently. No use with a very aggressive dog but with middling aggressive ones may work. Carried on on every walk with my dog when I lived in a suburb with too many roaming dogs around.
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I’ve complained too, and got the standard spiel about 4 rangers to police 100,000 dogs etc. They are powerless to do anything unless you have the dog’s address so that they can go and visit the owner. Which as I said above, is difficult when the dogs in question are out on their own painting the town brown. To be fair though, I did see the patrol van a couple of times when I was out and about after that call, so I choose to give them the benefit of the doubt on that one!
I’m surprised too that other people with babies and toddlers don’t seem to have a problem with it, perhaps they just stick to shopping malls. I don’t walk as much now that the kids are a little older, but I did walk a LOT.
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Take photos of the behaviour and present that to your council with your complaint, they have to take action when there’s evidence proving the complaint. We did that to a woman who always walked her dog of leash, one day it managed to rush past me when I was opening my gate to enter my yard and had a barney with my dogs. We reported the incident, took photos the next day of her walking her dog off leash (again! Even after the fight with my dogs!) and went to the council, she was fined $200.
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Ditto to Alison’s piece above. I too love animals – I’ve been a cat owner my whole life. Having said that I do think some dog owners need to be more responsible for their pets’ actions eg jumping on children, chasing petrified children & bringing pets to parties, parks, beach etc. I too am over it!
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Fair enough, at least this article isn’t blaming the dogs themselves. As a dog owner I think the title is a bit harsh though. And can I say this is not exclusive to dog owners, people are dickheads across the board regardless of whether they have dogs or not. I also have cats and yet other cat owners annoy me when their cats are in the street yowling all night, causing my dogs to bark at them for what can be hours. But hey, swings and roundabouts.
Meanwhile I will do my best to be responsible as a dog owner, as always. I know my dogs habits and I know their personalities. And if I ever have kids I will certainly be teaching them from a very young age about dogs body language and when It is appropriate to approach a dog or not.
I was walking my german shepherd around an oval once and had a group of kids come up and ask if it was okay if they walked with us because they thought she was a cool dog. I thought it was great that they asked politely first rather than just running up and trying to pat her (not that she would bite or anything, she is ridiculously – to the point of probably being a crap guard dog – social, and loves kids). Then we got to have a conversation about different kinds of dogs and when it’s safe to approach, how to know if they are not going to react nicely to you etc. If all kids were like this the world would be easier for us dog owners who are on the recieving end of “untrained” people.
On the flipside I’ve had my pit bull bailed up by poodles who were off-leash so I do understand that some dog owners are not very responsible.
I wish we needed a licence to own dogs, and that all dogs were required to be sterilised and chipped unless owned by registered breeders. Oscars Law!
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Sami – in relation to your last point, that must depend on the state/council, because in some places that is exactly the rules.
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I am not a dog owner as an adult but as kids we had several dogs. I am now a mother of two small children. The comments where people are comparing children behaviour to animal behaviour really annoy me – seriously, in the pecking order of things, I will always put my child’s, my husband’s, my friend’s, pretty much any human being’s welfare above an animal!
A few incidents influence my thinking on all of this. When I was 12 we had a dog that bit a neighbourhood child on the back after this kid had thrown stones at the dog. Police called, my whole family devastated so we did the right thing and moved the dog on to friends who lived out of town. When I was 16 I was walking up a street when an Irish wolfhound that I knew (babysat for the family) tried to start playing with me. I stood absolutely terrified while it scratched my back, legs and arms. Only when I started calling out did a neighbour come to my rescue. Fast forward to last week when my one year old and I were at a friend’s house and she pulled the tail of the small family dog. He turned and snapped at her arm. I have to be really careful with her as she has no idea how to play gently with cats and dogs.
So from all this experience I NEVER trust dogs around my kids. Even if I know them really well. Even if they are “great with kids”. It would just take one second for things to get ugly. You can’t always be sure what is going on in the heads of little kids or animals.
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Don’t get me started on the parents who bring their dogs into the school grounds. Nearly every newsletter tells them that dogs are not permitted, but they still do it. Drives me nuts. I love dogs, but have a child who is a little weary after a huge Irish Wolfhound that was tied up outside the library lunged at him and barked in his face. The owner then told us we had walked within a foot of his dog (so it was our fault), and that his snookum wookums suffered from separation anxiety. The library staff were fed up with him and called the council.
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I am still fuming about the owner of two rotweillers who let them off the lead in the tiny, fenced kids playground near our house. She didn’t even have kids, just brought the dogs to a crowded playground. Most of the kids were under five.
I asked her to put the dogs on back on leads at a minimum, she replied she wasn’t worried about the kids hurting the dogs. Neither was I. I was worried about ME hurting HER.
My dog comes to the park often, but if anyone other than us is there, he stays tied to a tree out of the way. And he’s a fat, lazy cavalier king charles, non snappy, accustomed to young children, bred as a lap dog. But I just don’t think any dog loose with strange kids is a good idea.
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My child was attacked by a Golden Retriever owned by the wife of one of my husband’s close friends.
He was in hospital for nearly a week, 2 hour operation, they stopped counting at 25 stitches, and in a cast for 2 months over Summer (which meant no swimming during the summer holidays).
The dog was old and cranky and my 4 year old son picked up his paw to shake it and the dog went crazy. It took 2 men to drag the dog off and afterwards the husband admitted the dog used to snap at him if he touched his paws! WTF! Why wasn’t the dog put away during the BBQ knowing that small children would be around?!?!?
Fractured the friendship as these people didn’t even visit in hospital – too guilty I assume. I wish I had forced them to have the dog put down, but unfortunately was too caught up with my son in hospital. All dog attacks should be reported to the Police and let them decide whether the dog needed to be put down.
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Anonymous, I’m so sorry your son went through that. I can absolutely say that as much as I adore and love my dogs, if my dog had “gone crazy” and mauled my friends four year old, no matter what provoked the dog to do so, and as much as it would hurt me to have to do it, my dog would be euthanized. I would never, ever forgive myself if I were in that situation, there would be no words to describe how I would feel as an owner of an animal that did that. This is something I have discussed with my partner as our friend has a four year old daughter who always wants to play with my dogs, however, she never has as they are always locked away when she comes around and her father has questioned us about it, we explained its not because they’re aggressive but because animals are unpredictable and scars are forever.
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I had a small (12kg…) kelpie who liked to jump our 2m fences and chase people, cars, bikes and buses.
She was trying to chase them like sheep… nipping and biting. She also had aggressive tendencies. She almost attacked a man dropping off a skip at our house one day.
As much as I loved her (and she was never aggressive with us) I got her put down. The alternative was to have her tied up 24/7 and she would have hated it.
Some dogs are not meant to be pets, and a true dog lover knows that sometimes putting dogs to sleep is the best thing for everyone concerned.
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It makes me so sad when I hear tories liek this. Don’t get me wrong, I think you probably did the right thing, but I wish more people were educated that some dogs, mainly working breeds (collies, kelpies, cattle dogs etc.) are NOT meant to be suburban pets. They are meant to be farm dogs, on the run physically and using their very intelligent brains most of the day. They have been specifically bred to have huge amounts of energy and a strong desire to have a job to do.
Unless you can give them that, please choose another breed. Don’t plonk them in a backyard and think that the odd walk and teaching them a few tricks will be enought to stop them going completely stir-crazy.
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This. People need to think twice before they select a breed. Educate yourself before you bring home a cattle dog – or any other, as there’s certainly plenty of breeds out there, and they’re all wonderful for different circumstances. I had a neighbour that must have brought home five different dogs and then had each one put to sleep or taken to a shelter because he found fault with every single one. Mostly the ‘fault’ was that they were puppies and needed training. It makes me furious when people reject an animal just for obeying its instincts. Our governments need to tighten pet-ownership laws – and that should mean screening the family for suitability, not screening the breeds.
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I agree wholeheartedly.
Unfortunately, this little girl was a rescue. We were giving her a chance.
SOMEONE ELSE had got her and couldn’t deal with her and dumped her.
(Actually, all of my dogs are rescues
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I agree Jess. I would have my dogs put down immediately if they did that, no matter how much I love them. I would never forgive myself either.
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I’m really sorry to hear your poor son went through that and agree if the dog was old and cranky they should have ensured separation between kids and dogs.
However I have to say that – and NOT with reference to your story, just in general – unless it was a completely unprovoked attack or there was a history of aggressive tendencies leading up to an attack, I wouldn’t have a dog put down. Especially if the parent hadn’t been supervising the child. If the attack was provoked, I would still feel terrible and might everything I could financially and otherwise to help the recovery, but that’s it. If a child attacks another child as a result of provocation, I bet there isn’t a single person in the world who would suggest the attacking chid pay the ultimate price. It would be deemed understandable, or called self defence.
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Just want to clarify that my son was being supervised – he was standing 3-4 feet away from me! When we arrived the owner called to my daughter (6yo) who was stroking his back ‘Dont touch his back, he doesn’t like it!”. Obviously, based on the conversation afterwards the dog was old & cranky & didn’t like being touched. Knowing this why wouldn’t you put the dog away!!! The owner didn’t tell anybody what had happened but I made sure I did – other Mothers thanked me for letting them know. I have had a golden retriever myself & love them but I now have a very different reaction to dogs. I’ve been at Nippers & dogs off the lead have run up and snatched the kids’ sausage sandwiches out of their hands. Ridiculous! No dog takes precedence over a child!!!
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Maybe they thought telling your daughter the dog didn’t like being touched was enough of a warning to all of you! I wouldn’t let my children touch the dog after hearing that. In fact I don’t let my children touch any dog until we’ve asked the owners. Then you can talk about the dog being e.g. old and cranky, before anything can happen. And I stand next to my child, not a metre away, to watch for signs of aggression. Dogs give warnings before biting, like growling and snarling. And I remind my child to touch in ways that the dog doesn’t read as aggressive, and not to stare.
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What a long winded whinge of an article! Ill take the dogs side anyday
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Really? Please do explain why you are on the side of the dog that bites the hand of the lady who then requires skin grafts. I am fascinated to hear your logic.
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Well I will not take the dogs side and I’m sure if your child or mother was mauled by a dog it might be a different story. Tell that to the family whose 4 year old was killed last year. I love dogs but I love my children and family more so I am not happy when my children are snapped at by a dog tied up outside the video story while they are walking past and I made sure the owner was told that if I saw the dog again in public when it obviously bites I would call the police. Of course everybody says that their dog is gentle and wouldn’t hurt a fly but unfortunately history shows us that dogs can turn and kill and by then it is too late.
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Absolutely! Owners are charged with the sole responsibility of their dog’s behaviour but it would help to keep both people and dogs safe if people learnt how to behave around dogs.
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I’m a dog owner and loove dogs! But yeah not cool to let them run freely especially around kids. I have a gorgeous harmless golden retriever but still I wouldn’t let him off around kids and when I do let him off I monitor him and if he goes near people quickly rush over to check its ok (this is in off-leash areas).
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Agreed. I have a small dog who is getting on in years. he used to love kids but now he gets a bit miffed if there are too many around. I NEVER let him off his lead and I always tell children that he’s cranky so say hello but lets not touch him today. He’s never bitten anyone but its not something that I would risk either.
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Up until last year I had a labrador and a border collie cross and walked them everyday on the beach in a council-designated leash free area.
Both dogs were taught the following commands: Sit, Stay, Heel, In Your Basket and Drop.
I cannot recommend strongly enough that all dogs learn these basic commands. Between them, they prevented over exuberence, jumping up over visitors, returning to their baskets in another room away from visitors, staying safe and relaxed around me and strange situations, and so on.
Of all of them, Drop is the single best command they can learn. If you do it right, you can actually make a dog go from a run to laying on its belly within a couple of strides, before it bowls a young child or puppy over.
All these commands are taught in puppy school and dog obedience classes and it also teaches you HOW to command your dog – it’s surprising how many dogs ignore a voice that is highpitched or even pleading, when dropping your voice an octave works really well. We simply don’t know until a trainer points it out to us.
Sigh. I miss my lab. She died a year ago and miss her every day..
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as many commenters have already said- it’s also you’re choice to have children.
although I can completely understand your concern over dogs who are poorly trained and agressive when my dog was a puppy the amount of people who came up and just patted him or picked him up, without asking, astounds me. I wouldn’t just go up to your child and pat them on the head or give them a cuddle.
A few times the dog started to chew on their hands because he was teething and they were either offended (to which I said you should have asked if it was ok for you to interact with my dog) or thought it was adorable (to which I said , please stop I am trying to teach him that is not ok).
I would never take my dog to a childrens playground, just like i don’t expect children to be at a dogpark. furthermore I wouldn’t take my dog out if he misbehaved and embarrassed me, kinda like how you wouldn’t take your children out if they misbehaved…
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Why wouldn’t you expect children at a dog park? My kids come to the dog park to walk our dog. There is an assumption that if you have your dog off lead that you can control it and the kids are safe. The expression dog park implies an area just for dogs. It is a misnomer. Off leash areas are shared public spaces.
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It’s not a misnomer Caro, in my town we have a dog park which is completely fenced in with warnings about taking children into the area, empashising that it’s an area for dogs. Certainly some people will take their children in there and that’s fine but they need to watch their children so that I don’t have to stalk my dog making sure that he doesn’t go near the kid on the off chance he gets a bit over-excited. My dog is well behaved will sit, come and has never been an aggressive animal but I wouldn’t want to risk it. When children go to dog parks they need to be supervised just like when i go to an off-leash area (read: not a dog park, but a shared area), then it is my responsibility to ensure he is not going near any people and if so he does it in a friendly manner.
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If I didn’t take the kids to the dog park I couldn’t take the dog to the dog park… But I keep the youngest up in a backpack, and I have taught my three year old daughter the stop, stay and leave commands, and to come when called, so she goes ok
I do spend an awful lot of time carrying both kids around the park though. I don’t ever let them interact with dogs I don’t know, it’s too risky. But it’s my choice to bring them, so I don’t mind the weight!
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perfect example of children and dogs co-existing! Teach the child & teach the dog
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I agree with a fair few of the comments below – especially about it being a two way street in regards to child-dog interaction.
That said, I hate people who chuck the shits about my off leash dog (in a designated off leash dog beach) coming up and saying hello to their off leash dogs – and when I say hello, I dont meant jumping everywhere, i mean a sniff and a tail wag. She is four months old and is still learning. She is pretty good at coming when called and staying with us but occassionally she will run ahead to say hi. Dogs are ‘kids’ too at some stage and need time to learn their manners sometimes. That said – she is always leashed everywhere else and stays outside when we have guests. I have had many kids want to pat her as she has a ridiculous face (boxer) but she is in chew mode at the moment (sore teeth) and will mouth anything not nailed down.
Not malicious at all and doenst hurt but can frighten young kids.
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I was an early commenter on this one but after reading some of the comments….what I wanted to emphasise was the unpredictability of ALL animals. Be it dogs, cats, horses, cows. Even my crazy-ass fish are unpredictable – who sometimes nip me when I clean their tank (but not all the time!). I am bringing my kids up to respect animals, the right/wrong way to approach all animals and and trying to ensure that what happened to this writer’s mother (and too many others) does not happen to them. But animal owners have to acknowledge that no matter how much we do to ensure that this does not happen, their animal could still do something that is out of the norm. So at least put your dog on a leash and don’t roll your eyes if I ask you to do it. I promise I am doing my bit raising civilised kids – so you can do the same with your pup.
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My biggest gripe is people not picking up their dogs poo on their walks. Ive been known to offer a bag from my dogs lead when I see people about to walk off with no intention of picking up their dogs waste grrrr It really irritates me.
The other thing that bothers me is people in off leash dog parks getting offended when I tell my child not to a pat their dog. They insist their dog is fine with children and my child wants to pat it but after over 15 years working with dogs I know when a dog is sending out signals that doesnt want to be pat and I wont let my child go near a dog thats displaying signals like that.
Try explaining that to an owner who thinks their dog is perfect with children though, Ive actually had someone yell at me over it.
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Could we all learn to distinguish rein from reign?
Reign is what the monarch used to do, free rein is what you give your horse when you let it go hard or otherwise as it pleases.
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I saw in a post below, someone had written “pet” instead of “pat”. Isn’t that an Americanism or just a typo?
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I said “reign” on purpose.
I meant it in that context… although somewhat facetiously.
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Wow. I was going to comment on this earlier, but decided to wait & see what you all said.
A huge WTF to the people saying it’s entirely the dog owner’s responsibility to protect children from their dog. What the hell? You have a responsibility AS THEIR PARENT to teach them about staying away from all animals they aren’t familiar with, about asking about ones they do know and about how to properly approach an animal if given permission.
If your kid runs up to my dog screaming “LOOOK MUMMMY! ITS A PUPPPPPPPY!!!!” and jumps up and down, sticks their hands into her face and generally goes around behaving in a threatening way to the dog, then don’t get upset when I tell them no, and remove my dog from the situation (Yes this HAS happened. “She only wanted to pat it! Never mind Lucy, that lady is mean!” Seriously!).
Please don’t tar all dog owners with the same brush. I don’t want my dog to hurt your child. I don’t want your child to be scared of dogs. But I also do not want my dog, through no fault of my own, to be put into a situation where she feels threatened enough, by the unrestrained and unsupervised behaviour of your child, that she feels the need to growl or bite your kid. I WILL remove the dog from the situation if I see it starting to happen, and it’s not because I don’t like your child or that I am “mean”.
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I couldn’t agree more, it’s called Parenting,
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Say it again sister!
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Couldn’t agree more! I have had experiences before where my large 50kg dogs get swarmed by children who never seem to have been taught how to behave around dogs, especially a dog they have never met- pulling tails, trying to scare them, swatting them on the nose etc. I have also had a parent tell her child to (I hope jokingly) ride my dog (who has bad hips) and the kid cried when I wouldn’t let her! I am cautious about my dogs and will always ensure they are under control because it will be my fault when a little kid gets bitten after antagonizing my dog… Where is the parental responsibility and supervision? I’m trying to do the right thing as a responsible pet owner but surely it shouldn’t all fall on us?
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I have the same thing with my Pug puppy, kids swamp her at the park, without asking, grab her curly tail, she doesn’t like it and gets scared. Its a two way street, parents, and I am one myself, need to teach kids to ask first about patting dogs, above all its just manners.
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I have the opposite problem. I have two tiny adorable Chihuahuas who strangers seem to think they can pick up without asking me and who get knocked over by uncontrollable bigger dogs in the dog park to the point where I now only take them there when there are no other dogs around. I don’t think it’s dog owners as much as just generally rude and inconsiderate people
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The same with my Cavs. They just assume, and it’s so frustrating.
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Dog owners need to be responsible for their dogs and follow council laws just as people and children’s parents need to be responsible of their behaviour around dogs. I agree with the author that dogs should be kept on a lead and not be imposed on others outside their dogs’ home or outside of council approved dog exercise areas, and the dog’s personal space needs to be respected too.
As a volunteer at a dog shelter, I often see dogs that have had a hard life yet they all have the most lovely dispositions – not one of these dogs has ever made me fearful of them. That being said, any and all dogs have the potential to hurt someone (including unintentionally) and people who interact with them need to be aware of this. I was bitten just over a week ago by a dog (despite all my training) yet I hold no grudge against the dog or it’s owner as I chose to interact with the dog at my own risk.
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I don’t not really see much value in this story. You can just change the subject matter from dogs to P Platers, builders, Police, politicians etc. and you have yourself another provocative little piece of writing for us all to get passionate about. Most (insert target) are responsible but some inconsiderate (insert target) are the worst thing ever because… Sure it stimulates debate, and I don’t have to click on these stories when it is clear the direction they will be heading in, but in the end this story provides only anecdotes and no answers. The author could have switched the tone and used her mothers experience to begin a debate between those with and without pets over the ways we can better interact with each other. Lessons could be learnt, friendships built and maybe a few problems solved. I do get accussed at times of living in a fantasy land where I feel that a lot of problems could be solved with a little chat. I am aware many will see this as boring way for everyone to write. What are blog sites without conflict? Informative? Thought provoking? Tiresome? I just feel that these ‘I know MOST … are great but let me tell you how much SOME … p*ss me off’ are getting a little old. Just a thought:-)
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Can I add that I do think it is great to see that so many people commenting below do move beyond the tone of the article to have constructive conversations. Now I need to stop as I am beginning to analyse this waaayyy too much.
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Thank you for this article and all the comments that follow. My partner and I are longing for a dog (once we move out of this apartment into a house!) and I had no idea about dog etiquette. I will be sure to follow it!
Just while I have all you dog owners here… any suggestions for lovely, calm, obedient breeds? I know it depends on the individual dog but we are torn.
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You will never get a dog that is completely obedient. Cavaliers are great family dogs, as are Bichon Friese, and also Golden Retrievers. They all need consistent training though. Good luck!
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I can highly recommend Golden Retrievers! Labs too. It depends on the size you want and the lifestyle you have. I think the most important thing is to start training early, whichever breed you end up with. Puppy school, obedience training, consistent discipline is all really important. Good luck xx
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Labradors are very predictable dogs in terms of temperament. It’s very rarely that you will find a Labrador who’s temperament is not completely people-oriented. They can be VERY energetic and chew loads of stuff when they’re puppies but they’re very clever and easily trained and are excellent family dogs. With ANY dog you decide to get, you just need to put in plenty of time and effort and love and that way your dog should be a lovely companion.
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I have never heard a bad thing about King Charles Cavaliers and as a dog owner who spends an hour every day socialising my staffy with other dogs at the dog park I have to say I have never had a bad experience with a Cavalier. Apparently they are beautiful family dogs and very child friendly. As always, I think any dog will reach its full potentially if exercised for an hour a day, loved, disciplined and taught to socialise with all types of people and animals from a young age. Best of luck – dogs bring so much joy to life and are amazing companions.
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Second this – love love love my cav! He is the calmest, quietest, cuddliest, sweetest dog I’ve ever had. (Not the brightest… but he goes ok
can win them all!)
We have had a delightful German Shep, too, but you need to be a strong leader to have a well behaved shep, so perhaps start with a more malleable breed.
We are getting a bulldog next saturday (I can’t wait! She’s adorable!) and they are a good low maintenance breed if you can fit in a very long walk every day – they just need a brief outing for fresh air, interest and a leg stretch, not a huge energy burning run.
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Can I recommend you attend Puppy School and then maybe a term or two of Dog Obedience (then continue if you like it, personally advanced training is not for me).
For first time owners its a really great way of learning all the basics, and what is expected of you and your dog.
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I have a gorgeous dog Cavalier King Charles cross with a Bichon Friese. Low shedding, very calm and sleeps all day while I’m at work. I know five people who have purchased the same breed after meeting my dog. And while he had training his temperament is pure luck of crossing two lovely breeds
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My cav sleeps so much that I make up stories for my daughters about him being a night time superhero, rescuing cats up trees and generally saving the world, as an explanation…. I’d hate them to think he was just lazy
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We have a beautiful cocker spaniel. He is very obedient, eagar to please, loyal and incredible with our 15 month old son. That said he does have lots of energy and we did put lots of time into training him when he was a puppy and we make sure that he gets plenty of exercise. I have also made sure that our son knows how to pat him (kids tend to hit rather then pat!) and respects his space when he is sleeping or eating.
It is important to get a breed that suits your lifestyle. When I was researching for us there was a survey on the RSPCA web site that asks you questions about your life style and then suggests appropriate breeds.
Good luck with your research. I love having a dog. He is well and truly part of our family and I couldn’t imagine life without him.
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Try greyhounds, they are very placid and beautiful dogs. They don’t actually need that much exercise. There are a few greyhound rescue places around that save them from being killed once they can no longer race, so maybe they are worth a look!
But any great rescue organisation will know the history of their dogs (as much as they can anyway) and the staff will have spent enough time with each dog to be able to advise you which are the more placid ones. This is a better option than buying from a pet shop/backyard breeder anyway, as you get a fully vet checked, sterilised, vaccinated and microchipped dog for cheaper than what you’d get from a dodgy backyarder. Not to mention the dog will love you all the more for rescuing them
…and if you REALLY want a puppy, there is no shortage of these at rescue organisations either
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I have a beautiful poodle. Small, smart, loyal, playful and best of all doesnt have the dog smell and doesnt shed hair everywhere!
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the best breed in the world .. a greyhound.
Quiet, loyal, non-smelly, fast, a lounge lizard that doesnt need a walk everyday, intelligent and easy going.
Contact the greyhound adoption program in your state..
We adopted Harper Aug2011 and now cant imagine our world without her. We have 2 kids under 5, 2 chickens and 1 cat, she gets on well with them all. On saying that, she is ultimately still a dog (and out thrird child!) and needs to be monitored when different kids are around – for their safety not hers.
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I a big Pug fan, goregous, loving, funny little creatures, but it all depends on your lifestyle. Dont just buy a dog because its cute or fashionable, get something that suits your yard, level of activity and available time. Ive got friends who bought a collie but hate exercise ??? they wonder why the neighbours are complaining about her barking.
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Most trained domestic dogs will only ever bite out of fear, but unfortunately it happens a lot because people reprimand their dog for growling – not realising they’re not teaching their dog to be nice to strangers, just teaching it to not give a warning if/when it feels threatened.
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I get so many of these people in my puppy school classes. Growling is truly a dog’s last warning sign. That why you get “silent assassins”
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Lisa, that’s a very interesting point. What do you think is a better way of handling the growl?
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Reassuring the dog, thanking it for its warning, protecting it from harm, and asserting your control over the situation (to the dog) so it doesn’t feel like it needs to take charge or defend itself.
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dear inconsiderate dog owners,
I know you love your dog but……………………….
I really don’t want to eat breakfast with them on the weekend at the cafe. I don’t want to spend $40 on a meal and have my feet licked, my butt sniffed or dog bowl water splashed around my ankles as I eat. Not only is it unpleasant for the people sitting around your dog but I don’t really believe your dog loves sitting on hot cement for an hour while you talk shit at the table.
I also don’t want to get up at the crack of dawn to go to the local outdoor fresh produce markets and have to navigate dozens of dogs while I select my fresh food. Trying to select a good cheese while having your dog take a big turd on the grass beside me because you can’t bear to go out for 1/2 an hour without them is rather selfish. Again, I’m not convinced your dog loves having hundreds of people crushed up against them as they try to navigate their way through the markets is their idea of a good time.
Yes, I am a dog lover, I really do love dogs. What I don’t like is people who feel the need to take their dogs EVERYWHERE with them, especially to places which are clearly not enjoyable to a dog.
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I agree. I am a dog lover, dog owner and have the potential to treat my dog like a child BUT it helps to remember that as much as they are beautiful, precious, intelligent, loving creatures, they are not human – and quite frankly, thank god for that! Dogs possess so many beautiful qualities which make them amazing companions (qualities which many humans don’t possess). Once again, they are not human. This means they probably don’t want to go shopping, wear designer clothes or sit at a cafe. They do want to play at a park, be exercised, get plenty of time socialising with other dogs and all of this an be done without infringing upon people who don’t like dogs or are fearful of them.
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I thought the same thing when I saw at least 10 dogs at the Anzac march in my parents hometown yesterday. Why on earth cant they stay at home for an hour?!?!!?
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Oooooh… I could say the same thing about kids.
Soooo often I’ve gone out to a restaurant or a cafe with my hubby, looking to enjoy a quiet, relaxed experience, only to have it spoiled by kids running mad, screaming, yelling, bumping into our table.
The cinema is another one. I don’t even go to the cinema anymore, because I got so sick of parents taking small children to the movies and letting them talk through the whole thing (ESPECIALLY in films that kids shouldn’t even be seeing anyway!)
You know what? (And this is going to sound terrible) Kids, and their parents who don’t control them, annoy me.
Kids don’t belong in restaurants or cafes. Take them to McDonalds. If you want to go out for a meal, get a babysitter.
I don’t think your kids enjoy being made to sit down quietly for a couple of hours while you eat, and drink. (I mean, obviously they don’t because they are running around making a racket).
(I wish I was being ironic here… but I’m not. It really annoys me.)
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I am SOOO with you. At a cafe, I will take dogs over kids any day of the week. Actually in any situation, really.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jiazZhXyIa4
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Yes Diana, we know, you don’t like kids.
Or parents of young kids.
You tell us all the time.
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That’s actually not true. I dislike bratty kids and overly-indulgent parents. Of which there are an abundance.
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There are also an abundance of nice kids and attentive parents.
It’s a shame you only seem to see the other kinds and tell us about it all the time. It always sounds bitter.
It would also be helpful to remember that you might see a child who is 80% nice when they are having their meltdown for that week/month. We can’t all be perfect all the time. Kids and parents included.
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The same can be said for non-owners. I have had people literally pick up my Cavalier out on a walk while we are waiting at street corners. Not even asking. Just assumed that because of her breed, that they can just come and grab her. Drives me INSANE!
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Is there something about children that spooks dogs? Their height or something?
I remember being chased by The Monster Dog all the way up my street as a child haha. I can still feel the gumnuts imbedded in my feet as I ran, fearing for my life, barefoot on the pavement. Ahhh memories lol I still adore dogs
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I think there is something about children that spooks dogs who have had a negative or not much experience with kids. My vet put it down to a dominance thing when I asked her about my dog with children, cos they’re smaller than him he thinks he can push them around where as he knows us bigger humans are boss. That’s just one experience though. I think others are frightened by the fast, excitable nature of some kids?
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I think it’s because children can behave quite unpredictably and just change from being calm and quiet to loud in seconds.
My poor dog is terrified of small children and it’s because she doesn’t know how they’re going to act or react.
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I think it is their height. Dogs will generally think they can dominate someone smaller or as small as them. Coupled with the unpredictability of a small child scaring a dog and it’s no wonder they get attacked.
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Agreed, I have a small dog (on leash) and the number of big dogs off leash (or onleash but unable to be controlled by their owners) that have attacked my dog in public, makes me scared to take her walking, especially with my child – and the dog owners always tell me that theirs is friendly (while I am desperately trying to keep my dog away from it)… and then it attacks!
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My big dog has only ever been bitten by small dogs – Jack Russells and Chihuahuas.
I find the best thing to do if my on-lead dog gets attacked by an off-lead dog is to drop the lead. Leaving it on-lead prevents it from submitting which only contributes to the on-going attack.
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Just thought i’d share an anecdote for all the parents out there who have to deal with kids and dogs.
My golden retriever was on his leash out the front of the local shops. I was walking back to him but was still about 30 metres away when I saw a toddler walking over to him. He is a gorgeous placid thing but I could tell he was frightened by this little stranger.
I ran over to intervene but the little girl got there first and clumsily patted/hit him on the nose. He gave a frightened yelp and looked like he might snap, but by that time her mum and I had both walked over.
The mum said to her daughter “you can’t just touch a dog without introducing yourself, you will frighten him” and, with my help, we showed her how to hold out her hand to let the dog sniff her. My dog sniffed her hand, gave her a tail wag, then she gave him a much more gentle pat.
My dog loved it, the little girl went away laughing and all was well.
I couldn’t help but be so impressed with how the mum handled the situation. If she had freaked out and yelled at me or the dog she might have made her child cry or become scared of dogs, but as it was, she taught her daughter a really important lesson and everyone went away happy!
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My son once asked a dog owner if he could pat her dog, she said yes and he patted the dog very gently )he was 10 so old enough to know to be gentle). For some reason the dog snapped and but him. Not hard but he drew blood. The dog owner was mortified and shocked. She could not apologise enough and she shouted at her dog. My son was okay, in fact 100% fine apart from a tiny mark but all he was concerned about was that the dog not get into trouble.
I think if dogs are in foreign territory (this was outside a restaurant on a busy street) then they should not be patted at all. Just be left alone and admired.
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So true! The other thing I have noticed is that if the parent’s don’t know how to react to dogs and are scared when there is no reason to be, then the children end up reacting the same.
I’ve had to educate so many parents with children who come to our local dog park about how to interact with dogs.
A good example is this:
If a dog comes running up to you and it is not barking or growling and it’s hackles are not standing up then it just wants to say hello, not hurt you. If your a parent you need to teach your kids not to run away in fear because that dog will simply think the child wants to play and will run after it, therefore making the child even more scared and the situation worse.
Parents need to educate their children about dogs and dog behaviour if they are going to take them into off-leash parks just as much as dog owners need to make sure they have put in every effort to train their dog to behave well.
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When I was a kid I was taught from a VERY early age to be gentle with animals and respect their space. If I whinged to my mum that the cat or dog bit me, once she’d established I was fine she’d ask what I had been doing before it happened. She was spot on- it was usually that I’d played too rough, or ignored warning signals and so on. It was a lesson. I guess that would be frowned upon these days. But why should an animal suffer or be put down because a kid isn’t taught how to interact? Of course animals can be unpredictable and sometimes genuinely vicious, but A LOT of these incidents could be avoided with a bit of common sense on the parents’ part.
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It’s so refreshing as a dog-owner to see people who know how to approach a dog. I have a rare-ish breed that a lot of people stop and ask about. I was once walking on a footpath and a mother and her daughter stopped to talk to us. The little girl said “May I pat him?”. “Of course!” I said and I put him in a down-stay and he relaxed and accepted pats from her. I was so impressed with this interaction. Complete admiration and respect from both sides.
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As a dog owner, I was scared to read this and the comments, I didn’t want to end up feeling sad and angry. But I must say, most people have been polite and reasonable, which is great.
In my experience, small dogs are often more trouble than large dogs, because their owners think they don’t pose a risk I guess. There are a few in my street that live in the front yard/garage, and run out at me & my (large) dogs walking past (on the lead). I also have a friend with a small, excitable poodle-cross, that jumps and licks. It makes it very hard when I go there with my baby, as I can’t put her down at all, and they won’t put their dog outside. When people come to my place, the dogs go outside, either all of the time, or until we’ve established the visitors are comfortable with dogs.
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MM team, just letting you know that there are around 6 comments below that I have edit/delete rights to and yet they weren’t posted by me.
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Thanks C, will let the techies know. That happens very occasionally! I trust you with your new-found power for now…
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I have 2 golden retrievers, both 2.5years old so still quite young and full-on. I get annoyed when out walking my 2, both on a lead and in control, when other people have their dogs off lead. By not having your dog on a lead, it’s free to come up to my two, circle them, taunt them, wind them up, etc, and whilst I’m trying to do the right thing, it can be hard to keep 60kgs of dog under control. Owners of small dogs tend to be the worst offenders and it drives me nuts!
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Oh, yes! I am with you Animal Lover.
A couple of nights ago I was out running with my dog on a leash. On the other side of the road was a big black dog trotting down the road. There was a guy walking in the same direction but you couldn’t even tell if he was the owner. Anyway, the dog saw us and bolted across the road to my dog. For a split second I thought “oh no” that guy must not own him….surely you wouldn’t let a dog walk off leash if they have a tendency to cross the road at the sight of another dog. The guy just casually crossed the road and said “what are you doing?” to the dog. I have news for you buddy, dogs don’t talk. I told him he is lucky he didn’t get hit by a car. One had passed a few seconds after he crossed. Anyway, this guy didn’t care – just shrugged it off. Stupid.
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To all of the responsible dog owners out there who keep your dog on it’s leash, put it outside when people visit, teach it basic obedience, pick up after it, keep it fenced in the yard, keep it away from people when they’re walking past, and who keep it away from children, thank you, I love you!
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As a dog owner, my gripe is with the general public who touch my dog without asking. She is perfectly friendly and LOVES people, however, she has always been nervous when kids RUN up to her and get in her face. It scares the crap out of her. She is not aggressive but I can read her body language and being a Border Collie, her instincts tell her to nip. I should add, she has never nipped anyone because I remove her from the situation. This is very rare, but it happens at least once a week at the park (kids come up to her). Kids are well-meaning but they chase her and they are rough. I actually have to tell kids not to touch her when their parents have encouraged them to “go pat the dog” because I know that I will be at fault if she ever nips a kid. I am quite certain that I could be let off in a kids playground and she would not be bothered as long as kids respect her space.
Having a dog that likes her personal space has taught me a lot about dogs in general. Kids should be taught to ask before they touch. Equally, dog owners should not overwhelm people with their dogs. I would never do that….that is just ignorant.
My dog has a beautiful nature so I can’t comperehend those dogs that run from their yard and attack people for no reason. I believe that just like people, you get good ones and bad ones. Training helps, yes, but there’s always going to be some inexplicable cases. The judgemental side of me blames the owners for locking them in the yard all day, every day. My dog goes to work with me (personal trainer) and gets to run around the park for most of the day. Some dogs aren’t so lucky.
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That is why it is so important that parents teach their kids proper dog etiquette – although obviously some of the parents need to brush up themselves. Every time I walk past a dog with my sons I will remind them that they can look at the dog but they mustn’t touch unless they have permission. Occasionally if the owner mentions that we can pat the dog then we will go through the process of how to do it correctly. My main concern is that my children are kept safe and learn to respect dogs rather than fearing them.
I can’t believe people will touch dogs without asking – you wouldn’t do the same to a person (unless you are pregnant, of course, then your belly is public property lol)
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Lol loves2bake, so true about the belly.
Fortunately I mostly come across Mum’s like yourself who have taught their kids to ask first. My dog is not even 2 yet, so I often joke with the parents that our kids are the same age and both parties are impressionable. It’s better to facilitate the encounter to make sure it is positive for everyone. Trust is a big deal to kids and dogs.
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I am really sorry you have had a few bad experiences
I am a dog owner, and quite frankly I am sick of a lot of other dog owners too!
We live in an area with a very large dog-friendly off leash area. WHY do people who cant control their dogs think its ok to let their dogs off to harass, chase etc.. all the people whose dogs are off but are well behaved and just walking along minding their own business.
The amount of times we have to stop and wait because someone elses dog is chasing ours and wont return to its owner is ridiculous. To be honest, we are getting so sick of it we often just keep walking now. Hopefully they learn their lesson. Mean? Yes! But when your walks are delayed constantly you get rather over it!
RE: Kids and dogs. We get lots of pat requests for our dog. We refuse “sorry, she is just playing with her ball right now”, or pretend we didnt hear (haha!) because we cant trust that the way that particular child pats our dog will be ok and we are not willing to take the risk.
My last gripe is people with little dogs who think its ‘funny’ or ok that their little dog is barking, semi attacking my medium sized dog. Just because your dog is small, it doesnt mean that displaying aggressive behaviour is ok. If the positions were reversed they wouldnt hesitate to tut tut us, but dont seem to grasp that!
Hmm…looks like this is a topic im rather passionate about!
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Isn’t the idea of the dog park for the dogs to run and chase one another??
It’s also about socialising dogs with one another. The need to approach, sniff and play with one another.
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Sorry, I wasnt clear.
This isnt a dog park I am referring to. Its about 10 km of off lead trail.
A dog walking in the opposite direction will start chasing my dog while its owner keeps walking in the opposite direction meaning they end up several hundred metres away when they finally realise their dog isnt coming back anytime soon, leaving us to stop and wait while they reverse to collect their dog.
Totally agree on the idea of dog parks with you!
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Yes, but you need to keep an eye on what is happening. It’s not that rare to see a game go from a mutual game of chase, to a non-game where the other dog is taking it too seriously, and it no longer becomes fun for both doggy participants.
Some dogs which aren’t socialised enough, or weren’t at the right time don’t always read the signals right.
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Em, totally agree on your comment about the owners of small dogs laughing off there aggression
Little dogs are always barking and growling at my big dog and I’m sick of it. They seem to be making most of the noise and the bigger dogs still get the bad wrap..
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I really hope that nobody in my area feels the same way as you. I live next to a dog park (I know you have used the term ‘off the lead trail’) but it sounds very similar as there is also a trail that joins several areas of lawn where the dogs play on.
MANY a time, I have had to stop and wait for a dog to return to its owner because it was busy playing with my dog or chasing me. But guess what? I don’t mind one single bit! I like to think of our community as just that – a community! Where we don’t mind pausing for a couple of minutes and waiting to help someone out. In fact, one time, an elderly lady had let her little half-blind Jack Russel go for a run around the park and after 20 mins of helplessly trying to get him in the car, I ran half the distance of the park to grab him for her.
I really do hope that most people in the park share the same feelings as me, rather than you.
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My dog weighs 5 kilos, so not too menacing. I am surprised at how rarely people try to pat him after reading this article – like, never! Maybe it’s too far down to reach him. I see the points you’ve made in the article, but it’s not something i even really have a problem with, and i find some kids can be pretty annoying/menacing, so perhaps could write an article from that perspective! I dont like this obsession with leads however, i almost never put a lead on my dog, he walks next to me all the time so it’s really not an issue – and obviously i never take him walking near the road – but if we’re walking along happily, i don’t think it matters (i’ve heard all the arguments against this just so you know). I have never once had him cause an issue, and people often comment on how well behaved he is. No one has ever told me he should be on a lead. He spent 10 years in a cage on a puppy factory so i figure he deserves a little freedom and love.
http://www.oscarslaw.org
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So glad you have rescued him
Oscars Law is so long overdue.
I often hear owners saying to their dogs “why cant you be well behaved like that dog?” (referring to my dog) hehe!
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thanks! it sure is long overdue. Sadly, he’s too scared to be anywhere but right near me, but certainly handy for walking him! They’re perfect dogs.
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Drat. I was coming in here ready to defend dog owners and be all RARGH, but I agree. My dogs haven’t got a savage bone in their bodies – that we have seen. For me, it’s too much of a risk to assume they’ll be okay in all situations, especially the younger one who tends to be nervous.
And off lead is never an option unless you’re in a dedicated dog park. You just don’t *know*
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Totally agree on most of the points in this article.
However a comment below mentions tying their dog up if people visit and want to go outside. Sorry, but that backyard belongs to my pup and if you’re coming to my house knowing that I have a dog then there is no way I would be restricting her on her territory just because you feel uneasy.
Go out the front. Simple
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Wow, just wow.
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Agree. It’s my house and my dogs live there. If I know someone’s visiting who doesn’t like dogs, I’ll put them outside, but I’m certainly not going to lock them in the laundry for hours or tie them up. If someone can’t deal with that, well no one’s forcing you into my home.
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Exactly. My dog is an outside dog, has been to obedience training and will sit lay, shake and wait on command. She’s a snuggler and usually just wants attention.
I would not let her into the house if someone was uneasy, however at 6 months of age I need her to be as socialized as possible. Therefore my family and friends know that if they’re around and want to be outside then she will be there. And to be honest after she finds out she’s not going to get pats or food she’s more interested in chewing her ball or laying in the sun anyway!
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I said it below…
) and generally doggied, come to visit.
but my dogs have total free reign of my house. The have free access, and two of them even SLEEP on our bed (although that’s actually only a new thing since I went back to full time work after a very long period of illness… Considering the biggest is 50kg and the smallest is 25kg, and my hubby and I aren’t small people, I’m starting to think we need a king sized bed, LOL).
Everyone knows the situation. Only people that feel entirely comfortable with being sat on (mr 50kg thinks he’s a lap dog), licked, “patted” (same dog… if he wants pats, he pats you
Admittedly that is generally just my family.
I don’t have Tupperware parties. I don’t have people over for dinner.
It doesn’t really impinge on our social life though, we just take people out instead.
I agree with the posters above. My house is also my dogs’ house. If you don’t like it, don’t come over.
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out of interest, would you be upset/offended if I said I didn’t want to come toyour house because of the dogs?
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Absolutely not.
Most of my friends choose not to come to my house for this reason.
As long as you didn’t give me a lecture on how bad it is to let dogs sleep on your bed or sit on you or lick you. Choosing not to be around my dogs will not offend me, but criticising my choices in my own home will.
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I have a friend whose animals have free run of everywhere, including visitors’ laps. I absolutely love going over there. Having a small being lavish you with affection without asking anything in return is beautiful. I don’t care one bit that I leave stinky and covered with hair.
I find kids gross and noisy but when I go to friends’ houses I know that’s what I’m getting so I deal with it. *shrug*
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I have two dogs and as a dog owner, I completly agree. At the end of the day it doesn’t matter how much you train them and how many people they are around…..they are still animals with animal instincts.
I don’t let anyone pat my dogs unless they ask first and I don’t pat or let my child pat other dogs unless the owner is asked first and the dog is sitting and behaving.
You never know what scent you have on you that they pick up and doesn’t agree with them that sets them off.
It’s the irresponsible owners that let down the owners that take the necessary precautions. It does my head in!
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Oh and I have two extremes of dog, my older one is 10 and was mistreated by a child when he was a pup, whilst the mother looked on and laughed until I intervened and asked the child if he would like me to hit him with a stick repeatedly and such is petrified of children. I now don’t take him out to public areas and walk him on lead around the streets at dinner time so there are minimal people around.
My other dog is a pug and is six months old. It is honestly frustrating that whilst I’m trying to train him and walk him the amount of people feel it’s their given right to come over and pat him and play with him even after I’ve asked them not to as it’s distracting and I’m trying to train him.
There are idiots everywhere and some of them happen to own dogs.
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I am over it too, trying to teach my 2 and 4 year olds to wave at dogs rather than go over to pet them is a nightmare. The owners are often insulted ‘my dog is great with children’ and then beckon the kids over to pat the dog. In which case I am portrayed as the psycho mum who has to haul the kids away. If we know the dog, that’s fine, but please, it’s easier for us to have a ‘don’t touch the dog’ rule than ‘this one is fine but that one is not’ when the kids are small. As much for the dog’s protection as for the kids! Having to explain that to each miffed dog owner is a pain in the neck too.
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I hate it when parents with kids approach me and my dog and ask for a pat.
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Ha ha, we won’t have met then! I’m the one over the other side of the park with my kids. We live in Singapore now and it drives me insane when people try to pat my kids.
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As a dog owner I agree. Even if your dog is friendly, little and with a good temperament you can never foresee how some situations might make them feel. My dog can be quite timid around large noises/a lot of people and I know these situations can make her panic and try and get as far away as possible. Which could mean biting a small child. You just never know
There will always be irresponsible animal owners but teaching your children how to approach/interact with animals will help from some encounters turning bad. Things like don’t look at an animal directly in the eyes, approach dogs with your hand in a fist so they can smell you first, be gentle, don’t go running up to animals, don’t shout etc.
While these won’t stop a vicious dog from attacking if their mind is set on it, it can stop those attacks that occur when a child gets over excited and/or an animal feels threatened or scared.
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some of us are actually terrified of other people’s pets. I like animals, I can’t bear to hear of someone being cruel to them, but please keep them away from me. A couple of experiences (when I was a child, my parents kept a dog that would snap at us — they thought it was funny) have left me really afraid of any dog bigger than ankle height. I know like and respect many dog owners, but irresponsible ones can be a huge problem
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My problem is more when strangers rush up to my dogs without asking first. Because they’re golden retrievers people assume that they love to be cuddled and patted. They do, but not by little kids they don’t know. Dogs are prohibited from certain areas for a reason, and I respect that. I hate it when loose dogs are running around, because they cause trouble. If I see kids with scooters, or prams, skateboards etc approaching I usually move my dogs off to the side to let them pass.
One of my dogs is terrified of children. This means that when they get too close she barks aggressively, which is terrifying for kids. For this reason I always tell approaching children to stand back. The dog is fine with calm children but is nervous around rambunctious ones, which are usually the kids who run straight up to pat the dogs when we’re out. So usually I let them know that the dog is scared of them and ask them to keep their distance.
The only trouble is sometimes parents are greatly offended by my declining to have their children pat my dog. It’s just that so many kids are excited to see golden retrievers that they can’t contain themselves. I really wish that more kids could be taught appropriate behaviour with strange dogs – to love them and not be afraid of them, but to always ask before rushing up one. Or just wave at them.
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I believe the onus is on you to keep your distance. Kids will be loud and playful, especially in a park.
I have a dog that is scared of other dogs, so is always barking and trying to attack if he sees them to protect us. It is our responsibility to pick him up and take him away from the situation and tell the other owner what is happening.
Parks are where children should be allowed to play and be loud. Don’t make them the ones at fault, take control of the situation and keep your dog away.
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Like I wrote above, I do remove my dogs from situations with prams, skateboards, etc, that I know are frightening for them. I keep away from children in parks and never let them off the lead. I meant when we’re walking down the street and it is impossible to remove your dog from the situation immediately. It is good practice to ask before rushing up to a dog on a lead. On the street, it is a two-way issue.
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How can she keep her distance if kids just come up uninvited? Kids love my dogs, and always race up to pat them before I can say anything. The only way I could keep my distance is to run everytime I see a kid approaching.
Kids should be taught how to properly behave around dogs, and if they aren’t capable of that then it’s just as much the responsibility of parents to make sure their kids steer clear as it is the dog-owners responsibility to keep their dog in check.
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I feel the same way. I have a dog who is well trained and placid, who is never without his leash in a public space and I take pride in being a responsible dog owner.
That said, my dog can be nervous around small children. Like the previous poster, my dog is fine with calm children, and even enjoys playing with them, and I’m more than happy to take a moment to crouch down, introduce the dog and talk about the dog, talk about the kids dog and so forth.
The kids who rush up unannounced, without asking to pat the dog, are another story. They are usually the one and same who pat the dog roughly, get far too close to his face, and don’t read the dogs obvious cues such as backing away, tail between the legs and so forth. Again, like the previous poster, I’ve had parents be terribly offended that I won’t let their child pat my obviously terrified dog, and even one charmer who shouted at me.
When I was a kid, I was taught to never, ever approach a strange dog,despite having grown up with dogs. For every kid that rushes up to pat my dog and squeal and shriek at him, I wonder why they haven’t been taught the same.
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If you own a dog, it’s your responsibility to keep it away from children, even children who are actively trying to pat it. Otherwise walk it somewhere there isn’t likely to be children playing.
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Kids play on the road in my cul-de-sac, anon, meaning I have to walk past them to get out of my street, they also play out there until 7.30 each night, based on your comment, I’d have to walk my dogs during the day while the kids are at school (and I’m at work) or not walk them at all. How would I avoid walking my dogs around children who are playing and running up to pat my dogs without asking permission in that situation?
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I’m not sure I follow the logic here.
It’s not just an issue of not walking where children are actively playing. It’s easy to avoid parks, playgrounds, their own front yards. However places like the streets and the shared driveway I have to walk down to reach the street itself, are places where seeing each other is unavoidable. I think there is a lot of value in teaching kids to be respectful and kind towards dogs, just as there is a lot of responsibility placed on the dog owner to take care.
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I have the exact same issue, Casey. I posted it below. It really bothers me that some parents don’t teach their kids not to pat strange dogs. I feel your pain!
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I am an emergency vet. I adore dogs. I have five of my own. And I 100% support this article. The world is full of dog owners who have NO idea at all about the management and behaviour of what is essentially, under the cute clothes, a wild animal. Dog vs dog attacks are one of the commonest admissions to our facilities. Occasionally we also get the dog versus human dogs in to- to be euthanased. I have a large, large dog who is the nicest boy in the world. But will I let him play unattended with my 4yo son? Never.
Dogs ARE great, but managed poorly they can maul, maim and kill.
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I think the heading should be “I’m really over inconsiderate dickheads” – whether they are people who hoon down our tiny residential street at 80km/h endangering our kids, the drunken halfwit who threw a full can of beer at my husband while he cycled home from work the other night, the sleazy “building site” types who make unwanted demeaning comments, the idiots who park across two parking spaces at the shops…
There are idiots everywhere. Some of them own dogs. The two are not necessarily connected.
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Agree, i actually find the title offensive.
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I think I have a problem. When someone admits they don’t like dogs, I can’t help but look at them strangely. I 100% don’t get how someone could not like dogs!
But I do keep mine responsibly. I only let her off-lead at the dog park, I keep her away from small kids when they visit, (because she likes to play rough), and I’ve invested lots of time in training. And I am slowly learning to be more accepting of cat people.
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I do not like dogs or animals very much. I have a problems with owners who expect me to adore their animals as much as they do. I respect their right to own animals please respect my right to ignore them.
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I absoloutly do respect your right not to like my dog. I’m just a little baffled is all. My cat-loving bestie feels the same way about me
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Hey C.J.
Here are my reasons for not liking dogs:
1) They are unpredictable, and some of us just don’t like that. What I would consider being frighteningly aggressive, you might just consider ‘playing rough’, which is fine, but how am I supposed to know which way your dog is going to go?
2) They maim people, and sometimes this maiming is passed off as just an act of play (like, ‘nipping.’) Obviously, this does not apply to all dogs. However, all dogs have the ability to maim people, and if you combine that with Point 1, I get a little shaky.
3) (Here comes the superficial reason) They are gross. They drool, they shed, they smell, they eat stuff that smells, they shit stuff in your garden that smells etc.
4) (And now for the hopefully redeeming humanitarian reason) Because, in world with finite resources, someone like Sharon Osborne is congratulated for rescuing 7 of her 16 dogs. WHY COULD SHE NOT HAVE FOSTERED A CHILD?! OR THREE?! The same goes for Ellen, always giving copious amounts of money to animal charities when 13 million American children are malnourished. I find the way in which people place pets above people a little unnerving.
So, if you want to know why people aren’t too into dogs, they are my own justifications. Oh, and that I can’t go to cafes with outdoor areas anymore because watching a canine being fed a $10 piece of slice by hand – by an owner who then continues to eat their slice without washing said hands – puts me off food for the day.
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haha! I’d apply most of those reasons to my list for not liking children
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Hehe. Same!
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lol! I hear you on the drooling!
On the playing rough thing…I don’t let her “play rough’ with anyone but me. And I am very quick to keep her away from anyone who is uncomfortable around dogs, or big dogs, or less than five feet tall. I have even leashed her in the off-leash dog park because her size was making a smaller dog nervous.
Just to be clear, I wasn’t dissing people who don’t like dogs. I owned up to this being MY problem. And I would never place a dog above a human being. I have a dog because I feel she enriches the lives of human beings (me and my family) not the other way around.
Also, I’ve never known anyone to pass of maiming as “just playing”. Dogs who main or seriously injure someone are put down automatically by the local council, and dog owners in those cases will be fined and may even face jail time. Anyone who didn’t take dog attacks seriously would be an idiot.
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I just think dogs are gross, for me touching a dog would be like touching a rat.
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Just curious, have you guys ever owned a dog? I would surprised if you had a family pet growing up and still likened them to a rat.
Dogs are beautiful creatures who provide copious amounts of unconditional love. I feel sorry for you – you’re missing out on something special.
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Yes my parents bought my brothers and I a dog when I was 10, and my grandparents have had 4 dogs over many years, we also had a cat and 2 budgies (I think birds are gross too, cats are ok, wouldn’t own one though). I can’t explain why I think they’re gross, they just seem like a really dirty animal to me. Thankfully my parents didn’t let the dog inside. Don’t feel sorry for me I know what I’m not missing out on, I prefer to get my unconditional love from my husband, children, family and friends.
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Fair enough.
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I let dogs lick my face.
I let STRANGE dogs lick my face.
Of course, the fact that I am aware of the properties of saliva, and the fact that you’ll probably get less germs from kissing a dog than kissing a person might be behind that.
Frankly, I think PEOPLE are gross.
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I’ve only just started liking dogs in the past year. I didn’t grow up with them and my only experience with them previously was with friend’s dogs who were smelly, left fur all over my clothes, drooled everywhere and seemed to constantly bark, beg for food and always be under foot (all indoors).
I now have inherited a ‘step-dog’ who lives with my partner and me and I realise that my previous experience was, unfortunately, with poorly trained dogs. After spending some time with a beautiful and well trained dog and having seen other gorgeous and well trained dogs at the dog park I now realise that most dogs are great and have become a bit of a dog fan!
I still can remember my discomfort around dogs before though so am respectful towards anyone who comes around or who we encounter whilst out for a walk.
We also never, ever have the dog off lead except a the dog park, that’s out of respect for the people who want to use the footpaths and roads around our house without having to worry about other people’s dogs, no matter how *friendly* ours might be. It’s simply not on.
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I am a dog owner and adore my dog. But I am a responsible owner. I dont take him to our local park because its full of off leash dogs whose owners use it as their chat time and ignore what their dogs do to other dogs and people. There is a designated off leash area with strict time limits and these are rarely adhered to. They usually just let them roam freely through the playground and the the bike track at any time they like.
My sons played rugby at the same park a few weeks ago and both their games had to be stopped, one of them twice, because 2 off leash dogs, big dogs too, ran into the middle of the field. Outside of off leash area and hours too mind you..
Dog owners are like parents. Some are good and some are terrible. Most just try and do their best. But the terrible ones are usually the ones who tell everyone they’re doing a good job, or are simply too arrogant to care. When one child comes to our house I have to lock our dog in the garage because she always tries to pull his tail and pats him heavily with a thump of her hand. I’ve told her repeatedly not to do it, but I guess if he bit her, mum would insist our dog be put to sleep, so I have to be the responsible owner and keep him away from her.
I still clearly remember going to watch one of my kids play sport and arriving at the field to have a big hairy smelly off leash dog jump straight up onto me. And leave muddy paw prints on my white jeans. The owner just looked at me, shook her head and said that was my fault for wearing white jeans to the park. People like that shouldnt be allowed to have dogs and give the rest of us a bad name.
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