In response to the idiot who says "good girls are like unicorns".

This article has been coming up a lot in my Facebook feed lately; it’s called, “Why Good Girls Have Become Unicorns”.

I clicked on it really quickly because I’m a total sucker for anything on the Internet that has the word “unicorn” included. The other day, I found a picture of a life-size rainbow unicorn cake and it was just about the best thing I’d ever seen – but I digress.

THIS particular article was not the best thing I’d ever seen. This was, in fact, just about the worst thing I’d ever seen, all packaged up in one relatively innocent-looking article with a nice picture of a girl on a swing.

It was written by a gentleman someone named Preston Waters, for a website called Elite Daily. Mr Waters claims to be the “ultimate man’s man for Gen-Y”.

From just the title of his article, you can understand what his general point will be: “good girls” are a completely non-existent, fictional mythical creature (or totally a real thing but just hiding in the forests surrounding Hogwarts… this all, of course, depends on your own personal beliefs relating to unicorns).

And why is this the case? Because all women have become crack-whore slurries.

I’m paraphrasing, of course. Mr Waters doesn’t *actually* say that but he does say many more other offensive things in his long-winded article.

To sum it up quickly for you – Mr Waters claims that women these days have no respect for themselves. He admits that he likes to “take advantage” of women who are happy to have casual sex with him. But he’s desperate to meet a woman who has some level of intelligence – who can hold a conversation, who can think for herself, who is not taking Instagram pictures of her boobs to impress da boyz, i.e. a unicorn.

However, Waters admits that when he DOES find unicorns, he finds them boring. So he cheats on the unicorn unfortunate woman unlucky enough to be dating him:

It’s like a double-edged sword. You realize it wasn’t getting the unicorn, but rather attracting something you thought never existed. It always is about the chase and never about the perfection of the woman. And that is the mindset of men in the 21st century.

Here are some of my favourite sentences, extracted from the article:

“Sure women have become independent, which is a great feat and should constantly be encouraged, but… with every pro there happens to be a con, and the con here is that most of these women have completely lost all respect for themselves, and their morals along the way.”

“We sometimes even joke that our future wives are currently in Kindergarten because it is comforting to know that she is currently playing with blocks and not swinging from dick to dick because they sell her a good enough story.”

“Men are going to want to settle down with a good girl… The older you get, the more you realize that it is a fantasy that doesn’t actually exist.”

Waters’ general conclusion? That at the end of the day, all men just want a female who is on the street and a freak in the bed… but “most girls are freaks everywhere, which leaves us with fewer options when trying to settle down”.

Ugh.

Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.

I really wanted to think that Mr Waters is just trolling everybody for the sake of trolling. But unfortunately – judging by the reactions of some who are sharing his article – some men actually dare to agree with him.

There are a thousand issues with this article. But for me, I’m mainly concerned with the perception that all women can only fall into one of two categories: the virgin, or the whore.

In Mr Waters’ eyes, there is either the innocent Anastasia-Steele, “what’s a penis? No of COURSE I don’t masturbate!”, fluttering-eyelash, long-skirt-wearing type – or there is the girl whose number of sexual partners is reaching up into the triple digits while she parades around in mini skirts, flashing her vagina every time she does a “slut-drop” on the dance floor.

There is literally nothing in between.

There is no acknowledgement of the girl that has three degrees, including one in physics, and yet still had a threesome in a hot tub in Whistler one time.

There is no room for the girl who is fiercely intelligent but still enjoys wearing short skirts and going out on the weekend to drink wine with her girlfriends and flirt with boys.

There is no recognition of the girl who is an engineer at the age of 23 but still takes pole-dancing lessons every week. There are only one-dimensional characters.

Mr Waters – guess what? This isn’t Pride and Prejudice. There are no “good” girls and there are no “bad” girls anymore. There is no point in reserving future wives who are currently in Kindergarten (a really icky thought, by the way) just so she won’t be “tainted” by another guy’s penis.

This is 2013, and a world where sexuality and real life are increasingly colliding. Where women are allowed to do whatever the hell they want, because FEMINISM. If a woman wants to have casual sex – she can absolutely go for it. It doesn’t mean that she has lacks morals or respect.

It’s not okay to tell women that they should behave a certain way in order to score a husband. Just as it’s not okay for me to write an article telling men how they should behave in order to score a wife.

I wouldn’t dare to claim that there are no “good men” left out there because all of them are busy pushing their penises into anything that moves. Because it’s completely untrue – not to mention unbelievably simplistic and sexist.

One last thing, Mr Waters? Women aren’t objects, built to cater for your sexual gratification. They don’t need to change to cater for exactly what you want in a woman.

Especially considering you’re probably just going to cheat on them anyway.

Are you bothered by the term ‘good girls’?