So often it feels that life is dominated by the day job in addition to making lunches, supervising homework, cooking, washing and being someone’s wife and someone’s mother.
But it doesn’t need to be like that. One of the games I play with my son is Feel Good For Free. We take it in turns to come up with something that has no cost nothing but feels great.
I might start with “The feeling you get when you spy your child in the tide of children flowing out the school gate in the afternoon”.
He will come back with “The great feeling of jumping into a pool on a stinking hot day”
Me: “The feeling when an old friend calls you out of the blue for no reason at all”
Him: “The feeling when someone you love gives you a hug”
Like they say in the credit card ad, priceless
Inevitably, my “feel good for free” list gravitates to the bedroom. Years of sleep deprivation have given me a one track mind. There are scores of sleep-related feel good feelings in my favourites list:
- The pleasure of finally being able to flop on the bed after a long day
- The glorious comfort you get when you turn over a pillow and lie your face against the cool cloth of the reverse side
- The relief you get when you wake during the night and the alarm clock says there are still many hours until dawn
- The wonderful indulgence of freshly laundered high quality bed linen
- The joy of waking up naturally just before the alarm clock is due to sound
- The warmth of snuggling under the covers on a cold night
- The way watching the rhythm of a child sleeping melts your heart
And so it goes. Just as inevitably my son’s list will involve body fluids and functions. For him, priceless joy can be found in:
- Relieving yourself when busting
- Doing a really big poo
- Realising the hiccups have stopped
- Squeezing a pimple
- When the sneeze finally comes
- Someone scratching an itch you can’t reach
You get the idea. My husband never seems to be around when we launch into the feel good game but my guess is his happy place would come from merging the bed and the body fluid lists. Just saying.
It’s not what makes the list that matters. It is taking the time to think about it. Finding some joy in every day.
Where do you find the joy in your day? What are the free things that make you feel good
Susan Hetherington is a lecturer in journalism at the Queensland University of Technology and a regular contributor on 612 ABC Brisbane radio. You can follow her blog here and her tweets @snoozen







Comments
112 Comments so far
getting home at the end of the day to have a ball of fluffy excitement launch himself at me in a corgi-hug.
Followed by pinching wine out of mum’s cupboard and helping myself to a rather large glass.
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checking on both my boys each night and seeing them sleeping peacefully. Home, healthy, safe and content. Makes me smile
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* Watching my sons being in love with their wives and children
* Seeing the delight my husband takes in his inherited grandchildren
* Listening to the carolling of magpies
* Floating in the ocean with the sun on my face and the muffled sounds of seaside
* The adoration in my Beloved’s eyes when he looks into mine
* Taking off in a ‘plane to go on holiday
* Preparing a dinner party with love and watching the enjoyment of friends sharing food around my table
* A full body massage
* Standing fully under a really good shower
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Reading these made me so happy I shed a tear
Happy tears are the best for me
Wearing my boyfriend’s hoodie before he gets home
A perfectly made subway
When my nails are all the same length
Surprise morning sex
Exfoliating my legs
‘i love you’ texts
When my mum calls
When it feels like lunch time but knock off time already
Vegemite and butter on hot fresh bread
Yoga
Dancing all night long
Wrapping an awesome present
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wish I could have clicked a few “likes” next to some of these
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Stroking my 4 year old daughter’s little arms and legs while we are sitting watching TV. She hates it (“stoppit, mum!”) but I sneak in a touch every time I can… her skin is soo soft and those little limbs are just too adorable for words.
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When I walk in the front door at the end of a long day and get greeted by my exuberant 60kg dog who is always so happy to see me.
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Thinking your packet of m&m’s, maltesers (or similar) is finished and then realising there is one more inside!
Its the small wins
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Having a cotton bud on hand when the inside of your ear is itchy.
Happened to me in the middle of the night last night. Ah, the sweet relief!
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My 15 year old son telling me I’m an amazing mum and not being too cool to kiss me goodbye in front of his friends.
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Smelling that “Aussie Bush” smell
When my other half makes breakfast on Sundays
A soak in the bathtub, listening to my favourite music, with a glass of wine
Cooking a really yummy dinner, and there’s no scraps left on anyone’s plate
When my cat runs to me, meowing, purring, tail held high, when I come home
Having a “cuddle sandwich”, with bloke on one side of me, cat on the other
Watching a beautiful sunrise/sunset
Going for a dive and seeing a creature you’ve never seen before
Seeing a flame tree blooming in the mountains near my house
Crying happy tears
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Except for the cat, a woman after my own heart !
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Waking up at 7am and being confused about what day it is…then remembering it’s Saturday, rolling over and falling asleep again
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- the first coffee of the day, coupled with a still warm fresh muffin
- my hubby getting me cold water every night before bed
- puppy cuddles
and pretty much everything everyone else has said! So many AH! moments!
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When Clean Sheets Day and Fresh Legs Day (i.e. you’ve just waxed your legs) coincide. Mmmmm……
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similar to that, mine is the clean, sheets and fresh pyjamas after a nice hot bath
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Lying in bed with my head on my boyfriend’s shoulder and his arm aroung me.
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Waking up in the morning knowing I’ve made it through the night without getting up for a wee
drinking a cup of tea, reading a book, watching a movie uninterrupted
when both my girls go to bed and stay there on the first try
flying back to Australia and seeing my sister
sleeping at my sister’s house – it’s so comforting and I feel so loved and secure.
despite the washing up after, eating a meal my husband has cooked just for the two of us
an icy beer at the end of a hot day
swimming underwater and floating – both great feelings
hearing my girls singing while they play
laughing with my kids
receiving a birthday card in the post
smelling sun dried washing
drinking tea in the early morning sun
lemon tarts
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What a lovely list
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Definitely agree with the sun-dried washing ….. mmmmmm.
And the swimming (◡‿◡✿)
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On the way to prep this morning my 5 yr old telling me out of the blue ” mum your like rich and famous to me ” lol
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So many of the ones mentioned below, but I’d like to add a few:
* hopping into your car that’s been sitting in the sun on a cool or mild day and it’s toasty warm inside. It’s like the best warm hug ever.
* my 18month old giving everyone a kiss on the cheek, but only ever giving “baby” (my 33wk preggy belly) a raspberry instead and laughing histerically (which is of course contagious & no doubt the reason baby doesn’t get proper kisses)
* hubby talking to my belly while holding it & being rewarded with some monster kicks
* cupcakes
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* taking my bra off at the end of the day
* morning cuddles from my 4 year old son
* unexpected facebook message of love or encouragement from an old friend
* when my son tells me he loves me “all the way to the sky” and that he has “rainbows of love in my heart for you mum”
* seeing him excited about new things he has discovered at daycare
* reading a good book
* walking on the beach
* warm cup of tea
* when my jeans fit properly
* completing a uni assignment
* ugg boots
* polite customers who smile back and engage
* orgasms
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Yes yes yes to the bra thingy
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YES YES YES to the orgasm thingy
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I agree with so many of these, especially taking the bra off at the end of the day, especially when it is hot! Ah the feeling of freedom and release
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the sunshine’s heat drenching your hair and warming your scalp when you’re on a stroll
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The moment I give someone a completed quilt for no special reason other than the fact that I can!
Reading the hand-made Valentines Day card from my 9yo
Being told by my nephew that he loves me
Having my 13yo acknowledge me in front of his friends
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My dad was big one for taking your shoes off when you get home. So simple, but it really works.
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Waking up when you think it’s morning, and realising it’s still the middle of the night and you have HOURS left for lovely sleeping!
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Oh yeah! Love that feeling.
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Oooh great post!
Mum’s cooking (esp when she suprises me with my favorites!)
Capturing a moment in a photo that looks just as it was
Successfully cannulating (putting in a drip), in someone with notoriously tricky veins (this makes the patient pretty happy too!)
A hot, soapy shower after a big workout
A glass of icy cold wine on a hot day
A clean house
Getting out an ingrown hair (I know- gross. But oh so good.)
Lying cosy in bed and listening to the rain.
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When u let someone go in front of you (in traffic) and they “wave” to say thanks. Legend. =)
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~ seeing an old couple holding hands & still in love <3
~ wrapping presents at christmas time for those i love
~ getting in the car and hearing your favourite song on the radio
~ getting to the end of a good book & loving the ending!
~ waking up after a much needed sleep in & feeling really good
~ butterflies of excitement in your stomach when you're dating
~ walking past a cafe & smelling something delicious
~ excitement of someone's birthday coming up (family member or best friend)
~ getting a letter from a friend in the post
~ looking back through photo albums – good times
~ finding that thing you've been searching the whole house for
~ finally falling off to sleep after tossing and turning for hours
~ while out & about, running into a friend
~ hanging out a pair of jeans and realising there was a tissue in the pocket but somehow it didn't fall to a million pieces & ruin the whole wash!
~ popping into a bookstore or library & finding the exact book you are looking for
~ passing an exam with flying colours after studying really hard
~ seeing your kids grow up – their milestones
~ a storm on a humid stinking hot day to cool it all down
~ a ranbow after it's been raining
~ anticipation of hearing your favourite band's new album
~ someone you love telling you they have a surprise for you
~ getting right to the end of your 'to-do-list'
~ long bubble bath
~ LOVE the feeling of having my perceptions changed & seeing something from a whole new perspective
~ the smell of newborn babies
~ good news from a doctor in hospital
~ receiving lots of mail, but none of them bills
~ swapping recipes with a friend
~ creating things out of nothing
~ helping someone through a tough time
~ unexpected meals brought over from friends
~ karma coming back to shine on you
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Kerryn, that is a brilliant list! I feel happy just reading it
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Thank you for taking the time to write this.
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My milk letting down when I’m feeding junior.
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Love this post! Thank you Susan. Will be playing this game with my kids.
A good belly laugh.
Looking out at the sky and tree tops and loving the late afternoon colours.
Having giggles with my husband.
Kissing my children goodnight and saying “I love you” and them saying “I love you” back.
Sleeping through.
Helping my elderly parents. Talking and laughing with them.
Cuddling up with my dogs.
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When your baby smiles a smile so big their dummy falls out. Gorgeous.
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Oh what a gorgeous image, YES! That just reminded me of my babies too! thank you!
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“The relief you get when you wake during the night and the alarm clock says there are still many hours until dawn”
I love this feeling!!!
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I feel relief when I actually wake up to the alarm and not in the middle of the night!
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When I go in to my bubba after he’s had a nap and he smiles the biggest smile and waves his little arms and legs in excitement.
When my husband snuggles up to me in his sleep and I know he loves me even when he’s sleeping.
Spending time with my sisters, my mum and dad and/or my friends.
Singing while hanging out the washing on a lovely day.
Ice cold cider on a hot day
First cup of tea in the morning
Seeing my husband and son interacting.
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Lovely, delightful baby-giggles! Your photo just made me feel good for free
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“When my husband snuggles up to me in his sleep and I know he loves me even when he’s sleeping.”
That made me smile SO much, because it’s SO true. Thanks ladybird!
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Coming home after a long, shitty day and seeing my dogs happy tail wags and hearing my cats purr their pleasure at my arrival
no one can beat the enthusiasm and joy at your arrival like a dog can.
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A shower after being at the beach all day
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What an awesome game. First cup of tea of the day. Last cup. Random smiles from strangers. Hopping in front of the air conditioner/heater on hot/cold days. Neighbour bringing in my bin. Seeing a student make a mental leap. The list is endless.
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LOVE the neighbour bin thing. For us it’s the lovely man across the road, who also clears out our letterbox (moves it to a pile at our front door) if he’s noticed we haven’t been home for a few days. It’s just so lovely to have neighbours that care – always brings a smile to my face.
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Here’s a great way to feel good for free…
Everytime you or one of your friends likes this post and shares it, BUSHTV will pay Cathy Freeman’s amazing Foundation a gold coin. Cathy gave us gold and now its our turn to return the favour!!!
Please click here http://bushtv.give2x.com/?p=1378
February is Cathy Freeman’s Donor Drive for her amazing Foundation that works with the Indigenous children on Palm Island and we can all help! But we only have 24 hours left!! Please like and share the link to reach our goal.
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- Clean Sheets – Agree
– Finding a block of chocolate at the back of the cupboard I forgot I bought
– The first real smile from your children
– A phone call from a friend you haven’t spoken to for a while
– Laying on a sofa for an hour reading a book with no interruptions
– Being able to go to the bathroom without a child following you
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The Welsh have my absolute favourite word in the whole wide world and it’s “cwtch.” It basically means that really nice safe big hug you get from someone that makes everything feel alright.
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That’s lovely! Any tips on how to pronounce it?
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It’s pronounced kutch…..I say it much better after a couple of glasses of wine
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Wow – I want that! Haven’t had a hug in many years and this word alone makes me feel warm and happy!
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A big Happy cwtch to you Jo <3
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All the sleep related ones plus discovering that there is chocolate in the pantry that you had forgotten you bought (doesn’t happen often)
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the feeling of a steamy hot shower at the end of a …..well at any time really!
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Removal of bra at end of the day.
Thinking you have no food in the house and them remembering you have yummy left overs.
Checking your mail box and finding something other than a bill. Better still if it something you ordered online and had forgotten about.
Picking fresh herbs from the garden.
Going to your underwear draw and finding loads of your favourite undies to choose from (ie. not all in the dirty washing basket).
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Oh yeah! Nothing beats the feeling of getting that bra off!!!!!
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Ladies! Bras don’t have to be uncomfortable! Go and buy a decent bra that fits, spend some money on it, it’s WORTH IT. I am a DD and my bras are comfy, there’s no excuse.
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My bras are a perfect fit & I’m still delighted to get it off and let them both hang out!
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Yes the bra!!!
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Taking your shoes off at the end of a long day… even moreso if you’re wearing heels!
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Most of the things everyone has mentioned below… plus…
Doing a really big wee when you’ve been BUSTING – the relief!
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Walking though the door after a long day at work and seeing my boyfriend
Watching my little bothers run to the gate when I go to visit with massive smiles on their faces! So priceless!
And a shout out to Susan! You do a fantastic job of keeping me awake in your lectures even if its at the end of a long day!
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Little bothers! That’s cute
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Reading my fashion blogs
Walking to work in the mornings and afternoons
seeing my husband smile and laugh
DIY Beauty Treatments
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Oh, I need some new ones! Who do you follow?
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Right. You got me reading the 1000 Awesome Things blog and this so far has to be my favourite post of what I’ve read:
http://1000awesomethings.com/2011/10/31/124-babies-in-halloween-costumes/
And, expanding on that, taking pictures of babies and thinking about what it’d be like to show the really cute/embarrasing ones at said kid’s 21st
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Taking off your bra at the end of the day!!
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Haha so agree!
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Taking off your bra at the end of the day and then having some warm man hands rub you back after, oh I go weak at the knees!!!
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I have one of those moments right now- listening to my kids squealing & giggling as they play with the hose on a way too hot afternoon.
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Clean sheets and freshly shaved legs!!!
Oh and when you have a really itchy ear and you finally get a cotton bud in there and have a good scratch around!
And one more- finally dislodging that bit of meat from your teeth with some floss. Ahhhhhhh
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Walking out of work at the end of a looooong day
getting a facebook friend request from someone you haven’t thought bout in years
seeing the line in the square window
an amazing orgasam
looking in the mirror and feeling great about yourself
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- the smell of rain or fresh cut grass
- drawings from my nephews
- cuppa & a chat with my elderly Nanna
- ‘big squeeze’ cuddles & eskimo kisses from my nephews
- a good belly laugh with my Dad
- rainbows
- smelling the gardenias blooming in my front yard. Divine!
- curling up on the couch with a good book
- a hug from my husband after a long day (or any other time!)
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the smell of coffee in the morning
the way my toddler put his arms up and says “Huggies!!”
hearing my daughter have a giggle
waking up to my daughter soft kisses
watching the rain at night
watching the sunset from the window of our house
singing out loud in the car to my favorite songs
eating chocolate
the feeling I get after I go for jog or do a hard work out
fresh sheets
watching my dog sleeping
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