Do You Like This Story?

happy sad 380x344 Best and worst of the week

.

Happy Friday and welcome back to Best and Worst – your chance to get together with the rest of the Mamamia community and talk about the highs and the lows of your week, as well as anything else that’s on your mind.

Don’t forget – if you want a chance to host, email info@mamamia.com.au with your full name, headshot and a short bio (include any links to your blog/Twitter etc), and we’ll take it from there.

Introducing Laura. She writes:

Best: – A “magazine and wine” party with my two best friends (inspired by Bridesmaids, of course).
- Finally watching the season five premiere of Mad Men. Zou bisou bisou…
- Experiencing Mood Theatre’s performance of Sarah Kane’s play Psychosis 4.48 at Subiaco Arts Centre. Perth people: it is wonderful. (Disturbing, but wonderful.) Please buy tickets.
- Reading this Jimmy Little interview with Benjamin Law, a beautiful tribute to an incredible life: “You have to know yourself, trust yourself, and even love yourself to a point. Be yourself and keep trudging on down that path, because we’re all here in life for a reason.” – Jimmy Little

Worst: I was so disappointed to hear the news that Campbell Newman has axed the Queensland Premier’s Literary Awards. Whether he is fulfilling his economic mandate or rejecting the creative culture cultivated by his predecessors (maybe both), his decision implies that he and his government do not appreciate the value of celebrating and rewarding contemporary Australian literature.

I am not a Queenslander, nor a published author, so this does not affect me directly. Yet I feel compelled to speak out. Reading opens our eyes, minds and hearts. It invites both introspection and connectedness; making all of us – adults, teenagers and children alike – feel less alone, with a better understanding of the world around us. What’s more, literature preserves, for our future generations, our legacy: how we live our lives, the layers of our society, the issues we grapple with, our ways of seeing the world. We must cherish our writers – even those whose work we don’t particularly like – if only to ensure that, through them, our stories are woven into the tapestry of our culture and history, and that literature continues to enrich us, as individuals and as a society.

Of course, Australian writing will survive, with or without this award. But I think this decision is a step backwards.

Laura Curtis studies law, works as a makeup artist, tweets incessantly (@laura_valerie) and writes at her blogs One April Morning and Egg Cup (a book club). She is fond of bookstores, poems by Charles Bukowski, tea, Obama and pretty things (especially shoes and Ryan Gosling).

What was your best and worst of the week?

View more posts on:

Comments

Comment Guidelines : Imagine you’re at a dinner party. Different opinions are welcome but keep it respectful or the host will show you the door. We have zero tolerance for any abuse of our writers, our editorial team or other commenters. So if you’re rude, mean-spirited, snarky, aggressive, defamatory or bitchy, your comment will be deleted (so will any replies to the original comment – so don’t bother arguing with rude people, instead just hit the ‘alert moderator’ button).
And if you’re offensive, you’ll be blacklisted and all your comments will go directly to spam. Remember what Fonzie was like? Cool. That’s how we’re going to be – cool. Have fun and thanks for adding to the conversation…

Use your profile to comment: Or, comment as a guest:
(Max file size is 150kb & jpeg's only - if you need help resizing go here »)

128 Comments so far

  1. Me

    I would really appreciate others opinions on this..

    Do you think the kind of friends you have are a reflection of who you are?

    I am a single mother to three children with my two youngest (8&9) living with me. Their father is not in their lives and I have no family in Aussieland. I work full time and would love to have more hours in a day if only for the possibility of having some semblance of a personal life.

    I can say in all honesty that non of my friends ever offer to help with my kids. If I ask, it’s normally met with hesitation or strict timeframes. I need you to know that I only really ask every six weeks when I need to have my hair done and the last time was for an hour a day befor master 8′s birthday so that I can pick up his gift without him knowing. I always offer to have my friend’s kids and have them stay over much more often then my friends have them (with no time lines).
    But more than that, I often don’t get invited to things like bbq’s or dinner parties etc. After the article about Amanda who thought women don’t like her because she is pretty, I thought maybe my friends just don’t like me? But then I am told by them and others differently.. When I ask them why they don’t offer help or invite me over occassionaly as I can get quite lonely at times, they say that they just don’t think about it as I seem busy or really strong and don’t need help..

    So, are your friend a reflection of who you are?

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • SydGrl

      Without knowing you, your personality or your children it’s hard to advise.

      Sometimes though couples will exclude you if your single, it really sucks, for lack of a better word.

      Are your children well behaved? As, if not, then you won’t be getting offers of help or invites.

      I can tell you that I am very happy to babysit my friends children, I really enjoy doing it. I offer without being asked. But they are really really good, not a bother, they are a pleasure to spend time with.

      If your children are well behaved, then maybe it is your circle of friends

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  2. Haven Maven

    Best: Went to my first team meeting with the new work crowd in the city. 30 minute meeting, then drinks and food across the road at a lovely old pub. My kind of meeting!

    Worst: New bloke has a drinking problem. Universe, you are a complete *%^$$^# sometimes….

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  3. Anon for this

    My first best and worst, and unfortunately my worst is so embarrassing I am ashamed to put my name to it.
    BEST: Managed to exercise three times this week. I’m no slave to the gym – but I definitely notice the difference in my mood when I make the effort to work up a sweat!
    WORST: I caught head lice!!!! Yes, just like in that SJP movie. We found them in my teenage daughter’s hair (isn’t it supposed to be a primary school thing?), checked the whole family and it turns out that she wasn’t just sharing the love when she was snuggling on the couch with me watching TV. The absolute worst is that I have really long thick curly hair, and even though I have treated it and removed all the lice I don’t know how I am supposed to remove all the eggs! I need to get it cut short to make the job easier but I can’t go near a hairdresser. I want to cry.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • OssieLeo

      Dye your hair, it kills them. Also, if you treat your hair every 4 days with lice treatment, you will break the cycle. I have long curly hair and my boys always come home from school with lice..

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
      • Anon for this

        Thank you – I appreciate the advice.

        GD Star Rating
        loading...
  4. hedgehog

    A mixed bag this week, don’t know where to start and definitely need some advice..

    Best – spent most of the week with The Ex-husband, talking and reminiscing bout the good times, arguing bout the not-so-good times (hence the divorce!), hanging out and enjoying each others company, just like the good old days..getting a good night’s sleep and not waking up with my heart in pieces..

    Worst – the big elephant in the room ie the future of “us”..I want to get back together and so does he, it seems, although it would mean major sacrifices on my part to show that I am serious about making it work,such as quitting my job that I love, trying to have kids immmediately and getting married again, this time with a pre-nup (these are non-negotiable things on his part that he wants me to do) and I honestly feel like I need to do these things to prove that I am serious about us being together. However, I am scared that he has not/cannot forgive me for what happened in the past, we both got hurt and hurt each other majorly and I feel like nothing I do will be enough. He does not think he needs to change anything on his part, regardless of what I have said was his part in contributing to the divorce, yet due to my actions (in response to his!) he thinks I am solely to blame.. I have tried moving on and even seeing a psychologist to work through the guilt, hurt etc but I still love him and believe we have a future together. I know there is a lot of anger and hurt still, on both sides, and we no longer have the support of either of our families (due to it ending so messily) so we are on our own, and regardless of what happened, I do not want to lose him again..Can this work out or shall I just accept that it is over for good?? How do we move on and leave the past in the past?? Should I just keep trying and keep quiet if he gets angry and blames me ?? When is enough really enough??

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Another Jo

      Have you thought of couples counseling? That would be a good way for both of you to work through the issues and determine whether the relationship stands a chance.

      Without knowing exactly what happened, I would say that the fact that he says he thinks he doesn’t need to change anything on his part is a bit of a red flag. Especially since you said that there will be major sacrifices on your part.

      Good luck with it.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Louisec

      Sometimes loving each other, really is not enough. And you have to look at the situation really objectively, even coldly.

      Don’t let your heart manipulate you into a situation that wasn’t right then and by the sound of your post, isn’t right now. We can really really love someone but they can not be right for us.

      Our values can be different, what we want and expect from a relationship can be different.

      I’d be very careful especially when you say “He does not think he needs to change anything on his part”. That is like a red light to me. You need to step back and carefully consider this.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  5. MissKate

    Best: long weekend! Looking forward to having lunch with my cousin tomorrow. Cant wait to catch up with my old high school friends who have returned from living abroad.
    Very pleased with myself manage to clean all the pool area and do some gardening today.

    Worst: IVF is always at the back (and sometimes front) of my mind. Trying hard not to think or worry about it.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  6. Christine

    Best: Went to the Dandenong Ranges with family and family friends. Had heaps of fun and did some walking too!

    Worst: Still have a horrible cough (since last Friday!)! Pain!

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  7. Bookworm

    Worst: Sinus headaches, neck pain and constant tiredness.

    Best: I had my article about becoming a single mum published on Kiki and Tea. http://kikiandtea.com/2012/04/what-i-learnt-from-becoming-suddenly-single/
    I’ve gotten a lovely response, and has really cheered me up this week.

    OMM: Holidays! Looking forward to getting some me time when the kids go to their grandparents for a few days.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  8. Susan

    Worst-first Easter without my gorgeous mum. Best-continuing her tradition of requesting a song to her fav radio station in return for donation to royal children hospital appeal, so nice to hear the carole king tune mum liked played while doing a very mum thing, hanging out the washing!

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  9. Kris2040

    Best 1: It’s KDot’s Birthday! She’s been a bit off colour the last few days. I thought it was teething (she wouldn’t let me near her mouth with bonjela or panadol, and usually she opens up for the bonjela when her mouth’s sore. So I took her to daycare then got a phone call saying she’d been asleep for 3 hours, that wasn’t normal for her, so when she woke up I went and got her. Had a doc appointment anyway, so went to doc, we both had a virus. Good times. At least I could get some panadol into her yesterday, she’s much better (bar a cough) now. I got her a trike thingy for her birthday, and it was so nice today I put it together and we took it for a spin. Excellent!

    Best 2: First assignments handed in for each subject at uni. Feels good but I really want to know if I was on the right track or not – got the week off now, so tutors are marking over the break to get our stuff back to us.

    Worst: Frustration trying to hand in assignments – online sounds awesome, but in practice, not so much. At least we’ve done one now though, so know the drill for next time. I prefer paper and a real person.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • JamandCream

      I feel exactly the same way regarding turnitin. I much prefer the oldfashioned paper copy myself!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Anonymous

      Cute! Your little one is gorgeous! Happy birthday to her.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Susan As Well

      HaPpY BiRtHdaY KdOT :)

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • MissT

      Happy birthday KDot!! That trike thing looks awesome!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • roserusso

      Happy Birthday KDot!!

      :)

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  10. Elisha Narta

    Best: I have two Internships this year =) One that starts next week and the other which starts in June.

    Worst: I’m stuck in the friend zone. And I hate it =(

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  11. OssieLeo

    Worst, having 2 broken teeth that I can’t afford to fix, they hurt. An ear infection that I can’t shake and the fever triggers the migraines.. Phew
    Best, have all my 3 babies with me. Spent an amazing day and now sitting together watching tv.. Bliss
    Happy Easter and Passover (Pessach) to all x

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  12. Jessica

    Worst: I’m a little bit concerned about my long-term relationship. We’ve been dating about two and a half years and we’re still very loving towards each other and have a lot of fun but lately I’ve got the feeling that maybe he’s feeling it’s getting a bit stale? It could be paranoia, I’m not sure. I think it’s probably time to have a talk about where it is all going- we live together and have been talking about buying a house together but I’m not sure I want to make that commitment without getting engaged first. His parents had a very acrimonious divorce when he was very young and he’s a little marriage-shy but I’ve made it clear from the start that I don’t want to date for years and years without getting married. Not sure whether we’re just having a couple of off weeks or whether he’s subconciously or conciously distancing himself from me because we’ve been together a while now and both my siblings and a lot of our friends are getting married. Am starting to suspect I need to initiate a conversation about where things are going..

    Best: I don’t really have one. I don’t feel that good about myself at the moment.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Elisa

      That sucks that you’re not feeling good about yourself. I hope it changes ASAP. I was in a similar relationship once – communication is the key I reckon. I’d definitely talk with your partner, or get an opinion from a friend who can be impartial. I hope you feel better soon xx

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  13. Ella89

    Worst: back handed compliments- down at my parents beach house for pre-Easter celebrations and my grandma is here too. She’s lovely but were not all that close and keeps coming Out with zingers- watching good Friday appeall and an ad comes on with an overweight girl and she’s all “you look like her- you’ve got the same figure” ummm…thanks? Also telling me that I shouldn’t wear dresses that gather (aka my entire wardrobe) as they add weight and streamlined dresses will make me look slimmer like an aunt does when she wears them (who is as least 3 sizes bigger than me)

    Agh I know she’s not trying to be rude but fuck! I’m probably extra sensitive because I’m not happy with the way I look right now- I could (and will!!) definitely loose some weight but I really don’t think I’m some obese whale who needs to start wearing straight mumus!!!

    Best: heading home tomorrow for my best friends birthday :)

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Guest

      Don’t take any notice of her. She is probably getting “Old timers disease!”
      Sometimes older family members think they have the right to say whatever they want and they do not realise how hurtful their words can be. I am sure you are nowhere near the size of needing to wear ‘mumus’. I bet you are just right.
      Have a happy Easter and forget all about the silly old woman.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Jenna

      Oh I feel your pain. My dearly departed grandmother would come out with clangers too. When I got engaged she sweetly asked “and do you think you’ll be trying to lose some weight before the wedding?” I was a size 12-14 and being 178cm, that’s hardly round! of course, she would ask this will shaking a plate of brownies at me and telling me to have another one!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  14. eternally

    Best: made it to 8 months of breastfeeding, and get to eat lots of chocolate without putting on weight because of it!
    Worst: my gorgeous girl has two gorgeous teeth, but unfortunately has taken to biting while feeding, then laughing! I try saying no and taking her off, but unfortunately I can’t help sometimes saying “ow!” first, or worse, laughing at her laughing, which reinforces the behaviour.
    Any suggestions?
    I’m not very good at expressing, so I could do it so she still gets some breastmilk, but she would end up needing formula too.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • JosieY

      I would suggest calling the ABA, they deal with this kinda thing all the time!
      1800 686 268

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
      • eternally

        Yeah, that is a good idea, thanks. I just hate talking on the phone, especially to strangers!

        GD Star Rating
        loading...
        • Shan

          it sounds mean, but when mmy little one did it, I’d say a sharp ‘no’ and take him off. certainly not enough to frighten or traumatise him, but just to be clear and firm. worked reasonably quickly. someone else I know said she got such a shock from the pain that she gave her baby a swift smack! she said she felt terrible but that he never did it again!! (clearly I’m not advocating you smack your child!!)

          GD Star Rating
          loading...
        • Elisa

          I’ve rung the aba a couple times! They’re great! Didn’t feel like I was talking to a stranger at all! Ouch to the biting! Breastfeeding baby seven months now, thankfully no teeth :) xx

          GD Star Rating
          loading...
    • Em

      Yep ring the ABA. They even tolerated some crying (me) because had been bitten badly and was majorly sleep deprived and also can’t express and it hurt v. much. Also your maternal health nurse have a few tricks too. A loudish (not yelling obviously) ‘No! Just sucking no biting’. Though mine just smiled delightedly too. Have your index (clean) finger ready to pop in and detach bubs when they getting fidgety and likely to bite. Their website is good too. Currently eating choc and made it to 8 months feeding too :) )

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  15. hms

    Worst: spent a few days with my Mum who is unwell. Unfortunately she won’t help herself which is really frustrating to those around her. Her partner has the patience of a saint!

    Best: coming home to my home. Is lovely just to be here!

    OMM: the changing nature of friendships. It’s hard to say goodbye when you no longer have anything at all in common.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • LittleMissSunshine

      Hms, sorry that your mum is not well. I can relate to that (my Mum doesn’t seem to want to help herself either) but also your comment on saying goodbye to friends when there really isn’t that much in common left. Do share your tips if you have any :) .

      Have a lovely Easter break.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  16. secretly scared....

    Best…I really love my job, and I’ve made a really awesome friend there which is great.
    Worst: have had some issues with my period since I was young. Just had yet another ultrasound and they found a growth.
    It is more than likely benign, but still really worrying. Sigh.
    Omm: still in love with my ex. That’s just annoying!

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  17. Judie

    Worst: Husband had a heart attack yesterday afternoon.

    Best: He was not far from the hospital when he started feeling ill, so he got treated quickly. It looks like it was a mild one.

    Worst: Having no petrol and no money for petrol to get to the hospital.
    Best: Friend took us there and gave me petrol and food money.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Mia

      Oh Judie….is he ok???

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Chellebelle

      What a lovely friend. I hope your husband is ok.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  18. Mel b

    Best: Easter eggs, can’t get enough!! AND our holiday!! Leave Tuesday to see our beautiful families!!
    Bad: Easter eggs, oh my I buy them for the kids then I EAT them bad mum, bad mum!! :p

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  19. Chellebelle

    Best: I posted in the Open Post about my stressful work meeting yesterday. Well, I did it. Our project is secure and jobs will be kept. I’m very relieved and proud. Also best, am at the coast right now and it’s beautiful.

    Worst: am a bit sick – some kind of throat thing.

    OMM: how pleased I am to have rediscovered my music mojo. I’m enjoying band practice again instead of seeing it as a chore, and have been asked to play in the orchestra for a local production of Iolanthe. I think I’m going to do it. I haven’t done a musical since I played in The Wall 2 or 3 years ago. It’s hard to combine with work and 2 little kids, but it does wonders for my playing and it’s fun to be part of something creative.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Rach

      As a fellow muso…embrace your music mojo!

      I love to hear about others who enjoy community music making!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  20. A

    Best- holidays and the eggfest that’s about to commence.
    Worst- not too much of a worst and admittedly hilarious in hindsight. I nanny part time and yesterday I had my little mate (3) come with me on a day I don’t usually look after him so I had to take him with me to get my car serviced. Anyway I was carrying a lunch box and a man made a remark along the lines of ‘what healthy food mummy has in there for you!’ And I couldn’t be bothered correcting him. THEN we heard music. Some word icecream truck type van pulled up selling sandwiches. Of course little mate wanted a sandwich even though he wouldn’t of eaten any of them. Tears ensued and then the screams ‘you’re not my mummy, where’s my mummy’. The looks I got were somewhere between ‘control your child’ and ‘is she a kidnapper?’ Good times…

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  21. Kaybee

    Worst: I had to think pretty hard about that one this week… and then I remembered that on Wednesday it was 3 years since a friend lost his 15 year old son in a tragic road accident. Never does a trip go by without me looking for his memorian tree. And being Easter time, I come to think of the unfortunate accidents which come at this time of year. I hope everyone stays safe on our roads, life is too precious.

    Best:
    It is easter, which means a few days off, giving a good chance to see family and friends.
    Work is still going well. and for that I am so so grateful. to have been out of the work force for nearly 4 years due to illness and then to find yourself in the right place is incredibly encouraging.
    Happy Weekend everyone :)

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  22. Rach

    Best: Signed a lease at a new apartment for next semester – and the complex is called the Opera House! Funny because we’re musos, and funny because we are Aussies abroad! The complex is almost on campus, almost walking distance but definitely short bus ride in.
    Worst: Up and Down like a yoyo regarding our future plans. If I don’t have time to think during the day, I am usually okay, unless it means I think at night instead and then can’t sleep. I just want to stick to the original plan, and I don’t want to deal with what-ifs. I also just kind of want to run a ‘normal’ life (please don’t shoot me for that, I just mean married with kids and a picket fence, etc).
    OMM: Does anyone know of a good website for good (authentic) Asian food? Especially Thai, Korean, Chinese, etc. I am totally sick of American food and trying to make what I know with their stuff (butter is made with sweetened cream here – try making decent savoury pastry with that!), but we have fantastic Asian import stores here, and we both love the cuisine and it’s healthy, so love some ideas!

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Tea

      Have you tried http://steamykitchen.com/? Not everything is particularly authentic but I’ve always had success with her recipes and she’s based in the States so you should be able to get the ingredients. Good luck!!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
      • Rach

        Thanks, Tea, will definitely have a good look this weekend!

        GD Star Rating
        loading...
    • Kris2040

      Taste.com.au is pretty good. Even if it’s not authentic, it should give you some ideas.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
      • Rach

        Kris, I love Taste.com.au as well! I’ve got some damn good curry recipes off there in the past… :)

        GD Star Rating
        loading...
  23. Ecidnac

    Best: am now 33 weeks pregnant and I had my last day at work yesterday. Can focus on fixing my wonky pelvis and looking after my two kids and all their activities.

    Worst: a stomach/vomiting bug is now going through our family. :-(

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  24. Mamma

    Best: driving down to Victoria to stay with my parents. Love chilling out by the Lakes and watching Mum spend time with our daughter. She is an amazing Grandma & miss 2 loves her to bits!!

    Worst: long & hectic week at work, followed by 9 hour drive last night. Topped off by miss 2 projectile vomit as hubby weaves like Fangio through the mountains. (1st work problems)

    OMM: mums BFF lost her hubby in a car accident a few weeks ago. He was drink driving, so tragic and unnecessary. I feel so sad for her, she is the sweetest person and has had a terrible year like no one deserves. It makes my worst so trivial but my best so meaningful.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  25. Susan As Well

    So, the dating saga continues! Have hit a few bumps in the road with date no.2 though. I’ve had to cancel a couple of times due to illness, unexpected work stuff, etc. However, the nice side of it is texting and talking on the phone with him. He comes across as a very steady person and is easy to be with … hmmmm … will keep you posted :)

    Happy easter to all you beautiful and funny MM’ers xo

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Zelicat

      Oh enjoy your Easter too Susan as well. Love the idea of talking and texting with date no 2. Fingers crossed for you!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • eternally

      Well at least you can’t help but take it slow!
      My (now) husband and I had 3 dates in the first 4 months, due to FIFO work etc. lots of talking, texting and even old-fashioned letters though, quite romantic!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  26. Bextraordinary

    Good morning ladies ;) )

    Worst: have just begun a new job, and left the first day in tears :( the previous manager in my job was walked out 2 weeks ago, and the place is a mess and no one done any of the work!! Feel like I’m drowning in paperwork!!

    Bests: 4 whole days with my friends and family!!! Leaves time for everyone and ME! Bbqs, poker night, beach day and arts and crafts event with my daughter! Not to mention the egg hunts!!
    Another best: have done 2 days in new job and aside from being a bit overwhelmed, I love it and can see how much More streamlined I can do it!! AND I don’t have to deal with customers!!!! Yeeehaaaa!

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  27. Sarah

    Laura I know some people in Psychosis- and the director! We Probably know some of the same people! Small world :) congrats on hosting best & worst!

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  28. Simone

    Best: lots of exciting things are about to happen, holiday, moving, birthdays!

    OMM: I moved away from my two best friends at the start of the year and it feels like neither of them are putting any effort into our friendship. I get replies to my messages 1, 2 or 3 days later. They’ve ignored some really big and exciting things that have happened in my life (travelling plans), they’ve been unsupportive of other big things (moving in with my boyfriend). When I do ask them how things are going etc I get generic answers like “good, work is good” And I just don’t understand it! Is it just as simple as they don’t want to be my friend anymore?! (I know how juvenile that sounds!) I’m trying to look at my own behaviour and how I act towards them but I feel like I’m always trying. I wish I could go into more detail but I’m always paranoid about giving away too much on who I am! Is this something I should bring up? Should I just accept they “are just not that into me”. I suppose my only hesitation in accepting that is that before I moved we had the sort of friendship where we told each other everything in great detail and did everything together and it was always a lot of fun?!

    Has anyone else experienced similar problems with long distance friendships? Struggling to maintain them? And feeling like you’re the only one trying?

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Ally

      Hey Simone,

      Long distance friendships are hard to maintain. I’m the one that has moved away this time (for a temporary period of time) and it takes constant work to keep them up. It’s not the first time I’ve been away but I think this is the first time I feel like I have actually maintained friendships well (thank God for Skype, facebook, email and texting – and learning from past mistakes!)

      When you move away, you’re off having all of these new and exciting experiences; meeting new people and making new plans. It’s hard for your friends back home to relate to that when they are unable to share in it the same way they would if you were all living in the same place. I think it’s also a little bit of a case of ‘out of sight, out of mind.’

      I think it’s also important to remember that friendships change. Sometimes it happens naturally, sometimes a life change triggers it. It’s taken me ages to realise that that’s actually ok. People come in to your life and out of it – all for a reason.

      I’m sure your friends do still care about you. Keep sending the texts, make time to call, and, maybe, tell them how you feel :) They can’t change their behaviour if they don’t know how it’s affecting you. It doesn’t have to be a big deal – maybe tell them you’d like to organise a time once a week/fortnight/month to have a girly skype catch up?

      Not sure if any of that helps! My final advice, at the end of the day, friendships are two way, you may get to a point where you realise it’s just not worth it anymore and have to let go, and as hard as that may be, it may be the best thing for you!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
      • Simone

        Ally thank you so much for taking the time to respond! I really like what you’ve said and agree with a lot of it! One hard part is that I haven’t moved anywhere exciting it’s been a work move and to a really small town so I was really struggling at first and didn’t have much of a life! I think that has probably amplified the loneliness. So like you said they may not know how I’m feeling or what they’re doing because I probably am feeling a little extra sensitive thanks to struggling with the move at first!
        I’m very happy for you being able to maintain your friendships long distance! We do live in the best age for it! Sometimes it can feel like you aren’t even away you know so much about people’s friendships!
        Thanks again Ally!

        GD Star Rating
        loading...
        • Xanthe

          Ally has written the reply I was about to type! Almost word-for-word.
          The bottom line, Simone, is that sometimes you just have to let go, it’s TIME to let go. You’re not being unfaithful to them – nor they to you. It’s just called Life.
          When I moved three states away, 4 years ago, I was determined not to lose contact with all my friends in my former city. We all swore undying friendship and never to let the bonds loosen.
          But it happened.
          When you’re not on the spot and can’t participate in what’s going on in everyone’s lives, it’s kinda hard for them to e-mail about “trivial” things in their lives, or what they see as trivial and just part of their “ordinary” daily lives – whereas here you are, in a fantastic new place, having brilliant adventures and a New Life.
          I think they feel they can’t match all that, in their news.
          I now have ONE friend with whom I’m in sporadic contact. The rest I have let go, gently and lovingly.
          I wish you joy and heaps of new friends in your new life!

          GD Star Rating
          loading...
          • Simone

            Thank you Xanthe! That really put a smile on my face!! Lovingly letting go might be on the horizon I think! Sad but it looks that way! I need to be fully present in this new life and enjoy every bit of it! So true that it’s the trivial things that don’t get shared and that’s what you want to know! The little bits never seem worth mentioning when you only get to talk once a week ish but they are so important! Thanks for your kind words xox

            GD Star Rating
            loading...
  29. Melissa

    Worst: Having huge problems with my new housemate who only moved in about a month ago. Already had one big blow up (she got aggressive but I really tried hard to stay calm). Don’t feel comfortable at home anymore and hate this anxious feeling because I just can’t relax. I’m trying to make a time to talk to her but she is avoiding me and I haven’t seen her for nearly a week. Just hate tension and conflict :-(

    Best: Planning a girly day with my mum, cousin and grandmother tomorrow. Off to see a theatre performance and have lunch together. Will be really nice to bond with these beautiful ladies.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Elise

      I’m sorry you have an unhappy home situation :( I understand how you feel, I once lived with a girl who was a control freak and quite a bitch. She frequently stated on facebook that she hated her flatmates or she sent us emails with a list of her grievances (while ignoring us at home). I’m not suggesting you do the same but maybe if your flatmate is avoiding you, you could leave her a wee note to explain how you are feeling?

      Enjoy your girly day out!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Louisec

      You need to sit down with her and talk it thru. Don’t put it off because until you do this, you don’t really know what she’s thinking.

      And better to be rid of her now then in a few months when things are really really bad.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Alice

      Oh Melissa, that sucks. I know it sounds harsh, but could you ask her to move out? It obviously isn’t working for either of you, and you need your home to be your santurary!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  30. melinka

    Love the matchstick pic, very cute :)
    Also love having a day off so I actually have time to read MM AND comment!!
    Best: Having some time off this weekend and OH has been super supportive lately, very giving with the cuddles. Love him so much.
    Worst: As usual, my job. It just doesn’t get better. Now working 12-14 days is the norm, as well as popping in for a few hours on the weekend. But I still don’t seem to get anywhere and I honestly wouldn’t mind the hours as much if I was making actual progress with the research. Is making me physically sick :(
    Don’t want to give up, don’t know how to do anything else, but thank god I have a few days off or … or … crap I don’t know what I’d do!! Argh!

    Chocolate makes everything better. Happy Easter everyone :)

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  31. JamandCream

    Best: Survived my first half semester of Uni with two HD’s, going home for Midsemester break and Easter chocolate.
    Worst: Weight associated with said Easter chocolate.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  32. Anoon

    Best: 4 day weekend!

    Worst: I was given the responsibility of getting a child from my daughters kindy class after school and walking this other child to the class room next door (about 10 metres) as the mum asked me to do this, and somebody else was taking her child home (her neighbour). I completely forgot and just got my child and went home and then remembered this other kid. Luckily the other mum, the neighbour, who was taking this child home just went to my daughters class and got the child as she couldnt find me – feel so terrible about it. I straight away rang the other mum who was taking home this child and she said she had him and all was fine. I sms the mum to tell her what happened and how sorry I was – still feeling terrible about forgetting this child who is a real sweetheart.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  33. Christy

    Best: My littlest dude turned one on Tuesday, we had a family bbq and lots of choc for his party and he’s awfully cute.

    About to finish working shift work after 9 years of it, and am starting a 9-5 job on Wednesday! Very excited for an office style nursing job.

    Worst: Husband still not working after 2 months (he’s driving me nuts at home), and even though he applies for 5-10 jobs a day, no one replies. Why don’t they acknowledge that he’s applied.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Faybian

      I left shift work after about a decade too and haven’t looked back. The convenience of office hours makes up for the drop in pay.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  34. jessc

    Best: I have three whole days off – plan to start a new book, catch up on uni work (about to make a list of what I need to achieve this weekend), sleep in, watch footy, exercise a bit. Going to the footy last night was awesome, watched my team (Carlton) thrash Brisbane!

    Worst: Easter happened to fall on my RDO/long weekend week of the month anyway. So I get two days in lieu owing to me (and another for ANZAC day because it falls on my Wednesday off) but who knows when I will get to take them. My boss only really cares about her days owing, and she’s going on holidays after next week so I’m running the department for two weeks and won’t be able to take days off. The days are meant to be taken within a month. Somehow I don’t see that happening.

    I’ll also be running the department with just a dollar an hour extra pay (before tax), the duty manager constantly nagging me (she does it to everyone), and all the added responsibility. After my three week stint in November I was over.it.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  35. K8e.

    Best: Lovely dinner with two of my close friends and my wonderful hubby last weekend.Lots of working from home days and days off lately and coming up… nice to be able to rest up. Honeymoon upcoming and looking forward to that!

    Worst:Saving saving saving for the honeymoon and pre-baby renos and other important things, doing my head in… kind of sick of living down to the last 5c each fortnight (no joke… part of the reason i didn’t physically GO to work on monday was because i couldn’t afford parking :( how sad is that!)… and just feeling quite down a fair amount of the time lately… don’t know if it’s just the stress or the baby hormones but BLAH… i’m so ready to go O/S and just RELAX and reconnect with my lovely.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  36. T

    Worst: my 8yr old son broke his arm on Tuesday, had surgrey on Wednesday. Now is plaster up to his armpit on his rightarm (dominate hand) for at least 8 weeks. Try keeping a 8yr old boy with ADD and a broken arm still. I also have two papers due last week and I have only just started.

    Best: Master 8 waking up in recovery stating he was fine and asking if I was o.k?
    My wonderful boss not making me apply for leave for time off for my son’s injury. My amazing husband who for the 1st time in his life is taking leave to look after our son for the next week, so I can concerntrate on my studies and work until school holidays start next Friday.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  37. Claudia

    Best: splashing at the beach with my boys on probably the last warm day of the season
    new Bones episode after a very long wait.

    Worst: feeling like a new friend is distancing herself…and not knowing why. Am pretty sad about this as we really clicked :(

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  38. lynnie

    Best – hit the 32 wks mark with my 2nd child. So grateful for all that I have :)

    Worst – the increasing back pain and frequency of needing to pee is annoying!

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  39. Secret this week.

    Worst # 1: I had gastro for a week. I crapped my pants four times. I am living in the country for uni and had no one to look after me, could not see a doctor, and the Dr in casualty (which was not busy) was a patronising little hobbit who I do not think sent my samples to pathology.

    Worst #2: On account of being so sick, I have not been able to even start the two law assignments that I have due on Tuesday and Wednesday.

    Best #1: I flew home to Sydney yesterday and was able to go straight to the doctor who gave me strong antibiotics and have cleared up my incontinence, STAT. She said that there was no way that what I had was viral. I love how things get done around here.

    Best #2: Seeing my gorgeous mama and brother. She is currently making me bacon and eggs, and he just bought a giant, artisan easter egg from a cake shop for us all to share on Sunday. Yum X 2.

    Best #3: I have been steadily losing weight after having a gastric balloon inserted in December 2011. The size 12 (US) dress that I ordered from J Crew came, and IT FITS!!!!! Not being all Samantha Brick about it, but I think I look a little bit pretty in it.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  40. no sweat

    best: I feel like long standing issues with someone have been resolved. We can both move ahead putting the past behind us, and in a way that is beneficial to both of us. win/win

    worst: questioning continuing employment or going back to school. I don’t know what to do! I want the universe to tell me!
    (isn’t it strange that I don’t want to write “God” in case I offend others? on that note – Happy Easter!)

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Xanthe

      Hello No Sweat.
      Out here we in the cosmos are really busy, but always have time to help.
      So this is what you do:
      Take your hands off your keyboard. (Right NOW!)
      Close your eyes.
      Focus on your solar plexus. (You do know where that is, don’t you?)
      Now ask the question of us: “School?” (pause) “Employment?”
      Whichever of those gives you a jolt in your solar plexus is the answer.
      Easy, see?
      Now don’t, when you get the message (jolt) say, “Oh, but I’m not sure that’s what I REALLY want to do….”
      You ask. You get.
      Accept – or not.
      We all have free choice
      Blessed be!

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  41. Georgie

    Worst: I’m really stressed at the moment. I’m wondering whether I made the right decision when I moved to Canberra to study a postgraduate law degree. The study is just so hard and I feel like everyone understands but me. I’ve never quit anything before but am contemplating it now. Trying to start/finish a contracts essay and literally have no idea what I’m doing. FWP I know.

    Best: Home for Easter.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • melinka

      Oh Georgie, feeling overwhelmed by work is not fun :(
      Is there any chance you could start a study group with some of the other students? Would be a good way to make some friends and you might get some insight into the trickier bits of the course.

      Good luck, hope it improves :)

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Natski

      Georgie, try not to worry too much. I am also doing postgraduate law degree as well (NSW) and found contracts to be a tricky bugger. It is often placed at the beginning of your degree when you haven’t quite switched your legal ‘brain’ and that only compounds the problem.

      My tip would be to read those crappy ‘nutshell’ books to get a vague idea of the concepts and then read the full text of the key cases. I know that it takes forever, but there is no substitute for sitting down and reading the whole case from start to finish to see the reasoning behind the judgment. The other thing that I would like to say is that sometimes you need to read things through a few times for it to sink in. Reading deeply is a learned skill and you will find that the farther along you are in your degree, the easier it will be to read forensically and pluck out the material facts and conclusions.

      Finally, there will always be subjects that you find more difficult than others. I am trying to write my evidence assignment and I am struggling. I usually do fairly well with minimal work but I just can’t wrap my head around the hearsay rule. Just remember, “P’s” make degrees! Good luck. x

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
      • Georgie

        Really really helpful comments, thank you both so much. I just feel like I’m drowning but hopefully I’ll be ok. I like the idea of my law brain ‘switching on’! xx

        GD Star Rating
        loading...
  42. Sdot

    Worst – second miscarriage in four months. One the day before Christmas, one the day before Easter (what is it with me and holidays!?). Sick of this emotional rollercoaster. My heart is aching. Three angels in heaven now :(
    Best – best, most kind, loving and supportive husband, friends and family in the world.
    Best of the best – my two gorgeous kids. Even more of a miracle today than ever before xx

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  43. ingy

    Best: Easter treats. Hot cross buns, Easter eggs and lollies – I have it all. I am working over Easter so treats make the time go a little bit faster http://bit.ly/HcDJo7

    Worst: Nothing that can’t be cured by chocolate:)

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  44. Bel

    Just looked at your book review site Egg-cup. Love it. Will be back. Thanks

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  45. Anon this time

    Worst: Feeling a bit defeated. I reported a sexual assault to the police a while back. They’ve spoken to people and gone through with stuff, but they’ve just told me that they think it’s probably not in my best interests to go ahead, as it’ll be too hard to secure a conviction without enough evidence. It’s a huge bummer, because there is one guy who knows what happened, and could give reliable evidence, but won’t say anything, as he has conflicting interests with the guy who did this to me.
    I know it is often the case with stories like mine, but wow, it sucks. Feeling a bit stupid for even going through with telling the police, cos that was HARD.

    Ah, I’m sorry for the whiney whine whine, I really don’t do this often, but I don’t have anyone else really to say, it to and my next appointment with my counsellor isn’t for a week. Just, argh. Feeling a bit broken down.

    Best: Luckily, I do have a best! Spending time with my Mum last night, doing some handy-man work. It took a few hours, and it was very difficult, but it was a great bonding exercise. I’m grateful to have her.
    Hugs to everyone :D xox

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • K8e.

      This totally sucks, i hope you remove the guy who knows but won’t say anything from your ‘friend’ list, and soon – that isn’t right :(

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • DustyRose

      I agree, that absolutely sucks. I don’t think you’re silly for reporting it, at least you tried. Good luck with working things out

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Concerned anon

      I am so sorry that you went through that- I know it was incrediably brave and hard for you to do that. I am a bit shocked the police told you that, it’s not really their job to make that decision.
      When it comes down to it most sexual assaults are word on word evidence, and if you are a credible witness then that should be enough for it to at least go to committal ( before a judge to decide if there is a strong enough case to proceed to trial) .
      I don’t know any of the details of your case, but I would encourage you to contact the witness assistants at your states DPP and see if you can’t get some more information, or a detailed explanation as to why they are not proceeding. You are at the very least entitled to this under the victims of crimes legislation. If it hasn’t even been refered to the DPP then someone hasn’t done their job.
      Also, try contacting brave hearts or your local rape crisis centre they have very good working relationships with police units who specialize in these kinds of offences and maybe able to relook at what evidence is available.
      General duties police do a very good job, in really difficult situations, but my experience is that they don’t always have detailed knowledge of legislation
      and evidence acts as the specialist sexual assault teams.
      Thinking of you xo

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • lauravalerie

      That is awful, Anon, I’m so sorry. You have done such a brave thing by reporting it to police. Wishing you all the best. xx

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Louisec

      THat’s really terrible for you. Do you have much support? Please do not feel “silly”, reporting him was the absolute right thing to do and it was brave of you.

      Also do not listen to the police. Get more advice. Seek your own legal councel if you are able to.

      ARe you in Sydney? I can recommend someone if so.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  46. Rhianna

    Best: My wonderful husband and I are heading off to Qld on Sunday (in tow with my MIL, sis-in-law and grandmother-in-law) in order to see my BIL, sis-in-law and our niece and nephew. This’ll be our last trip before our own lil princess arrives in August! Can’t wait!
    Worst: I’ve been SO sick! Not morning sickness (I didn’t actually get any! *ducking to avoid things being thrown*), but a mega-flu. Of course, I couldn’t take time out of work because we had performances coming up I had to be there for! It’s taken 3 dr’s visits and 5 weeks to get to feeling about 65%… Thank goodness it’s now school hols!
    OMM: I just want to send lots of love out to everyone who’s sad, upset or just needs a hug! It seems the world in general seems just a lil bit upset at the moment… So, I’m sending big hugs (luckily virtual and non-infectious!) to all the MMers and your job is to pass them on! :)

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • melinka

      Aren’t you lovely! :)
      Big hug right back at ya, hope you have a wonderful Easter :)

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
  47. Flowers in the spring

    Best: it’s a four day work week, followed by a four day weekend, followed by a four day work week, followed by two weeks of holidays. What’s not to love?

    Worst: the emotional toll of my job sometimes consumes me. Working with young adults with mental health problems, dysfunctional families and parents who don’t parent; sometimes it feels like it all hits at once and it grinds you down. I used to love my job, now I’m not so sure…

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  48. Ozlicious

    Worst – my fiance and I had our cars stolen! Woe! Thieves broke into our home, found our car keys, and stole them right out of our garage!

    Best – my car was found relatively undamaged! My partner wasn’t so lucky…

    Laura, as a Queenslander, I do understand where you’re coming from, but I happen to believe that State governments need to place service delivery above less practical priorities. Of course it’s great for reading to be encouraged and for great literature to be acknowledged; but I have firsthand knowledge and understanding of how the Bligh government has failed nurses, teachers, and of course Queenslanders. I personally know a nurse who wasn’t paid as a result of the payroll bungle in QLD Health. There’s a reason that Queenslanders spoke so emphatically and delivered such a mandate to Campbell Newman. We are so sick of our disfunctional government departments. It was ridiculous. It was time for change. And once service delivery is back to a standard befitting a first-world economy…then we can bring back luxuries such as book awards.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
  49. Dkmum

    I haven’t posted on this segment in a while, but having just had another hour’s sleep I’m feeling in the mood. You see my best and worst are tied together.
    Worst: having had to take the bars off my tiddler’s bed as she otherwise crawls out of her cot. I thought I’d go with the safe option, but it has meant getting up at 5.30 every morning for the past couple of weeks, whereas we usually got to sleep in til 7-7.30. And being just past my first trimester of my second pregnancy it’s been a chock to the system that is catching up with me.

    Best: I’ve been tying her bedroom door shut at night as that was the only way she’d stay in bed. Last night I didn’t untie the door, and fortunately so as I heard the little miss get up at 3am!! Realising the door was ‘locked’ however, she went straight back to bed. And didn’t get up til 6.30 this morning. Score!!
    Needless to say, there are two very tired females in this household these days.

    Other worst: This good Friday with no family around. My husband is away at work, his family is away on the boat, and all my friends are doing family things. I always miss my own family on days like this, but they’re all the way in Europe.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • becauseimthemum

      There are door knob covers you can buy from Target. They come in a pack of 3 and cover the door knob so that little toddler hands can’t open the door. If you need to keep your daughter in her room at nighttime these are great, if you have doorknobs. I have one on Miss9′s door to keep Mr3 out of her room. If you have door handles I guess tying the door shut is the only option :)

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
      • Dk mum

        Yeah, door handles here, because we were just stylish and shortsighted like that when we renovated 3 years ago ;) tying the door shut is not ideal but it works for now and hopefully she’ll get the idea soon enough.
        Thanks for the advice!!

        GD Star Rating
        loading...
        • oddsocks

          We have door handles too so we bought a child safety gate for the bedroom door. Our son could see through it so it wasn’t scary (being locked in a room would have freaked him out) but he couldn’t open it. Was a great signal to him that it was time for sleeping and a great relief to us knowing he wasn’t getting up to mischief during the night. He is 3 now and the gate is long gone :)

          GD Star Rating
          loading...
    • ingy

      I’m the same, my family is overseas and my boyfriend is doing a pub crawl tonight. I don’t mind though because I am at work now and then tonight I will relax with a glass of wine and a good book. I haven’t even asked friends what they are doing today because I feel like some me-time.

      I will be calling my family and say hi tonight, it always makes me smile. We are so lucky that technology allows us to call them when we want to:) I hope your day improves X

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
      • Dk mum

        We should catch up!!
        As it turns out the zoo and aquatic centre are both open, so we’ll get out the house and do our thing.
        My day always improves when strangers are looking out for me ;)

        GD Star Rating
        loading...
  50. Loulee

    Worst: My beautiful mum passed away 12 days ago.
    Worst: My dad is crazy but now is crazy with grief and we are left to look after him.
    Worst: He thinks it’s all about him.
    Worst: I miss my mum and want to hug her.
    Best: I loved my mum so much and she was a great friend, our greatest cheerleader, a woman ahead of her times… I feel her calm and soothing presence with me all the time.

    GD Star Rating
    loading...
    • Martini Mac

      I am very sorry for your loss xo

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Rhianna

      So sorry to hear… I know there’s nothing anyone can say to magically make it all go away but please know there are MM friends out there who are thinking of and praying for you… xxx

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Elise

      So sorry for your loss. Hang in there xx

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • ingy

      I am so sorry for your loss Loulee, I will be thinking of you over this difficult time and I will be lighting a candle for your mum tonight. Grief never goes away but the good memories make it a little bit better. We are lucky to have spent time with our special ones although they are always taken away too soon. X

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • K8e.

      My thoughts are with you and your loved ones in this hard time :(

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Katherine

      I’m so sorry that you’ve lost your mum. What a dreadful loss. I’m glad you feel her presence with you and it gives you comfort. xx

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • melinka

      Words don’t seem enough, but am so sorry for your loss. Cherish her memory and hold onto tight to your friends. Best wishes.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • georgiepie

      I’m so sorry, thinking of you xxx

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Susan As Well

      Be kind to yourself Loulee.
      My its-all-about-me mother went totally crazy when my dad passed. It settled back to normal (for her) after about eight months to being all-about-her most of the time.
      Thinking of you xo

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • Loulee

      Wow thanks everyone for all your kind words. So lovely. My mum and I read The Help over Christmas and we were going to watch the movie together but we never got the chance. So my daughter and I have just watched it together. Had a little weep.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...
    • JosieY

      I am so sorry for your loss. May God send you and your family strength and courage for the hard days ahead.

      GD Star Rating
      loading...

So, we have $1000 to give away... oh, would you be interested? Well step right this way.

To go in the draw to win, just LIKE us on Facebook, enter your email address and tell us in 25 words or less why you love reading Mamamia.

Close this popup



Full Terms & Conditions