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The true-crime epic about the seagulls on the Frankston train? Some dude made it up.

 

It’s one of those stories that captures a nation. A frenzied tale full of feathers, deep-fried potato and the inimitable Frankston line.

Hailed by some (the guy who wrote it) as the “true-crime story of the decade“, the story of the bloke who fed his chippies to a ravenous pack of gulls and set them (the birds, that is) on a carriage full of commuters has inarguably captured the national conciousness.

While most savvy citizens agreed it probably never happened, I think we were all secretly hoping that Chris Harrigan’s Facebook epic contained at least a teenie crumb of truth.

In case you missed, it went like this:

Sadly, as it turns out, the tale is less defining Australian mythology, so much as a pretty standard joke the late Australian comedian Maurie Fields told on “Hey Hey It’s Saturday”. In 1989.

A Twitter user broke the news on Tuesday arvo:

Sigh. Maurie Fields’ son has since confirmed with Mashable:

“Yep, he did. Circa 1989,” Fields Jr. replied when asked if his father had previously told the joke.

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“Slightly different form but effectively the same joke.”

Apparently it used to end, “… and the train took off with the birds inside. Then the bloke pulled out another pack of fish ‘n chips and started eating,” Field said.

“[Maurie] said, ‘Lucky they were only after my wife’s dinner’.”

As for Harrigan, he’s sticking to his guns, apparently. The “friend of a friend” who told him the tale is the enigmatic “Sam from Melbourne” who incidentally called into Triple J earlier this week.

Sam gave his version of events to the station’s drive show hosts Veronica and Lewis, claiming it happened in 2007.

“This is actually a very old story, which is why I’ve called up… Hence why Metro probably wouldn’t be aware of it,” he said.

“It happened about 2007, back in my uni days. It’s pretty much as it’s been reported on social media. Obviously we didn’t have smartphones or anything back then, but I do have a friend who can corroborate as well, who was there, but unfortunately he’s in South America doing god-knows-what.”

Yeah, pull the other one mate.

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