real life

Bloke gives his wife a spreadsheet of all the times she denied him sex.

Spreadsheets are useful for a lot of things. Accounting, schedules… uh… more accounting.

But this husband got a bit creative with his Microsoft Excel, in the most asshole-y kind of way. A lady, who is only known as ‘throwwwwaway29’ shared a little story with the Internet about her husband:

Yesterday morning, while in a taxi on the way to the airport, Husband sends a message to my work email which is connected to my phone. He’s never done this, we always communicate in person or by text. I open it up, and it’s a sarcastic diatribe basically saying he won’t miss me for the 10 days I’m gone.

Attached is a SPREADSHEET of all the times he has tried to initiate sex since June 1st, with a column for my “excuses”, using verbatim quotes of why I didn’t feel like having sex at that very moment. According to his ‘document’, we’ve only had sex 3 times in the last 7 weeks, out of 27 “attempts” on his part.

Here is that spreadsheet:


We have a little something we’d like to remind throwwwwaway29’s charming husband.

 

 

Your wife does not need to have an excuse. YOUR WIFE DOES NOT OWE YOU SEX. If you are both in the mood for sex, have it. If one of you is not, then don’t. If this is happening too often, then talk about. Do NOT make a f*cking a spreadsheet, you twat.

And stop interrupting her damn TV show. It was probably something really good like America’s Next Top Model or NCIS…

Lady, we recommend you throwwwwaway your husband. Find one who uses spreadsheets for accounting, schedules, and all the nice things HE has done for YOU. Cue Aretha Franklin: R-E-S-P-E-C-T…

 

Tags: