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PatrickOffspring1 So you want to marry Patrick from Offspring?

Actor Matthew Le Nevez who plays Patrick on Offspring

 

 

 

 

by NATALIA JASTRZAB

As I write this, there are women all over Australia whose hearts are palpitating as they remember this week’s season finale of Offspring.

Am I right? Own up. Come on. How many of you are sitting at your desk or standing in the kitchen and fantasizing about your happily married future life with Patrick, RIGHT NOW?

Sure he’s a fictional character but I do not judge any of you. Why?

Because I too, fell deeply and madly in love this year.

I was in a cinema watching The Lucky One, starring Zac Efron. Incidentally, I was sitting next to my (very patient) partner, although it wasn’t him I fell in love with on that rainy afternoon.

It was Logan, Zac Efron’s perfect character.

Logan was gorgeous. He loved dogs and was great with kids. He could drive a tractor, cook, fix up a dilapidated house. He was just your everyday burly, fun loving handyman but he looked LIKE ZAC EFRON. He was sentimental. At one point, he even saved someone’s life. I mean, how could you not fall in love?

By the end of the film I just wanted to sign myself up for a looooong marriage and many little Logan babies.

The other night, after the Offspring finale, one of my friends posted the following e-card:

marry So you want to marry Patrick from Offspring?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It’s so true. And it got me thinking – which fictional characters have I wanted to marry through the years? Not date, not have just one night of passion with – but actually marry?

Here are some of the best:

Colin Firth as Mr Darcy

Which fictional character from television, a movie or a book would you want to marry? And far more importantly, why?

 

Comments

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251 Comments so far

  1. caro

    i will ponder! though i got all swooney at the thought of Aiden in SATC!!

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  2. Jaye Keen

    Patrick-offspring
    Jason Bateman in anything!
    Brad cooper-hangover
    Zach Galafanakis- I want a funny husband!!!
    MR Big!

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  3. peaches

    Chris Evans as Steve Rogers/Captain America. Okay, he may be a little square, but cut him some slack, he has 70 years to catch up on.

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  4. victoria2211

    Benedict Cumberbatch as Sherlock Holmes. Oh boy!

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  5. another fab single woman

    I like Damian Lewis! I am beginning to think I must have a thing for redheads.

    He is Marine Sergeant Nicholas Brody in Homeland and was in Band of Brothers. I haven’t yet watched either program; I actually saw / liked him as the possesive, smug, controlling Soames in The Forsyte Saga – at the end when he became kind-of good. *swoon off my chair!
    – Goodness knows why.

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    • Naomi

      I love Damien Lewis as well, and fell in love with him during forsyth. I think it was why I hated the series- I loved him and hated the girl who was supposed to be the heroine

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  6. gallifrey

    The Doctor (Number 10) in Doctor Who
    Daniel in Stargate
    Captain Jack in Torchwood
    Sam or Josh in The West Wing
    Adam in Spooks
    Alex in Family Ties

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  7. flo

    Mr Squiggle…….I’d sit on his face ANY day.

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  8. Simone

    While I’m nodding at all of the pretty guys mentioned here (esp John Corbett, Hugh Jackman and Viggo Mortenson…sigh), my biggest crush is Alan Rickman. Especially as Snape! Robert Downey Jnr is a very close second.

    I’m not sure what that means about my taste, but I think I’ve come to an age where ‘interesting’ has trumped ‘pretty’. Not that I’d say no to pretty…lol

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    • Anonymous

      Oh yeah, Alan Rickman is sexy. I don’t know why, he just is.

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  9. Anonymous

    Rob Lowe brothers and sisters
    And is it benjamin bratt on the practice

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  10. kadriye

    Since I was 15 and first started reading Diana Gabaldons novels I have adored Jamie Fraser. Who doesn’t love a Scottish Highlander?
    Love Colin Firth in anything Regency like Pride and Prejudice *sigh*
    And David Boreanz (sp?), especially when he was in Angel, a damaged, I’ll fix you kinda person.

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    • Simone

      Yep, it’s Jamie Fraser for me too. Sigh…

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  11. Anonymous

    Patrick Reid
    Aidan Shaw
    Mark Darcy
    …and, last but not least, Diver Dan…

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    • Rebecca

      Had forgotten about Diver Dan! I should be ashamed of myself.

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  12. Anonymous

    LOL at Gollum!
    John Corbett in anything
    Hugh Jackman in anything
    Louis CK (comedian)
    Owen from Grey’s Anatomy

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  13. Hotspotty

    Bill Compton…..Mmmmmmm

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  14. Kysa

    John Corbett in Sex and the City and Northern Exposure
    Rob Morrow in Northern Exposure
    George Clunie in ER (but not for marrying, just for shagging)
    Colin Firth in anything, he is the love of my life, just don’t tell my husband!
    And Patrick, oh Patrick. How I could gaze upon thee for hours. You are not quite Colin Firth, but perhaps you are more available? And closer to my age.

    (Oh stop it woman, you’re MARRIED!). Sigh. (And actually, I married a broody, silent type and it pisses me off no end!)

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  15. GirlPatrick

    Am a girl who is a bit like Patrick (the silent and withdrawn when unhappy or unsure bit not the ridiculously attractive!). I kind of get Patrick. Would there to be a different reaction to a female Patrick?

    Not surprising that my choice is romantic Tom in (500) days of Summer. Really JGL in anything.

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  16. Claire

    Two words, Don Draper.

    Also,
    Mr Darcy (the Colin Firth one)
    Noah from The Notebook,
    Jim from The Office.

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    • Claire

      Also, Liam Hemsworths in The Last Song. Though, I love any Hemsworth any way.

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    • Anon

      Yes to everyone except Don Draper! I’d love to marry Jon Hamm… Don, not so much. I prefer my men without severe Madonna-Whore complexes and drinking problems ;)

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  17. Susan

    Mmmmm mine is either Jack Dawson from Titanic or Captain Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Carribean

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  18. Me

    Some are obviously questionable like Hugh Sheridan, Hugh Grant and gollum. Agree with Mr Darcy, Jacob, Edward and Gilbert Blyth….

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  19. Tanya (Patrick's wife ;))

    There’s no denying Matthew Le Nevez is ridiculously attractive. I mean, those eyes are just… I digress.. but I don’t know that I’d want to marry Partick. He seems a bit too broody and non communicative to me. That being said. Oh my god. An anesthetist who happens to be insanely hot? I’d probably spring for the therapy.
    P.S Someone mentioned Gilbert Blythe from Anne of Green Gables before. I LOVED him. Girl hood crush. Sigh.

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  20. Tanya (Patricks wife ;))

    There’s no denying Matthew Le Nevez is ridiculously attractive. I mean, those eyes are just… I digress.. but I don’t know that I’d want to marry Partick. He seems a bit too broody and non communicative to me. That being said. Oh my god. An anesthetist who happens to be insanely hot? I’d probably spring for the therapy.
    P.S Someone mentioned Gilbert Blythe from Anne of Green Gables before. I LOVED him. Girl hood crush. Sigh.

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    • Tanya (Patrick's wife ;))

      Sorry, won’t let me delete this post with grammatical error :(

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  21. peppy

    From your suggestions:
    - Viggo Mortensen / Aragon
    - George Clooney / Doug Ross
    - Ryan Gosling in ANYTHING
    - Patrick from Offspring
    - Evan from Secret Life of Us
    - Carter from ER
    - Jordan Catalano from My So Called Life
    - Nathan Scott from One Tree Hill

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    • Amy

      Carter from er – hell yes!!!

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  22. Becbec

    Matthew McConaughey as Benjamin Barry in ‘How to lose a guy in 10 days’ – he is gorgeous!

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  23. Bassbassgirl

    I have read through all of the comments and am pleased to see quite a few of the guys I would marry mentioned, but the major person missing would have to be William McInnes character Max from the tv show Seachange. I loved him in that!

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  24. Minty

    Khal Drogo from “Game of Thrones” and yes, I know I have issues.

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    • Jules

      Tyrion Lannister from Game of Thrones – I too have issues!!!

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  25. Sunshine

    Gilbert from the Anne of Green Gable series.
    Be still my 12 year old heart.

    Actually, I still swoon.

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    • Sarah

      Oh, man, the amount of nights my 12 year old heart would fall asleep dreaming of Gilbert.

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  26. Anonymous

    Dominic West – The Wire

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  27. girlbarista

    Oooh, I’ve had a few… but most recently, Captain Jack Harkness from the Torchwood series.

    I can only adore him as a made-up character though, given that the actor who plays him is openly gay (sigh).

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    • Kris2040

      I always thought Captain Jack was TRI-sexual, he doesn’t mind what gender or planet you’re from…

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  28. Claire

    Yes Gilbert Blythe! How I wished he would call me carrots and tug on my piggytail….(were my hair red)….

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  29. Kirralee

    Laughed out loud when Gollum popped up at the end!!!

    I feel like I fall in love with a fictional character everytime I see a new film with anyone remotely good looking. Ewan McGregor in Salmon Fishing in the Yemen was my last love, what a sweetie. Many a vampire has also taken my fancy – Eric in True Blood anyone? Damon, Vampire Diaries? Something about dangerous men obviously.

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  30. Anon due to embarrassment

    Um. Tom Cruise as Stacee Jaxx.

    Not. Proud.

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    • Mb

      Its ok….you’re in a ‘safe place’ :)

      Stacee Jax – that’s ok
      TC -Get help!

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      • Anon due to embarrassment

        Oh, dear god no. TC in real life? *shudder*

        I mean, I’m sure he’s nice and all, but… *vomits a little*

        But seriously, man. As Stacee Jaxx he is insanely hot. Proof he’s a good actor, I guess.

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        • Mb

          Sigh…
          We all (well many of us!) have a little touch of the ‘he’s so hot in this movie, I would totally do the nasty with him.’ however for lots of reasons (he’s ‘real life gay’, he’s a scientologist, he’s John Travolta, and anyway I’m married) we would never admit that out loud.
          No no. We just console ourselves with the fantasy that in real life they can be the greatest douche known to modern man, but that is why it’s called ACTING, BECAUSE WE JUST DON’T CARE.

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  31. Buffy

    I love this post – Dr Reid and consequently Matt Le Nevez moved to number 1 in my 5 free passes. 2. David Boreanaz 3. Ryan Gosling 4. Michael Vartan 5. Michael Buble

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  32. Scarlett

    Love Patrick & Colin FIrth (in anything) & Ryan Gosling (in the Notebook & Crazy Stupid Love).
    But most of all Patrick.
    Patrick= Perfection.

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  33. Deb

    this list could get very long….

    yes Doug Ross in ER (Cloonmeister)
    yes Sam Seaborn from West Wing (Rob Lowe)
    and Coach Taylor from Friday Night Lights
    and Jimmy McNulty (sober) from The Wire
    and Ewan McGregor in Moulin Rouge
    Matt Damon in anything
    Fresh Prince Will Smith
    and most embarassing and this actor ONLY FOR THIS MOVIE…. Maverick in Top Gun
    oh god and major swoon Richard Gere in An Officer and a Gentleman

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  34. Kris2040

    Anyone for Sirius Black? No? Great!

    Colin Firth’s Mr Darcy
    Colin Firth in Love Actually
    Colin Firth in Fever Pitch

    Patrick’s pretty good, too!

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    • Kris2040

      Also Elliot Cowan as, er, Mr Darcy in Lost in Austen.

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      • Bassbassgirl

        Oh I am so with you on Elliot Cowan. The scene where Amanda makes him get into the lake…I feel hot and flustered just thinking about him :)

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  35. mumbles

    Captain Mal Reynolds (Firefly/Serenity)
    David Tennant’s Doctor Who
    Robb Stark (Game of Thrones)
    and of course Dr. Patrick Reid…hurry up season 4!!!

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  36. Rebecca

    Brax from Home and Away. He has me back visiting Summer Bay for the first time in years.

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  37. Jodie

    Oh Patrick. Please grab me & rip my clothes off & smash pot plants from have wild passionate sex.

    What about Geoffrey Dean Morgan in PS I Love You with Hillary Swank? Sucker for nice smiles & dimples. Sigh

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  38. Wannabe Squint

    I love these posts which make me think:

    “Oh thank god, it’s not just me”

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    • Natalia

      You love Zac Efron too?! Please say yes!

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      • Kristy

        I love Zac Efron <3 Not ashamed to admit it ;)

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      • becsparrow

        Natty, I loved Zac in Garden State (is that the movie he filmed with Natalie Portman?)

        He was magic.

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        • Kris2040

          Dude, that’s Zach Braff – JD from Scrubs!

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          • becsparrow

            Oh you’re right. Am I the only person who likes Zac Braff?

            The cheese stands alone ….

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            • N

              You are not alone… My friend from uni thinks he is sex-eee (how she says it!)

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      • Mrs M

        After having to sit through High School Musical 1, 2 and 3 too many times I started to wish I was in year 10 again and Zac was my boyfriend…. totally wrong on so many levels really!

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  39. Mb

    I’d totally do Mr D’Arcy.

    The only thing putting me off is the whole ‘it’s the 1800′s and I only shower every 6 weeks thing.’

    It would have to be on ‘bath day’. I dont ‘do’ smells.

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  40. perver

    Simon Baker Denny way back from his E Street days and now no one will ever surpass Patrick. Those amazing ‘come to bed’ eyes. The way he wears his jeans, his torso, that tat…. Just for starters!!

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  41. Mrs M

    Totally embarrassed to say I used to have a thing for Ioan Gruffudd in Horatio Hornblower. But Mr Darcy will always have a special place in my heart…. that lake scene – swoooooon! I must have a thing for men in puffy white shirts lol

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    • Lez

      Hornblower was my hero for a while there as well.

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    • Melsie

      I’ll join you in your embarrassment

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    • shelibeans

      Me TOO.

      Very rarely watched ABC back then but he gave me reason to!

      Sigh.

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  42. B

    Dean Winchester (Supernatural)
    Jax Teller (Sons of Anarchy)
    Jon Snow (Game of Thrones)

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    • Jess

      Ooh yes…I’d love me some Jon snow

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  43. mamaruns

    Larry Paul (Robert Downey Jr), Ally McBeal
    Mulder from The X files
    Ben from Felicity
    Agent Cooper from Twin Peaks (although Kyle McLachlan creeps me out in everything he’s done since)
    Seth from the OC
    Gilbert from Anne of Green Gables
    Matthew from a Discovery of Witches/Shadow of Night
    Ted Moseby from How I Met your Mother
    DEFINITELY Patrick from Offspring.

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    • Sarah

      Ben from Felicity *sigh*

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  44. Anonymous

    Patrick from offspring … I would definately kick his butt out of my bed……. Just so I could shag him on the floor…. He is HOT!!!!

    From happily married …husband knows my feelings here. Lol

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  45. Miss Nina

    Tough choice between Mr Darcy, Sam Seabourne and Gilbert Blythe. Swoon..

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  46. bakingmyselfhappy

    I am not ashamed to admit that I have been imagining my life with my future husband Patrick all day long!

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  47. The Mrs Smith

    My fictional character is from a book – not film/TV.

    Give me Jamie Fraser from the Outlander series any day….
    Scottish. Sexy. Sigh.

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    • kate

      Yes! My heart for Jamie Fraser (my mind still goes ‘James Alexander Malcolm Mackenzie Fraser’ every time, though). Longing for a movie/miniseries to be made, though he’d be so difficult to cast.

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      • The Mrs Smith

        I actually read that Diana Gabaldon has been approached on a number of occasions to make the series into a movie, and she has declined every time because she doesn’t want to cast (or have somebody else cast) Jamie. She wants him to remain an individual vision for each reader. I like that!

        Nothing worse than when a movie character doesn’t live up to the version you had created in your imagination!

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        • Lez

          Yep, he is the winner.

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        • kate

          Good decision, then. Not much could live up to the vision I have of Jamie, and anything else would just spoil him! He’s just so well-written and endearing. So many times I imagined myself in Claire’s shoes!

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    • OssieLeo

      Ooh yes, Jamie Frazer. What a man. I want one! Big and Scottish and smart and gentle…

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  48. Mrs Havel

    I am still not over Chris Havel…

    I love Patrick, but can never give my whole heart to him due to it still belonging to Chris…

    I still haven’t accepted that he may never come back. And marry me.

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    • Jessica Brown Hussein

      Me too, just loved Chris Havel, swoon!

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    • Jess

      You can have Chris and ill have Patrick

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  49. jedielf

    WHERE is David Tennant/Matt Smith as the Doctor from Doctor Who? I would only agree on the Han Solo/Indiana Jones of all those choices.

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  50. Anon

    How has Johnny Depp not made this list? As pretty much any of his quirky characters. What a honey!

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