Anyone who knows a teenager knows that image is everything and social media is life.
So when these parents needed a clever way to punish their teenage daughter, they decided to hit her where it would hurt. They took a modern approach to punishment, if you will. They confiscated her smart phone.
Ouch.
But they didn’t just leave it there. They went one further. While in possession of their daughter’s phone, they took some selfies with the in-built cam. And then they uploaded them to her Facebook page. And selected ‘make this my profile picture.’
Mum. Dad. Smile!
Take a teenage girl’s worst nightmare. Times is by one thousand. And dress it in the reindeer jumper Nana knitted her for Christmas.
THAT embarrassing.
But if there’s a prize for the ultimate parent revenge? This mum and dad are winning. (When her brother was asked why she was being punished he said “she got fresh.”)
Em Rusciano, who is the host of Mamamia Today on Austereo (tune in at 3pm every weekday on the Today Network), is another mother who believes in taking revenge on her kids – where appropriate. This is the story she told on air today:
Em Rusciano doin’ the radio thing.
“I have been known to seek revenge on my children, but it’s to teach them a lesson. My girls never put their dishes away and it drives me bonkers. Every time after dinner I say “girls, put your dishes in the dishwashers and every time they walk away.” Put it in the dishie, help Mumsie out.
So last week I basically set a small table in both of their beds. I put all the plates, the salad bowl…. I even put the saucepan I cooked steak in. I put the tongs, I put the cups, I even put the water jug half full and they I beautifully made their beds. Oh, there were hospital corners, I set up the teddy bears – it was amazing.
They got home and I’m just standing there smiling at them. ANd I had to wait. It was three hours until they went to bed but the screaming! It paid off. Well done, Rusciano.
Mum 1. Kids 0.”
And yes, Em had to wash the sheets afterwards. But she tells us the taste of revenge was worth the washing.
If you haven’t heard Em and Dave on the radio yet, here’s how they sound:
What have you done to get revenge on your kids? Or if you don’t have kids, what have your parents done to you?
Comments
99 Comments so far
I’ve said it before and i’ll say it again…
Taking petty revenge on your child makes you a shitty parent.
Always.
Revenge and deliberate embarrassment, these are the last pathetic ends of shitty parents.
Do you know what works the same? Taking away the phone. Shock horror “but she will go straight back to doing the same thing again”? Then don’t give it back to her. Keep it away. If she wants it back she can behave.
You know what doesn’t work? Making her resent you. Giving her the desire and now motivation to work harder at keeping things away from you to the point where the serious shit (actual bad things, not imagined) that you need to know about are hidden. All those peers at school are encouraging her and removing any possible fear motivation you’re trying to instil by telling her how much of an asshole you are.
Petty revenge on your child makes you a shitty parent. No matter how small. Can’t take it? I suggest you grow up and not have a child in the first place if you can’t handle one.
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I just spent 4 days and nights at the Phillip Island Motogp. First time ever. In a campervan. With my 9yr old grandson. And I didn’t embarrass him once. It’s the opposite of being an embarrassment, I know, but if you have trouble thinking up wonderfully embarrassing/awkward moments/life lessons for your kids, (which, by the way, I never had any trouble with), doing something ‘awesome’ and ‘legend’ is just as powerful a tool. And quite an ego boost at the same time!
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I work with a lady who has (close to adult) kids who would regularly use her phone without asking. She got sick of it and put a nude pic of her hubby as her background. Needless to say, the kids don’t touch it anymore!
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My friend wets the clothes left on the floor and then places them in the chest freezer- priceless for those “where are my jeans” moments!!!
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My parents are too technologically incapable to use social media but when I was younger and at school i was err…slow at getting out of bed in the mornings. My dad used to threaten to throw a bucket of cold water over me but I assumed he was just bluffing. Until he actually did it one day (well it was just a full glass, not a bucket). I jumped out of bed every morning after that!
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Thought the mom & dad photo on Facebook is hilarious. It’s harmless in my opinion, if my parents had done that to me I probably would have been shocked, then amused. Maybe I have the same sense of humor as these parents.
I most certainly would have preferred this sort of discipline over the discipline my parents gave me in high school…
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Wow, some hard core reactions! Is this not just a version of Dad’s daggy dancing or photos of you on the potty at a milestone birthday party.
Heaven forbid our kids be expected to be able to handle a little bit of embarrassment, delicate little snowflakes they are. Wow!
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Hmmm, I think it’s a little different from Dad’s daggy dancing. My dad is a daggy dancer but he’s never done it to humiliate me. He is just honestly that terrible, which is why he doesn’t dance unless he’s drunk.
This, however, is a deliberate attempt to humiliate, which I don’t think is ever okay. I’m not keen on the “photos on the potty” type of slideshow at 21sts and the like either. Unless, of course, it’s known that the birthday boy/girl is the type to not mind that kind of thing. I know plenty of people who wouldn’t mind and honestly, I’d probably put myself in that category.
That said, I don’t know if this photo would have the intended effect. I hate the intent that these parents had but if my parents had done this, I would be more embarrassed on their behalf than I would be for myself. They are the ones who look like idiots, not their daughter.
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I don’t know if it was an attempt to humiliate. I would imagine if it was they would have put up an embarrassing photo of their daughter not themselves.
Again though, we don’t know these people or what led up to this, so anything we assume about them or their motivations is just from our own perspective.
Kids, teenagers especially can drive you to distraction and sometimes the hardest lessons are the ones they remember.
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and often the ones that are dealt with a bit of humour. In the article it was mentioned that she ‘got fresh’. They could’ve grounded her but they chose to deal with it with a bit of humour. Maybe people should give them the benefit of the doubt and assume that they know their child well enough that this would be the best form of discipline for her.
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I think it’s adults here and probably not the kid who are more devastated by what these guys did. Completely over the top reaction with all the claims of damaging etc.
I’m no fan of the photos I mentioned either. I just don’t think that people would be carrying on about how “damaging” that would be, and I think these parents *probably* know their kid pretty well.
All it would take is someone saying “Dude! What is up with your profile pic?” and the kid changing it. Really not the catastrophe it’s being made out to be.
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I agree, it’s easily changed. I’m a teacher and I can see kids simply saying something along the lines of “Oh, my god, my parents are sooooo embarrassing. They think they’re so cool and they’re not’, and all the other kids joining in saying how embarrassing their parents are too. To me this looks like a family with a good sense of humour. While I don’t know these people they look like the types who would have a good laugh together.
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Kate, that is horrible. Reading a diary out loud is absolutely crossing a line. However, it does differ significantly from these parents.
Posting a silly photo on your child’s FB profile is not some soul-crushing act. Yes social media is important in the lives of teens, but if they are treating it as a deeply personal space, where they share intimate details of their lives with 600 “accaintances” then who is really using it incorrectly, the parents or child?
Call me crazy, but as a 26-yr-old, high school teacher, I do not find this particularly hurtful. I’m pretty in touch with my teenage students & I tried to imagine how I would feel if my parents did it to me as a 17 yr old. Yes, i’d be embarrassed. That’s it. (And I’m pretty damn sure it WAS in jest.) Yes, teens have fragile egos but we gotta give them some credit! Kids are much more resilient than a lot of ppl on here are claiming. Daisy, I know that statistic about suicide, believe me. But kids who suicide come from broken, abusive or neglectful families, histories of mental illness or being completely alone in the world. They do not suicide over their parents posting a silly pic on their FB wall.
Yes, kids need parents who understand & nurture them, but they also need to be reminded WHO the parent/s are in the relationship sometimes. And sometimes embarrassment is the only way to get through to them! This girl obviously did something her parents didn’t approve of. We need to stop breeding insecurity & a sense of entitlement in teens by tip-toeing around their every feeling.
H
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I’m not saying anyone would suicide about this kind of thing. I was merely saying that what seems a small thing to us can seem a whole lot bigger to some teenagers.
Maybe I did come across as overreacting about these particular parents but it wasn’t really about them. It was about applauding something which can be copied indiscriminately by people which can lead to other things such as bullying. My objection was probably not to these parents really, more this site for promoting it as a funny or good idea. As a high school teacher, you must know where I am coming from.
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Give parents a little bit of credit. I’m sure we’re not all going to go out and start posting embarrassing pics of ourselves on our kids facebook page! As a teacher I also agree with Lauren. Kids are resilient. They’ve posted a picture of themselves pulling silly faces not some humiliating picture of their child.
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I’ve just turned 18 and I really don’t think this photo is a big deal, most teenagers I know would roll their eyes and laugh at Mum and Dad thinking they’re funny and then just change their profile picture! I seriously can’t imagine it causing any long-term trauma!
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Haha I am 23 and my mother still puts dirty dishes in my bed if I don’t wash up straight away.
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My Dad just liked to embarrass me purely because I got so embarrassed! Once when I was about 15 I had some verrrrry cool people who I didn’t know too well with me in the kitchen of the ski lodge we were members of. Dad comes in, wearing his lycra (skin tight) skiing thermals and a bandana tied around his head. But how did he choose to make his grand entrance? By sliding in at top speed on his socks and striking a pose in the process.
My new friends left pretty quickly, but I love my dad more than anything!
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I think parents like this teach us that the world doesn’t end if we’re a bit embarrassed occasionally and that having a bit of fun and letting loose is more important than being serious and cool. A good sense of humour and resilience gets you through some tough times. This is what I learnt from my ‘embarrassing Dad’.
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My daughter was forever getting me to book her flights online because she didn’t have a credit card to pay for them. She always said she would pay me back but conveniently forgot each time….until she started to get some special request Low fat meals on the plane. It wasn’t what the meal was but the fact she was singled out before everyone else got theirs…..quiet revenge!
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I think a parents job is to embarrass their children. My dad in particular used to play jokes and embarrass us in public all the time. My friends though he was hilarious and I was lucky because their dads were boring and serious. I think it was his ability to not take himself so seriously all the time and not be afraid to be a bit silly in public. However, my dad was also loving and caring and he was the first one I’d go to for help. He still is and he’s still embarrassing me and his grand children, and they think he is hilarious!
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Em, I thought your revenge was priceless … but also just a little bit scary in its dedication to detail and planning. How did you find the energy to put such a meticulous operation together?
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My mums revenge when I was a teenager. Before the age of mobiles(!), I used to sit on the kitchen phone for hours (puberty blues style). My mum used to go crazy about my phone usage…..until she got so jack of it that when my very cool and extremely hot 16yr old boyfriend called, she told him in a very mother voice that:
“KTT can’t come to phone right now because she’s sitting on the toilet. She’ll probably be a while too since she is doing a very large and rather uncomfortable poo. But she will see you at school tomorrow. Byeeeeeee”.
Yeahhhhhhhhh, mum!!
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I really think that there are ways of getting your point across without resorting to publicly humiliating your child. At least Em’s punishment was restricted to the home, although I’m not sure how I feel about her casually broadcasting it on radio. Yes, I’m a bleeding heart, soft touch parent, but I can’t help but think they’ve just severed their chances of her having an open and honest dialogue with them when it really matters.
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If you listen to her other discussions about her kids it’s pretty clear that they have a close relationship.
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Great ideas here, pitty there are not more response on how to seek revenge/punish your kids!
I might write all that stuff down, for later times…
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Two lessons with one post! Way to go.
1. Don’t mess with Mum and Dad.
2. Set up security on your phone and Facebook app.
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No one says “fully sick”, only oldies do , thinking they’re cool. Lame
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No, honey, the oldies don’t think they’re being cool, they’re just taking the piss.
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but if no one says it, who are they taking the piss out of?
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I was hoping they were using ‘Fully sick’ to be ironic, seeing as the article is about parents being embarrassing and all…
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Haha going to remember the fart bomb one for future reference lol
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that is way crossing the line. taking her personal phone (which she probably payed for with her part time job money) and hacking into her PERSONAL facebook account? i suppose you can divorce your parents for a reason!
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because every 16 year old pays for their own phone?
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Yes, there are reasons for being able to divorce parents. I’d wager that them taking the mobile THEY probably pay for and doing something as harmless as changing a profile photo (something friends and their partners do regularly on my FB feed) is probably pretty low on the list that a court would accept as reason for divorce from parents.
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You can’t have it both ways. Petty revenge on your child makes you a shitty parent.
But hacking into a Facebook profile is very illegal, thanks to various (moronic) Federal laws, and counts as a cyber crime that includes fraud to it’s criminal case.
What the parents did IS illegal and people have already been successfully prosecuted regarding it.
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After arguing with my son for weeks to clean his room and my insistence that things would start ‘growing’ in there, I set off a sly fart-bomb and shut the door. He returned an hour later and Let’s just say his room stays clean from now on.
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My husband has put my son’s cigarette butts that he’s thrown carelessly about the back porch in his bed.
My oldest daughter used to leave an empty glass just beside the lounge so that you would trip over it of a night, so I started leaving it just outside her bedroom door for her and her boyfriend to “discover” of a morning.
I may try the dishes thing though with my 2 youngest. It’s really starting to get to me.
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Won’t let me edit again…..
Should read her and her…..instead of herald her
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There is a difference between taking revenge on your kids in the privacy of you own home (love Em’s dinner trick, have done the same thing with wet towels!!!) – and ridiculing your child in front of the whole world.
What on earth has happened to parenting – was this about them or their daughter? There is nothing wrong with taking funny photos and putting it on your child’s phone, or even posting it on their child’s facebook page – she could easily have kept it to herself and a few friends… how did it go viral ? Who let that happen?
We wonder why people think its OK to troll…”I didn’t think you would get upset about it … I thought it was funny”, The only ones to lose here are the parents of this girl who will never trust them again (and by now has set up a facebook page that her parents know nothing about!)
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You have no idea what led up to this. I lot of people”hack each other’s Facebook accounts and put up posts that the owner of the acct would never write etc and it sits there on their wall.
The article also doesn’t tell how this story went viral, so it doesn’t mean the parents leaked it. There are far worse things they could have done. I remember seeing a father shoot a kids laptop/phone on a you tube clip. That is probably slightly worse, don’t you think?
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If my parents or anyone else’s parents did that I would think it hilarious! It will be embarrassing when it first happens but really… I think most people would think the parents pretty cool
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Oh why didn’t I think of this twenty yrs ago. Oh, that’s right, no smart phones.
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Child is too young yet but as for husband…. I kept asking him to wipe the bench after he made his sandwiches and he kept leaving crumbs on the bench so one day I sprinkled all the crumbs on his side of the bed. Funnily enough he never did it again…..!
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gotta memorise that one!
does he also leave dirty clothes on the floor instead of putting them into the laundry basket?Any suggestions for that?
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Any suggestions on how to get DP to put the toilet seat down? I don’t appreciate slipping in when I wander into the loo at 3 in the morning half asleep!
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My nearly 11 year old son was just standing behind me while I was reading this article. His comment? “They look funny. Who are they?” cue an attempt to copy the dad’s facial expression.
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I’m so surprised at the negative comments. I honestly thought what the parents did was HILARIOUS! I was literally taking notes for when my kids, in just a short amount of time, hit the teenage years. As parents of teenagers, are we supposed to suck it up and never comment, never use humour, never point out the bleeding obvious i.e. that teenagers could do with a good kick up the backside sometimes? Their egos run the gamut between fragile and out of control! A reality check (and a reminder that their parents are awesomely funny) should be compulsory.
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Em – you are my hero!
My kidlets are still young but I have been known to “chuck a tanty” when I’ve been asked for yet another thing but they haven’t done as they’ve been told, only to have them say with exasperation, “Muuuuuum, that’s annoyiiiiing”….
Really?!?!?! (I do go on to make the comparison between mine tanty and theirs and “How might Mummy feel?” ….I like my tanties to mean something
)
Oh I look forward to the teenaged years
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I can’t believe some of the responses to this – was it immature? Absolutely! And hilarious. Sometimes old fashion discipline just doesn’t cut it.
It doesn’t say what the crime was so who knows if it warranted a ‘child psychologist’ approved punishment.
All I see are parents who obviously have a sense of humor. Lighten up. I’m sure the girl will be bringing it up in conversations in 20 years time and they all will still be laughing about it – good memories!
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My dad used to do this!! DIRTY DISHES ON MY BED. Funny in hidsight but at the time I was furious!
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Humiliation in front of peers is discipline now? Not the best way to be taken seriously and maintain a good relationship!
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Great minds Em…… It’s was my go to Stunt when needing to make the very same point with my husband.
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Go Em ..sometimes you need to think outside the box to get thru to teenagers . I used to fold my daughters washing and she would put it on her bed and leave it there until it fell off onto the floor and then eventually pick it up and put in laundry hamper to be rewashed .So one day I waited til she was in her room and I walked in and threw all her clean washing all over her floor .When she asked what I was doing I just said ” sweetheart I’m just saving us both a whole lot of time ” I find the washing now goes straight into cupboard !
P.s Daisy lighten up or a fragile teenager is exactly what you will end up with
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Well, I understand that I come across as too serious but as I said in an earlier response, 2 to 3 high school students suicide every week in Australia.
My youngest child is 19 and I have 3 in their 20′s, none of whom are fragile. I am also a schoolteacher.
Parenting well is hard! BTW, I like your laundry example. Iam sure that I am forever rewashing clean washing, because that is the way a teenager cleans up!
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I can’t imagine that parents would do something like that to their kid if they thought they couldn’t handle it. Relating this to suicide is pretty steep.
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Just making the point that teenagers are vulnerable, not suggesting that this would lead to such a thing. I just mean people need to be aware and make thoughtful choices when doing stuff like this.
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i do this with my teenage son:) He doesnt care either way so why stress myself out:)
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See, I like Em’s way because it makes a great point, but the embarrasment isn’t there.
I remember the feeling of being humiliated in public, especially as a teenager, when everything is heightened; there is no way I could do that to my daughter.
Sure, you can make the punishment fit the crime, and confiscating a smart phone would be devastating to a teenage girl, but I think the public emabarrasment would just contribute to widening the gap between child and parents. How could she trust them now? I believe a child needs to trust their parents implicitly if they want to be able to steer them right.
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is it really THAT embarrassing to have a photo of your parents on facebook? yikes
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Once, I snuck out to a party and got very drunk, as one does (or I did, at least). Dad came into my room at 7am announcing “Get up, we’re going hiking!” which I normally loved. So off we went. He drove like a madman on the twisty mountain roads: “What’s the matter? You look a bit green!” and set a cracking pace for the walk. Of course I couldn’t admit anything, but he never lost his smug smile!
To this day he swears he knows nothing, it was a beautiful day and all he wanted to do is go for a walk.
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I love this! Your Dad is awesome!!
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See, now *that* is a creative and reasonable revenge!
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One of my clients did something similar. Her oldest daughter used to sneak out and get drunk all the time as a teenager, so by the time her third was 16 she had learned a few tricks. One night when her 16 year old was meant to be staying at a friends house nearby she got a call from a hospital an hour away saying “your daughter is in emergency with mild alcohol poisoning.” It was two am. She asked how her daughter was, the nurse responded she had had her stomach pumped, but was absolutely fine and resting, so she said she would come and get her first thing in the morning. The next day she picked her up at 7am and took her straight to netball where she had to coach her young team and then umpire. I don’t think she ever snuck out again to get drunk!
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Good on you Em!!!
Im 100% down with this, do I think what they did was wrong no, kids have become way too entrenched in their social media and subsequnetly seem to think image is everything. I know as a teenager I was a complete hormone crazy girl thinking fashion, boys, music and being popular was the MOST important things in life. My mother allowed me a 16th birthday party at the house, boys & girls inc, she was very embarrasing refusing to leave us alone, dancing crazy to the music, telling embarrasing stories and the embarrasing childhood pics she plastered everywhere. Yes I lost one or two friends but seriously where they really my friends in the first place? the rest of my friends thought it was classic and tried to outdo what my mum did with their own stories of parents getting even!!
Did it Scare me NO, did it make me less confident NO, am a broken adult because of it NO, im well adjusted I dont care about being embarrsed, pft thats life right nothing goes perfect and you are not perfect.
Sometimes adult punishes get you know where you have to think at their level and what would really be a punishment to them and make them realise when they need to start treating people with respect. If that means doing something childish or immature as some would put it you know what so be it youve at least taught your children the only way they will liste.
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Am I the only one who sees this as a bit of light hearted fun? I know that when you’re a teenager life is hard, and things are soooooo embarrassing, but really? If this is the worst thing your parents do in the embarrassment stakes, then you’re doing pretty well, I think.
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Those parents have NO IDEA! That punishment was immature. The fragile self image of a young teenager is not to be trifled with. It is a breach of trust. I am not humourless but I bet it wasn’t funny to the girl. I am totally familiar with FB hacking and frape but it is usually done in jest.
Maybe this girl has thicker skin than some so maybe I am wrong but I don’t think this should be promoted as a positive thing.
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Are you serious? It’s totally harmless. The worst she’ll get from her friends is an “oh my god, your parents are SO embarrassing” and I’m pretty sure most teenagers deal with that anyway!
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I agree Sare..it’s also a reminder about friends lists..the only people who would be able to comment on that photo are on her friends list (assuming she has privacy settings set). So anyone on her friends lists should be her FRIEND. Any negative comments, bullying, teasing etc from people on your friends lists, means those people have to GO!!
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Hi, the 600 or so people in teenagers friends lists aren’t actually all their friends. Theory and practise don’t match up.
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That’s what I’m saying. Real friends don’t bully.
Just get rid of that other pesky 500 or so if they do!
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Well if they’re not their friends they shouldn’t worry about what they think! Lighten up, we were all embarassed by our parents and as parents we’ll all embarass our kids. I don’t think parental embarassment would be the sole cause of teenage suicide.
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Why do you assume all teenagers and young people have 600 “friends” on Facebook? I’m 22 and have around 70-90 people on my friends list, all of whom I’ve met in person and know from school, previous jobs and through friends.
I would imagine that if the parents have the knowledge to use their daughter’s Facebook account to change the profile picture, they would also be the kind of parents to have an open discussion with her about privacy settings and the people she should be adding.
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I knew I’d cop flak for this but may I remind everyone that 2 to 3 high schools students suicide EVERY WEEK in Australia.
I don’t presume to know everything but I do know that. I am also a school teacher and have 4 young adult children of my own, none of whom were mollycoddled. While no doubt some of the people who disagree with me have an informed opinion, I’ll bet some responders do not yet have teenagers, or fully understand how the teenage thing with FB works these days. Your average teenager has anywhere from 600 to 1000 FB friends. FB friends are not necessarily real friends.
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For the record I have a special needs teenager. He is a bully’s dream. Generally I find catastrophising every situation to worst case scenario does not help him.
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Fair enough but who said anything about catastrophising every situation. I only object to the article applauding immature parenting and poor role modelling. I also tried to point out how teenagers responses are not the same as ours.
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It’s one photo, you have no idea how they parent the rest of the time. This article doesn’t mention anything about their family dynamics or anything else.
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You mentioned teens committing suicide, that’s pretty catastrophic!
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They posted a photo of themselves pulling silly faces. If this is going to leave her with deep psychological damage then I think she was always going to be a lost cause regardless if they did it or not.
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“lost cause” ???
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What is frape?
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it’s short for “facebook rape” not a very nice term. it’s when someone gets on to your facebook and makes a status, like “I just did a poo” or something stupid like that.
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and a stupid status like that is called Facebook rape?? Give me strength.
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Facebook rape
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im sorry to be rude but you must not have teenagers. I think its awesome and i would have done it…had i been able to pry the darn phone from her fingers at anytime in a 24/7 timeframe:)
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At me? I have 4 children, one of whom is still a teenager. I am also a schoolteacher. I don’t think you are rude. I am all for discussion!
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i did something similar to these parents just the other night. My 17 year old son has me as a friend on facebook but I am blocked you could say. You know how you can click on their profile and only see some stuff….Photos of myself and one of his friend’s mums made their way onto his page. I had only met this mum that night at a breastcancer fundraiser . I told her how he has blocked me and doesnt like me associating with other friends mothers etc. She straight away said. ‘ lets fix this little shit then ” …..lots of drunken selfies were taken and uploaded via her daughter , who has my son as a friend on facebook……Glad to say they got lots of likes ……
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Drunken selfies? Inappropriate. And I would say that at a dinner party.
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Daisy, Relax! I’d say that at a dinner party too!
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I can’t understand why all these parents want to get on their teenagers Facebook pages. Saying “let’s fix this little shit then”, just makes you seem overbearing. For god sake, he’s 17! Leave him alone, and let him have a bit of privacy.
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So becuase they are Mothers they aren’t allowed to get drunk? Or can’t take selfies? Whilst I am not into selfies myself, why is that so inappropriate? No wonder we have a country of cotton wool wrapped kids!
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No, but they took drunken selfies and put it on their child’s wall. It’s called role models.
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Seeking revenge upon your child through humiliation = completely juvenile and wrong
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I think Em’s revenge is great, but I know how important social media is to my younger cousins. Forget about embarrassment, the reactions from peers would be brutal if their parents did this. Surely just taking the phone away would be punishment enough for “getting fresh”.
I’ve never understood parents who seem to revel in humiliating their kids. My parents had a field day when I was a teenager, with the result being I never, ever invited friends home because I didn’t want my parents to share all my embarrassing stories, video’s and pictures. I know they thought it was just a bit of fun, but I had enough embarrassment to deal with at school, I didn’t need to humiliated in my own home. It didn’t build character, it just made me feel unsettled and insecure.
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ALL parents did that and I dont think it was about getting revenge just more about thinking its funny, I dont know of a parent that didnt do that, mine certainly did, but you know it taught me that who cares what people think. It makes you stronger, teaches you how to handle being embarrased, nothing wrong with the occassional thump back to earth and hey you know what, all teenagers need that, I certainly did. I never stopped my friends coming around even though my family where super embarrassing because when I went to my friends houses their parents did that too, parents arent there to make you look good they are there to teach you, guide you. Their actions have made you the person you are today
Lets be honest teenagers are selfish, smart arse, talking back, hormone fueled people who looks, impressions and what people think is what life is all about. We as parents need to teach them its not like that at all and if you dont teach them that theyll get a shock of horror when they become adults.
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My friends parents never did what mine did to me. Sure they made jokes and were silly, but they weren’t ever mean about it and they knew where the line was eg. doing it in front of a few best friends but reining it in when at a birthday party or school event.
My parents read my diary to my friends, they made jokes about my looks, they shared incredibly personal things I had trusted them with, when they had to go to my school for whatever reason they would get changed into pajamas and make a scene so everyone saw them…they knew it humiliated me and that was the goal. The more upset I was the more fun they had. I’ve seen many parents behave the same way, getting off on embarrassing their children.
Their actions have made me who I am today. An incredibly shy, insecure wreck who trusts no one.
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oh Kate, that’s just awful. That’s not revenge ( and I don’t like that word) that behaviour is just plain cruel and I would like to say emotionally abusive. You take care of you xxx
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I don’t think what your parents did is right, but I wouldn’t compare it to the parents here. A parent posting a picture of themselves pulling silly faces on their kids FB might be a bit embarrassing, but every teenager finds their parents embarrassing. Its not ANYTHING like reading the contents of your diary to your friends. How awful.
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Sharing personal, private things is never ok. But these parent posted a pic of themselves not their child and as a punishment for ‘getting fresh’ not just because they wanted a bit of attention.
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