Honest toddler ROFL.  The Honest Toddler

This is Honest Toddler






Not since the deliciously wicked Suri’s Burn Book has a blog so completely taken the social media world by storm.

The Honest Toddler is a scathing, brilliant, laugh-out-loud blog  where the diabolical musings of a three-year-old toddler (who has the intellect of Einstein and the warmth of Idi Amin) are shared in a completely adult way.

Honest Toddler tweets from @HonestToddler. Here’s a taste…


You don’t need to be a parent to get a kick out of it. And if you are a parent this blog will confirm what you long suspected: we’re on their payroll.

This from Yahoo:

The best part is the posts are designed to be a de facto advice manual for parents to help them better serve their “beautiful, gifted children.”

“Maybe it will help to think about why you decided to become a parent. Most likely you were bored and looking for someone to serve. Now that you have the opportunity to make your life mean something, do your best. Wake up with a smile on your face and say this fourteen times, ‘Broken food is disgusting, when I serve it I look a little ugly,'” writes the little dictator.

Here’s an excerpt from a  recent blog post the Honest Toddler wrote about the Super Nanny:

You walk around with that wool cloak looking like the manager of Hogwarts. I’m not scared of you. The day you come into my home expect Armageddon because I’m going to bring it. Nanny, you don’t know my life. You don’t know my situation. Were you at my birth? Are you my midwife? No. So you don’t know what I need.


Your turn now. If you were an Honest Toddler, what would you say?

Comment Guidelines: Imagine you’re at a dinner party. Different opinions are welcome but keep it respectful or the host will show you the door. We have zero tolerance for any abuse of our writers, our editorial team or other commenters. You can read a more detailed outline of our commenting guidelines HERE.

And if you’re offensive, you’ll be blacklisted and all your comments will go directly to spam. Remember what Fonzie was like? Cool. That’s how we’re going to be – cool. Have fun and thanks for adding to the conversation.

Important note for those wishing to comment anonymously: If you wish to remain anonymous, please simply use 'Anonymous' or 'Guest' as your user name and type in guest@mamamia.com.au as the email.