By KATE HUNTER
I’m no fan of the death penalty, ever, so I was happy to read drug charges against 35 year-old Australian Emma L’Aiguille in Malaysia had been dropped.
This, from news.com.au on Saturday:
Emma L’Aiguille leaves the Kuala Lumpur prison complex
“A VICTORIAN mum who sensationally escaped the death penalty in Malaysia yesterday vowed to devote her second chance at life to her six children.
Emma L’Aiguille’s 115-day nightmare ended when she became the first foreigner to be released from prison without DNA evidence or the forensic report into the drugs being complete.
“I thought I was gone. I didn’t think I’d ever see my family again or that this day would come,” she told the Herald Sun.
“I’m still pinching myself and can’t believe that I am out of jail.”
Prosecutors stunningly dropped her charges after accepting her defence team’s argument there was no evidence connecting the mother-of-six to drug trafficking.”
After reading that story and seeing this front page:
Nova breakfast presenter and mother of 4, Kate Langbroek used Twitter to voice cynicism about the use of the word ‘mum’ to describe a woman who had chronically neglected and barely ever even parented her children.
Kate Langbroek’s tweet
Whichever way you look at it, Emma L’Aiguille’s life is sad. It’s been a misassembled puzzle with pieces broken and missing.
Her education was piecemeal. Emma’s first child, Tayla was born when she was 16. Seven more pregnancies followed, fathered by different men. One baby was lost when Emma miscarried at 17 weeks, and another died of cot death aged only one month. Tayla sees to the only child with a relationship with her mother (she’s being raised by her grandmother).
The other children are with their fathers or being cared for by family members. I’m not quite sure – a lot has been written about Emma L’Aiguille’s complicated relationships, but it’s not clear where all her kids are. Which is fine, because it’s none of our business – I just hope they are okay and having a more grounded start to life than Emma had.
Which brings us to those headlines.
Although Emma’s eldest – Tayla – was raised by her grandmother, she sees Emma as her mum and from all accounts is desperate to be re-united with her. But what about the other 5 kids? Has she packed them a school lunch, put them on the potty, sat through a Yo Gabba Gabba video. Okay, even I haven’t done that last one.
But the question is valid – does giving birth make you a mum? Surely there’s more to parenthood than biology. Kate Langbroek thinks so, scoffing at Emma’s claims that she’s a homemaker at heart, she tweeted: ‘”I have to have someone to take care of. I like to stay at home, cook and clean.” Really? Tell that to your SIX abandoned kids…’
Emma D’Aiguille says she’s going to use her freedom to devote herself to her children. Do you think that’s even possible – can a woman suddenly decide it’s time to be ‘mum’?
Do you think that women can just decide to be a mother? Does having kids really make you a mum?
Comments
87 Comments so far
Just as providing sperm doesn’t make a father, giving birth doesn’t make a mother, it’s the events and actions that follow.
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But providing sperm DOES make you a father and giving birth DOES make you a mother. Even if they don’t go on to care for the child they are still the biological mother and father.
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Dr Phil (yeah I know……) says that mother and father are verbs as well as nouns…..he stresses working on the verb, as actions are what make you a parent, not just the ability to have a child.
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I just wonder why the different treatment by the media because someone is a mum or a woman. I am sure we would not be looking for all the excuses and reasons for sympathy were this a bloke, he would just be an arsehole drug mule that deserved what he gets. No, a bloke would barely cop a mention in the media and he would be looking at death or a life sentance right about now.
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I’m a man and just want to say how over these crying “why doesn’t someone think of the men?” comments I am. God, they’re really grating. You’d think men had been oppressed for centuries and that we don’t currently live in a patriachly society where men get many, many more privledges simply for being born male.
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Fair enough, point taken. It is not just me though, lots of people point out all sorts of double standards relating to gender issues on this site.
This site spends every ounce of energy bringing the disadvantage of women to the fore. This is a noble cause, and understandable given the target market of this site .
However, I dont see the issue of pointing out when there appears to be a double standard the other way around. If you spend so much time fighting the nobile fight for equality, you have to be true to the cause from both sides, not just one.
99% of content on this site is still directed at pointing out the disadvantage women suffer – I dont think anyone finds that grating.
When it comes to the treatment of offenders by the media and courts, I do feel very strongly that there is a difference in treatment based upon gender. I dont know why this cant be highlighted or discussed as one simple comment amongst many.
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It’s just generally the tactic is used to divert attention and resources away from fighting for equality… it’s a drag. It’s a tactic used by men and men’s group to try and become the ‘victim’ and as a way to refuse to acknowledge any gender privledges they (we – as a man I recognise my privledge) receive.
And frankly, let’s be honest – there’s a long way to go in society before we need to start worrying about the unequal treatment of men before we even get close to rivalling the unequal treatment of women.
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I didnt know it was an ‘either or’ thing, this equality fight, I didnt realise it was so black and white.
Here I was thinking that equality and justice meant just that, equality for all, rather than those Just Jay deems are members of the worthy group.
I tell you what, let me know when you feel some sort of victim status quo has been reached overall between males and females, and I will let all the males that are disadvantaged in society know that they are now allowed a voice to discuss their own issues.
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“Just Jay”, you say you’re a man, but I believe a woman wrote those words. And a man would be treated different in this situation, he would still be there. I believe she played the “I’m a mum”, card to get out of jail. and it worked. It wouldn’t for a man, and that’s a fact.
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Just Jay is a woman, not a man. It’s obvious.
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If I leave my email on here pinkeye would you mind messaging me with next weeks lottery numbers?
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