By JAMILA RIZVI
Tick tock. Gulp. Well, this is confronting. There are apps to keep track of your period, to monitor weight loss and to measure the pace of your morning run.
And now there is The Wonder Clock app that can tell you how long you have before your eggs dry up.
The Wonder Clock counts down the years, months, days, hours, minutes and seconds until a woman becomes infertile. It’s very helpful because without this clever new piece of technology, the whole ‘having kids’ option might just slip your mind. Whoops, I forgot to have a baby.
The app was created by an Amercian woman, Mira Kaddoura who says she wanted to ‘empower’ (there’s that word again) women to be able to face their fears about infertility. Kaddoura came up with the idea after a doctor raised the issue unexpectedly during a checkup.
After you download the app, you just plug in your date of birth and the Wonder Clock generates this horrible, pulsating, neon pink numerical sign.
The Wonder Clock website is Mira’s own clock. However since she has declined to reveal her own age, we have no way of knowing the formula that the wonder clock uses, or at what age it ‘stops’. The accuracy of the app is pretty questionable given that age is the only factor it considers – forgetting that quality of sperm, diet, lifestyle issues, weight and a range of other health factors can also affect fertility. (If you’re actually concerned about fertility, then you talk to someone who can consider all of this, like, say a DOCTOR).
Once your download is complete, the neon sign ticks down slowly, methodically and you can literally watch the fertile years of your life being whittled away.
And then… BOOM.
We haven’t been told what actually happens when the clock runs out but we presume that your iPhone just explodes.
Or perhaps there is just a loud siren, accompanied by a flashing sign that says “INFERTILE WOMAN – APPROACH AT YOUR OWN RISK”.
What we do know for sure, is that we no longer need fussy old aunts, asking us if we’ve found a fella and discreetly whispering “time is moving on dear, you’re not as young as you used to be, tick tock, tick tock.”
Now you can have that constant nagging with you at all times – and for the bargain basement price of just $1.95.
Would you use the Wonder Clock app? Do you or did you worry about your biological clock? Has a doctor every broached the subject with you or anyone you know?