Thomas Kelly
by BEN FORDHAM
How do you stop an 18 year old who wants to go out with their mates?
On Saturday, Thomas Kelly told his mum and dad he was planning a night out in Kings Cross. He was excited about being invited to a party with a new friend. His parents didn’t want him to go to Kings Cross and told him so.
But it was a special occasion (it always is, isn’t it?) and it was only going to be a few quiet drinks to celebrate a birthday. We’ve all been there… begging our parents to just relax and trust us for once. Hey, I’m 18 now!
How were Kathy and Ralph supposed to say no to their eldest son who’d grown into a mature young man? He had beautiful friends, a lovely new girlfriend and had earned himself a cadetship at a top accountancy firm in Sydney. He was more likely to be spending nights studying commerce at Macquarie University than hanging out in Kings Cross. But that’s where he ended up on Saturday night.
The final words from his parents were way too familiar… “Please be careful, please take care”.
Thomas had only been out for a few minutes when someone stepped out of the shadows and punched him in the head for no reason. There was no argument. There was no fight. There was no robbery. Just one punch.
Mum and dad were at home watching TV with their two other children when the hospital called. By this stage, Thomas was already undergoing emergency surgery but his head injuries were severe. Before they knew it, Kathy and Ralph were being asked to make a decision about turning off the life support.
Last night, I spoke to Ralph about his beautiful boy who died for no reason:
“He was eighteen years old. He had his very first girlfriend. He’s never shaved. He was going out for the very first time to experience life. And now, as parents we can never go to a 21st birthday party and we can never welcome his wife or children. You think about all of these things and you just realise it’s just such a senseless act of violence and how we have so much violence. It’s just meaningless.”
“We’re just living a terrible, terrible dream and are hoping we’re going to come out of it. You see people in this position and you just never think it will happen to you.”
“In the end Thomas was brain dead, so we had no choice but to turn off his life support system. Which – for any family – is terribly, terribly difficult.”
“We also decided between the four of us left – his brother, his sister, Kathy and myself – to donate his organs. We feel proud and know that Thomas would have wanted that as well. And if we can save a life – or lives – then he’s done an incredibly brave thing. Hopefully one day when we’re walking down the street we may get a tingle that the person walking past us is someone that Thomas has saved.”
“It’s just crucified the whole family. We just don’t know how to go forward. You know, Tom should be here right now having dinner with us and he’s not here. We just don’t know how we’re going to survive… how we’re going to live through this.”
Someone out there knows something. Police believe the bloke they’re looking for has done this before. He’s a coward that gets his kicks from attacking complete strangers. He’s described as Caucasian, in his mid to late 20s, 170cm tall, with a strong build and brown hair. If you know something, anything, please call Crime Stoppers right now on 1800 333 000.
Thomas Kelly should be sitting at work right now… showing off his talents, thinking about his study, Facebooking his mates about the fun on Saturday night, chatting to his family and enjoying the buzz of being in love.
One punch ruined all of that.
Now, I don’t have kids yet but I already fear the debate when they want to go out and I want them to stay at home. How do you stop an 18 year old from going out with their mates?
Ben Fordham hosts 3pm-6pm on 2GB radio and works for the Today Show. You can listen to the full interview between Ben Fordham and Ralph Kelly here.
Comments
110 Comments so far
So happy to hear someone has been charged with Thomas’ murder. I hope this brings a bit of comfort to the Kelly family.
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I live in the area and this is just shocking. It has made me very frightened to walk my dog at nights through the area – i hope they catch this maniac and hang him!
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This story just makes me tear up. Being a young 21 yr old, I sometimes go to the Cross. I can’t believe someone would commit such a cowardly disgusting attack on an innocent person, with no provacation! I hope this person is caught and locked up.
RIP Tom, and thankyou for donating your organs
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I am so terrified for when my kids start going out (they are only 6, 4 and 2). I know it’s a phase that most kids/young adults go through, going out on fri and sat nights amongst people who have been dinking/taking drugs, and in all likelihood drinking/taking drugs themselves. But I know it will worry me terribly each and every time they choose to do it. I know things like what happened to Thomas are rare occurances, but putting yourself in that environment puts you in danger. Stay at home and play scrabble kids, for your poor parents’ sake. All my sympathies to Tom’s family, I can’t imagine your pain.
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speechless………………words cannot be enough to express our deepest sympathies to this family………just know that those bastards that did that to him will get their Karma!!!
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There are no words. Please God keep our children safe.
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This hits home for me especially hard because Thomas was a friend of my son’s best friend. And my son wonders why I worry when they head into town (aka Kings Cross) for a night out? My heart goes out to Thomas’s family.
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God this breaks my heart.
Thinking of Thomas’ family and friends. I really hope someone who knows something (and there HAS to be someone) comes forward with some information.
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My sympathy goes out to Thomas’ family and friends. Now is when you sure want to believe in heaven and that he is there to party on and wait for family and friends. R.I.P. Thomas. He and his family have supported so many others with organ donations.
May you find peace when they get his violent killer off the streets.
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very sad, however an 18 year-old is not a boy.
He’s a young person/ man. But not a boy. And I bet he would have told you that too.
But very, very sad.
Your headlines are terrible.
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I’m sure he will always be his parents little boy though…I know my son will be, even when he’s 40 years old, married with children.
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I’m sure he will. This story is very sad.
But readers of this site are smart enough to know that 18 is too young to die, without the author infantising him further.
Definitely off topic, but the media treats young people like adults or kids when it suits them to sensationalize things further. And our young people often act like kids way beyond what they should (witness the adulescent or the Kiddult). Clearly not relevant to this young man, though…
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So very very sad and senseless. Condolences to the Kelly family and such a wonderful gift young Thomas has given to save the lives of others.
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I think as a country we need to make the punishment for this kind of violence, fighting and anti-social behaviour far more severe. It’s not right that we need to feel frightened about this sort of thing happening to our loved ones or ourselves. I feel so sorry for this boy and his family. What a senseless thing to happen. My thoughts are with them today.
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I watched the report on this last night on the 7:30 report and could not help but cry.
So tragic. The family has such amazing strength. I hope this drives some change, this sort of thing just should not happen in our supposedly civilised society.
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This is beyond sad and the amount of violence that is so common place in our society today is truly horrendous.
That being said, my husband is English and he is rather perplexed at the amount of people who seem to die over here from being King hit and yes some of them, like Thomas were blindsided and didn’t see the hit coming but most did.
It’s a sad state of affairs, when suggesting everyone perhaps brush up on their defensive skills but there is a real chance we all may need to if this growing violent culture continues.
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I can’t even express the sorrow I felt reading this. Just reading it and knowing that this was someone who worked hard and had such direction only to die in such a meaningless way. I truly hope that horrible coward is caught he didn’t just kill one person he also broke the hearts of so many people who are now affected by this tragedy
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This is heart breaking & my biggest fear whilst raising boys. I live in a bubble trying hard to give my beautiful boys a magical childhood, but deep inside I feel so frightened when I hear stories like this. I read the Steve Biddulph book ‘Raising Boys’ which was so interesting. Boys can get into so much danger/trouble in this age group & since reading it I am so much more aware of tragic stories involving young men. I am nervous to be a mum of late teen boys & know I’ll be fearful everytine they go out. I am so sad at where our society is right now. So much drinking, violence & anger on our city streets, in bars & clubs. I can’t bear it, especially now I’m a mum. I really struggle with the whole binge drinking concept, abusing your body & getting out of control all in the name of fun. Its a scary works out there & I just hope things change by the time my precious little boys are 18.
My heartfelt condolences go out to Tom’s family. I can’t imagine how they must be feeling – losing a child would be the most unbearable pain & I hope the low life animal who hit him is caught & bought to justice. It disgusts & saddens me that this happens in our society & I wish I never had to leave my magical bubble I get to live in right now with toddler boys.
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My thoughts go out to this beautiful family. I am so sorry for your unimaginable loss. I don’t know how you keep going from here but I hope you find it. It is so hard to understand how this could happen to such an upstanding young man and I really hope they find whoever did this.
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World is a poorer place without Thomas. We have lost a wonderful kid who had his whole life ahead of him. Instead we have the cold blooded killer roaming the streets leaving the family to wonder why.
To the Kelly family, I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful son and brother. As a mother of 3 boys, I cry with your family.
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Milly, well said. I’ve heard from dozens of mum’s who have shared the exact same feelings. It’s a tragedy. Thomas should be here.
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I cannot fathom why someone would randomly king hit an unknown person with zero provocation. What a tragic waste of a young life, not to mention the lifetime of grief for Thomas’ family and friends. WTF is the world coming to?
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MrsT… I wish I knew the answer. But it needs to be fixed. We can’t let this happen again.
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This young man’s life is such a terrible loss and one can only feel the deepest sympathy and respect for Thomas’s family, parents and young siblings and their brave and dignified response. I just saw their story on ABC’s 7:30 and was deeply touched. As a victim of a random serious assault myself, this chills me to the core and deeply saddens me. This random violence is such a senseless social pathology.
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Adam, you’re right. It just doesn’t make any sense mate. Let’s just hope they can find the bloke responsible. Cheers, BF.
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I don’t really understand how the girlfriend or her friend didnt see the guy well enough to at least get a face fit out of it or something. I really really hope the guy gets caught. It makes me sick knowing he could be out there now smirking to his friends about this. The only answer to stop this is harsher penalties. I’m not talking counselling and rehabilitation but years and years in jail till he’s old and gray.
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It makes you want to wrap your kids up in cotton wool and never let them out of your sight.
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This is an absolute tradgedy, I feel for the family immensly!
I am 19 years old and am in Kings Cross most saturday nights having a blast, and I can tell you I have never seen anything like this happen before.
Despite what the media portrays it as, its actually a very safe place. Police everywhere, and many people who know how to do the right thing (despite probobly having too much to drink!)
This is a complete freak accident, and I hope the person who did this is found so they can be brought to some justice. This should never have happened.
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It’s not a freak accident that someone lurched out and punched him for no reason
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This wasn’t a freak accident – this was a deliberate act by someone who while they may not of intended to kill did intend to harm an innocent person for no reason.
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This was FAR from a freak accident. He was deliberately punched, and one punch can kill. It’s a simple as that.
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Chill out! Jeez all i ment was wrong place wrong time kinda thing. Not a big deal….
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If it’s such a safe place why do the Police need to be everywhere? The scum of Sydney hang out at Kings Cross as well as young people looking for a good time! And WHY do they have to drink so much to have a good time?
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Not cool. A young man has just died . His family will be reading these comments. Thomas was having a good time , and hadn’t drunk excessively.
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My heart aches for a life cut short way too soon by a senseless act of violence. Life is so precious people xx
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Well said Jo. Thanks for reading, you’re right – it was a completely senseless act of violence. I will never understand why someone would do it.
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You deserved better Thomas.
Heartfelt condolences to his family and sincere thanks for the selfless gift of organ donation after this senseless tragedy.
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You will live through this and most of the time you won’t want to. Take each moment as it comes. The pain and disbelief is unbearable and beyond now is too overwhelming. Love to you all xxxxx
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I have a terrible ache in my chest now for this poor family … and for poor Thomas.
Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?
May Ralph, Kathy and the rest of Tom’s beautiful family find the strength and peace to carry on … I just can’t imagine how they must feel.
xxx
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Tragic. Every parents’ worst nightmare. I was just discussing with my husband last night – we have two kids under five – how this stage of our lives is quite physically demanding, but it is probably nothing compared to the emotional challenges of grown up kids and letting them go out there into the big wide world. My heart goes out to this beautiful young man’s poor family xx
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A family member of mine was punched once and received catastrophic brain damage when out in the city celebrating his 20th birthday. He now lives in a 24 hour care facility and can’t walk or talk, feed himself, go to the bathroom and can barely move.
His mates set up Step Back Think to try to put an end to street violence by educating people and spreading the message that one punch can end lives.
I urge you all to watch and share the videos.
http://www.stepbackthink.org/
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T, thanks for the link – I’ll make sure I check it out. It sounds like a tough battle for everyone in your family. Stay strong.
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When I saw this yesterday I cried for this boy, his friends and family.
I cannot imagine the hell this family will go through now. Added to that there wasn’t a reason behind it (not that its better to have a reason) this family can’t even protest or fight a certain cause because you can’t change thuggery.
Im so disgusted and saddened this happened to one of our young Australians and it strikes fear into me that something like this could happen to my 21 year old brother it his friends.
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Too sad. No words.
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Well this story has had me in tears.
Ben, I just wanted to say that you handled this story with great sensitivity … it’s a hard one to write. I love seeing your stories on here — keep them coming.
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Thanks Rebecca, fingers crossed the family gets answers.
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Its hard to imagine the pain that Thomas’s family are going through. Not to ever see their boy alive again. I hope the police find this maniac quickly before he harms someone else.He is someone’s son, father or brother. How can he live with himself?
I remember my son on a night out in Kings Cross one night years ago and someone king hit him for no reason. Luckily he was ok. Some people have no value for human life.
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Wow. I’m stunned by the level of violence that tends to dominate society in these modern times.
I’m in my late 30′s, and can reflect back to when life was so much simpler. In my heyday (18…19…) going out clubbing till all hours.
Nothing like this ever happened, and no-one ever worried about random violence…not once… never…
Sincerely hope they find the thug that is responsible.
My heart and many blessings, go out to the Kelly family, and to all those who will be mourning the loss of Thomas…
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I’m with you here. I remember my brother wanted to go a ‘gentleman’s club’ for his 18th birthday. Off we went and had a good time. The Cross was a sort of right of passage for us teens back then in the early 90s. We stuck to the main strip and looked around amazed at this world. Not once did we ever fear anything happening to us like this. It is a real shame that a family has lost a son and brother to an act that I find impossible to describe in polite terms. What is also a shame that is has forever tarnished what has been a teen ‘right of passage’ for many generations.
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Hearing stories like this make me so sad and feel so angry. I have 2 brothers, a 21 and a 24 yr old. They are both great boys. Happy and hardworking and respectful. A few weeks ago I woke to an early morning phone call from my 21 yr old brother. He was in hospital after being punched in the face. For stepping in to defend his mate. A gang of 5 took on my brother and his friend as they walked to catch a cab in Brisbane city. I shudder to think of what would have happened if he landed differently on the sidewalk after he was hit. One punch really is all it takes to ruin lives. I have seen my fair share of street violence from living in country QLD for the last 12 years. Gangs of hopeless and idiotic boys go out looking for trouble and hoping to inflict as much damage as possible. They will fight with anyone. Male or female. Big or small. Young or old. They get this aweful crazy look in their eyes and you fear for your life. They have no reason for starting fights but simply have this ‘need’ to. I have the deepest of sympathies for Thomas’ family and only hope that justice will be served and the offender harshly punished.
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Beyond disgusting. I feel so much for Tom’s family, girlfriend & friends. This kinda shit is one of the reasons I rarely go out late at night. Some of the behaviour is apalling.
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I am so sorry to hear about this story, and my heart just absolutely goes out to Thomas and his grieving friends and family.
WHAT could/would make another person so rageful and full of hate that they could do this to another?
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The senseless violence in our community is appalling. My 17 year old daughter was attacked from behind at a party. She was hit with a bottle(intact, luckily) punched and kicked in the head. This was done by another girl who had been bullying my daughter for 18 months. I’m still struggling with the fact that this girl got away with nothing more than a warning from police. These people need to be charged and punished, I believe this girl will do this again. My heart goes out to this family and others who have lost loved ones.
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Wow powerful story this one. Makes me sad and also very upset at what is happening with our children in today’s society.
Vicki, can totally relate to your daughter being attacked. My son was recently attacked at a family friendly fireworks night at the local school fundraiser. Plenty of parents about, my husband and i also in attendance, but this young boy still managed to find my son, who was hiding from the said boy, in one of the classrooms as he had been tormented by him towards the end of the eve (8pm), and hit him in the stomach once and then squarely in the face twice. This boy had also been bullying him at school also, (unfortunately unawares to us). We were totally shocked at this, as was my son, who instead of retaliating came to us crying and very upset. Have i mentioned both my son and the boy that hit him are 12 and that there were also 3 parents in the classroom when my son was hit?!! They all thought it was ok, “as kids need to toughen up and it really wasn’t that bad”. All this said in front of the boy that assaulted my son. So the message to him was – ITS OK TO HIT OTHERS! It’s absurd, and i find it ridiculous that this boy will now grow up – with no punishment re his actions on that night – thinking that this type of behaviour is acceptable. And then we wonder why and how things get so out of control as they get older.
To the family that lost their son my heart absolutely aches. My deepest and heartfelt sympathies to you all.
To the coward that hit him, I wonder what messages he received from adults as he was growing up.
I think it is time police were able to do more than give mere “warnings” and we as a society had more of a voice and that the coward that did this faced up to his punishment.
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You have expressed exactly how I feel these situations are happening. As young people are receiving no consequences or punishment for their violent actions when young and continue on a path that can lead to dire situations and further violence as they grow older. Also the victims are left with a sense of injustice and no faith in our police and law because they don’t feel at all supported. It seems the thugs and criminals of this day and age have more rights thn the victims.
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Why didn’t you press assault charges against this girl?
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Sienna, I asked police that same question many times. Long saga really but I am still disappointed with their reasons (being a minor, not being in trouble before etc) Beyond me how someone can do so much damage to another person and get away with it.
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Oh Ben, that made me cry. My 18 year old took himself off to Egypt (he’s now an archaeologist) and nearly died in a dirty little clinic in Alexandria after a ruptured appendix. Thanks to a wonderful on call surgeon & a pharmaceutical company owner, he was rescued from a corrupt clinic administrator & returned to us, sick still & suffering PTSD but he was alive. You can’t stop them from their adventures but surely we can stop people like this from doing the same to someone else. My heart goes out to this family. We came so close to losing our boy/man & the questions you keep tormenting yourself with…
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Devastating. That poor family.
It’s incredible that people still think it’s cool to display violence. I hope to God that person is caught and convicted, and does not get off with a slap on the wrist. This is murder.
On a slightly more possible note, well done to the family for donating their son’s organs and speaking about it – they are making life better for others even in the face of their grief.
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I have 3 sons and a daughter…and a brother with an Acquired Brain Injury..Since my brother’s injury I have met too many people, men and women, who have had their lives completely altered and severely diminished by attacks like this one….it would be easy to succumb to paranoia and not want my kids to go anywhere when we see these things, especially the eternal grief that threatens to dampen even the most joyous occassion…years after the event…to his parents and all the people who loved Thomas Kelly….I wish you love and a peaceful mind….sometimes surviving a hit like that?……….. This is a life ended…not a life destroyed…I take comfort in that..
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I can’t even imagine the pain this poor, poor family is going through. Having kids is like having your heart walk around outside your body…no one is ever going to cherish it and be as gentle with it as you. My deepest condolences to Tom’s family.
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I’ve been The Cross once, I only went to one club and to be honest if I went their again I’d only want to go to that club again.
I’m from Newcastle and, as almost everyone knows, our night life can get just as violent as The Cross. I have one friend who was assaulted whilst we were out. Like Tom’s attack it was a random act of violence. My friend was minding his own business INSIDE a pub and was attacked from behind, luckily, only suffering a broken leg. But it could have been worse. I know how dangerous it is to go out and it is such a shame that every time we go out we know that there is the possibility of getting hurt and it is almost certain we’ll see a fight.
It my birthday on Saturday and I’ll be going clubbing with some friends but this story will be stuck in the back of my mind. It’s just heart breaking.
Sending love and good thoughts to Tom’s family. This should never have happened. Xx
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This story breaks my heart and I count my blessings everyday that I am not living this story.
My boyfriend was king hit by a guy from out of nowhere, no warning and was in hospiatl in an induced coma and fractured skull. It was the most horrible experience of my life.
Everytime I hear a story like this I feel physically ill for the family who has to go through this.
You can’t stop your kids from going out. For the bad wrap it gets, I actually feel safer in the Cross than I do in other places because of the high volume of people and the high police presence.
Thugs are thugs and are going to be everywhere (including outside a local RSL where my boyfriend was hit – could have been an old man who was in his place). They are the people we need to stop from going out, not the majority who are friendly and want to have a good time.
My thoughts are with Thomas’ family x
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I read about this last night, so so tragic. BUT this has nothing to do with his parents letting him go out… Could have been a 30 year old in his place, just casually walking down the street – wrong time, wrong place.
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I feel sick for Thomas’s poor parents. Such a senseless act. A boy is dead because some dickhead full of testosterone (and presumably either alcohol or drugs or both) decided to show off and hit him. A young man on the brink of adulthood, his whole life and the world in front of him, all ended with a single punch.
It’s at times like this that I’m glad I don’t have children. Much as I would have loved to have been a mother, I’ll never have to worry about someone hurting my child.
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Broke my heart hearing about this tragedy. My 11 year old asked me what my greatest fear was the other day.. My answer .. Losing one of my kids. Deepest condolences to Thomas’ family and I really hope one day you meet the organ recipients to maybe bring you a little peace in your hearts.
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Angie, what a big question from your 11 year old. Sounds like a smart kid. I think that’s most parents fear – losing anyone you love is a scary thought. And losing someone without any notice, and for no reason, is gut wrenching.
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This story has broken my heart. I live in the inner city area and I am the one who walks our dog at night at the weekend as I’m too worried my partner is a target for this random violence. Times sure have changed, right?
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My Grandson went to school with Tom. I remember sitting in the hall at graduation looking at all the fine young men up on stage with their whole lives ahead of them. I was so envious of the lives they were to discover, opening up before them was a world of possibilities, to now have that taken away from Tom before he even got a chance to taste it, to discover it, is more than a tragedy.
Parents should not outlive their children.My heart breaks for Tom and his family.
Please everyone learn something from this.
It does not matter how you gave birth, if you bottle-feed or breast feed your children. If you are a stay at home parent or you go to an office each day.
the only important thing is to love those that are in your life, cherish the time you have together,don’t waste your energy on anger or things you can’t control.
Hug your kids extra hard tonight, teach them how to be the best person they can be and then……
Let them go out into the world. They have to learn to fly on their own and you have to trust that life already has plans for them, you have no control.
It may not always go the way you expect, and it can all end tomorrow so live your best today.
take care everyone.
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That is so beautifully put Jackson!
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Jackson thank you for that beautiful post.
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Oh Ben. His parents should not have stopped him going out, that is not the point at all. It was simply awful fate for Thomas to be in the wrong spot at precisely the wrong moment. It wasn’t because he “went out”, any more than someone who gets hit by a drunk driver crossing the road at 10am shouldn’t have “gone out”. Thomas could have walked 100 more times in Kings Cross and been safe. The tragedy is that at this moment, he wasn’t.
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