Tony Abbott with wife Margie and daughters
By MARGIE ABBOTT
During Tony’s 18 years as a member of Parliament, I have never sought to enter the political fray or to publicly comment on issues. As the girls were growing up, Tony and I worked hard to keep politics out of our home.
Tony and I made a decision that we would do everything we could to insulate the girls from the rough and tumble of political life. It was only at the last election, with the girls old enough to make their own decisions, we decided as a family to get involved and get out and campaign with Tony.
We wanted to get involved because we are very proud of Tony and we know firsthand, the type of man he is really is. Tony has always supported me in everything I have done from working at different times while the children were growing up, going back to study as a mature student and then working as a director of a community child care centre.
Margie and Tony Abbott with one of their daughters.
As a father, he has always been the softest touch and has a gentle manner that has not changed as our girls have grown up. He is, in my life and theirs, the most optimistic person you could meet.
Obstacles are simply seen as challenges to overcome. Sometimes that optimism has seen him undertake some home renovations and projects that I wish he had left to others, but that optimism has been a steadfast quality in my life and in the lives of our girls.
In recent weeks, it has become clear to me and the girls that there is a very deliberate campaign underway trying to raise doubts about Tony and his relationship with women. As the woman who knows him best and who has lived with Tony Abbott for over 24 years, I know these distortions are not true and have decided to speak up in response to these personal and groundless attacks.
Tony gets women. He is surrounded by strong women. Tony grew up with three sisters, he has three daughters, he is supported by a female Deputy in Julie Bishop and he has always had a female chief of staff.
Our three daughters, Bridget, Louise and Frances are living the life that feminists aspire for every young woman. Bridget is studying radiology, Frances is studying design and Louise is now living and working in Europe.
Our girls are educated, confident, grounded and happy young women making their own way in the world – and the love and support of their father has played a big part in that. They in their own way have influenced their father’s thinking.
Tony was the first political leader of a major political party to put the case for a paid parental leave scheme – and not a paid parental leave scheme based on a minimum wage, but a paid parental leave scheme based on a replacement wage.
Tony gets these issues because we face the challenges most families face. We’ve raised three children, been paying off a mortgage, battled traffic, juggled work and family, and have always tried to give something back to the family, friends and community that have given us so much. He understands the pressures and joys families face, because we face them as a couple, and as a family, every day.
The people who run the negative arguments about Tony do women a disservice to suggest that somehow because a man has the cauliflower ears of a rugby player, continues to compete in sport and spends a fair number of weekends volunteering as a firefighter or lifesaver, that somehow it is all proof that he is a boofy bloke who is anti-women.
If Tony was anti-women why did he cycle 1,000kms this year raising $150,000 for the local women’s refuge raising much needed funds for a facility protecting women at risk? That same ride also raised over $500,000 for Carers Australia.
Tony does get women, he just doesn’t get bad policy and a bad government. He was a minister for nine years, so he can debate issues on their merits. It is issues that face families every day and the challenges facing our country that should be debated and not untrue, personal attacks.
I’m not a politician and I enjoy a private life, but I won’t stand by and let others claim that the man I love and the father my children adore, has some agenda against women – Bridget, Louise, Frances and I know it’s not true.
Margie Abbott is a mother, community child care operator and wife of the Leader of the Opposition, the Hon Tony Abbott MP. This article was first published by News Limited here and has been republished with full permission.
Has there been a campaign to undermine Tony Abbott’s credibility with women voters? Do you think that Tony Abbott is popular with women voters? Does Margie’s writing change your view of Tony Abbott?
Comments
165 Comments so far
Tony’s announcement in today’s paper stating that he won’t be putting more money into children’s education tells me that he doesn’t get women with children. As a mother with two primary school kids, investment in education is a major priority and this seems to be the norm with all the mothers I have spoken to about education. This shows he doesn’t get women but also doesn’t understand the issues in education. I really don’t want to vote labour but I won’t be supporting a government that doesn’t put education investment as a priority
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It’s not that he has an agenda against women – it’s that he has an outdated, old fashioned view of their place in society.
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I understand that Tony Abbott may not have a ‘problem’ with his wife, his mother or his daughters or female co-workers or friends. That does not mean that he is not sexist or a misogynist. It does not mean that he isn’t aggressive and uses language that is both derogatory and sexist towards the Prime Minister and her cabinet. I believe that he holds oppressive beliefs about women and their rights to their own body, definitely in regards to abortion law within Australia. The reason people believe he is misogynistic is because he is or at least appears to be in Parliament and his public life/duties.
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I can’t believe I am about to reference Sam De Brito (I like lots of his articles and can’t stand lots of his articles!), but Sam wrote something in the last couple of weeks that finally nailed how I felt about Tony Abbott. I have not been able to really put my finger on it before that.
Sam basically said that he had even enjoyed a drink with Tony and that he was a pretty good bloke. I would agree with this, as I have heard plenty about the good things that he has done outside of parliament, and I actually think that in an era of photo ops and sound bytes he doesn’t make a big fuss of what he does for the community. Either his PR people are really good at what they do, or he is genuinely not putting out there that side, and I like that. I hate the whole ‘kissing babies’ insincerity that many politicians do.
That said, there seems to be something that just CHANGES in Tony Abbott when he goes to work. And it is THIS Tony (who is unfortunately the one that I believe would be running the country if he gets in to power) that I really don’t like. Here is where I will quote Sam de Brito “it’s just when he steps into the world of people who live or work in Canberra, his desire to rule vulgarly consumes his desire to serve.This is not a good look for politicians – vicious ambition must be gloved, whereas Abbott seems to understand no method other than bare knuckle and bared teeth.”
This is the reason that I can’t see myself ever voting for Tony Abbott. If we could really get the guy that his lovely wife (and his daughters) are in love with, then we wouldn’t be too badly off, but I just don’t believe that he is the same guy as Abbott the politician. I also don’t think this is something that he could ever change, if life has not changed that in him by now. So his family should continue to enjoy the man they see, but I really hope we are never so unlucky as to have the other ugly Abbott as the PM!
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As a 32yo female, I don’t feel Tony is sexist at all. He should think before he speaks at times, but I strongly believe he and the Liberals have my back (and my young family’s) more than Labor ever will.
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I am a 41 year old married mother of 4 and I have always liked Tony Abbott. I think he comes across as sincere and capable.
I am sick and tired of Labor and Green politicians using every media interview or sound bite that they can to state that Mr Abbott is a misogynist, yet never actually providing any evidence to back up those statements. He has a long and consistent history of promoting women to powerful positions (Office Manager, Chief Of Staff, Deputy Leader). He has undisputed positive relationships with his wife, daughters and sisters. He raises money for female causes. I’m not seeing too much there to indicate he is a woman hater!
As far as the four quotes brought up as so called evidence of his sexism (see Amelia’s post), I don’t actually have any problem with them – his views on abortion are no more extreme than Bill Clinton’s or Kristina Keneally’s; Women and men do have physiological differences which mean that women probably never will dominate or even have equal representation to men in the Defence Forces (this is what that comment is referring to); And seriously what is the big deal about the ironing comment? It is consistently shown in surveys that in most Australian households it is the women that are doing most of the house work (including the ironing).
I admire Margie Abbott for taking action to set the record straight regarding the man she knows and loves and I think her recent public statements have been eloquent and warm – is this any different from the support Michelle Obama provides her husband?
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I love this comment.
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Oops! This was supposed to reference Wendy’s comment further down.
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of course tony abbott likes downton abbey those days men ruled.
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‘I think it would be folly to expect that women will ever dominate or even approach equal representation in a large number of areas simply because their aptitudes, abilities and interests are different for physiological reasons’
It sounds a little different when it’s personal..
‘I think it would be folly to expect that Bridget, Louise and Frances will ever dominate…simply because their aptitudes, abilities and interests are different for physiological reasons’
I do not doubt that Tony Abbott loves all the women in his life and wants the best for them, but he makes a lot of unfortunate generalisations. I think Tony Abbott very obviously cares for people as a whole, but this doesn’t stop him from making some assumptions about people of difference sometimes, I don’t think that means he doesn’t care.
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Surely the point is not that her husband does not have a problem with women, rather it is that he IS perceived to have a problem with women. This perception stems from his actions and his comments and his way of dealing with women in the past.
Just because he is an amazing husband and father tells us how he is and how he behaves in the security of his home and family. We all know that we behave differently in different settings. That is life.
The only person who can change the perception women have about Tony Abbot is Tony Abbot, not his wife!
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Apparently Mrs Abbott’s ‘media’ blitz’ did not include appearing on the ABC – surely she is not as frightened of Lee Sayles or Emma Alberici as her husband seems to be. [See examples of his refusals on this week's Hamster Wheel].
Also while the ALP is certainly on to the fact that women voters do not like Abbott and his views and attitudes, women more generally are actually active in campaigning against him – we do not need and are not lead by the ALP. Rather I suspect the ALP is piggybacking on a more general community attitude – see for example the Victorian Women’s Trust’s publication A Switch in Time which promotes civility and rationality in discourse on a range of issues. It documents -among other things – some of the many instances of misogynist discourse by the Liberal and National parties – and others – in recent months.
As David Marr has pointed out in his recent essay, while Mr Abbott may have oodles of ‘charm’ and have values which support ‘the average working person’, his ‘political’ self has always won out in any contest as far as his actual practice is concerned. In short while Mr Abbott may well be lovely to his family he is a vicious head-kicker in political life. Do we want him as our leader or does AUSTRALIA NEED AN ABBOTT-PROOF FENCE?
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I get very annoyed when other women presume to speak for me and know what I think. It’s arrogance in the extreme. In my circle of female friends and family from varied backgrounds and professions there certainly isn’t a general consensus that Tony Abbott is sexist and absolutely no one regards him as misogynmous. I am embarrassed that prominent women think its amusing to mock Abbot in his budgie smugglers and yet they would be the first to proclaim sexism if Abbott commented on a females personal appearance. That is sexism and yet because its not against women it is somehow okay. I also believe in women being equal to man and to that end I found the Nicola Roxan debate comment about bullshit fine. I think it’s offensive if men speak to me in a milder fashion because I’m female. I appauld Abbott for his parental leave scheme and I’m astounded that Labor attacks him on that. I think in years to come it will be considered the norm as is holiday and sick pay today. I don’t think it will be the strain on business the negative commentators tell us, simply because many decent businesses already value their female employees enough to be doing that already. Instead of ranting and raving about Abbotts problem with women lets talk policy. Lets hear some straight talking interviews with Abbott about his abortion comments and the other policy issues people have brought up. I for one am fed up with the daily demonisation of Abbott by ministers speaking fom the same notes- if that is all they’ve got, its dismal Finally good on Margie – I’d love to see that woman in a parliament – a mixture of decency, strength and decorum.
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It was great of Margie Abbott to speak about her life & the personal side of Tony Abbott. But I already liked him anyway. Bring on the elections!
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It was his tirades in parliament when he was Health Minister in Howard’s government that put me on the path of immensely disliking what Tony Abbott stands for, specifically things he said about abortion and the prevention of the RU486 contraceptive from being allowed into Australia. His extremely conservative views caused me to be outraged and nothing he has done since then has convinced me otherwise.
He might treat all the women in his life with love and respect, but I cant in good conscience vote for this man.
I dont want to vote for the Labor party either.
I am thinking of not voting at all, I am so disillusioned.
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Dude, he’s anti-abortion and refused to let his daughters get vaccinated for cervical cancer lest they have premarital intercourse without due punishment from the Lord. That’s some heavy duty misogyny right there, whether or not his wife says so.
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… and yet he had pre-marital sex as a 19 year old and thought he got his girl-friend pregnant… and then didn’t marry her and keep the baby!
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Long term reader first time commentator. Tony Abbott’s policies speak for themselves, against abortion, against RU48. A ridiculously expensive paid parental leave ..which even his own party think is unsaistanailbe. He might be fine on domestic front, but it is his POLICIES that he will be judged on, and so far not female friendly at all. Think about this: why is is the parties that want less deregulation always want MORE control of female bodies?
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Margie says Tony is the most optimistic person you could meet. Yet, he has been waging the most negative campaign you could imagine, constantly talking down the economy and making Australians feel like our situation is only marginally better than that of Greece and heading that way at a hundred miles an hour. If he is an optimist, I would hate to meet a pessimist.
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I applaud you Margie for standing up for your husband. But my vote is based on the party as a whole and the policies they will bring to the table. I think politics has become too much about personality of a single individual rather than pragmatic policies that will help the future of this country and its people. To me, in the last election both the LNP and the ALP campaigns lacked any real substance and was more a sledge match. Perhaps something for Tony to think about when he and his party start planning his campaign.
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NO, Margie’s writing does not change my view of Tony Abbott one bit, of course she isn’t going to say anything negative about him anyway.
I will be voting for Labor, as always.
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Just curious. How can you already know who you are going to vote for before all policies have been announced?
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I’d say because she votes based on the philosophies of the parties.
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That’s it Faybian, I always vote labor and have done for 24 years. A few policies here and there don’t outweigh the core beliefs of the liberal party.
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As mentioned below about Tony Abbott and how he views women in power, a commentator in SMH stated that Tony doesn’t have problems with women, But he has problems with women who thwarts his ambition.
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I may be persuaded to vote for her
But really if he gets women why does he offend so many of us when he speaks. Does he simply have poor communication skills?
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I write this without having read a single comment below.
and I say THANK YOU to Margie. Your article doens’t change my mind, but only because I know what you say is true, because for those of us who are prepared to open our eyes, it is very apparent that Tony has great values, that he understands women.
I don’t know why this has become the hate campaign that it has, but I’m so pleased that you have so eloquently written to the women, and men, in our country to show them who the ‘real’ tony abbott is.
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It’s not the media that affects my view of Tony, it’s Tony himself.
Sometimes people just don’t… click (?).. obviously I don’t know Tony but as the possible future PM of this country I need more from him.
I have no doubt he is a wonderful father and husband but there is no place for for that here- he is not my father or husband but a possible future leader of this nation. Margie can blame the media all she wants (even though she must still have enough trust in the media to publish an article like this!) and I can empathise that it must be difficult to be in her position but it’s not personal that some people don’t like her husband it’s business.
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I’m the same way with Gillard but my non-clicking is based more on what I’ve found out about her character than anything else.
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The quality of political debate is poor on both sides. There is too much play the man not the policies. No one is more victim than any other. They all need to lift their game.
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I have to say I really like Margie Abbott.
But for me to change my vote (and my vote is up for grabs, quite frankly) I need Tony Abbott to do a more in depth interview about some of his past statements about women.
Leigh Sales, we need you!
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Bec,
before you ask for an in depth interview about his comments re women, I suggest you dig out the entire interviews from which the sound bite sized comments come from. I think you’ll find that his entire statements are completely different to his edited comments.
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My respectful reply to Kate was cut. I’ll try again.
Kate, I think your comment that he is can’t deal with women unless they are dependant on him is disrespectful to Mrs Abbott and totally untrue. How do you know she is dependant on him? You’re implying that she is submissive and weak.
I’d point out that her speech today indicated the opposite. Abbott is also surrounded by female staff.
Any man with a wife, three feisty daughters and an estrogen frenzied workplace will know who is in charge and it’s not him.
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this is a big risk for Margie Abbott and I fear it will backfire.
I think politician’s families should stay out of the media and public commentary on their husband/wife/father/sister/brother etc. It must be very difficult to have to stand by and take it though.
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I think it’s past time she called the media on it. Gerard Henderson did the same when they tried to label Abbott as a wall abuser. He tore strips off the ABC and David Marr and confirmed what most people know – there has been an unrelenting campaign against him that is based in spite and bigotry.
The Anglicans and Athiests can’t stand the thought of a Catholic in the Lodge. They had to bite their tongues with Keating because he was Labor but they’ve given their prejudice free rein with Abbott.
Put their hate aside and look at the situation – Abbott is no more going to hang women for premarital sex, outlaw abortion and prohibit the education of girls than Gillard is going to legislate against marriage, forbid women to have babies and make it law that you have to be In a defacto relationship with your hairdresser.
The smear campaign is based on hate, not on fact.
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Its got nothing to do with the fact hes a Catholic…
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No. Just hate.
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I’m sorry, but that is such a ridiculous generalisation. I believe the issue that many people have with him in terms of religion stems from the fact that we have a separation of the State from religion in this country and Abbott seems to have problems separating himself and his policies from the more conservative side of Catholicism.
I am not in any of the groups you have labelled and I dislike him as an option for PM. Not because of the media or these groups, but because of the words I have heard come out of his own mouth. I have been following him and his words for longer than many because he was my local member for a long time and I can assure you that there was no “smear campaign” then. I simply did my research, and listened to what he said, and watched how he voted on things.
I don’t need to put aside “hate” because I don’t have any. Just because you don’t want to vote for someone, it doesn’t meant that you hate them.
Of course he is not going to start lynching women, that is ridiculous. However, rights are hard-won and very easily eroded and encroached upon and it is more that gradual erosion that I believe we as women need to be vigilent against. I will not approve of a politician who is against or anti some of those rights, now or ever. If women don’t protect those rights, who will?
At the end of the day, you can’t just stick everyone who dislikes Abbott as a possible PM into one camp and label them, that’s not how it works.
Oh and, just for the record, I’m not a Gillard-fan either. I am don’t feel that either party represents what I want for my country.
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Hearing something positive from Tony Abbott would do more to change my opinion that an article written by his wife. I feel like all I hear from him is how terrible the current government is, rather than what he would do to make a change if he was in power.
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We’re paying 20 million dollars a day in interest on our 250 billion dollar debt after the biggest mining boom in a generation. Wayne’s ‘balanced budget’ is already 20 billion in the red with 9 months to go. Over 4 billion dollars has been wasted on the Nauru fiasco, Labor have promised another 120 billion dollars in vote begging policies that can’t be funded, the carbon tax hasn’t hit yet, they’ve promised 7 billion dollars of it to the UN to line the pockets of despots and fat cats and Kevin Rudd’s seat on the UN Security Council has cost us 3 billion dollars and proven a windfall for lowlifes.
Couple their fiscal vandalism with union corruption and I’m struggling to find the silver lining too.
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I disagree, if the Howard Government spent money on health , education etc, there would not be the need for the Labor Party to spend the money catching up, as for the Nauru Fiasco that would not have happened if the liberal party would support onshore processing.
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They spent years paying back Hawke and Keating’s 98 billion dollar deficit. Haven’t you worked out the cycle? Labor spend us into penury then the grown ups have to come in and fix up the mess.
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i don’t think tony abbott is anit- women. how can he be when he is advocating the most generous paid maternity scheme? a lot of women don’t like him because of the abortion issue but abbott will never advocate criminalising abortion – he is on the record as saying that. his wish is that women will be offered counselling and services to help them make the best choice…regardless of what that choice is. that can only be a good thing as so many women feel alone in this period and a lot of women regret having an abortion and suffer a huge amount of grief after it ( read the book ‘giving sorrow words’ by melinda tankard reist). abbott is actually pro women. i would rather someone who stood for something than someone who has consistently backflipped on issues such as gillard ie. asylum seekers/ climate change.
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“Tony gets women”. As someone said, catchy. But it’s not true. There are two different worlds here – the one Tony Abbott’s wife and daughters are in, and the one we, the women of Australia are in – it’s called “the real world”. And no, he just doesn’t get it – not by a long shot. As far as him being optimistic! Well that would equate with “positive” and that’s one of his biggest failings – he is negative about everything. When spouses with a public profile go on the defense and speak out about their partners and family life it always rings alarm bells with me. It’s like celebrities who go to great lengths to convince the public that their marriages have never been better and then a couple of months later the marriage goes belly up. It’s great that he is such a good husband and father and the family is a loving one but he is big enough and mature enough to speak out for himself and frankly, if the women in his family have had such an enormous influence on him, we wouldn’t be having this conversation Mrs Abbott. And to answer the questions “Has there been a campaign to undermine Tony Abbott’s credibility with women voters? Do you think that Tony Abbott is popular with women voters? Does Margie’s writing change your view of Tony Abbott?” If you are alluding to a campaign by the Labor Party to underline his credibility with women voters that’s insulting. We don’t need anyone pointing out his inability to connect – it’s there for all of us to see and the women of Australia are making up their own minds. To answer the other two questions – No and No. In fact I would go as far as to say it’s probably done his public perception more harm than good. So to try to be fair I just now watched that interview on the Today program. When nothing changes, nothing changes.
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I disagree. I’d suspected that the media was having a lend of us and Margie Abbott’s heartfelt speech confirmed it. I now see clearly that he is nothing like the way the media portray him and this swinging voter will be backing him all the way!
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‘Tony gets women’ was said firmly tongue in cheek
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I’m sure he does look after the women he loves. But I don’t believe he’ll look out for my interests so I won’t be voting for him.
“The problem with the Australian practice of abortion is that an objectively grave matter has been reduced to a question of the mother’s convenience”
Tony Abbott
“We have a bizarre double standard; a bizarre double standard in this country where some-one who kills a pregnant woman’s baby is guilty of murder, but a woman who aborts an unborn baby is simply exercising choice”
Tony Abbott
“I think it would be folly to expect that women will ever dominate or even approach equal representation in a large number of areas simply because their aptitudes, ABILITIES and interests are different for physiological reasons”
Tony Abbott
“What the housewives of Australia need to understand as they do the ironing is that if they get it done commercially it’s going to go up in price and their own power bills when they switch the iron on are going to go up, every year…”
Tony Abbott
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Brilliant Amelia!
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Unless you live in Tony Abbott’s electorate, you can’t vote for him anyway.
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Can you tell us when these quotes are from?
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“We have a bizarre double standard; a bizarre double standard in this country where some-one who kills a pregnant woman’s baby is guilty of murder, but a woman who aborts an unborn baby is simply exercising choice”
Tony Abbott
Sorry, but I absolutely agree that it is a double standard, because by definition it is the application of different sets of principles for similar situations.
IT doesn’t matter which side you lean pro choice or prolife, either a baby is a living human at a given length of gestation or it is not.
I am more than open for someone to point out to me why this is not a double standard. Either you kill a human being or a clump of cells but you can’t say one person killed a human and the other killed a cellular melange .
There’s no logic in that.
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If you use that argument then every woman who has an IUCD inserted is breaking the law. It isnt that clear cut at all
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How bushpiglet?
I am respectfully wondering how a preventative contraception can be relevant here? It doesn’t destroy embryos/babies by anyone’s decree.
It is clear cut. Either a given age is a baby or it’s not. You can’t have two separate rules for the exact same entity.
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An IUCD doesnt prevent conception, it prevents the products of conception from implanting on the uterine wall. Conception has already taken place so to use the above logic then an IUCD is killing an unborn baby too. The statement about a bizarre double standard is justs emotive rhetoric which shows very little understanding about womens reproductive issues. Ditto the whole RU486 debacle.
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All the usual tactics.
Whether it be the case or not, how on earth does any of that change what I said about it being a double standard?
Either it’s a fetus or it isn’t, but it can’t be both.
If not why not?
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What do you call the morning after pill then?
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Well said fhb.this isn’t an opinion but a simple statement of fact. It doesn’t equate to either a pro choice or pro life position. Just an honest statement that the two stances are a contradiction.
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There’s certainly logic if you believe a foetus changes from a “cellular melange” to a baby at a certain point in the pregnancy? And you will only go through with an abortion before that point?
Or even it is a baby the entire time, do you really believe a mother, as the giver of life, as the one who has to go through the pregnancy and deal with every consequence of it, shouldn’t have more choice over what’s happening in her body than a murderer?
It is your argument that is illogical.
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Carly – I did not say anything about the mother’s right to choose. NOTHING.
Simply my point is, if a 5 week old fetus is a human life then anyone who kills it is a murderer – If it is not a human life, then anyone one who kills it is not a murderer.
But it can’t be both. I’m not saying anything else, or any other words people would assume for me.
I’m not saying a person assaulting a women who is five weeks pregnant isn’t completely responsible. I’m not saying women shouldn’t have the right to choose.
All I’m saying is that the majority of feminist opinion I hear is that a young fetus is not a baby, therefor abortion is completely moral.
If this is to be true then, if someone assaults a pregnant women who only has a young fetus, how on earth could that be murder, if by their OWN definition it’s NOT.
I’m not saying it’s not assault.
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Losing a pregnancy at five weeks is a miscarriage for whatever reason it happened. The embryo isnt a fetus until around 12 weeks gestation. Until that time a pregnancy pretty much is a cellular melange whether you like it or not. Its the reason why abortion is reccomended before 12 weeks is reached. It is nothing like deliberately killling an unborn BABY who has reached the age of viability. Abortion isnt a decision that women take lightly and unfortunately it is always a woman who will have to live with the consequences whatever decision she makes. Be it an unwanted pregnancy from rape, from incest, from failure of contraception. Its never a man that has to deal with the outcomes of that decision is it?
I have real concerns that a Liberal government will outlaw abortion, restrict the availability of contraceptive education for minors and make me do the ironing. They may not, but they arent giving me a good impression right now.
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Well, a man has no choices. The female may make the choice to take a morning after pill, abort and he does have to live with it either way, it’s incredibly insulting to say a man feels nothing and has no responsibility.
If a woman aborts his child – He gets no say and has to live with it.
If a woman keeps the child and he doesn’t want it – He gets no say and is responsible and has to live with it.
If he tries to point to this being unfair, he is told he should have abstained, but this same argument is never pointed at the female of the species when she wants and abortion, welfare, child support, even though she had many more choices.
Again it’s a one sided dialogue and I’m not going to convince you or anyone else here, but all I do know is men live with the women’s decision and have no choice which is completely interesting.
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Love it! Let them be the catchphrases of the next election.
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I certainly don’t think Tony Abbott is a misogynist, I do think he’s sexist in the way a lot of men his age are (and for the record I feel a lot of women of that generation are also quite sexist towards men).
Look, how someone behaves towards their family members, co-workers and friends isn’t a good barometer of how they see the world. My father is extremely supportive of my mother and I, but he makes all sorts of sexist judgements about women he doesn’t know. My mother adores my Indian boyfriend but will rant about Indian taxi drivers all day long if you let her. I work in a very multi-cultural office and everyone gets along great, but I recently overheard a co-worker say we should nuke the entire Middle East to wipe out all the ‘dirty’ Muslims. This woman works closely with and is friendly with a number of Muslims colleagues.
I don’t care if Tony Abbott is a good husband or father, it has no bearing on his ability to do a good job as PM.
What scares me about Tony Abbott is that when it comes to certain issues I believe he will always put his personal morals ahead of what the public actually wants, and that’s not what I want in a Prime Minister.
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So true. Just because an individual has loving and equitable relationships with family, friends and colleagues that are women, gay or come form refugee backgrounds, doesn’t mean that as a politician they will legislate for those groups fairly and without prejudice. I think that the true courage of a politician is seen when they can rise beyond the limitation of their own, immediate experiences (and even belief systems!) and think outside the square. We need politicians that are visionary, positive and solution-focused.
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…And don’t make policies based on THEIR religious beliefs.
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“I think that the true courage of a politician is seen when they can rise beyond the limitation of their own, immediate experiences (and even belief systems!) and think outside the square. We need politicians that are visionary, positive and solution-focused.”
I love this! Where can we find it?
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Doesnt Julia Gillard say that she is making the difficult decisions that she believes are right for Australia based on her opinion. She wasnt voted in based on her opinions on the carbon tax or asylum seekers as the policies she presented at the election are the polar opposite of what she has ended up doing. So we already have a PM who is putting her personal morals ahead of what the public want.
If the roles were reversed and Julia was the opposition dont you think she would be incredibly negative and attack what the Government was doing? That is the role of the opposition, to provide critique on the Government and make sure that the public is being represented fairly.
When we vote, we vote on policy and ability not on personality or looks. The politic of hate and attacking has become so ugly and common place (from both sides) but the leader of the Country sets the tone.
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Last time I looked Australia wasnt a dictatorship.Thats why we have a parliment. Julia isnt doing this all on her own. In fact all this bahooey about the “carbon tax” made me do a bit of research and it really is the most misquoted line ever. There will be no carbon tax in a government I lead, but I am determined to PRICE CARBON. Its kind of ironic considering that its on record that Tony Abbott promised a price on carbon to the Independents if he could form government.The goverment hasd been trying to pass legislation about asylum seekers since acheiving office and have been stonewalled by the LNP at every turn because it is such an emotive issue and a fantastic chance to attack the government. I’m more than happy to listen to LNP solutions to issues but I havent heard any, all I hear is about how badly the government is doing, how horrible the PM is, bladee bladee blah. As ye sow so shall ye reap.
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I have never gotten the impression that Tony Abbot was against women. If Julia Gillard was a man, he would address her the same way in the public forum, its politics after all, no one is nice to each other!
In saying that though, what really gets to me is the fact that so many people vote based on the leader of the party rather than what the party stands for. The PM gets a large say in things, but there are also a lot of people that have to approve of their decision. The party has to decide.
Its like a ceo of a company, they have a board they have to report to that help make the decisions with them, if the board doesnt agree, then it doesnt go ahead.
So instead of worrying about if Tony Abbott wears buggie smugglers, or Julia Gillard wearing white jackets, worry about what each party stands for and vote for that!
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A nice fluffy piece of writing about a woman who loves her husband and kids. Otherwise, irrelevant in the political arena. Carries as much weight with me as Germaine Greers comments on the size of Julia Gillard’s backside.
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The difference in the way he and Gillard view abortion is simple.
He believes that abortion should be safe, legal and rare. That is, he’s not going to tell us that it’s a big fat nothing that we shouldn’t think seriously about before we do it. He has no intention whatsoever of limiting access or making it a criminal offense. In fact, he will never mention it and it will carry on exactly as is. There is no way on earth he is going to have women dying at the hands of backyard abortionists, for heavens sake!
Julia is a founding member of Emily’s List, the organisation that is behind the TA hate agenda and Chinese whispers about how dangerous he is. Emily’s List endorse any Labor woman who signs a pledge to push for ‘to term abortions.’ They need no other talent than that. Sign a piece of paper and they insist the ALP give you pre-selection.
Abortions to term is a step too far for me and I wager a guess it is too far for most of us. It’s one thing the be ‘progressive’ and militant about women’s rights, it’s another altogether to terminate and refuse medical intervention to otherwise viable babies.
Now, as a woman who has stared straight in the face of abortion at either end of her reproductive life, once at the age of 42 and 22 weeks pregnant, as a woman who believes the decision another woman makes is none of my businesses as long as she isn’t being pressured into it, as the mother of three daughters and a dozen nieces, I am 100% convinced that the vilification of Tony Abbott has been scandalous and vile and it must stop.
Emily’s List is backed by large numbers of our feminist celebrities and journos. They have waged an unrelenting, undercover campaign and manipulated us into thinking he’s a monster when he is simply a very decent, ordinary man who shares the same values as most of us.
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I’m sorry but I can’t possibly believe that about Emily’s List
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http://www.emilyslist.org.au/images/stories/pdf/Annual_Reports/2011_annual_report.pdf
Look at page 15. ‘Distribute ‘ Women can’t trust Tony’ and ‘Torpedo the Speedo’ leaflets.
This is only one example of dozens. Read their website and have a look. Google Emily’s List. They make no secret of their abortion to term agenda.
The moderators probably won’t print my comment if I name another blog but they are nothing more than a mouthpiece for EL. The owners and their writers are all EL and they are as transparent as glass.
To MM’s credit, they have published Mrs Abbott’s letter in its entirety and have been fair and balanced in their presentation. The other website has shown a spitefullness that will leave you in little doubt about their agenda.
I might add that I don’t know TA or his family and voted Labor until I laid eyes on Rudd. Over the last five years I have read everything I can to workout just who the ALP are and I won’t vote for them again until they and their unions have been subjected to a Royal Commission.
The way the media has manipulated women into hating a perfectly good man terrifies me. It’s time we woke up to what they are doing and I applaud Mrs Abbott for finally calling them on it.
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I’m glad someone has mentioned this vile organisation (is that what it is?).
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that’s absolutely not true about Emily’s list.
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It absolutely is.
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I thought it was good to hear from Mrs Abbott today – she strikes me as an intelligent, articulate woman who loves her family & husband very much. I’ve also had the opportunity to briefly meeting Tony Abbott on a couple of occasions before he was Opposition Leader and found him to be funny and very courteous. He was doing something very worthwhile for his community at the time – which I really admired.
But here’s my big BUT.
These private impressions of him seem hugely out of step with his policies, the way he conducts himself in parliament & the media and his overall leadership. Will the REAL Tony Abbott please stand up?
He has been leading an endlessly negative campaign to scare and mislead Australians over issues such as Asylum seekers and the carbon tax and he has encouraged this whole “JULIAR” rubbish. As Tony Windsor alluded to in parliament recently, I think Tony Abbott would have had to make a lot of concessions just like the ALP did when the Australian public effectively delivered a hung parliament. He came very close to also getting in bed with the independents & greens to form a government and I wonder if he would have been able to be so sanctimonious then?
Again, I believe that Mr Abbott is a good man, with lots to offer. But heavily scripted lip service from his family saying what a great guy he is isn’t enough for me. I’m a self-confessed undecided (aka disillusioned) voter, and if I’m going to support him as our next PM I need to see these admirable qualities reflected in his policies AND his public/parliamentary behaviour.
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I do not want Julia Gillard as Prime Minister.
However, I would like Tony Abbott to be a leader, a spokesperson spearheading a push for better politics-related behaviour by both men and women in our country.
We have become ‘the Nasty Nation’ with too many Australians
expressing vicious attitudes easily fanned by their own appalling language and the hate-filled attitudes of others.
I, along with a lot of vacillating voters, would be greatly impressed if you take a stand, Tony. Demonstrate your respect for women and your basic decency.
Rather than accepting ( and valuing the benefits of the Nasty Nation) I would urge you to take up the challenge of speaking out strongly against the ugliness of the bile that has persisted in dialogue related to the Prime Minister – ‘witch’, ‘bitch’ ‘cow’ ‘Juliar’, she / her and the chaff bag lines.
Instead of being angry but decent people, we have too many among us
now who have become vile, ugly Australians.
How do you feel about this, Tony? In supporting you, how do your wife and girls feel about the ugliness that now characterizes so many anti-Gillard statements?
Is this the Australia you want for your daughters? Our boys? Do we want generations of Aussie boys and girls growing up and absorbing the current approach to political ‘debate’(not)
Do you want too many of our men ( and lots of women) to continue with language and behaviours that we know are now par for the course? Raffling a chaff bag coat . . .
You could be a hero here, Tony.
We need a strong male leader saying:-
“This has gone too far. It’s eroding the basic decency
that we like to say characterizes Australians.
What comes out of our mouths has a lot to do with that;
look at the ugliness that’s becoming part of us . . .
Who better than Tony Abbott to take a stand and be the leader in this arena?
His would be a powerful statement.
Please, Mrs Abbott, since you believe that your husband respects women, including powerful women . . . even our PM . . .
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I think it’s great that you gave the opposition leaders wife a forum to talk about her husband to an audience of female voters. That’s terrific. I truly find Michelle Obama inspiring and interesting to talk to, but what she talks about is her husband’s policy’s – that that ‘Hey I like him and so do his daughters, so this proves he doesn’t have a problem with women!’. Ummm… no it doesn’t.
I am an avid political spectator and the debate in this country has been on a downward spiral for years – and frankly Tony Abbot is one of the key causes for that. He only has one position – attack. And he has always been that way, which as a front bench/opposition Minister can be useful. You need the snarly dog behind you sometimes. But it’s not what anyone aspires to have in a leader. Prime Ministers need to be able to get above the fray and be inspiring, talk about all the things that are great about this country and what we can achieve. Not trying to use any means possible to denigrate the existing Government. I mean, hello, Australia pretty much operates on a swing vote. So if you’re out there constantly criticizing the current government you’re basically calling 50% of the country morons for having voted for them.
I don’t think it’s that women ‘don’t’ like Abbot. Especially anymore then they ‘don’t’ like Gillard. People are tired of the constant negative rhetoric that fills parliament house. They want positive change and bipartisanship, they want their government to get on and do their jobs and work together with the opposition/business/health care systems/private sector etc to achieve the best outcomes. Abbot has shown again and and again that he is not willing to do this – so why chase being a Prime Minister? Go and be a CEO.
I just feel like this article is so 50 years ago – ‘Because I’m a woman and I have daughters and I tell you my husband is a lovely man, you should believe me.’
Dear lord… have we not evolved beyond that? Margie, please – tell me why I should vote for your husband based on his policies and track record? Not because he did a bike ride for charity. Which by the way, that’s great and well done – but I wonder if he put out a media release or his advisors alerted the media of his participation. Something tells me that he might have…
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Sounds to me as if Tony Abbott has nothing but the utmost respect for women. Which is quite a good thing, I’d say.
There are those who subscribe to the theory that if you say something often enough about another person, others will join the throng an accept the mantra. Hence, this is why “Tony Abbott has a problem with women” has become a big part of the ALP manifesto.
It has to be a part of the manifesto. I hear the comment almost every time a microphone is placed in front of anyone from the government’s front bench.
Yes, Abbott has some old fashioned ideas. Looking at the way society is behaving, old fashioned ideas seem an appealing alternative.
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“Yes, Abbott has some old fashioned ideas. Looking at the way society is behaving, old fashioned ideas seem an appealing alternative.”
What about old fashioned is better? The discrimination? The blatant racism? The higher levels of crime? The higher levels of family violence?
The ‘good old days’ always look better in hindsight than they actually were.
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Margie Abbott is obviously an accomplished, intelligent and articulate woman who has done what any loving and supportive spouse would do when faced with a continual barrage of what could almost be construed as sexism in reverse. She has every right to not only be offended for what borders on a caricature of her husband and his personality but also personally offended by the casting of such aspersions and how it reflects on the women in Tony Abbott’s life – his wife, daughters, sisters, colleagues, etc. The media has much to answer for in constantly lowering the debate to little more than ‘personality politics’.
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I have a few massive issues with this whole ‘femowashing’ attempt
1. Tony has deliberately gone out to be the most aggressive opposition leader this country has ever seen – when questioned about his relentless negativity he’s stated that it’s his job as opposition leader to oppose. Fair enough, but you have to be able to take what you dish out.
2. Women dislike Tony because of his actions – the whole RU 486 debacle, the happily posing in front of the Ditch the Witch placards, the cosying up to Alan Jones, the comments about what the housewives of Australia think about whilst doing the ironing, the hope that his daughters keep themselves pure for their future husbands etc etc etc
3. Julia has taken a lot of flak, some deserved, much undeserved and much of it hysterical. And she’s put up with it all with such dignity. I would love to see the reaction if Tim Mathieson (sp?) wrote a 4 page article in a major newspaper asking the bullies to back off his poor little wife??
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I vaguely recall a front page article – not as eloquently put as Margie’s – by Tim Mathison, about love, proposals and life with Julia Gillard. Maybe he should try and give us another…..hopefully with a little more substance.
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The reason I have a problem with tony Abbott has very
Ittle to do with whether I think he gets women. I think he and the lobs in general come across as very conservative and religious. They seem to be very negative. The though of a front bench including Christopher Pyne, joe hockey and barnaby Joyce scares the living daylights out of me. For me it’s the whole package. While I’m not a big fan of gillard I think her front bench are far more intelligent and ompetant.
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OMG, I could not disagree with you more!!
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Barnaby Joyce doesn’t scare you even a little?
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Why should he? Because the ABC snickers at him, so you just go along with the cool kds? Try reading his website and make up your own mind.
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I don’t go along with any cool kids and rather base my opinions of him on what I hear him say, mostly in relation to what he has to say about the Murray River in particular. Living in SA this is a very important issue and many of his comments are some what concerning.
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I’m not sure why my request that anonymous needn’t be rude to me was cut but his/her comment about ‘going long with the cool kids wasn’t . I thought it was a reasonable request
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I don’t know about how he treats women. But I do think he has bad policies. Anti-environment. Anti-refugee. Anti-equity.
So I won’t be voting for him!
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How is he anti-environment, anti-refugee and anti-equality?
He’s certainly not anti refugee. He stopped them being shipped to Malaysia and has said hell increase numbers. It the fact that the open border policy of GreenLabor has cost 4 billion dollars and a thousand lives that he objects to.
The other two, you can explain.
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But he was more than happy to send them back to Indonesia though!
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Interesting letter. Im gladmargie has spoken out. It is good to hear from her.
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I don’t feel like there has been a campaign against Tony Abbott regarding women, and I don’t particularly feel like he has anything against women either. I do agree with comments below that he comes across as a bit old fashioned. I feel like most of the time, he just argues for the sake of arguing. I realise as opposition leader, that is his role to a degree, but not when it is having a detrimental effect on the country. It seems like time wasting to me, and time is (our) money after all.
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‘He is, in my life and theirs, the most optimistic person you could meet.’ That may be the case.
The problem is that he has not translated this positive energy into his politics. I am exhausted by his negativity and inability to offer up alternative credible options.
While he could be a good politician and guy underneath I have simply had enough. I want someone with good statesmanship and ethics leading our country, not just a constantly negative person.
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There is a good person and statesman available – his name is Malcolm Turnball – the type of person who is happy to disagree with his party when the issue is important (ala climate change)
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Malcolm was rolled as leader by Tony (or knifed if you use the word they use against Julia). Even if his party has him back in order to get into the office, they still won’t let him have his way. The Liberals are much more conservation that Malcolm. It’s pointless wishing. He can’t be the Prime Minister you want him to be from the Liberal benches.
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I think, as so often, this issue is being totally over-simplified. Is Tony Abbott ‘anti-women’? As a husband and father and friend/relative/colleague, I imagine not. However, Tony Abbott has been on the wrong side of a certain group of women for a long time now in his political and social beliefs – for example, in his handling of the abortion pill debate. Personally I will never vote for him due to his involvement of Right to Life in that debate – and I know others feel similarly (and that others do not). The problem he therefore has with ‘women’ is not really about whether we perceive him to be ‘anti’ us or not… more that some of us don’t like some of his views and that’s important to us – regardless of whether he could ever put these views into practice or not.
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He halted the morning after pill because a woman had died. He fast tracked HIV medication from the US and got it here ASAP. When Paul Keating said – two men and a dog do not a family make – he gave an empassioned and wonderful speech on the equality of gay relationships.
I think Margie’s letter should make you realise that the media has a very definite agenda towards him and they have been running it for years. Don’t believe a word they say about him without first researching it yourself.
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I’m sorry but it’s not the media who invited Right to Life to participate in a debate on whether a particular drug was appropriate for Australia.
Right to Life are anti-abortionists. Anyone who involves them in discussion on methods of abortion is very clearly persuing a particular personal agenda.
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please can we not say that the media are anti-tony!
with a 70% owned murdoch right wing media this is simply not the case.
as someone said below, if you say something often enough people start to believe. he has had a bad run since that appalling interview he did with leigh sales. other than that he has had a dream run!!
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My take is that Tony Abbot is a decent, hardworking man and a terrific husband and father. I’ve always said I reckon if you were seated next to him at a wedding you’d have a great evening – he’s intelligent, articulate and I believe (through people who’ve met and worked with him) great company. But I agree with the commenter below who wrote, he only appears to ‘get’ women who are dependent on him. I think my dad is much the same – he’s never liked or admired a woman in powerful positions – Hilary Clinton, Condaleeza Rice, Julia Gillard, Margaret Thatcher. His attitude doesn’t make my father a bad person, but he’s not a feminist and not someone I’d vote for – if he ever ran for office – aaaaargh
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I think you’re on to something here Kate. My dad is a bit similar to Tony Abbott in that he has three daughters, is a wonderful, loving husband and father and supports our careers and endeavours unconditionally. But he also doesn’t like strong women or women in positions of power. Go figure! Having said that he is slowly coming around to the idea of Julia Gillard as our prime minister and thinks she is a good leader…
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Sounds like my dad too! My sister and I took my Dad’s slightly bigoted, chauvinistic opinions with a grain of salt as we grew up…and we are strong independent assertive women ( who love him to death). Wouldn’t want him to be Primeminister though!
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Absolutely spot on. I feel I recognise Tony Abbott’s personality easily as the same as my own fathers. Two of my sisters came to the same conclusion so it’s obviously something that does resonate.
I don’t blame my father for his attitude, that’s the way things were back then. And he has been an amazing provider, giving us a top education and encouraging us in all our adventures. However much as I like my Dad, I wouldn’t want him running the country.
There is definately a time and place for people like my father and Tony Abbott and that time and place is not the PM of Australia in any year past 1980.
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Okay, I’m going out on a limb here but I really like Tony Abbott.
I like that he is a sport guy and that he fits his “hobby” into his busy life and I think he makes a great role model for everyone by being so active.
I like that he sticks strong to his opinions. I don’t necessarily agree with all of them but I do know where he stands on issues.
I like that he is a family man with daughters that he loves.
I like that he is religious. Although I am not I respect him for believing in his faith and following through with his belief.
I do think he is pretty negative in his attacks against the government but he is the opposition leader and it is his job to be negative against the government. it is the job of any opposition leader to be negative about the government.
Would I be happy with him being our next PM – Yes!
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I don’t mind him either. For sure, I don’t agree with everything that he says or does.
But I don’t agree with everything that some of my closest friends say or do. I don’t agree with every utterance or action my beloved wife makes.
Anyone who claims to agree 100% with someone, 100% of the time is a sychophant.
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Agree, Bradley and I don’t expect to agree with every discussion. All I ask is that our government puts the interests of the Nation front and centre, not the corrupt unions and their own delusions of grandeur and world domination. Yes, Kevin, I’m talking to you.
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If every man who had sisters, a wife, daughters, female co-workers ipso facto didn’t have a problem with women – then misogyny wouldn’t exist.
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I’m not a misogynist. However, there are certainly some women who I despise. That isn’t because they simply happen to be women, but because they are genuinely nasty, spiteful, just plain mean individuals. Actually, there are some males in my life who I despise for the same reason.
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I’m not a misogynist or a manogynist (!) either but I despise a lot of women and a lot of men.
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My politics are fairly left leaning, but I have never really felt that Tony Abbott has a deliberate agenda against or a problem with women. Some of his views are old fashioned and conservative, which is why I don’t vote for the LNP in the first place. His position on women’s reproductive choices concern me but that comes from his moral/religious beliefs, not, I think, from a lack of respect or concern for women. And as for the suggestion that his position on marriage equality makes him homophobic, I think this is something that he struggles with as well and if I were to call him homophobic because of that (as someone below has done) then I would have to say the same about our PM.
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