.
I don’t want to do this. I’ve been willing myself to get out of the car for half an hour now, but the thought of what might happen next makes me feel sick. They’re home, the car is in the driveway.
Deep breaths. I grab my notepad and start making my way up the long driveway, past the neat garden to the front door…
I hate death knocks. I reckon most journalists do. It has to be the very worst part of the job. There is nothing enjoyable about knocking on someone’s front door looking for a story, knowing a family is being tortured by grief on the other side. It is bloody awful. Even if you do get the story, you always feel lousy afterwards. When emotions are so raw – even if they are strangers – it’s hard not to take a piece of their pain away with you.
I’ve probably done a few dozen death knocks during my TV career and there will probably be many more. This summer just gone has been particularly busy: beach drownings, shark attacks, holiday road smashes, domestic disputes turned deadly.
That’s a lot of doors to knock on. It doesn’t get easier; every family, every tragedy is different. And so are the responses to an interview request.
I’ve been physically threatened. Screamed at. Spat on. I’ve had doors slammed in my face, been pelted with beer bottles and rotten food. Our crew car’s been damaged. But you just have to wear it. Grief does strange things to people. If I’d had a loved one torn away from me, I’m not sure how I would react to a reporter knocking on my door.
Vultures! Heartless hacks! I can see you mouthing the words now. We journalists should be ashamed of ourselves! Well I’m not. It’s my job. And a big part of it is helping people tell their story. It frustrates me when people accuse journos of preying on grieving families for “ratings”. If anything, raw heartbreak can be a turn off for viewers. It’s too confronting, too uncomfortable to watch. I’m embarrassed to admit reporters sometimes overstep the line: harassing families, breaking into homes, stealing photographs of dead loved ones. That’s disgusting behaviour. Most of us just knock, politely ask the question and if the answer is no, leave.
My close friend and colleague, Dimity Clancey is Nine’s police reporter. She’s hugely talented and driven and is knocking on grieving strangers’ doors most mornings. She knows what it’s like to be on the other side of that door. “I was 14 when my sister and her husband were killed by a drunk driver on the way home from Carols in the Domain. A Daily Telegraph reporter came to our door a couple of hours after the police had told us my sister was dead.”
In a way, Dimity says, that moment steered her towards a career in journalism. “Dad was a bit shocked the media knew where we lived, but the reporter was very respectful. Obviously she was there to do a job, but she was compassionate. And when I have to make those awful house calls, I remember that. And people really do open up.”
Surprisingly many families actually do want to share their story; some say the process is even cathartic. Over cups of tea, I’ve listened to a father’s plea for drivers to slow down, after his son was killed in a hooning accident. On assignment in Samoa in 2010, I spent time with a young village girl, who lost eight members of her family in the tsunami. She’d put her own grief aside to volunteer at the understaffed hospital. She was 14. She wanted family to be proud of her, she told me.
Stories like these keep journalists knocking on strangers’ doors.
I can hear footsteps coming down the hallway as I wait at the big brick home’s front door. Inside, a family is grieving the death of a daughter, a sister, who was mauled by bull sharks while on a school excursion the day before. Not just a horrific story, it’s now this family’s excruciating reality. A middle- aged man answers the door, his eyes red and puffy. ‘I am so sorry to do this to you at such an awful time..’ I begin, but he cuts me off mid-sentence with a sad shake of his head. ‘No interviews’. He’s polite, but very firm.
I am not the first journo to knock on his door this morning.
A teenage girl appears in the doorway, she’s crying. ‘Dad I want to say something,’ I hold my breath, prepared to be screamed at. Who can blame her? ‘Can you please put in your story that she was the world’s best big sister?’ She’s sobbing now, I’m close to losing it too. Here comes that sick feeling… ‘Come on sweetheart,’ the man says to his daughter gently closing the front door. I got my quote, but as I walk back to the car I still feel lousy.
What do you think of the way the media handles grief?
Sarah Harris has been a journalist for more than a decade. She currently works as a reporter for the Nine Network and can be found on National Nine News. You can follow her on Twitter here.
Comments
295 Comments so far
It’s be one thing if families are only bothered (respectfully) once but of course that’s not how it happens due to all the competing media. So I don’t care how nice you are about it, you *should* feel bad about doing these death knocks.
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I agree with readers who have commented that these ‘death knocks’ are wrong. I think they are completely insensitive and equally unnecessary. However I also believe that sadly, in todays world this is part of a journalists job and refusing to do them would almost certainly put them out of a job.
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Hi Steph,
Bang. You’re on the money.
Every job has grubby parts, and in journalism this is probably the worst.
If I had to do death knocks everyday, I’d be working somewhere else by now.
Sarah
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I can’t think of many jobs that do something similar to this.
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This might be part of your job Sarah and I understand you feel that you need to do them because it is part of your job. I just think that the industry and your bosses are so very wrong for expecting that you do this. I don’t think that it is appropriate and certainly not needed. Journalists are simply not trusted these days especially after the News of the World Scandal in the UK. I think it is a very sad part of our society that these types of things are in the media. And let’s be honest – it really is done for ratings – if it wasn’t done for ratings then the media wouldn’t do it because they wouldn’t make any money. Please don’t sugar-coat it to yourself or others. You sound like you are very aware of how awful it is to do this to people and you don’t like doing it – you are forced to because of your job and if your want to stick with your job you need to do this – such a pity that the powers that be in the media still want you and other journalists to do this to people so they can make money. Perhaps you should spend some time on the beat with police or in an emergency department seeing how those peoplereally must deal with difficult circumstances – and then perhaps you might be able to stand up to your bosses rather than knocking on the door of a grieving family to get a story that most of us would rather not see.
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Beware, I’m taking a bit of a devil’s advocate approach to many of the comments here.
So often people who are upset or angry abuse the front line staff – sales assistants, nurses, journalists doing death knocks etc… Please correct me if I’m wrong, but unless they are freelance, if journalists want to keep their jobs, they need to do the job as asked. Sure, there are ways around doing a death knock when it doesn’t feel right (eg no answer at the door, a coffee run instead) but if a young journalist always has an excuse, their boss would catch on pretty quickly. I don’t know many (if any) people who would put their job on the line every single time they are asked to do something which makes them uncomfortable.
Maybe our distaste should be directed up the chain a bit – tell it to the people who can make systemic changes (news directors, editors etc).
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I’m not exactly surprised by the tone of the reactions to this story but would be really interested in Sarah’s response and whether she anticipated such a reaction to her piece. For what it’s worth I think she is quite a competent journalist.
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This is a really brave article to write. I imagine most journalists loathe this part of the job and I like to think they are as respectful as possible.
However, as a journo, you don’t get to talk about how much death knocks upset you even though they are ‘necessary’. You just don’t. You don’t get to talk about it because these people are devastated over the loss of someone they love and you have chosen a career that dictates you may be asked to approach them while their grief is still fresh. If it sickens you that much, don’t do it. I predict the trashiest of the nightly news will not lose ratings if you cannot provide a quote from the deceased’s family and friends.
I also do not buy the ‘in the public’s interest’ argument. I know how dangerous drugs are without having to see parents on the news crying over the death of their 16-year-old. I think you will also find that the parent’s target audience (teens who do drugs that they are trying to warn) are unlikely to be consuming the news. Leave a note and if they want to speak to you they will. It is never acceptable to knock on their door.
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This just about sums it up for me.
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that has got to be the most ridiculous criticism i’ve read.
Do police officers and firefighters get to talk about how hard it is to see victims of crime? Tell families their relatives have perished? Do doctors get to talk about how hard it is to tell a family their loved one is going to die? Of course they do.
But judging by your rationale, they shouldn’t. They should just suck it up because it’s all part of the job they signed up for.
Do you really think network news heads are sending their journos to do ‘death knocks’ for the fun of it?
You’re incredibly naive to think that the ‘human interest’ element of tragedy isn’t crucial to the way we respond to it. Communities share grief by empathsing with victims through the ‘who’ and ‘why’, not by hearing about the cold, vague, “what”, “where” and “when”.
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I think she was making the point that we can sympathise when people in these other jobs need to talk about it, because they are doing a necessary, valuable, but heartbreaking service to society. In contrast to death knock journalism, which the commenter believes is none of these things, (except for the heartbreaklng bit). That’s the way I read it, anyway.
Your points about how communities share grief are interesting and made me think. I still think though, that while this might be true, this ‘need’ for community grief shouldn’t be at the expense of the needs of the victim’s family.
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Firstly, those people have to do it. It is necessary for their job. It is not necessary for a journalist and that is exactly the point I was making. Secondly, your need to share in community grief does not trump that of a family directly linked to the grief. Again, as I said, if a family wants to contact the media then they will. Leave a note.
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Why was my comment deleted? Don’t think I said anything more offensive than anyone else???
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I think our comment guidelines sum it up best – We have zero tolerance for any abuse of our writers.
Of course you are welcome to disagree with what she does and even how she does it – but imagine you are sitting next to Sarah at a dinner party and saying it to her face. Keep it respectful.
Thanks
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Lana, I don’t think anything I said was that offensive.
I said she doesn’t deserve sympathy, and her job is distasteful – a sentiment which most of the comments seem to agree with.
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Hi Anonymous,
Not sure what you wrote earlier, but I never asked for your sympathy. My piece was simply a perspective that readers can choose to take on board. Or not.
Sarah Harris
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Like others have said, I thought this would be about police doing death knocks. I still remember clearly about 7 years ago my then room mate getting home from work looking like crap – pale, quiet, vague. I asked how his shift was and he said “I just had to tell a family that their 21 year old daughter was killed in a car crash” and he broke down in tears in front of me.
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Have a listen to this http://soundcloud.com/alice-blain/behind-the-journalists
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Nice work Alice!
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My first experience of death knocks was from the police side as a work experience student. I had been planning to study journalism, but was working in media liaison. A small boy had been killed in a hit and run accident. A press conference had been scheduled, but the journalist decided to go early and speak to the family. As a result they had footage of the mother wearing blood stained clothes, and got home video footage of the boy.
I understood that the journalist was just trying to do his job, but I found it sneaky and underhanded, like he had taken advantage of their grief. I knew at that point that I couldn’t be a journalist, especially if that would be the type of behaviour expected of me.
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I find this absolutely appalling! When I see a journalist foisting a microphone in the face of grieving family members, usually under that wonderful banner of “the public’s interest” or ” right to know”, at a time when that family member is heartbroken and may not have the presence of mind or mental strength to turn the journalist (and I use the term loosely) away….my blood boils.
And the inane questions asked of the griefstricken! “How are you feeling?” “How will you manage without your husband/wife/daughter/son etc?” What, the press can’t work any of that out themselves?
Even if, as you say, the family may want to get their story out, I am sure that once the initial massive shock wears off a little, they are capable of contacting a reporter of their choice, to whom they can talk. Perhaps leave a card and a short note in their letterbox?
Then again, why wait for that when you can just barge up to their front door, catch them off-guard, and hopefully get some tears on film for the 6o’clock news?
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Suze,
With due respect, I never knock on a grieving family’s door with a camera over my shoulder and a mic in my hand. I gently ask them in person, while the crew sits in the car..usually around the corner.
Sarah
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Well, I did mean to refer to media in general, not just you Sarah, but credit to you and your team/creww for remaining as unobtrusive as possible. Having said that, the reporters knocking on the door of the bereaved still appall me. Yes, you “have to do it”, but you also chose to be a journo.
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I thought this article would be by a police officer, by someone who actually has to do a death knock. I can’t see where the ‘need to know’ is in these situations. I’m sorry, but you don’t need to do it, and we don’t need to read about or see people’s raw grief immediately after a tragedy.
This whole story is so upsetting.
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Hi Frankie,
My piece was in no way trying to compare what journos do to the brilliant and brave work police/ambos/firies/nurses and doctors do.
There’s no comparison.
Just wanted to share my perspective. Everyone has one. That’s what makes the world such an interesting place.
Sarah Harris
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Hmmmm, yes, ‘interesting’, that is a polite way of putting it.
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I think its disgusting and the families should be left alone. I don’t see what good can come of it at all. If they want to contact the media they can but its such an invasion of privacy at a horrific time to arrive at someone’s home and ask them for an interview.
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I can still remember the first ‘death knock’ I did like it was yesterday. 20 years old and fresh faced out of the police academy, knocking on a couples door at 2am in the morning and telling them their teenage son had been killed in a car accident. I put a raincoat on so they wouldn’t see his blood on my shirt.
I can still hear his mother’s wail of grief. I can also still hear my old boss saying, ‘thank christ we got there before the media told them.’
12 years later it still doesn’t get any easier. The families are so grief stricken, confused and in a total state of shock and despair – which is why I find it so hard to fathom why it is necessary for journalists to conduct their version of a ‘death knock’ so soon after such tragedy when clearly these people are in no state to think logically or give proper consent.
I appreciate journalists want to get a ‘message’ out there, but why so soon?
As police this is the last thing anyone wants to have to do – but it must be done. That’s part of our job and I accept that. Even after all these years I still sob secretly in the car afterwards, knowing that these poor peoples lives have been changed forever. So why, oh why, would a journalist do this when they don’t have to? This is not a ‘service’, it’s not ‘part of the job’ – it’s taking advantage of people in order to bump up sales.
And it’s just plain sad.
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I think this post is something every journalism student needs to read. Journalism isn’t all Logies and glamour – it’s this. The reality is that as long as there is a demand for the stories (which I believe there is) death knocks will exist.
When I first started at journalism school and then as a journalist, I swore a death knock is something I’d never do… but it’s a different story when there’s a Chief of Staff breathing down your neck and a line of recent graduates ready to take your job.
I never had to do death knock, but I have done phone calls. As much as it was horrible and uncomfortable, sometimes – and I stress sometimes – those stories carry a message that can help other people.
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Lucy I dont agree that there simply being a demand for a certain type of story, is justification for getting the information, or for publishing it. This is exactly the thinking behind the vile invasive behaviour dished out to famous people, and it is at its worst when chasing ordinary people for stories of horror and grief in their lives. A helpful message can be protrayed without preying on the vulnerable.
Before they become corrupted by their bosses, journalism students should question this ‘demand justifies anything’ mentality very hard, and choose not to lower themselves to the meeting the demand created by the community’s most base curiousity.
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Kate, I hear what you’re saying. I do. But I also think that people respond and messages are best delivered with emotion. Also- I’ve never met a journalist who has done a death knock without the utmost respect, compassion and understanding for the family whose door they’re knocking on.
At the end of the day, like other commenters have said, people need to vote with their remotes and their wallets if they’re not happy.
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If they had the utmost respect, compassion and understanding for the family they wouldn’t be knocking on their door …
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I’m sorry Lucy, while I can accept that people have a hunger for “grief porn” (as Mia has written about before), I think the “death knock” so soon after the horrific loss of someone is just wrong.
There are surely other means and resources to telling the “story”, such as reports from the police or even witnesses nearby. I couldn’t think of anything worse than having to share my grief with the general public.
If there is something or a story to be told, let them be told by those when they are ready.
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I prefer journalism that strives for Pulitzer ‘glamour’ (aka recognition) rather than the Logies glamour that Ch7, Ch9 & Ch10 always seems to be aiming for.
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‘a big part of it is helping people tell their story’…. well, if people want to tell their story, THEY can contact the media. Otherwise the media should butt out. They shouldn’t go around asking if grieving people want to tell their story.
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My favourite band is Tool. They have songs that make you think and when I read this story and the comments that preceed mine, I was reminded of the lyrics of one of their songs (you need to read them with a touch of irony);
“Vicarious”
Eye on the TV ’cause tragedy thrills me
Whatever flavour, It happens to be like;
Killed by the husband, Drowned by the ocean
Shot by his own son, She used the poison in his tea
And kissed him goodbye, That’s my kind of story
It’s no fun ’til someone dies
Don’t look at me like I am a monster
Frown out your one face But with the other
Stare like a junkie Into the TV
Stare like a zombie While the mother
Holds her child Watches him die
Hands to the sky crying “Why, oh why?”
’cause I need to watch things die
From a distance
Vicariously I, live while the whole world dies
You all need it too, don’t lie
Why can’t we just admit it?
Why can’t we just admit it?
We won’t give pause until the blood is flowing
Neither the brave nor bold
The writers of stories sold
We won’t give pause until the blood is flowing
I need to watch things die
From a good safe distance
Vicariously I, live while the whole world dies
You all feel the same so
Why can’t we just admit it?
Blood like rain come down
Drawn on grave and ground
Part vampire, Part warrior
Carnivore and voyeur
Stare at the transmittal
Sing to the death rattle
La, la, la, la, la, la, la-lie
Credulous at best, your desire to believe in angels in the hearts of men.
Pull your head on out your hippy haze and give a listen.
Shouldn’t have to say it all again.
The universe is hostile. so Impersonal. devour to survive.
So it is. So it’s always been.
We all feed on tragedy
It’s like blood to a vampire
Vicariously I, live while the whole world dies
Much better you than I
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There’s not a lot of difference between watching the news, watching ACA or TT and watching shows like Home and Away, Law and Order, CSI, NYPD.
When there is tragedy (in the case of soapies) or in any of the various police dramas we watch between we are drawn to it. It’s a sad thing that we are, but that’s why journos like Sarah get up every morning and do this.
I can see both a positive side and negative side to this. If someone watches the nightly news and sees a grieving family plead with drivers to slow down and this person does (and would otherwise be on the fast track to be the next statistic) then a journalistic story like this is great.
But sometimes journos do seem like vultures waiting for the final breath to happen and then swoop in and take what is theirs.
September 11 was the catalyst in my opinion for the widespread media attention that Australia now has when it comes to stories of heartbreak, death and sorrow. Before that, I’d watch the news or read the paper, but now it just seems that around the clock television, radio and online press on stories like the latest shooting in Western Sydney or shark attack in Western Australia is in our face non-stop.
I like Sarah. I like Dimity. I like many of today’s reporters who do seem to care or give a shit about the feelings of their subjects.
I follow most reporters I admire on Twitter and I most like it when they write random non news related tweets as it reminds me that journos are human too (again, that’s me using irony).
To sum it up, it doesn’t matter if one family rejects the journo’s advance to get a story, there are plenty more in this modern world of social media to tell their story…
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Darrell i love Tool,and you’re spot on,Vicarious was the first thing that came to mind after reading this story fir me as well…:)
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Touch wood, I have never experienced a death knock. But as a nurse I have dealt with many a grieving family. I understand that journalists also have a job to do, but when the ED or ICU have to go into lockdown and hospital staff as well as the family get harassed for statements- well that’s just not on. Let us care for those who need it and let these poor families come to terms with the destruction of their world and often their very essence.
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Why do you have to do this? The world will keep going if people’s grief is not on the 6 o’clock news.
However, I as a doctor, have to give people bad news – whether it is a diagnosis of cancer or notify family members when their relative has died – and this needs to be done – this is a job that MUST be done. However, so much of this journalism really doesn’t need to be done. If only half the journalists in the world would change their job and become policemen, fireman, ambulance officers, nurses, doctors, DOCS workers etc – then more of the necessary jobs in the world would be done and there would be a lot less unnecessary crap on the TV and in the newspapers.
I can sympathise with you Sarah – I too have been spat at, punch, kicked in the stomach while 6 months pregnant, sworn at and abused while at work – usually by people who are intoxicated or have mental health issues – they are in the hospital and I am trying to help them. If I went to someone’s house uninvited at a time of significant hardship for them – I would almost expect to have the door slammed in my face – and that is because doing that is invading that person’s privacy. How about you just put a letter in their letter box inviting them to contact you if they wish to share their story – at least then you are giving them the opportunity without invading their privacy.
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Well said!!
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As a journalist who has also had to do death knocks – and finds them harrowing and so very sad – I am pretty shocked at the vitriol people are coming out with. Yes I’ve been abused, threatened, and a photographer friend of mine has even been assaulted on the job. But that’s what it is – it’s a job. Journalists can’t just say to their boss “no, I don’t want to do that”. Just like a nurse can’t say “no, I don’t want to change that dirty bed”. It’s part of the job. It’s a part that I can attest that journalists do not enjoy. But I agree with the author. Death knocks are done because the public will watch/read a news report that features a family member’s quote before they’ll read one that’s just a straight police telling of the story. Stop reading and it will stop. Many victim’s families feel there is something that needs to be done in the situation where someone has died in an untimely fashion – and this gives them the opportunity IF THEY WANT IT. Yes, a death knock is awful but just like with any story, a journalist’s job is to get both sides of the story. You need to call or knock and ask because if you don’t YOU AREN’T DOING YOUR JOB. And you aren’t giving the family the opportunity (not the curse of) being able to comment. It’s my job. It’s not fun. But it doesn’t make me a monster.
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Thank you. People are so quick to hate on journalists.
No one ever notices the good work we do.
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I’ve gone through the comments below and here’s the phrases I’ve picked out that refer directly to myself and my career path:
revolting
disgusting
rude
vile
intrusive
vulture
heartless hack
horrible
If ANY other group/person/job was reviled in such a way on Mama Mia all the comments would have been canned by now.
If I wasn’t honed into toughness by years of abuse on the job I’d be in tears right now.
No one knows about the story you dont “have” to do, the story you worked unpaid overtime for because you believe it should be told, or the story you’ve fought with your editor to get a run when they want to can it – just so you can help someone, or get an important message across. Stories on charity, warnings and inspirational people.
No one knows about the woman who contacted me to ask for help to hold an art exhibition for her father in law who was dying of terminal cancer. We wrote a story and no one responded. So I organised it myself and helped raise $12,000 for the family.
Journalists aren’t heartless hacks, we aren’t any of the above quotes. We’re mostly good people, just trying to do our job to the best of our abilities. We’re out there raising awareness of important things, and helping out with causes that otherwise would not be in the public eye. Death knocks are one small part of the job.
I am NOT a vulture.
I’m a journalist.
And I’m damn well proud to be one.
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I don’t think people are saying journalists are universally horrible. The act of doing a ‘death knock’ is the issue, not the profession as a whole.
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Those comments were taken directly from comments below and referring to journalists who did death knocks – not the death knocks themselves, I’m afraid. It might be less distressing if these attacks were less personal.
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Amen, A Journalist!
And to be totally honest, I am very surprised that a lot of these hate-fuelled comments have not been deleted.
Some of them are nothing more than insult slinging rants.
Some, but thankfully not all.
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What rubbish.
What you are doing is making a poor attempt to justify a despicable act. Sure, some people will want to tell their story, but most won’t. Perhaps next time you show a little respect to a greiving family and have the balls to say “no”.
You have a choice, the greiving family doesn’t.
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If you hate us (journalists) and our work then stop consuming it.
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I think you’ll find the majority of MM readers are not the people consuming the crap of 6:30 programs and The telegraph and even 6 o’clock news.
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That’s why I don’t watch the news or read the newspapers anymore!
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Good for you. Vote with your remote control. That’s what I tell everyone.
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What a cop-out. You’re saying you don’t need to behave ethically until you are forced to.
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I am the daughter of police and I studied journalism. I haven’t done a death knock but I did have to make some difficult phone calls when the journalist assigned to a high profile death was unable to get a statement (probably because he was a p***k but that’s another story….)
I behaved well within the ethical boundaries of the MEAA and the news organisations protocols. It wasn’t fun. I did not enjoy it. But my approach was accepted and we got the statement needed.
Did we need it? Yes we did. This was a high profile death and people wanted to know what happened. Journos are looking to report facts. Consumers of news want details. Again its not pretty but it’s the reality of what people want.
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How can you ask a grieving family “how they feel” without expecting to upset them, if a family wants to comment they will contact someone…..
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I find this kind of preying on grieving people just disgusting,but as long as there are people getting off on watching it,i guess they will keep on doing it.
It’s the same as slowing down to gape at a traffic accident,hoping to catch a glimpse of an injured person,or-oh yes- even better,a corpse…
I really wonder what’s going on in peoples heads,and i am more and more disturbed by the things that are considered perfectly fine these days…pfui!
Another sad example for this kind of sick,twisted reporting:The other day i was watching the late news,where they covered the earthquake near Aceh.While experts were explaining that a tsunami was extremely unlikely this time,Channel 7,9 or 10 (can’t remember which one i was watching)showed nonstop pictures of the horrific devastation in 2004.I’d be very interested to hear from a journalist the sense behind that,because i certainly can’t see it….
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When I read the title of this article, I actually thought this was going to be a piece on how hard it is for members of the police to notify families that a loved one has died.
I know what you have to do may be hard, but I really feel for all the policemen and women out there, and the doctors and nurses working in emergency departments and other areas of the hospital.
They have to do this on a regular basis, and trust me, it isn’t easy!
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Jess, this is what I thought too. As said by DD, I am a police officer also and despite understanding that this is part of the job, nothing will ever stop the feeling of dread in the pit of your stomach when you have to complete such a task. The death knock is the duty of a police officer (or doctor, etc.), NOT of the media.
Sarah Harris, I’m sure you are a lovely person, but your article really makes me cringe.
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I agree, I thought the article was going to be about what police and doctors have to do, telling people the worst thing they will ever hear. It is the most gut wrenching part of my job and I want to throw up every time I have to do it. As I read the article, the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. Do journalists and their editors really think this is a good idea? I am truly shocked and saddened.
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“I’ve been physically threatened. Screamed at. Spat on. I’ve had doors slammed in my face, been pelted with beer bottles and rotten food. Our crew car’s been damaged. But you just have to wear it. Grief does strange things to people.”
That comment (especially the last line) makes it sound like you consider these people to be temporarily insane and that what you are doing is perfectly OK, even a service.
It’s not.
I don’t need to see with my own eyes, someone crying over a death in the family, to know how devastating it must be.
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That line annoyed me too. It’s not strange to get angry if someone close to you has died and you get a reporter knocking on your door.
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Pelting someone with beer bottles? In any other circumstance HOW is bottling someone acceptable? In any other circumstance it’s a serious criminal offence.
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Isn’t that the point.. these are clearly people in massive pain, out of their minds with anger and grief then some person knocks on the door and asks how they feel and if they’d like to be interviewed about it… they are in no condition to be interviewed. They are people out of control.
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Yes I agree. I found that line really off. Are suppose to feel sorry for her? I also thought this piece was going to about police officers offering the news of the death of a loved one. That must be horrendous.
Sorry, I just don’t feel any admiration for journalists who do this. I think it’s pretty off. When families have been left in peace to grieve their families to choose to come out and speak about the death of their loved one that’s their choice. I think it’s cruel for them to be preyed on at such a vulnerable time.
I never watch the evening years and haven’t for years.
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Honestly, I am appalled at some of the rude comments disagreeing with the practice of ‘death knocks.’
Sarah has hit the nail on the head – you are polite, gentle and respectful. If they say no, you leave. No pushing, no bullying (like 90% of commenters seem to believe journalists are…) and no rudeness.
It’s awful, but you have to do it.
And do you want the truth about why news outlets still feel the need to do this?
Because YOU consume it, people.
It really bothers me when audiences are so quick to blame those in the media (like Sarah) and yet fail to realise that the power of dictating content really does lie in their own hands.
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Chicken and egg argument?
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Personally, I don’t think so.
Maybe you could elaborate further on that on?
But I do think it takes a pretty concerted effort to change the angles (e.g: what we are starting to see with the portrayal of women in magazines etc.)
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While Im clearly not MaryV, here is my take on her “chicken egg” theory.
I wont deny that the public have a desire to hear about tragedy. I for one, jumped online as soon as I heard about the Christchurch Earthquakes and also the Queensland Floods.
However, I wasn’t searching for stories of grief. I wanted to know the facts, and also if there was any hope. I couldn’t stand to hear and/or watch the horrific grief stricken faces of family members mourning. It just didn’t feel right at all.
Perhaps the public are just tolerating the “grief porn” (not my term, but something already used on MM before) while we wait for fact-based stories or even hopeful ones. Maybe the public aren’t so eager to SEE HOW Mr and Mrs John Doe reacted to the horrible news about their daughter… but simply what occured and why.
Would ratings on the news change if you simply reported the facts, rather than the emotions? Who knows? Hopefully!
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Ahhh okay.
I can definitely see where you (and MaryV) are coming from. And this may be the case for a lot of people.
But the truth of the matter is that the majority want to see the family, the face to the name, a personal element. It is similar to the thinking that “this is a person, not just a statistic.”
As I have mentioned before, if people fight strongly enough then change can happen! The ratings can shift, of course.
At the moment, though, I think the public is still very much hooked on “grief porn” (the term makes me shudder.)
As a side note – I would like to thank you for fleshing out this idea without calling me a heartless vulture, vile or a stain on society.
The fact that we can disagree without flinging insults; breath of fresh air!
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If the power of dictating content really did lie in my hands, TT & ACA wouldn’t be on 5 nights a week & Karl Sandilands would be doing something out of the public eye.
Surely you can work out that the people commenting here may not be the same as the ones who consume news grief porn.
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Well put.
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I would hope that they are not the same people, but I honestly struggle to believe that.
In fact, I daresay the mamamia target audience is very similar to the target audience of shows exactly like TT, ACA and the commercial news stations/papers that regularly use these times of “grief” stories.
They are more often than not aimed at 30ish – 65 women, usually (but not necessarily) with children/families.
Maybe it is just me, but I think that it is an extension of the mamamia demographic.
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Err, no. I think it’s rude to intrude into their grief at all.
You don’t have to do it. I certainly don’t consume that type of media, it’s part of the reason I don’t watch commercial tv.
And even if people apparently want to consume it (who are these people? the type who watch Today Tonight?), why does that mean you need to give it to them? Why does that absolve you of moral responsibility and give you a free pass to have no integrity?
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Chances are, yes you do. Every news outlet – from The Sydney Morning Herald to your local rag – does it. Where do you think stories about dead people COME from?
It’s part of the job. Every journo has to do it. It’s not fun. Blame the system, not the reporter.
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Why does reporting on a story have to involve death knocking the family in the midst of their grief? What does it really add?
There’s a difference between reporting the facts of an event and going too far into peoples’ private lives.
I do blame the system, I think it’s awful that it is a compulsory part of a necessary job. It’s something that needs to change.
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‘It’s awful, but you have to do it.”
Um, actually, no, you do not.
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I’d like to see you say to your boss that you won’t do a fundamental part of your job.
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If my boss told me to do that, I wouldn’t do it. It’s possible to write a story without it. Go and pretend you did it and they weren’t home if you aren’t prepared to refuse to do it.
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Glad to see you have no concerns about losing your job when your boss finds out you lied to them, but some of us have mortgages to pay and kids to feed.
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Right, so it’s ok to do the wrong thing if you’re being paid for it?
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I think as soon as I figured out it would be a mandatory part of my job I’d get the hell out of the profession. Everyone has bills, most people change careers during their lifetime several times. At the end of the day I could not live with myself doing this to people.
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That’s lovely. Blame the consumer. I await snuff films, trauma corpses and pornography on Channel 9 because the masses ‘consume it’. As a television viewer, there is disconnection between the reality and the product. It is not a step too far for some people to sit back with a bag of crisps watching a grieving mum. Journalists of course are nearer to the frontline, and it would be nice if someone said ‘hang on, this is going too far and i don’t want to be a part of it.’. Sadly, there is a dearth of personal responsibility throughout our society, so this article is no surprise.
Do i watch this type of trash? Ha. I have a brain and a conscience, so the answer is no.
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I am not solely blaming the consumer.
I am just pointing out that it is very quick and easy for the consumer to point the finger without realising their own part in it. (obviously not you, as you do not engage with these media stories, right?)
That is my particular annoyance with situations like this.
The media requires feedback to work, and unfortunately, overwhelmingly the feedback reads as: we don’t want a cold ‘statistic’, we want a face, family, and familiarity to the name.
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“The media requires feedback to work”
Good, so why are you ignoring the feedback which people have given here?
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I am not ignoring the feedback.
As has been urged, vote with your remote controls and your mouse when you click on a story.
If we just focus on TV for a moment – ratings! That is where the ratings are.
You personally may not watch but the feedback from the MAJORITY, do.
It’s really quite exhausting having to explain this over and over. But I do, because I love my job.
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You don’t have to do it.
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We had a “drive by” shooting in the villa complex I used to live at. An innocent person’s live was turned upside down when the criminals got the wrong villa. The media knocked on our door at 6am for a comment and were there for most of the day. When my husband and I told them we didn’t want to comment they were very respectful.
Where the line was crossed was when the reporter for the evening news turned up. The guy driving the broadcast truck parked it in what was very obviously not a car parking space and didn’t care that he was blocking our and our neighbours side access. We asked them to leave at the point and to be fair, the reporter said it was best they broadcast from out front.
They are journalists and they do have a job to do. As long as they are respectful, then I don’t have a problem. Every walk of life has its bad eggs and I can’t speak for everyones experiences but my experience with a journalist knocking on my door has been ok.
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I struggle with a lot of issues related to ‘the media’. I abhor the way magazines promote only one type of beauty, but yet I still buy them. I hate when newspapers beat up a political story, but I’ll still click the link to read what Tony Abbott or Julia Gillard have said now. I know it is hypocritical for me to criticise the media outlets in those cases.
But this is one area where I have no such conflict. This is a well written article and I think Sarah makes some interesting points. However I just can see no reason for putting a grieving wife/husband/child/parent/family through this. And unlike the other examples I feel totally justified in saying that, because there is no way I would want to watch that interview or read that article.
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‘Grief does strange things to people’
Ah no, money and justification do strange things to people. What an absolutely vile way to make a living. On what planet is it ok to invade the space of families who are in excruciating pain? What a
shameful aspect of our society, I’m disturbed it’s even legal.
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Really? Some of these families “really want to talk”? Or perhaps you’re getting confused with the absolute grief and shock of the situation they are now facing. Some people will readily talk when they’re in shock. I wonder when it wears off how they feel about speaking with the media?
I agree that reporting on tragic situations can help convey relevant safety messages but let the police spokesperson tell the audience about the ‘lesson to be learnt’ cos I certainly don’t want to watch the “how are you feeling” line of questioning of vulnerable families and sounds like most of the commenters are of the same opinion.
Sarah, I do feel for you as it is what you are paid to do but as the policeman below points out, the media does have a choice about the death knock whereas he and his colleagues don’t.
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Yes, some of these really families do want to talk.
You will find that this is particularly the case with road incidents (drink driving, hit and run, etc.)
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OK, but still goes back to my point that these people are in shock and vulnerable when they agree to an interview and at a later point in time might wish they hadn’t. Just because it is done ‘respectfully’ doesn’t make it right.
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I’d like to think if an unexpected, preventable death happened to someone close to me I’d be strong enough to talk to the media and tell that person’s (and our grief’s) story if I felt it could prevent the same thing to another family. Of course, there is also the likelihood I’d turn into a blubbering mess.
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I feel that journalism has strayed from what it once was: bringing news of events that may affect our lives, exposing corruption etc, if death knocks are an accepted part of a story. They just feel wrong, like car crash journalism.
This story was well written and it was heartening that Sarah feels discomfort doing it. She should.
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I can’t believe this. Thankfully I’ve never had to experience a ‘death-knock’ and didn’t really know they existed.
To what end? Seriously, can you tell me what the point of disturbing people at their lowest point is? Nothing can justify it.
The public interest? The public already knows that any loss in a car crash etc, any loss at all, is heartbreaking. They don’t need an intrusive window into the private heartbreak. If it’s a turn-off for viewers, why do it?
To show the family’s love for their lost one? They can do this in their own time, on their own terms. Leave them alone. As someone said below, leave a card with your number (if you must) so they can call you later if they want.
To get the message about drugs/speeding etc across? Again, they can do that LATER.
Vultures, heartless hacks? Absolutely, if it looks like one, talks like one.. Actually step back and have a think about what you’re doing. And don’t do it. It really is wrong, it feels awful to do it because it is awful.
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“Vultures, heartless hacks?”
Did you even read her article?!
What a horrible thing to say about somebody that you don’t know.
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Okay Anon, fair call. I am sorry for saying that about journos, I know they are just people doing a job the best they can.
The subject made me feel quite strongly and I should’ve thought my comment through better.
I would however like to direct that comment at the establishments that expect things like death knocks from their staff. There is something wrong with an industry if it makes its employees do such things as this as an everyday part of the job.
It makes me think of the UK media and all of the phone-hacking etc. Where do we draw the line, will it continue to slip until that is normal too?
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No. As the story said, you’re police, respectful, you give them space. You don’t have your notepad out, your camera’s off.
You ask if they want to tell their story and if they pelt you wiith tomatoes or say please leave, you leave.
It’s not just for an emotional story, guys. You’ve got to talk to everyone to check the facts.
@Amandarose – Often that is how it’s done (leaving a note).
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You are missing the point though. Yes they are asking them at a horrid time if they want to talk… if they say no… they leave. How is that invading their privacy by merely asking one question?
When someone tragically dies, it is sad and horrible, yet I read from relatives what a wonderful person they were and how they made a difference in their lives. For families to know that the world can see how special their lost loved one was is why journalists will always continue this practice.
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Can’t you see though they are knocking within hours of the knock that changed their lives forever. I can fully understand they would be expecting someone there to help, give more information rather than a reporter. They would be in unbelievable amounts of pain and shock and they should be ok because the interloper was polite? Give them a break.
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maybe it is your conscience – you feel lousy as you know your crossing a line.
leave a note, or phone but going up to someone’s door is just rude all for th sake of a story.
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Bluergh. Your job is horrible, sorry. And I fail to be convinced by your argument about gathering a news story for public interest. If a person wants to tell their story, share their grief, let them come to you, for God’s sake.
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Sarah, what a tough topic to write about. As a journo who has done quite a few death knocks I recognise that sick feeling. It’s easy for people to say they would never do it when they’ve never been asked to. It’s not justification to say that many grieving families do appreciate the opportunity to talk about their loved one – or fight for that dangerous road to be fixed – or call for the hit and run driver to be found.
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I agree with many of the other comments – this is so wrong. It’s trashy, grief porn journalism. There is no story to collect; there’s hardly any question of how the bereaved are feeling. If they want to issue a statement or photos then they can.
I break bad news as part of my job because i have to. Witnessing the grief of others is intensely unpleasant, especially if youve bothered to get to know the people beyond ‘a knock at the door’.
Journalists are not military conscripts or slaves – they have the power and right to say no to this morallly repugnant task. Blaming the boss/industry is just a cop out. Non journalists can help by not buying rubbishy newspapers and watching pseudo news like Today Tonight. SBS dont seem to be filling their news with death knocks..
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So because you think death knocks are reprehensible, journalists should all quit their jobs?
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If that is all they do, then yes. If they also cover celebrity Paris Hilton type rubbish, then probably yes again. If they are of the Robert Fisk type, then no. There is news we need to know about, but much of what is presented to the masses is not news in any sense of the word. I admire the educated, restrained and courageous journalist – those who can just as easily write political or scientific commentary as a purely news type piece. Sadly, this type seems to be endangered.
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I did death knocks. They weren’t the majority of my job, but I did them. Media jobs are hard enough to come by, and if I refused to do it, I would have been fired and replaced. Those journalists you speak of would have almost all had to do a death knock at some point in their career.
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Sensationalized or ‘foot in the door’ journalism really just reminds me of a Current Affair or similar times of ‘crappy’ news shows. There may by a time and a place for interviewing families that have dealt with loss especially if there is a message to be learned from them – eg. don’t speed, don’t do drugs… but in most cases it is simply poor taste
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I might get strung up for this opinion, but I can see why they can be considered an important part of a story – especially in circumstances where it has a profound message such as the teenager who died from taking a pill. Raw emotions have an impact on people while a story is fresh – the impact wont be as large as it would be three weeks later when it is ‘old news’.
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I wanted to write that earlier. Not as an excuse, but as a window into why the media goes after the death knock so quickly. If the story carries an important message (about water safety, road safety etc) then it needs to be told while the story is new.
The news cycle, however unfortunately, does move on after that. Not saying it’s right, just how it is.
I once had same argument with police when one threatened no access to major breaking crime stories. I argued the point: so when you come back in three weeks and want to hunt down a murderer or criminal, you’ll be doing so when the public isn’t invested in the story because it had no images, no emotional connection to it in the first place.
It’s a strange world.
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“If the story carries an important message (about water safety, road safety etc) then it needs to be told while the story is new”
Well, no. If the message is important, then careful analysis, research, work etc is even more important – and that takes a bit more time.
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Not saying it doesn’t need that but, like it or not, people respond to emotion as well. None of this stuff works in isolation. There’s a reason every great story, every great newspaper article ever told involves some skerrick of emotion.
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Your responses here are too polished and cold for me, Rick. I don’t agree – you don’t need fresh grief, an interview of a person in deep pain/shock to get the best story. No way.
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I’m just being honest. All I can do, sorry if you find them cold. Half the time I’m trying to play devil’s advocate because I’m worked in the industry and know how they operate
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But I think there are more ways to include emotion in the story than invading someone’s grief by sending an inexperienced* journalist to ask ‘how do you feel?”
(* who might feel as if they have no choice – not a coincidence)
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Rick in my opinion, there will always be emotion in relationship to a death of any kind really. In majority of circumstances people will listen and heed notice when it is an ongoing story ie my child isnt here because they took drugs just one time etc sensationalism in a story is losing the meaning and its intensity now because it happens so often. There is no need for death knocks in my opinion I dont remember any great story or newspaper article that came out of the sensationalism of a day of the death griefing person. I do remember many follow up stories that were amazing though!.
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Sorry I don’t buy the message angle because those who would benefit from it are the least likley to read or watch the news. Nor will they respond to preachinig. It is their parents that get any message offered.
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So maybe the news should never do any story that tries to send an important message? Launch no campaign, because no one is listening?
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Is it about important messages or ratings?
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As I said below Rick – what is the important message that Sarah just had to get out there for the good of the community in this instance? That there are sharks in the ocean? She needed to use a families grief for us all to know that?
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I’m talking about death knocks more broadly. As I said, each one is different.
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Here is a scoop for you. We do not want to see grieving families, we do not want to see crash sites and we do not want to see hack journalists stomping around disaster zones looking for the major scoop (Stefanovic & Koch in Japan, NZ and QLD sickened me).
Leave the people alone, I’m sick to death of sensationalised journalism. Death knocks are revolting and so are the journalists that do them.
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I agree with you. That is why I no longer watch the news on a commercial channels. I stick to ABC & SBS.
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ABC journos and SBS journos do death knocks too.
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I agree with you Butters. When the put pictures up of a deceased person being wheeled away on a trolley etc sickens me. Is there really a need for it?
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I worked for many years as the media spokesperson for a major hospital. Some of the encounters I had with aggressive journalists were despicable. They stalked families experiencing major grief in the most aggressive way. Once I caught a camera crew from channel seven trying to sneak into our intensive care unit to film the victim of an explosion. At the time I had explained to the many journos asking for comment that the mans wife was in hospital herself having just given birth and was not aware of the situation. We did everything we could to protect her from seeing images of her husband on TV and learning about the tradegy via the media.
This is just one of many examples of the lack of professionalism and empathy displayed by journalists for whom a story is more important than the welfare of the patient and their family.
I am sure there are some reporters with more dignity and grace but I didn’t meet many of them. I believe that people should share their stories if they want to but they should not be harassed by the media in their darkest hour and their wishes should be respected.
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Good on you, it sounds like you went well above and beyond to protect the woman.
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I honestly don’t understand the need for “death knocks”. What could possibly be said by a grieving family that needs to be reported publicly??? Leave them alone – if they wish to make a public statement in their own time- so be it.
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I completely agree. I think that family members may want to talk, and it may be cathartic and healing for them, but not mere hours after being told of their loss. Perhaps reporters would be viewed in a more positive light if they didnt immediately scramble to get the ‘quote’, but waited until the family felt ready by letting them contact the reporter. And pigs might fly.
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I think this practice is a shocking invasion of privacy and utterly disrespectful.
I wish the journalists would unite and refuse to do it anymore. I for one would show all possible support to any media outlet who made a decision to stop this practice.
The point is made that some grieving families do wish to share their story with the public. In that case they can contact media outlets – the decision should be left to them.
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having worked at Today Tonight briefly and as a newspaper journo before that I know exactly what you describe.
The thud in your chest before you knock on the door and the guilt you feel intruding during such an excruciating time.
You’re right, many people want the chance to show the one they loved to the world. To share their highs and share in the support that comes with their passing. I particularly found this when working in country Victoria.
You do a great job Sarah and I enjoy your reporting. Remember all the good stories that come with the hard.
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I hate seeing those interviews with the journalist asking someone how they ‘feel’ after the death of a loved one with a camera shoved in their face..
It is an absolute disgrace, and to go as soon as hours or even days after the tragic event is just plain disrespectful, how do you honestly sleep those nights? These are such personal and private moments, it is not for the public eye, and if you think it completes or balances a news story you are seriously mistaken…
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Sarah, you’re very brave for lifting the lid on this one.
“Imagine you’re knocking on the door of your own mother,” someone told me at journalism school. It didn’t help.
But my admiration goes out 100 times over to those families that used the loss of their loved one to bring attention to road rules/drunk driving/drug taking/meningitis and the like. I still remember the father who let us take a photo of his daughter on life support after she took an Ecstasy tablet. She died but I have no doubt that the image, published on every front page, saved other lives.
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So you have admiration for the people who can stand up in their grief and loss and talk to a complete stranger about the death of a child, but not for the millions of parents who dont want to or cant do an interview the day of the death of a loved one?
I dont think it is something to be commended to walk up to a door of a complete stranger and ask them for a story to further your career or for your paper. The fact is those who are strong enough and more willing to be open to the public eye will do so in their own time and will seek the media and will easily receive the attention. The thought of an intrusion of such extremes not just by one journalist either, but by multiple and making the family replay the same no comment rule just on the off chance you maybe the one who gets the ‘she was the best sister in the world’ breakdown from a child herself just makes me feel physically ill.
I was a nurse for a long time in a public hospital and we had despicable journalists try to sneak in under the guise of visitors for another patient, once a pretend orderly and of course the phone calls from a concerned citizen or from their best mate…Fred!!!
There is no need for door knocks or up close pictures of people being taken into hospital, intrusions into a grielf filled world is only self serving. I
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When my young son drowned several years ago we had to stay away from our house for days because of the journalists waiting at our front door for us. It compounded an already intensely horrific situation for us and our other young children and added to the trauma. Our family were so broken, our youngest child had died tragically …it was just too awful for words. There will always be journalists who will do this because they “have” to, but you don’t have to. I know several people who have chosen to be advocates (people I greatly admire) and court the media but there are many more who prefer to keep their grief private.
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Im so sorry for your loss, and sorry that you couldnt be home when you felt you needed to be.
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I’m sorry that happened to you. How awful and unfair to have to deal with that on top of grieving for your child.
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Thank you Susie for sharing this with us as it goes to the heart of why this is such a hideous practice.
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I was doing an internship at big metropolitan newspaper once.
I was still at uni, quite “green” at the time.
I had to work Christmas and New year during my internship, a time where people’s loss seems to hit harder.
I was asked to call the family of a little boy who had drowned just days before Christmas.
I remember just sitting and staring at the phone for ages.
When the Chief of Staff came over and asked me if I had gotten a comment from the family, I lied. I said I rang but there was no answer.
She told me to keep trying. I didn’t.
I ended up filing the story, I had contacted the hospital and a children’s pool safety expert for comment. I still went home that day feeling rotten, a feeling of unprofessionalism and that I would never make it as a journo if I couldn’t do things like that.
To this day, I still don’t know why I lied but I don’t feel quilty. It’s something I couldn’t do, and it’s also something I couldn’t do to a family experiencing what I can only imagine is the worst pain in the world.
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I can’t believe they asked you to phone. I know death knocks aren’t nice, but the least they could do was do it in person. You did the right thing.
Many journos call that idea ‘knocking on grass’. You go to the home, but don’t approach. Or you just go grab a coffee and wait enough time and go back to the office.
I’m not sure why I never did that. I was younger then, I suppose.
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Huh? How is phoning worse than barging up to the front door? Both are dispicable but at least a phone call is a distanced approach. I hate to think how I’d react if I had a journo on my doorstep in the aftermath of a family tragedy. Violently I suspect.
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Thank you from the bottom of my heart…that wasn’t me but I only know that because the dates don’t match, otherwise, that was ME you didn’t call. Thank you for your kindness, it is very sincerely appreciated. I wish other journos had the same sensitivity. By the way, I am actually a trained broadcast journalist myself. I understand both sides of this coin.
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You did the right thing – not calling that family. I would have lied too.
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I did exactly the same thing when I was first asked to make a similar call. I was asked to call a man on the anniversary of the death of his wife to “ask him how he felt”. I just couldn’t do it, so I said the phone rang out. Having been a journalist for more than ten years, I’ve been lucky I’ve avoided too many similar situations.
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Death knocks are absolutely revolting and I totally disagree that they are needed to tell the story. What new information do I get from seeing someone shattered with grief being asked stupid questions about how they feel? I strongly question whether anyone has the capability to give real consent in those situations – most of those people just look utterly disoriented. I change the channel when journalists do death knocks. I do not want to participate in any way in this awful, prurient desire to watch someone overwhelmed by distress and grief.
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Ugh. It might be part of your job but I don’t think that makes it ok. Justify it as much as you like, but knocking on someone’s door a few hours after their child has died is disgusting. Absolutely disgusting. Best case scenario those people are being disturbed and having to come to the door and say ‘no interviews’ when they’re in shock and grieving. Worst case scenario they are being harassed and asked ‘How does it feel’ after their kid has died..
Perhaps some of them want to tell their story. But hours or days after their loved one has died is NOT the time, they are not capable of making the decision to publicise their grief. 99% of the time you are taking advantage of people to make a better story and ultimately sell more copies, I think it’s a bit disingenuous to try and say otherwise. Surely the fact that people spit on you, threaten violence, damage your equipment, and scream at you is enough to make you realise you’re doing an awful thing to people.
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Death knocks are unfortunately part of being a journalist. It’s part of the coverage that’s needed to tell the story in its entirety. I’ve always felt like I owed it to the people involved to let them share their story in their own words. I’ve never felt good about doing them; I’ve often dissolved into tears once I’ve made it back to my car because you have to be professional during the process. Thanks for writing this article Sarah; it’s an extremely well written and informative piece about a sensitive subject.
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“I’ve been physically threatened. Screamed at. Spat on. I’ve had doors slammed in my face, been pelted with beer bottles and rotten food. Our crew car’s been damaged. But you just have to wear it. Grief does strange things to people.”
You don’t “just have to wear it”. As if it’s some essential, selfless service that you’re providing.
I agree with all the comments below, that if people want to make their private grief public, they will come to you.
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Unfortunately, journos do “just have to wear it”… The questions of why death knocks should be done should be asked of a news editor or manager – none of my colleagues (across print and broadcast) likes doing them but it’s what you’re asked to do.
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