It’s the only way.

I never knew this party practice had a name but now that I know it does, I’m tempted to get myself a GHOSTER t-shirt – if it weren’t so completely contrary to the ethos of the act.

You see, Ghosters are the ones who like to slip, unannounced and unnoticed, from a social gathering.

“I’m just going to the bathroom” is the catch-cry of Ghosters everywhere. And you know what happens next.

As Seth Stevenson from Slate puts it:

Why do we do it? Oh for so many reasons. The main one is this: nobody wants to know that you are leaving their party. To do so, you must interrupt them, announce that you are leaving and confirm that yes, you ARE leaving. Yes, you’re sure because [insert lame excuse here]. Then you must withstand their inevitable exhortations to stay longer. Next, endure inevitable accusations of being a piker, a pussy, a wuss, a wimp and a nana. Finally and excruciatingly, you must remain the focus of attention as you walk out the door.

It’s awkward. It’s uncomfortable. And it pleases nobody.

Read more: Six socially awkward moments that everyone can relate to

In fact, us Ghosters consider the whole public goodbye thing borderline rude. Why interrupt other people when they’re absorbed in conversations and having fun? It’s a downer to pull focus when you’re pulling the pin. Better to just silently slip away like smoke. Or a ghost.

There are some rules, as Stevenson points out:

So next time you go to a party, instead of the intrusive and buzz-killing public farewell, ghost it.

If you do it right, your host won’t even notice. Probably.

Have you ever ghosted? What’s your go-to move for leaving a party?