parents

Home alone. Who knew it was illegal?

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When I was a little girl I used to play this elaborate game when I was at home alone. I remember it well.

There was a large window in the passage that looked out onto the drive way and street. Because I was, okay am, a neurotic person every time I walked past that window I would say in a very loud voice “Uncle Ben, I am so glad you are a police man”. I’d say it really loud. And quite unnaturally because I am the world’s worst actress. Also I would do it every time I walked past the window.

I honestly believed that if there was anybody outside plotting evil against me (remember the neurosis) they would hear me talking to my make believe uncle policeman and run away.

I was young. I probably shouldn’t have been home alone. Judging by the fact that I was putting on such an elaborate (and pathetic) ruse I was far from emotionally ready to be by myself in the house.  But maybe that’s just me. A lot of people that I have spoken to were latch key kids from an early age, they came home from school, helped themselves to delicious snacks from the fridge (mostly involving chocolate) and settled down to watch TV uninterrupted by their parents. Or even their policeman uncles.

The Courier Mail reports

An Ipswich woman who left her eight-year-old boy home alone for more than five-and-a-half hours while she was working away on the Gold Coast was hauled before court.

Police charged Wendy Anne Hollingsworth, 39, for leaving a child under the age of 12 for an unreasonable time without making provisions for his supervision or care after a neighbour she asked to check on the boy made a complaint.

Hollingsworth pleaded guilty before Magistrate Donna McCallum at Ipswich Monday morning but was allowed to walk free with a six-month good-behaviour bond.

I spoke to renowned child psychologist Michael Carr Gregg one of Australia’s highest profile psychologists who specialises in the area of parenting adolescents and adolescent mental health (you can follow him on Twitter here) who says:

The big question is whether there should be a state/ commonwealth law that delineates a specific age, under which children should not be left home alone or unsupervised?

Both the Australian Childhood Foundation CEO Dr Joe Tucci and I believe that a minimum of 10 years of age should be considered. This would clarify a community standard which would be helpful for children  and parents.

The law would need to define that age was not the only factor in determining if it was safe for a child to be left alone.

The problem is that while the law tends to rely on the nomination of a particular age eg: at 18 you can get married without parental permission, fight for your country, sign a legal contract etc, psychology recognises that age does not necessarily define maturity.

My advice to parents as a Child and Adolescent Psychologist is to ask 2 key questions:

1) Does this child have a track record of making good choices and keeping themselves safe? – going on the psychological principle – that past behaviour predicts future behaviour.

2) Does the child have a sensation seeking temperament.

Do you remember being left home alone? How old were you? Would you leave your own kids at home alone ?