Sometimes you just want to Switch. Your. Brain. Off…. and flick through the latest outfits in Kardashian land, coo over a celebrity baby and hear what crazy thing Lady Gaga did recently. There’s plenty of quality brainfood elsewhere on the site if that’s what you’re after but if not, why don’t you make yourself a cup of tea, put your feet up and enjoy?
1. Beyonce’s Superbowl performance was probably better than the actual Superbowl – and then, after the concert, this happened:
This picture of a beaming Beyonce jumping into the arms of husband Jay-Z has gone viral.
Beyonce and Jay-Z have been married since 2008, and their baby girl Blue Ivy turned 1-year-old in January.
You can see the entirety of Beyonce’s booty-shakin’ halftime performance here. Must. Watch.
2. Firass Dirani topless. Oh, and a full round up of all the Australian celebrity news. Click here.
3. Wednesday night saw the launch of David Jones’ Autumn/Winter 2013 collection.
Models such as Miranda Kerr and Megan Gale showcased over 230 looks by 37 designers, including Alex Perry, Collette Dinnigan, Rachel Gilbert and Zimmerman.
Take a look through our gallery of the fashion show below. Lace and leather were big, as were prints:
No fashion show is complete without a controversy – and this year, everyone was talking about Miranda opening the show dressed in a tan dress from Ellery, a designer who recently jumped ship from Myer in an alleged breach of contract.
4. Russell Brand protects his ex-wife Katy Perry’s vagina. Just watch.
5. Shakira and her husband, soccer star Gerard Piqué, have introduced their 2-week-old son Milan to the world, with an adorable photo that will melt your ovaries.
The photo, which shows baby Milan receiving a sweet kiss from his father, is available through Shakira and Gerard’s UNICEF webpage – where they are asking for donations to celebrate the arrival of their son, to help save children’s lives. (We donated before using this picture.)
Milan is the first child of the 35-year-old Columbian singer and her footballer partner, 25. The couple have been together since 2011.
The couple write on the UNICEF website: “We hope that, in his name, other less privileged children in the world can have their basic needs covered through gifts and donations. Thank you for sharing this unforgettable moment with us.”
Click through for a gallery of other new celebrity parents:
Jennifer Love Hewett and husband Brian Hallisay.
6. For fans of Downton Abbey – or just fans of laughter – watch this.
7. The body parts Grammy organisers DON’T want to see on this year’s red carpet.
Traditionally, the Grammys red carpet is a playground for revealing outfits – remember Jennifer Lopez’s plunging green Versace dress? Of course you do.
But it seems CBS has gone all Fashion Police this year, sending attendees some very explicit dress guidelines via email. Public Enemy number one? “Buttocks” and “female breasts”.
“Thong type costumes are problematic. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic,” the email says. Obviously the organisers don’t appreciate that side-boob is so hot right now.
“Please avoid sheer see-through clothing that could possibly expose female breast nipples. Please be sure the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible ‘puffy’ bare skin exposure.”
Spare a thought for the likes of Nicky Minaj, whose entire wardrobe has probably just been ruled out.
8. Seth Cohen is dating Blair Waldorf.
More precisely, The OC‘s Adam Brody, 33, is reportedly dating Gossip Girl star Leighton Meester, 26.
The couple apparently hit it off on the set of The Oranges, a 2011 comedy they co-starred in, and their relationship has been ‘outed’ by People magazine.
That’s all very lovely, but the important question here is whether their TV alter-egos would approve of all of this.
Obviously Blair fits Seth’s dating profile – high maintenance, dark hair, hard-to-get, just like Summer in the early days. But would Blair fall for Seth’s nerdy neuroses? Somehow we doubt it.
9. Need some light weekend relief? This post on men and childbirth will make you laugh –> Click here.
10. In v. v. exciting news, a new Bridget Jones book is expected to be released in November this year.
It’s been 17 years since Bridget Jones’ Diary first hit bookstores, but the antics and adventures of the modern English heroine – embarrassing mothers and dashing suitors in knitted jumpers included – still strike a chord today.
Now, it’s been revealed that author Helen Fielding is preparing a third instalment in the Bridget series, planned for release later this year. Fielding says the book will be set in present day London and “represents a totally new phase in Bridget’s life. My life has moved on and Bridget’s will move on, too,” she explained in a press release.
Hopefully this includes Bridget branching into social media – we can only imagine the pearls of wisdom and awkward confessions she would broadcast on Twitter.
11. Lady Gaga’s former personal assistant/best friend is now alleging that she was made to “sleep with” the famously outrageous performer.
The ex-PA-come-best friend, Jennifer O’Neill, is not only suing Lady Gaga for over 7000 hours of overtime, but claims that she controlled her life.
In court papers published by the New York Post, O’Neill claims, “I was by her side virtually 24 hours a day, seven days a week. That includes sleeping in the same bed with her. Because she did not sleep alone.”
“Unlike anybody else on that tour … I did not have my own hotel room. I was not asked if I wanted my own hotel room.”
She continued: “I had no privacy, no chance to talk to any family, no chance to talk to any friends, no chance to have sex if I wanted to have sex. There was no chance to do anything.”
Lady Gaga hit back by calling O’Neill a ““f–king hood rat who is suing me for money that she didn’t earn.”
12. Jennifer Lawrence, the 22-year-old star of The Hunger Games and Silver Linings Playbook, has confessed that she’s become a bit of a stalker.
Her target? 49-year-old John Stamos, also known as Uncle Jesse from Full House.
While on American talk show Conan this week, Jennifer said: “He was at a party, and I turned into a perverted guy. I was like following him into rooms and staring at his ass. I lost my mind.”
“I didn’t want to meet him because when I meet people it’s never good, and I was avoiding him. But then my friends brought him over because my friends are jerks, and I started really freaking out. And he asked me if I was on mushrooms and I said, ‘No. I’m dead sober. This is just me.’
“I just kept smiling and being like, ‘Dude. . . Uncle Jesse.’”
But apparently John didn’t mind too much – when Nick Jonas tweeted “I envy you,” to John, he replied with, “I envy myself!”
14. Photoshop fail: the amazing geometric thigh.
Gather ’round, ladies and gents, to witness the amazing, the incredible, the impossible: the Geometric Thigh. Hailing from Planet Photoshop and seen on real live human women absolutely nowhere, the Geometric Thigh features a triangular shape and a corner sharp enough to slice pizza with. Don’t get too close!
Thanks to Hurricane Vanessa for bringing this atrocity to light.
American Apparel photoshop original