I knew the moment I heard my husband’s voice. He was head hunting me for a job, and had called me to ask for a coffee. Even though every ounce of me was crying ridiculous, I knew in a heartbeat that voice was my future. We had a long, rocky road to a normal relationship, but I still stand my ground, I knew we were soul mates and we were meant to be together, and I knew from the moment I heard his voice.
Others have said that they just knew and that there was an intrinsic belief that this relationship was a keeper. The nervousness and pressure associated with newbie relationships just wasn’t there, instead there was a comfortable knowledge that this was it.
Some say, their friendship grew quietly into a relationship with comfort and ease making way for love. Others say they didn’t even like their partner initially but they couldn’t stay away from each other as if there was some dysfunctional, magnetic pull that turned out to be love.
Professor of Psychology, John Buri, suggests that “love at first sight” is the result of an unconscious screening process, where we exclude certain people who don’t meet the criteria we look for in a partner. From those left, we do a more thorough scan to see whether more boxes can be ticked. And if they can be, then through an unconscious process of elimination we are left with “the one”. Our “one” is the person we have screened, then scanned and who ticks all the boxes.
This feels like too much too much science and intent for something that feels so special when it’s actually happening. As if there is a little magic and serendipity in the air.
I know a lovely couple, she is vivacious, bubbly and oozes energy, he, a gentle, wise man. They are having difficult times with an illness that’s putting up a battle.
“I knew the moment he walked into the room that I would marry this man”, she told us proudly, “he calmed me”. And through her chattiness, her worry is palpable. But in his presence, it’s clear that he still calms her.
Some people are just meant to find each other. Let’s call it a combination of science, timing and magic.
Do you believe in love at first sight?
Lisa Schofield is a mad keen blogger, a Kiwi trying unsuccessfully to lose her accent, a mum to 3 gorgeous fellas, and an adventure race addict. You can follow her blog here