By BENNY LEWIS
I have lived in 23 countries; that’s lived as in, spent at least a month (usually three, and over a year in some) in the country where I invested serious time into speaking its language (or already spoke its language on arrival) and tried to investigate its culture and made local friends.
This list is; Argentina, Brazil, Peru, Belgium, Colombia, the US, Canada, Ireland, UK, Spain,France, the Netherlands, Egypt, Italy, Czech Republic, Germany, Hungary, Turkey, India, the Philippines, Thailand, China, Taiwan. (I’ve also visited Poland, Uruguay, Singapore, Austria, Slovakia, Norway, and Mexico for a few days or weeks, but definitely wouldn’t consider myself to have lived in any of these and was more of a tourist, and I’ve had a flight transfer through a bunch other countries for a few hours, which I wouldn’t count at all).
I can point you to travellers who have been to many more countries than I have (most of whom have been travelling way less than I have, so it really shows the different speeds we travel at), but my style of travel and theirs is very different and I feel like I have gotten to know the modern cultures of each of these countries much more than the majority of passers-through ever do.
The thing about living in a country and truly attempting to understand its culture and language, is that you have to pick up a lot of their customs to stand out less and make them feel more comfortable. Some of these I have done only in passing and stopped almost immediately after leaving the country, but quite a few (as you’ll see here) have stuck with me for life.
Top Comments
Definitely the most interesting part of this article for me was your definition of "living" in a country. It made me think. If I followed your definition, I would have lived in more than 50 countries (yes, I'm old)... instead, I choose to believe that I've lived in 5 different countries... which ranged from stays of 2-10 years. Bought the house, had the furniture, gave birth, etc. etc. - all that fun stuff.
Fascinating, and it will be interesting to see if you revise your definition when you're older.
As an Aussie who has lived in the Netherlands for 6+ years I can 100% agree with number 11.
It really is so difficult to make Dutch friends as their social circles are very specific (hockey friends circle, primary school friends circle, university friends circle etc), they do not mix (your hockey friends will never meet your primary school friends!), and the memberships are set in stone...it reminds me of the Seinfeld bit where he says "we're just not hiring for new friends at the moment".
It also made me rethink my FB friends list as well and for several years now I have kept this to around 150-200 people (I have a big family and loads of expat friends) with a spring clean every year. It used to be around 800+ in my early days of living here!
But for all its quirks, my life is so much richer for the joy of having lived in this amazing country and the two Dutch friends I do have are so dear to me, I wouldn't exchange them for a hundred "casual acquaintances".