couples

'If astrology is rubbish, why is it so good at predicting problems in my marriage?'

It has been years since I’d researched the astrological compatibility of my star sign and that of someone I was interested in. I used to buy those little scrolls they sold at the newsagency and pour over them in an effort to find out if this one was THE one.

As a result of past dalliances I had intimate knowledge of my suitability to date the following star signs:

Sagittarius;

Aries;

Cancer.

My relationship (crush from afar) with Mr Sagittarius had huge potential with the stars suggesting that he could in fact be my soul mate. We’d both value our independence, feel secure enough to give each other space, communicate directly with no muss, no fuss however our sex life would be an “initially intellectual exercise” as opposed to an emotional one and we’d have to be careful not to be too critical of each other’s performance.

With Mr Aries the sex would be much better with words such as “impulsive”, “bold” and “adventure” being bandied about. Sign me up! However he’s a bit stubborn and slightly controlling. While he’d be initially attracted to my creativity and spontaneity he’d eventually tire of it. That’s pretty much how that relationship ended actually, with me craving more freedom and him looking at me like I was from another planet.

Jo with AstroTwins Ophira (left) and Tali (right).

Then there was Mr Cancer, or should I say there IS Mr Cancer because Mr Cancer is who I married.

Sadly, the union of Aquarius and Cancer is an astrological disaster.

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I recently had the opportunity to receive an astrological reading from the AstroTwins, Ophira and Tali, celestial celebrity star readers from the US who were in Australia at the behest of Origin Energy who were spruiking their Predictable Payment Plan which averages out your energy usage and charges you the same amount each month.

The AstroTwins have read astrological charts of celebrities such as Beyonce, Jessica Simpson and have appeared on Real Housewives of New Jersey

While they couldn't tell me how long I'd live or if I'd one day be rich, they did tell me that according to my chart I was experiencing a time of transformation.

Correct.

They also said that I wanted to travel.

Yes!

And they said that while my husband and I aren't the ideal astrological match, we could make it work, so long as I could put up with his clingy behaviour and he could find a way to feel secure in our relationship when I wanted a bit of time to myself.

They pretty much said what I already knew about my relationship.

He's suffocating you!

You're neglecting him!

Here is a small segment from my session with them:

The AstroTwins knew exactly what relationship challenges I have been facing as soon as I told them mine and my partner's star signs. They gave me some excellent advice. Article continues after this video.

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If I was clever and clear-headed I would have held out for a Libra who would have perfectly complimented my crazy ways. Apparently they may not have hung around forever however the time we had together would have worked well. Until the eventual heartbreak, but hey, you can't win them all.

My worst match would be a Virgo because he'd think I was nuts and I would think he was a stick-in-the-mud. Communication would have been difficult and there'd be major power-struggles.

I'm taking all of the AstroTwin's advice to take more time to reassure my husband of my complete and utter life-long devotion to him, no matter how tedious I find it. I mean, if after 18 years together, a wedding, three children and packing his lunch for him most days for the past eight years, what more can I do to help him understand how much I love him? Then I need to ensure he gives me the space I need to think and feel and grow.

Nothing makes an Aquarius love you more than giving them time to miss you, or so I've heard.

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I have no idea what any of this means but this is my personal astrological projection chart. Image: Provided

So there you have it. My astrological reading with the Astro Twins who were encouraging of the potential my Aquarius-Cancer union had. But what were they going to say? Break up? Not likely. That ship has well and truly sailed.

Astrological information confirmed at compatible-astrology.com.